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I'm So Not Over You
It’s been months since aspiring journalist Kian Andrews has heard from his ex-boyfriend, Hudson Rivers, but an urgent text has them meeting at a café. Maybe Hudson wants to profusely apologize for the breakup. Or confess his undying love. . . But no, Hudson has a favor to ask—he wants Kian to pretend to be his boyfriend while his parents are in town, and Kian reluctantly agrees.
The dinner doesn’t go exactly as planned, and suddenly Kian is Hudson’s plus one to Georgia’s wedding of the season. Hudson comes from a wealthy family where reputation is everything, and he really can’t afford another mistake. If Kian goes, he’ll help Hudson preserve appearances and get the opportunity to rub shoulders with some of the biggest names in media. This could be the big career break Kian needs.
But their fake relationship is starting to feel like it might be more than a means to an end, and it’s time for both men to fact-check their feelings.
The dinner doesn’t go exactly as planned, and suddenly Kian is Hudson’s plus one to Georgia’s wedding of the season. Hudson comes from a wealthy family where reputation is everything, and he really can’t afford another mistake. If Kian goes, he’ll help Hudson preserve appearances and get the opportunity to rub shoulders with some of the biggest names in media. This could be the big career break Kian needs.
But their fake relationship is starting to feel like it might be more than a means to an end, and it’s time for both men to fact-check their feelings.
364 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 22, 2022
148 people are currently reading
13168 people want to read
About the author
Kosoko Jackson
14 books767 followersBorn and raised in the DC Metro Area, Kosoko Jackson has worked in non-profit communications for the past four years. His debut, YESTERDAY IS HISTORY, comes out 2021 by SourcebooksFire.
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January 20, 2022Source of book: NetGalley (thank you)
Relevant disclaimers: nope
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
This is an incredibly stylish, charismatic romcom with a lot of potential that, for me, didn’t quite come together emotionally.
It’s got a fucking amazing premise though: it’s fake-dating meets second-chance-a-love type deal where the guy who dumped the protagonist asks him to play boyfriend to a family wedding because he hasn’t got round to telling his folks they’ve broken up. And I really cannot emphasise enough just how brilliant I find this as a way to authentically queer a set of genre tropes that are—for better or worse but undeniably—embedded in heterosexual mores (and it’s not my place to speak on this, but I suspect assumed whiteness must be a factor too). And please don’t get me wrong, I’m not criticising those genre tropes for being that way per se (romance is still predominately m/f, a greater percentile of people in the world are straight, that’s just the way it is numerically speaking) but it does create a challenge for queer writers because the experiences or fantasies that are common enough to (cis white?) heterosexuals as to be recognisable as actual tropes don’t necessarily feel that way to queer people, nor speak to their life experiences.
Faking dating is a really good at example of this because, like, ye standard fake dating set-up for an m/f romance is “I basically need a warm male body to take to a family event because we still live in a world where women are deemed to be failures if they don’t have a romantic partner and the romantic lives of women are seen as public business.” Within that context it makes complete sense for a heroine to take her best friend’s brother she’s met twice or a man she spilled coffee in in a lift: the social cache of not being single, and the fact m/f dating comes pre-enshrined in an approved cultural context, means the heroine turning up with a strange bloke at a family party will be met with enthusiasm rather than concern. By contrast, if you’re a queer person, especially if you’re a queer man, and you show up with some rando in tow you’re more likely to get a response among the lines of “why did you bring last night’s Grindr date to Cousin Ermintrude’s wedding, what the fuck is wrong with you”. Or worse, “do you have to flaunt yourself like that, this is supposed to be a family event.”
The fact of the matter of is, it’s too easy to look at the romance genre and assume that making it queer just involves sticking queer people in it. And, you know, sometimes that can work and I’m not going to knock it. But it can also be a deeply disorientating experience to queer readers because it doesn’t always feel … about us. It feels like it’s using us to speak to people who aren’t us. Because being queer (and, again, I’m sure this goes for being Black and queer but I don’t want to make assumptions on behalf of people who aren’t me) is about cultural context as much as its about personal identity. And what’s so compelling about Jackson’s writing—over and above the elements of the book that didn’t quite click for me—is the way he makes not just the tropes he’s deploying but the whole of framework of genre romance work in support of the story he’s telling: a romcom that’s funny, sexy, tender and smart in ways that feel inseparable from and fully reflective of both its queerness and its Blackness. That’s whole hell of an accomplishment and it made my queer heart sing.
Where it kind of came unstuck for me—and this may well be a me thing—is around the relationship itself. I actually really loved both characters. Kian is a nerdy, insecure eminently relatable protagonist, who is slightly adrift in his early twenties, pining for his ex, trying to break into journalism, and his interior monologue made me laugh and wince in equal measure. Like, that is a man who can deliver a zinger, very often at his own expense. Something I think the text navigates slightly less successfully is his, well, just how blunt he can be. On the one hand, it’s really satisfying to have a protagonist who says what he feels and what he thinks, but given that this can be as hurtful and problem-causing, as it can be helpful and liberating (I mean, in life as well as in fiction) it always came across as a little narratively untethered: like you never know if Kian is being a dick or saying the thing that needed saying, and sometimes it’s both, and sometimes it’s neither, and I really wanted to see that worked through as a character trait. Not that I was looking for Kian to change necessarily but given how sensitive he is to the power of words in general (he’s a journalist after all) I never got the sense that he (or the text) ever really came to terms with his tendency to use them recklessly. Of course, Kian also has anxiety so “blurting out his brain” may just as well have been related to that.
His love interest is Hudson Rivers: the wayward son of an extremely wealthy Black southern family. I felt like there was a lot less to Hudson than there was to Kian, or at least we see less because we’re never in his head. But then an on-going discussion point of the genre is the difference between books that have co-protagonists and books that are anchored mainly in one character, with the other being a subject of desire. Hudson, though, is a very successful subject of desire. He’s very much portrayed as a southern gentleman, which is not usually a fantasy I have access to because when I read m/f books with a hero like that, he tends to come across as someone who would be uncomfortable shaking my hand. So there’s something really satisfying and subversive about being presented with many of the hallmarks of that kind of hero (the old-worldly charm, the protectiveness, the secret vulnerability) embedded in a Black, openly queer character. It feels like a very “I’m in your base” move except by base I mean “genre” and “killing all your dudes” I mean “queering all your things.”
And the thing is, that when Kian and Hudson are on page together, they have a really strong connection, with great dialogue and fantastic chemistry (there’s a making-out-in-a-car scene that’s just absurdly hot), and there’s a few romantic set-pieces (Hudson declaring his feelings, for example) that absolutely hit the spot. It’s just … how do I explain … I felt I was missing many of the structural elements that give a fictional romantic relationship its broader shape beyond its component parts. Like, to me, (and, again, this is might just be about the way I personally think about romance narratives) it’s not enough to hit the beats (and now they kiss, now they argue, now they reveal parts of themselves they haven’t previously): you need the connective tissue that gives the beats their meaning for this particular couple.
To take a concrete example, before the book begins, we learn that Hudson broke up with Kian abruptly—and that this has left Kian heart-broken and lacking closure. And while Kian does allow us to see something of their previous relationship through his memories, we never actually find out what went wrong between them or why they broke up. Kian’s friend Divya (the supporting cast, by the way, are also excellent, whether it’s Kian’s aggressively successful younger brother, or Divya the ride or die friend, or Hudson’s hard-as-nails-take-no-shit grandmother) offers some insight—something about Kian nagging Hudson about his family, I don’t even know—but it’s not enough to make it feel real on the page. And, of course, I’m not saying there needed to be a deep and significant issue that split them up and squats over the text like a giant squid. Small things, or unresolved tensions, or whatever. But we never find out what they were. We never find out why Hudson did it. And they never … ever … talk about it. Apart from Hudson briefly acknowledging that he really hurt Kian and Kian agreeing that he did.
I should add that I’m aware that the book is deeply concerned with masculinity, especially as it intersects with Blackness and queerness, and that issues of emotional vulnerability feed into that. Like, one of the things we learn from Kian’s recollections of his relationship with Hudson is that Hudson is very charming and sociable, but rarely actually expresses what he really thinks or feels—which, again, contrasts in significant ways with Kian’s tendency to say what he means to the point of, arguably, saying too much. And I can maybe see why having them explicitly NOT talk about what happened was meant to show they’d both moved beyond it. But given that what little confrontation they have involves Kian storming into a taxi shouting “I’m so over you” (which is a total lie) while Hudson stands silently in front of his house in a towel, it didn’t feel like closure so much as them both being trapped within the aspects of their personalities that, to some degree, hinder their own happiness and maybe drove them apart in the first place?
I really don’t want to approach a book that has put so much thought and energy into subverting tropes, both large and small, by being “well this is how the trope works so you have do it like that” but, for me, what a second-chance-at-love type arc hinges upon is believing that Relationship Round II is meaningfully different to Relationship Round I. And if you don’t know what went wrong in Round I, it’s hard to understand what is motivating Round II, you know? I mean, it’s easy to see why both Kian and Hudson are attractive, and attractive to each other, and Kian has been internally pining for Hudson since chapter 1, but Hudson’s romantic motivations remain kind of frustratingly obscure. I mean, he was the one to initiate the breakup. What happened in his head and heart between then and now, and during the few days he and Kian spend fake-dating, that made him realise he wanted to try again? And then, when they hit the emotional nadir and Hudson accuses Kian of exploding a family event in vengeance for the breakup, this too came kind of out of left field for me. Nothing in Kian’s behaviour to Hudson or at the event itself had suggested he was harbouring bad feels and they’d literally just spent the previous night having very sexy, intimate sex and talking about their emotions (although I’m a bit confused that neither of them, in the two and a half years they’d previously spent dating, ever thought to ask the other why they cared about the thing they wanted to spend their life doing?) so … so …why was this happening? It didn’t even seem to play into any of the hints of Hudson’s insecurities as previously revealed: nothing he’d said or done over the course of the book suggested to me an uncertainty about Kian’s motivations or the reality of his feelings. I mean, he doesn’t even say sorry for dumping him out of the blue: doing something like that to someone, and then making a play to get them back, doesn’t seem like the behaviour of someone who’s secretly concerned they’re just being used or is particularly uncertain the other person still cares about them.
In any case, after all this goes down, Hudson’s sister finally seeks out Kian and explains how they were both wrong about Kian, and that Hudson is super sad now. She also encourages Kian to seek him out so they can be reconciled. And when Kian points out that Hudson hasn’t done any seeking of his own, she basically just shrugs and says ‘that’s how it is for him’. So Kian goes to find Hudson and HEA ensues. And once again we may be in personal preference territory, but this did not land for me, romantically speaking. Because essentially we have a romantic lead who dumped the protagonist with no explanation and later treated the protagonist badly yet again (on the basis, let’s not forget, of zero evidence) and, on neither occasion, took any initiative to apologise, fix it, or offer even 50% of an olive branch (unless we were meant to read the original fake-date request as an olive branch in disguise, but I don’t think it’s ever stated that Hudson was using fake dating as a ruse to get them back together). This leads to Hudson, for all he’s incredibly winning on page, feeling a bit static, in terms of personal growth or character development. At best, I guess, Kian has learned to read past Hudson’s silences and his inability to face his mistakes to the point they no longer hurt him? But at worst, we just have Kian stuck with a guy who will move back to Georgia every time they have a fight because he can’t be the one to say sorry first. And maybe this is A broader commentary on just how utterly we are enmeshed within the coils of toxic masculinity, or how sometimes you just have to accept the limitations of the person you love because you love them, but … I don’t know. I think maybe I just wanted Kian to get the same big romantic gesture as any other romcom protagonist? Not something that felt so compromised. But, in writing that, I’m concerned that I’m bringing too much of my own perspectives and preferences to the book (to say nothing of my own privilege) so please do take what I’m saying as necessarily and explicitly limited.
In any case, regardless of whether the romance arc speaks personally to you, I would still thoroughly recommend this book. It’s bold and ambitious and exceptionally clever in its exploration of the class, privilege, race, sexuality, and the complexities of identity. And in case that’s making it sound overly heavy going, it’s also just really engaging and funny and full of Star Trek references. And I mentioned the making-out-in-a-car scene, right? While not everything about this book ended up quite landing for me, I admired it very much and so very excited for whatever the author writes next.
Relevant disclaimers: nope
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
This is an incredibly stylish, charismatic romcom with a lot of potential that, for me, didn’t quite come together emotionally.
It’s got a fucking amazing premise though: it’s fake-dating meets second-chance-a-love type deal where the guy who dumped the protagonist asks him to play boyfriend to a family wedding because he hasn’t got round to telling his folks they’ve broken up. And I really cannot emphasise enough just how brilliant I find this as a way to authentically queer a set of genre tropes that are—for better or worse but undeniably—embedded in heterosexual mores (and it’s not my place to speak on this, but I suspect assumed whiteness must be a factor too). And please don’t get me wrong, I’m not criticising those genre tropes for being that way per se (romance is still predominately m/f, a greater percentile of people in the world are straight, that’s just the way it is numerically speaking) but it does create a challenge for queer writers because the experiences or fantasies that are common enough to (cis white?) heterosexuals as to be recognisable as actual tropes don’t necessarily feel that way to queer people, nor speak to their life experiences.
Faking dating is a really good at example of this because, like, ye standard fake dating set-up for an m/f romance is “I basically need a warm male body to take to a family event because we still live in a world where women are deemed to be failures if they don’t have a romantic partner and the romantic lives of women are seen as public business.” Within that context it makes complete sense for a heroine to take her best friend’s brother she’s met twice or a man she spilled coffee in in a lift: the social cache of not being single, and the fact m/f dating comes pre-enshrined in an approved cultural context, means the heroine turning up with a strange bloke at a family party will be met with enthusiasm rather than concern. By contrast, if you’re a queer person, especially if you’re a queer man, and you show up with some rando in tow you’re more likely to get a response among the lines of “why did you bring last night’s Grindr date to Cousin Ermintrude’s wedding, what the fuck is wrong with you”. Or worse, “do you have to flaunt yourself like that, this is supposed to be a family event.”
The fact of the matter of is, it’s too easy to look at the romance genre and assume that making it queer just involves sticking queer people in it. And, you know, sometimes that can work and I’m not going to knock it. But it can also be a deeply disorientating experience to queer readers because it doesn’t always feel … about us. It feels like it’s using us to speak to people who aren’t us. Because being queer (and, again, I’m sure this goes for being Black and queer but I don’t want to make assumptions on behalf of people who aren’t me) is about cultural context as much as its about personal identity. And what’s so compelling about Jackson’s writing—over and above the elements of the book that didn’t quite click for me—is the way he makes not just the tropes he’s deploying but the whole of framework of genre romance work in support of the story he’s telling: a romcom that’s funny, sexy, tender and smart in ways that feel inseparable from and fully reflective of both its queerness and its Blackness. That’s whole hell of an accomplishment and it made my queer heart sing.
Where it kind of came unstuck for me—and this may well be a me thing—is around the relationship itself. I actually really loved both characters. Kian is a nerdy, insecure eminently relatable protagonist, who is slightly adrift in his early twenties, pining for his ex, trying to break into journalism, and his interior monologue made me laugh and wince in equal measure. Like, that is a man who can deliver a zinger, very often at his own expense. Something I think the text navigates slightly less successfully is his, well, just how blunt he can be. On the one hand, it’s really satisfying to have a protagonist who says what he feels and what he thinks, but given that this can be as hurtful and problem-causing, as it can be helpful and liberating (I mean, in life as well as in fiction) it always came across as a little narratively untethered: like you never know if Kian is being a dick or saying the thing that needed saying, and sometimes it’s both, and sometimes it’s neither, and I really wanted to see that worked through as a character trait. Not that I was looking for Kian to change necessarily but given how sensitive he is to the power of words in general (he’s a journalist after all) I never got the sense that he (or the text) ever really came to terms with his tendency to use them recklessly. Of course, Kian also has anxiety so “blurting out his brain” may just as well have been related to that.
His love interest is Hudson Rivers: the wayward son of an extremely wealthy Black southern family. I felt like there was a lot less to Hudson than there was to Kian, or at least we see less because we’re never in his head. But then an on-going discussion point of the genre is the difference between books that have co-protagonists and books that are anchored mainly in one character, with the other being a subject of desire. Hudson, though, is a very successful subject of desire. He’s very much portrayed as a southern gentleman, which is not usually a fantasy I have access to because when I read m/f books with a hero like that, he tends to come across as someone who would be uncomfortable shaking my hand. So there’s something really satisfying and subversive about being presented with many of the hallmarks of that kind of hero (the old-worldly charm, the protectiveness, the secret vulnerability) embedded in a Black, openly queer character. It feels like a very “I’m in your base” move except by base I mean “genre” and “killing all your dudes” I mean “queering all your things.”
And the thing is, that when Kian and Hudson are on page together, they have a really strong connection, with great dialogue and fantastic chemistry (there’s a making-out-in-a-car scene that’s just absurdly hot), and there’s a few romantic set-pieces (Hudson declaring his feelings, for example) that absolutely hit the spot. It’s just … how do I explain … I felt I was missing many of the structural elements that give a fictional romantic relationship its broader shape beyond its component parts. Like, to me, (and, again, this is might just be about the way I personally think about romance narratives) it’s not enough to hit the beats (and now they kiss, now they argue, now they reveal parts of themselves they haven’t previously): you need the connective tissue that gives the beats their meaning for this particular couple.
To take a concrete example, before the book begins, we learn that Hudson broke up with Kian abruptly—and that this has left Kian heart-broken and lacking closure. And while Kian does allow us to see something of their previous relationship through his memories, we never actually find out what went wrong between them or why they broke up. Kian’s friend Divya (the supporting cast, by the way, are also excellent, whether it’s Kian’s aggressively successful younger brother, or Divya the ride or die friend, or Hudson’s hard-as-nails-take-no-shit grandmother) offers some insight—something about Kian nagging Hudson about his family, I don’t even know—but it’s not enough to make it feel real on the page. And, of course, I’m not saying there needed to be a deep and significant issue that split them up and squats over the text like a giant squid. Small things, or unresolved tensions, or whatever. But we never find out what they were. We never find out why Hudson did it. And they never … ever … talk about it. Apart from Hudson briefly acknowledging that he really hurt Kian and Kian agreeing that he did.
I should add that I’m aware that the book is deeply concerned with masculinity, especially as it intersects with Blackness and queerness, and that issues of emotional vulnerability feed into that. Like, one of the things we learn from Kian’s recollections of his relationship with Hudson is that Hudson is very charming and sociable, but rarely actually expresses what he really thinks or feels—which, again, contrasts in significant ways with Kian’s tendency to say what he means to the point of, arguably, saying too much. And I can maybe see why having them explicitly NOT talk about what happened was meant to show they’d both moved beyond it. But given that what little confrontation they have involves Kian storming into a taxi shouting “I’m so over you” (which is a total lie) while Hudson stands silently in front of his house in a towel, it didn’t feel like closure so much as them both being trapped within the aspects of their personalities that, to some degree, hinder their own happiness and maybe drove them apart in the first place?
I really don’t want to approach a book that has put so much thought and energy into subverting tropes, both large and small, by being “well this is how the trope works so you have do it like that” but, for me, what a second-chance-at-love type arc hinges upon is believing that Relationship Round II is meaningfully different to Relationship Round I. And if you don’t know what went wrong in Round I, it’s hard to understand what is motivating Round II, you know? I mean, it’s easy to see why both Kian and Hudson are attractive, and attractive to each other, and Kian has been internally pining for Hudson since chapter 1, but Hudson’s romantic motivations remain kind of frustratingly obscure. I mean, he was the one to initiate the breakup. What happened in his head and heart between then and now, and during the few days he and Kian spend fake-dating, that made him realise he wanted to try again? And then, when they hit the emotional nadir and Hudson accuses Kian of exploding a family event in vengeance for the breakup, this too came kind of out of left field for me. Nothing in Kian’s behaviour to Hudson or at the event itself had suggested he was harbouring bad feels and they’d literally just spent the previous night having very sexy, intimate sex and talking about their emotions (although I’m a bit confused that neither of them, in the two and a half years they’d previously spent dating, ever thought to ask the other why they cared about the thing they wanted to spend their life doing?) so … so …why was this happening? It didn’t even seem to play into any of the hints of Hudson’s insecurities as previously revealed: nothing he’d said or done over the course of the book suggested to me an uncertainty about Kian’s motivations or the reality of his feelings. I mean, he doesn’t even say sorry for dumping him out of the blue: doing something like that to someone, and then making a play to get them back, doesn’t seem like the behaviour of someone who’s secretly concerned they’re just being used or is particularly uncertain the other person still cares about them.
In any case, after all this goes down, Hudson’s sister finally seeks out Kian and explains how they were both wrong about Kian, and that Hudson is super sad now. She also encourages Kian to seek him out so they can be reconciled. And when Kian points out that Hudson hasn’t done any seeking of his own, she basically just shrugs and says ‘that’s how it is for him’. So Kian goes to find Hudson and HEA ensues. And once again we may be in personal preference territory, but this did not land for me, romantically speaking. Because essentially we have a romantic lead who dumped the protagonist with no explanation and later treated the protagonist badly yet again (on the basis, let’s not forget, of zero evidence) and, on neither occasion, took any initiative to apologise, fix it, or offer even 50% of an olive branch (unless we were meant to read the original fake-date request as an olive branch in disguise, but I don’t think it’s ever stated that Hudson was using fake dating as a ruse to get them back together). This leads to Hudson, for all he’s incredibly winning on page, feeling a bit static, in terms of personal growth or character development. At best, I guess, Kian has learned to read past Hudson’s silences and his inability to face his mistakes to the point they no longer hurt him? But at worst, we just have Kian stuck with a guy who will move back to Georgia every time they have a fight because he can’t be the one to say sorry first. And maybe this is A broader commentary on just how utterly we are enmeshed within the coils of toxic masculinity, or how sometimes you just have to accept the limitations of the person you love because you love them, but … I don’t know. I think maybe I just wanted Kian to get the same big romantic gesture as any other romcom protagonist? Not something that felt so compromised. But, in writing that, I’m concerned that I’m bringing too much of my own perspectives and preferences to the book (to say nothing of my own privilege) so please do take what I’m saying as necessarily and explicitly limited.
In any case, regardless of whether the romance arc speaks personally to you, I would still thoroughly recommend this book. It’s bold and ambitious and exceptionally clever in its exploration of the class, privilege, race, sexuality, and the complexities of identity. And in case that’s making it sound overly heavy going, it’s also just really engaging and funny and full of Star Trek references. And I mentioned the making-out-in-a-car scene, right? While not everything about this book ended up quite landing for me, I admired it very much and so very excited for whatever the author writes next.
October 20, 2021
I loved reading a black queer romance novel. This is an enjoyable read. Sexy and sweet and there is an interesting story. But the story starts with a broken up couple. But we never learn much about their relationship before the break up. It’s mystifying! The narrator, Kian, is at times insufferable. Very often rude seemingly for no reason. Hudson was a great character and a great Prince Charming but a lot of the time I wondered why he would want to get back with Kian. I think what didn’t work is making it plausible that Kian, who was devastated by the break up, would be able to trust Hudson again. And we never get a satisfying explanation for why they broke up. It felt like a lot of separate scenes without enough connective tissue. I was intrigued by the sister Olivia. And the bff Divya. The women characters were all well-written. I also love the little twist in the centerpiece of the premise, a family wedding.
I 100% recommend this book. It’s fun! There is a lot to love here. My rating is just based on my reading quirks, not the quality of the book, which is great.
I 100% recommend this book. It’s fun! There is a lot to love here. My rating is just based on my reading quirks, not the quality of the book, which is great.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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February 7, 2023I love a good second chance romance, but I’ve never really read one about exes, AND combined with fake dating which is another favourite trop of mine… count me in! I liked how this was a twist on those tropes that I’ve read time and time again. The combination of the tropes worked very well for me. But, I really would’ve loved to know why these two broke up in the first place. It was hard for me to root for their relationship when I didn’t know why it ended originally, and if maybe as much as they loved each other they would’ve been better apart. Especially with his friends telling him it was a bad idea in the beginning, it made it really hard for me to believe that they were meant to have this happily ever after. I appreciate that their relationship has its flaws, I think that was realistic and the characters clearly had chemistry. But a lot of the conflicts they had were repetitive and things that made me not believe that they should ultimately be together. I have mixed feelings really, because on the one hand they were adorable together, but on the other the class divide will always be a conflict for them since Kian is really concerned about it. There also was a bit of a lack of resolution for my tastes. But, that aside, this had some fun writing. It did read a bit on the younger end so if you’re looking to get into more mature romances this is a good one. The writing was fun and lighthearted, and Kian’s inner dialogue had some good jokes, although he could be a bit of an annoying character at times for me. Or maybe frustrating is a better word for it. I just wish he had a bit more development. There were lots of pop culture references that I enjoyed and made me laugh, so that was a fun addition. Overall, this was a really sweet and heartwarming read. I liked that it twisted different tropes on their heads, and had a cute romance once I warmed up to it even if I did have my reservations.
February 9, 2022
I feel like every romance I pick up has the fake-dating trope. And I'm not even trying.
This must be how Midas felt.
Except if Midas were also cursed by wanting something slightly different. Like if instead of everything he touched turning to gold, it turned to silver, or platinum, or bronze, or whatever other precious and semi-precious metal you can think of (because my personal knowledge is officially depleted).
Basically what I'm saying, or what I'm attempting to stretch this metaphor to say, is that I have been trying to find a romance novel I really truly really LIKE since the very start of the year of our lord 2022, and it appears that 2022 is not just similar to the years before in its apocalyptic nature, its continuing pandemic, and the fact that every month feels a hundred centuries long.
It's also determined to make me lose faith in the romance genre. And I WON'T.
Even if I have read 11 so far and not gotten past a singular 3.5 star rating.
In this case, we are at a firm 3, for reasons that may be me-exclusive.
For one thing, this book needed more of an edit. I read this as a Netgally e-ARC via Berkley, and I read a lot of Berkley e-ARCs. None of them had as little editorial support as this one, which is a bummer and I have to wonder why that is.
It results in kind of stilted and silly writing, like this passage from a restaurant:
"“The Lobster Thermidor,” Mr. Rivers says.
“The cioppino,” Mrs. Rivers selects.
“Seafood pappardelle,” Olivia chooses.
“Samundari Khazana Curry,” Hudson points.
[...] Just the four items they ordered easily cost . . . Twelve hundred dollars?!"
Noting again that I read an e-ARC and this passage is subject to change in the final version.
Also, while this is fake dating, which is one of my favorite tropes, it is also another of my LEAST favorite tropes: second chance romance.
A fun fact about me is that when I break up with someone they are dead to me. I wish them a very happy afterlife, but it is separate from me and I will never seek them out again. They are blocked on socials, their number is gone, they are done. And they have usually done something to justify this, or otherwise we have been so fully incompatible that an ideal scenario would involve us calculating the two most distant points on the globe and skedaddling to our respective new homes.
So when I read about a second chance romance, I need a LOT of explanation. Both for the above explanation and because I am nosy. This proves to be a bummer, because in this book, you get exactly zero. While we have a handful of flashbacks at our dynamic duo's first attempt, we are never really told why they broke up.
And a second chance romance without any information on the first chance and not a lot of time passing means no romance at all.
Anyway, I'm picky, it's true. But there was plenty of good stuff in this book. It's extremely funny, for one thing, and I'm going to come back to Kosoko Jackson because anytime I find an author who builds in pop culture references in a way that doesn't make me want to dramatically pass away, I cling.
Just look what happened with Mary H.K. Choi. I refuse to give up on her.
Also, the background characters (especially Olivia, Danni, and Divya, three supporting women who are very funny and brazen and cool) were fantastic.
In truth, they were way more interesting than the main two, who I did not exactly care for, but that's beside the point.
Long story short, this was my first Kosoko Jackson book, but it won't be my last!
Bottom line: Was this anything? I feel like I just wrote words for too long and called it a review.
(thanks to netgalley etc for the e-arc)
This must be how Midas felt.
Except if Midas were also cursed by wanting something slightly different. Like if instead of everything he touched turning to gold, it turned to silver, or platinum, or bronze, or whatever other precious and semi-precious metal you can think of (because my personal knowledge is officially depleted).
Basically what I'm saying, or what I'm attempting to stretch this metaphor to say, is that I have been trying to find a romance novel I really truly really LIKE since the very start of the year of our lord 2022, and it appears that 2022 is not just similar to the years before in its apocalyptic nature, its continuing pandemic, and the fact that every month feels a hundred centuries long.
It's also determined to make me lose faith in the romance genre. And I WON'T.
Even if I have read 11 so far and not gotten past a singular 3.5 star rating.
In this case, we are at a firm 3, for reasons that may be me-exclusive.
For one thing, this book needed more of an edit. I read this as a Netgally e-ARC via Berkley, and I read a lot of Berkley e-ARCs. None of them had as little editorial support as this one, which is a bummer and I have to wonder why that is.
It results in kind of stilted and silly writing, like this passage from a restaurant:
"“The Lobster Thermidor,” Mr. Rivers says.
“The cioppino,” Mrs. Rivers selects.
“Seafood pappardelle,” Olivia chooses.
“Samundari Khazana Curry,” Hudson points.
[...] Just the four items they ordered easily cost . . . Twelve hundred dollars?!"
Noting again that I read an e-ARC and this passage is subject to change in the final version.
Also, while this is fake dating, which is one of my favorite tropes, it is also another of my LEAST favorite tropes: second chance romance.
A fun fact about me is that when I break up with someone they are dead to me. I wish them a very happy afterlife, but it is separate from me and I will never seek them out again. They are blocked on socials, their number is gone, they are done. And they have usually done something to justify this, or otherwise we have been so fully incompatible that an ideal scenario would involve us calculating the two most distant points on the globe and skedaddling to our respective new homes.
So when I read about a second chance romance, I need a LOT of explanation. Both for the above explanation and because I am nosy. This proves to be a bummer, because in this book, you get exactly zero. While we have a handful of flashbacks at our dynamic duo's first attempt, we are never really told why they broke up.
And a second chance romance without any information on the first chance and not a lot of time passing means no romance at all.
Anyway, I'm picky, it's true. But there was plenty of good stuff in this book. It's extremely funny, for one thing, and I'm going to come back to Kosoko Jackson because anytime I find an author who builds in pop culture references in a way that doesn't make me want to dramatically pass away, I cling.
Just look what happened with Mary H.K. Choi. I refuse to give up on her.
Also, the background characters (especially Olivia, Danni, and Divya, three supporting women who are very funny and brazen and cool) were fantastic.
In truth, they were way more interesting than the main two, who I did not exactly care for, but that's beside the point.
Long story short, this was my first Kosoko Jackson book, but it won't be my last!
Bottom line: Was this anything? I feel like I just wrote words for too long and called it a review.
(thanks to netgalley etc for the e-arc)
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March 18, 2022dnf @34%
September 11, 2021
Well hello there!
I’M SO (NOT) OVER YOU came from a desire to see more queer Black love stories. It is my ode to pop culture, being in your early 20s and not knowing where you’re going, the struggles of growing up and the awkwardness of being authentic to yourself! It discusses being Black in America, being queer, being middle class and feeling like others are sky rocketing through the game of life and you’re struggling to keep up.
But it’s also, well, a rom com! And you can expect…
- LOTS of pop culture!
- Versatile men!
- Gayness. Lots of it y’all.
- An overload of cuteness.
- A powerful Black southern family.
- Steamy sex scenes.
- And so so much more!
This is my first rom com, and it helped me through some rough times during this Panini. I hope you find some joy and solace in it, too!
I’M SO (NOT) OVER YOU came from a desire to see more queer Black love stories. It is my ode to pop culture, being in your early 20s and not knowing where you’re going, the struggles of growing up and the awkwardness of being authentic to yourself! It discusses being Black in America, being queer, being middle class and feeling like others are sky rocketing through the game of life and you’re struggling to keep up.
But it’s also, well, a rom com! And you can expect…
- LOTS of pop culture!
- Versatile men!
- Gayness. Lots of it y’all.
- An overload of cuteness.
- A powerful Black southern family.
- Steamy sex scenes.
- And so so much more!
This is my first rom com, and it helped me through some rough times during this Panini. I hope you find some joy and solace in it, too!
March 11, 2022
2.5 stars
I was so excited for this second chance, fake dating romance and was unfortunately left disappointed. This was a second chance romance and Kian and Hudson had dated for a year and a half and literally felt like strangers. I wouldn't have believed they had ever dated if they hadn't told us in the book. Kian was so insecure around Hudson and would CONSTANTLY bring up his money. If you guys had dated before, why are you still hung up on that? And we never even learn why they broke up. We just know that Kian was devastated and Hudson now wants to fake date at a dinner for his parents. I had a really hard time liking Kian and we had his POV for the entire book. He felt very juvenile and I didn't love how he talked about Hudson. And the third act break up was more annoying to me than anything, so it was really hard for me to enjoy this book.
I was so excited for this second chance, fake dating romance and was unfortunately left disappointed. This was a second chance romance and Kian and Hudson had dated for a year and a half and literally felt like strangers. I wouldn't have believed they had ever dated if they hadn't told us in the book. Kian was so insecure around Hudson and would CONSTANTLY bring up his money. If you guys had dated before, why are you still hung up on that? And we never even learn why they broke up. We just know that Kian was devastated and Hudson now wants to fake date at a dinner for his parents. I had a really hard time liking Kian and we had his POV for the entire book. He felt very juvenile and I didn't love how he talked about Hudson. And the third act break up was more annoying to me than anything, so it was really hard for me to enjoy this book.
October 16, 2022
I’m halfway through this book but I don’t think this book is particularly well edited. I think Kian is a really frustrating main character in that though he feels distinct, he spends 80-90% of the book putting his foot in his mouth, and also often doesn’t even know what he’s just said. I have experienced this only when I’ve just woken up. He also feels like he has almost no agency in the plot because he makes every single decision under duresss or persuading from Hudson and seems to have no genuine motivation beyond “not being over his ex.” Besides that, it really feels like Hudson and Kian aren’t talking about any of the issues between them, just dancing around them. I was finding this all so frustrating that I headed over to Goodreads where I immediately discovered via Alexis’s great review that they never talk about why they broke up in the first place. It’s giving those college couples that break up every two months and immediately get back together and everyone kind of makes fun of them. Overall, YA getting better editors when. Thank you for listening.
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March 6, 2022
I needed something light while constantly watching the horrible events in Ukraine on the news. I definitely got what I wanted, I’m So Not OverYou is a light, sweet, and funny romcom. And I didn’t know beforehand that I would love fake dating exes so much!
Kian is such an endearing and talkative guy! I had to warm up to Hudson, though, a too good-looking, too rich, too perfect guy. But in the end, I fell for him, hard, and underneath this ‘too much of all’ harness hides a cute cinnamon bun, who turned out to be not so perfect after all.
I have one minor criticism. I wanted to know so badly why Hudson broke up with Kian in the first place, and I never got the answer. But you know what? It doesn’t really matter because I just curled up on the couch, even sat outside with my winter jacket on while I caught some rays of sunshine and swooned over this romcom that took my breath away.
So, if you’re up for something adorable and charming, pick up this great romcom!
Follow me on Instagram
Kian is such an endearing and talkative guy! I had to warm up to Hudson, though, a too good-looking, too rich, too perfect guy. But in the end, I fell for him, hard, and underneath this ‘too much of all’ harness hides a cute cinnamon bun, who turned out to be not so perfect after all.
I have one minor criticism. I wanted to know so badly why Hudson broke up with Kian in the first place, and I never got the answer. But you know what? It doesn’t really matter because I just curled up on the couch, even sat outside with my winter jacket on while I caught some rays of sunshine and swooned over this romcom that took my breath away.
So, if you’re up for something adorable and charming, pick up this great romcom!
Follow me on Instagram
February 25, 2022
First of all WE NEVER FIND OUT WHY THEY BROKE UP IN THE FIRST PLACE. One of my most anticipated books of the year (I even went to the book talk), and it was such a major let down for me :(. The cover is gorgeous, and the plot summary really excited me. I love that a chunk of the book took place in Georgia. But I felt as though the dialogue and ALL of the jokes (there were a LOT of jokes in the main character's internal monologue) were distracting and juvenile. So much so, that when there were sex scenes they felt out of place because it felt like I was reading YA at times. There were a lot of like comments/thoughts floating around about money, class, capitalism, but we never really got a resolution? The ending was way too tidy for the conflict at hand, and to be honest I'm not even sure I liked the main characters together. A BIG ick for me, which made me hesitant right off the bat was learning that the main character's best friend was a prosecutor. Everytime she showed up in the story after that my stomach hurt.
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May 14, 2022I hate to say it but I really did not like this book. I really wanted to love it but it was just generally uncomfortable to read.
The way the characters speak to each other is odd. They either have wildly deep conversations as soon as they're introduced ("do you love my grandson" "do you want to marry your fiancé") or they're having surface level conversations with people we're supposed to believe they're intimate with (y'all were together for over a year and never asked what made you interested in becoming a journalist?). The entire conversation where Kian compared traditional marketing strategies to slavery was weird and not the flex the book wanted us to think it was.
It's a second chance romance but we still know nothing about Kian and Hudson's first chance. We don't know why Hudson dumped him. We don't know why they love each other. They have a run in with a homophobic woman and Kian is surprised that Hudson clocks it, like Hudson is not also a gay Black man. Like they wouldn't have had those kind of encounters as two gay Black men in Boston? Even the facts of their relationship are unclear since they change through the book. In chapter 2, Kian says they were together for a year and a half but in chapter 33 Kian says they met ten months ago. The premise relies on us believing in their current relationship but that's impossible to do without context for their previous one.
The book constantly contradicts itself that way. Wallace (who's existence is unnecessary in an already lengthy book) goes from being a lawyer Divya met on a case to her coworker in the first half, only to claim to have patients in the second half. Is he a doctor now? I'm not sure if this is an editing issue or my own reading comprehension? But it was distracting.
Ultimately I am just left with like 50 questions
Does Hudson have any friends?
Why did Hudson dump Kian in the first place?
How did Olivia know their relationship was fake?
Where'd the cool grandma go?
Why did no one care to check in on Kian after he was almost assaulted?
Why is Kian always the one apologizing when Hudson is terrible to him?
What happened on that trip home that Hudson is suddenly a better person now and also why is that shoved into the epilogue? Well, so was Kian's character development so I guess that tracks.
All in all this was disappointing, considering how much I was looking forward to this book.
The way the characters speak to each other is odd. They either have wildly deep conversations as soon as they're introduced ("do you love my grandson" "do you want to marry your fiancé") or they're having surface level conversations with people we're supposed to believe they're intimate with (y'all were together for over a year and never asked what made you interested in becoming a journalist?). The entire conversation where Kian compared traditional marketing strategies to slavery was weird and not the flex the book wanted us to think it was.
It's a second chance romance but we still know nothing about Kian and Hudson's first chance. We don't know why Hudson dumped him. We don't know why they love each other. They have a run in with a homophobic woman and Kian is surprised that Hudson clocks it, like Hudson is not also a gay Black man. Like they wouldn't have had those kind of encounters as two gay Black men in Boston? Even the facts of their relationship are unclear since they change through the book. In chapter 2, Kian says they were together for a year and a half but in chapter 33 Kian says they met ten months ago. The premise relies on us believing in their current relationship but that's impossible to do without context for their previous one.
The book constantly contradicts itself that way. Wallace (who's existence is unnecessary in an already lengthy book) goes from being a lawyer Divya met on a case to her coworker in the first half, only to claim to have patients in the second half. Is he a doctor now? I'm not sure if this is an editing issue or my own reading comprehension? But it was distracting.
Ultimately I am just left with like 50 questions
Does Hudson have any friends?
Why did Hudson dump Kian in the first place?
How did Olivia know their relationship was fake?
Where'd the cool grandma go?
Why did no one care to check in on Kian after he was almost assaulted?
Why is Kian always the one apologizing when Hudson is terrible to him?
What happened on that trip home that Hudson is suddenly a better person now and also why is that shoved into the epilogue? Well, so was Kian's character development so I guess that tracks.
All in all this was disappointing, considering how much I was looking forward to this book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 28, 2022
Is it really romance if your love interest breaks your heart twice, never apologizes, and you're the one doing all the emotional labor?
Everything Alexis Hall says is 100% on-point, but he says it much nicer than I would.
Additionally, there are glaring continuity issues:
— Kian goes on a date with a divorce attorney at the beginning of the book; at the end of the book, that same man is now a doctor working at a hospital.
— Kian's best friend is a prosecutor, who has "meetings with clients" and works at the same "firm" as the aforementioned divorce attorney. This is not possible.
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Everything Alexis Hall says is 100% on-point, but he says it much nicer than I would.
Additionally, there are glaring continuity issues:
— Kian goes on a date with a divorce attorney at the beginning of the book; at the end of the book, that same man is now a doctor working at a hospital.
— Kian's best friend is a prosecutor, who has "meetings with clients" and works at the same "firm" as the aforementioned divorce attorney. This is not possible.
📌 . Blog | Review Database | Twitter | Instagram | Goodreads
January 23, 2022
With beautifully drawn themes of family ties, foundational friendships, and the importance of choosing a love that makes us better, stronger, and happier, here is the queer rom com the genre has been waiting years for! As tender and unflinching as it is uproarious and joyful, Kosoko Jackson’s I’m So (Not) Over You is, quite simply—a spectacularly satisfying read.
February 3, 2022
Petition for Kosoko Jackson to please write more romcoms!
This book combines two of my current favourite tropes; fake dating and second chance romance, and it was one of the best romcoms I've read in a while. Especially because it has a really distinctive and genuinely funny main character, who I know will stay with me for a long time.
It did take me a little while to get invested in the romance. One downside of the book to me was that I felt like we didn't get to know Hudson really well. Basically what we know of their relationship is that Hudson stands up for Kian in several instances, and Kian (understandably) seems to have a thing for that. I would have loved to see a little more of what initially brought them together, but even so, I did feel really invested in the romance towards the end.
This book combines two of my current favourite tropes; fake dating and second chance romance, and it was one of the best romcoms I've read in a while. Especially because it has a really distinctive and genuinely funny main character, who I know will stay with me for a long time.
It did take me a little while to get invested in the romance. One downside of the book to me was that I felt like we didn't get to know Hudson really well. Basically what we know of their relationship is that Hudson stands up for Kian in several instances, and Kian (understandably) seems to have a thing for that. I would have loved to see a little more of what initially brought them together, but even so, I did feel really invested in the romance towards the end.
April 12, 2022
3.5 stars! I was enjoying this so much, but then it got to a point where Hudson got on my nerves because it felt like he didn't put as much effort into the romance as much as Kian. I know everyone got annoyed by Kian, but it was the other way around for me lol. We also weirdly never got a reason why these two broke up in the first place??
January 6, 2022
I had a good time with Kosoko Jackson's I'm So (Not) Over You. He has funny, dry writing voice, and I laughed out loud at several sections of this book. There was some excellent banter in here, the steamy scenes were hot, and the novel was a fun take on the fake dating trope.
I think where this story went a little bit haywire was in the editing, and I don't necessarily put that all on Jackson. I'm not talking about line edits or typos; there were just a few big, obvious questions that never got answered. We never really hear anything about Kian and Hudson's actual relationship prior to the book's events, nor do we ever get the full story of why they broke up. It's difficult for me to fully invest in a second-chance romance when you don't have context for what went wrong during the first chance. (It reminds me of issues I had reading Sarah Hogle's debut You Deserve Each Other a few years ago!)
That said, I'm intrigued to see what Kosoko Jackson publishes next.
CW: Sexual harassment, racism
I think where this story went a little bit haywire was in the editing, and I don't necessarily put that all on Jackson. I'm not talking about line edits or typos; there were just a few big, obvious questions that never got answered. We never really hear anything about Kian and Hudson's actual relationship prior to the book's events, nor do we ever get the full story of why they broke up. It's difficult for me to fully invest in a second-chance romance when you don't have context for what went wrong during the first chance. (It reminds me of issues I had reading Sarah Hogle's debut You Deserve Each Other a few years ago!)
That said, I'm intrigued to see what Kosoko Jackson publishes next.
CW: Sexual harassment, racism
May 19, 2023
Emotionally, I loved this read. Editorially, I wished I had witnessed a cohesive narrative thread. Come for the cute vibes!
Writing voice: ★★★
Narrative thread: ★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★
I'm So (Not) Over You is the kind of read that I love picking up when I'm in the mood for a light romance. Give me some tropes—fake dating, exes with A Past, shenanigans—and some light angst and quippy dialogue, and I'm a happy camper.
Journalist Kian Andrews is having an interesting year. He's looking for work in his field, post graduation, and he's currently recovering from a bad break up. He's in that in-between place that many early/mid-20s people find themselves in. It's a stressful time.
The LAST thing Kian needs is a call from his ex, the one and only Hudson Rivers.
Rich, handsome, and suave, Hudson dumped Kian a few months ago and seemingly moved on just fine. Kian....didn't. So when Hudson wants to meet one last time, Kian has no idea what to expect and is guarded against more pain.
But Hudson wants... to fake date? Turns out Hudson never told his family they broke up, and he needs Kian to hold up the lie for a family gathering.
Cute the shenanigans.
NOW. In full transparency, I really loved this reading experience. The dialogue, scenes, and writing were all my type of thing and I flew through this entire book in one evening.
However. I gotta talk about it.
I'm not going to call is a SPOILER, because I don't think it is one myself, but for those who like to keep things vague.. MILD SPOILER BELOW!
The point where this novel lost me was actually toward the end—when I realized that we were never going to find out exactly what had happened before and WHY their breakup happened in the first place. We literally are never told the reason/scenario. Which made Kian's reactions and occasional harshness/rudeness even harder to understand. I wanted to be on Kian's side as our main character, but I didn't know if his reactions had any justifications. I didn't know the context. And it never came to us later in the story.
So that was hard. If we'd had that narrative thread—which was arguably the main point of the entire novel!—tied up, I would have easily rated this romance higher.
But, regardless of that sticking point, I still thought this was a very cute and fun rom-com for those of us who enjoy second chance, fake dating, and exes tropes in our romance.
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Writing voice: ★★★
Narrative thread: ★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★
I'm So (Not) Over You is the kind of read that I love picking up when I'm in the mood for a light romance. Give me some tropes—fake dating, exes with A Past, shenanigans—and some light angst and quippy dialogue, and I'm a happy camper.
Journalist Kian Andrews is having an interesting year. He's looking for work in his field, post graduation, and he's currently recovering from a bad break up. He's in that in-between place that many early/mid-20s people find themselves in. It's a stressful time.
The LAST thing Kian needs is a call from his ex, the one and only Hudson Rivers.
Rich, handsome, and suave, Hudson dumped Kian a few months ago and seemingly moved on just fine. Kian....didn't. So when Hudson wants to meet one last time, Kian has no idea what to expect and is guarded against more pain.
But Hudson wants... to fake date? Turns out Hudson never told his family they broke up, and he needs Kian to hold up the lie for a family gathering.
Cute the shenanigans.
NOW. In full transparency, I really loved this reading experience. The dialogue, scenes, and writing were all my type of thing and I flew through this entire book in one evening.
However. I gotta talk about it.
I'm not going to call is a SPOILER, because I don't think it is one myself, but for those who like to keep things vague.. MILD SPOILER BELOW!
The point where this novel lost me was actually toward the end—when I realized that we were never going to find out exactly what had happened before and WHY their breakup happened in the first place. We literally are never told the reason/scenario. Which made Kian's reactions and occasional harshness/rudeness even harder to understand. I wanted to be on Kian's side as our main character, but I didn't know if his reactions had any justifications. I didn't know the context. And it never came to us later in the story.
So that was hard. If we'd had that narrative thread—which was arguably the main point of the entire novel!—tied up, I would have easily rated this romance higher.
But, regardless of that sticking point, I still thought this was a very cute and fun rom-com for those of us who enjoy second chance, fake dating, and exes tropes in our romance.
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February 20, 2022
* i was given an advanced copy of this book in exchange for a honest review * this book was one of my most anticipated reads of the year sadly it didn’t live up to my expectations. I honestly didn’t like either characters for various reasons. I also hate how this whole book is centered around them breaking up, but we never figured out why they broke up in the first place. I didn’t believe the chemistry between these too and i just felt like i was asking more questions as i was reading than anything else.
dnf
March 14, 2022DNF 120 pages in. I was really excited when I started reading Jackson's first adult rom com, a fake dating and a second chance romance about queer Black male characters, written by a queer black male writer. An embarrassing gap in the publishing field, that is, a gap that romance readers both queer and straight are eager to see filled. It's also got a narrator who is funny as fuck. Kian's voice pops off the page, entertaining, distinctive, often caustic; it engaged me immediately, and I was eager to read more.
But as the story went on, I found the book depended too much on that voice, focusing far too much on Kian's jokes and pop culture references and digressive asides at the expense of developing a plot or on even explaining what had happened to Kian and Hudson in their first-go round at romance. I kept waiting, and waiting, for the two characters to engage with one another, for things to happen to them or because of them, for any small sign of understanding at all why they were boyfriends for a year and a half, and what led Hudson to break up with Kian. The pleasure of a second chance romance lies in seeing how the characters will do it differently, better, the second time round; if you don't know what their first time round was like, or why it went bad, a lot of the pleasure ends up missing.
When I started skimming paragraphs, then skipping pages, I decided to check out other Goodreads reviews to see if things got better. But it seems they don't, which made me decide to DNF and return this one to the library.
But as the story went on, I found the book depended too much on that voice, focusing far too much on Kian's jokes and pop culture references and digressive asides at the expense of developing a plot or on even explaining what had happened to Kian and Hudson in their first-go round at romance. I kept waiting, and waiting, for the two characters to engage with one another, for things to happen to them or because of them, for any small sign of understanding at all why they were boyfriends for a year and a half, and what led Hudson to break up with Kian. The pleasure of a second chance romance lies in seeing how the characters will do it differently, better, the second time round; if you don't know what their first time round was like, or why it went bad, a lot of the pleasure ends up missing.
When I started skimming paragraphs, then skipping pages, I decided to check out other Goodreads reviews to see if things got better. But it seems they don't, which made me decide to DNF and return this one to the library.
March 3, 2022
I believe this is Kosoko Jackson's first novel. Rather it is or isn't...what he has written is a charming, sweet, love story between two guys from such far-apart economical classes they wouldn't be able to see the shore if they tried...but in spite of this there was always love. I didn't really understand the reasoning for the breakup, except that it gave backbone for the story that took place to build on. Mr. Jackson takes the reader on one fantastic journey following these two men through the "on again, off again" relationship and the decisions that they had to make that would affect them for the remainder of their lives. I loved both Kian and Hudson. I hated Hudson's sister and what Kian went through. If this is a first novel for Kosoko Jackson...he has hit the nail on the head with this one. It's going to a tough act for him to follow...but hey, Mr. jackson...bring it on!
October 4, 2022
2.0 stars
This story follows Kian and Hudson - Kian being our narrator, and Hudson being the ex-boyfriend that Kian is both hurting and pining over. In the first chapter, we learn that Hudson has invited Kian to coffee for some reason. Said reason being that Hudson needs Kian to pretend to still be his boyfriend because he never got around to telling his family that they broke up and they expect Kian to attend an upcoming family dinner and wedding. Kian agrees - half because Hudson promises him a connection for a job prospect and half because he's still in love with Hudson. Thus ensues a fake dating - that quickly turns real - second chance rom-com.
While I really enjoyed reading an own-voices, black and queer romance (and am thrilled that books like this exist at all), this story just didn't live up to my expectations. For one, I found the writing really difficult to get into. It's filled with needless metaphors, grating pop-culture references, and baffling, multiple page-long tangents. The writing was stilted and had very little flow and made it very difficult for me to get through the story. I honestly think this would have been a 3.5 star story had it been written in a different style.
But, that's not to say the writing was the only issue I had. One of the major issues I had was simply believing that these two characters had romantic feelings for one another or were in a relationship that would work long term. As mentioned, this is a second-chance romance, so we start the story with the characters having been broken up for a few months. But... we never learn why they broke up in the first place. That, on top of the stupid as heck third-act conflict, made it very unbelievable that these two characters would be able to get back together for any significant length of time. They literally never talked about the issues that made them break up in the first place, and didn't really address the issues that made them break up a second time - simply pleading with one another for a THIRD!! chance. If they can't discuss their issues and how they'll work through them when they inevitably appear next time, how can we the reader believe in their relationship?
Overall, I was left feeling very unsatisfied by this book. If I wasn't reading it for a (secret) reason, I most likely would have DNF'd it. This I think was my third attempt to actually read the book - it never truly grabbed my interest. I do think Jackson has potential, so I would be interested to read their next book to see if it's improved. But, this one was a no from me.
This story follows Kian and Hudson - Kian being our narrator, and Hudson being the ex-boyfriend that Kian is both hurting and pining over. In the first chapter, we learn that Hudson has invited Kian to coffee for some reason. Said reason being that Hudson needs Kian to pretend to still be his boyfriend because he never got around to telling his family that they broke up and they expect Kian to attend an upcoming family dinner and wedding. Kian agrees - half because Hudson promises him a connection for a job prospect and half because he's still in love with Hudson. Thus ensues a fake dating - that quickly turns real - second chance rom-com.
While I really enjoyed reading an own-voices, black and queer romance (and am thrilled that books like this exist at all), this story just didn't live up to my expectations. For one, I found the writing really difficult to get into. It's filled with needless metaphors, grating pop-culture references, and baffling, multiple page-long tangents. The writing was stilted and had very little flow and made it very difficult for me to get through the story. I honestly think this would have been a 3.5 star story had it been written in a different style.
But, that's not to say the writing was the only issue I had. One of the major issues I had was simply believing that these two characters had romantic feelings for one another or were in a relationship that would work long term. As mentioned, this is a second-chance romance, so we start the story with the characters having been broken up for a few months. But... we never learn why they broke up in the first place. That, on top of the stupid as heck third-act conflict, made it very unbelievable that these two characters would be able to get back together for any significant length of time. They literally never talked about the issues that made them break up in the first place, and didn't really address the issues that made them break up a second time - simply pleading with one another for a THIRD!! chance. If they can't discuss their issues and how they'll work through them when they inevitably appear next time, how can we the reader believe in their relationship?
Overall, I was left feeling very unsatisfied by this book. If I wasn't reading it for a (secret) reason, I most likely would have DNF'd it. This I think was my third attempt to actually read the book - it never truly grabbed my interest. I do think Jackson has potential, so I would be interested to read their next book to see if it's improved. But, this one was a no from me.
April 13, 2022
All the little inconsistencies in this book drove me UP THE WALL! First they’d been together a year and a half before they broke up, then later it says “ten months ago, just before I’d met Hudson”???? The guy he gets set up with is introduced as a lawyer, then later he’s a doctor??? I felt like I was having an aneurysm and kept having to go back to check if I was missing something (I wasn’t)
Also, I just needed a LOT more characterization and context. WHY DID THEY BREAK UP THE FIRST TIME. In the argument scenes they were always snapping at each other like “why can’t you ever just tell the truth?!” With NOTHING in the plot to back that characterization up. Ugh. I shouldn’t have even finished this book bc it bothered me so much from that standpoint, but I wanted to read a sweet queer story and it was that, to an extent. Just not much.
Also, I just needed a LOT more characterization and context. WHY DID THEY BREAK UP THE FIRST TIME. In the argument scenes they were always snapping at each other like “why can’t you ever just tell the truth?!” With NOTHING in the plot to back that characterization up. Ugh. I shouldn’t have even finished this book bc it bothered me so much from that standpoint, but I wanted to read a sweet queer story and it was that, to an extent. Just not much.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 24, 2022
This was an absolute delight - so tropey and fun (second chance! Fake relationship! Only one bed!) with just enough angst. This was single POV and the primary hero, Kian, was smart and sharply funny.
Want to read
September 26, 2020fake dating between exes and it's Adult? hell yeah count me in
May 25, 2022
These two characters for real shouldn’t have ended up together.
December 27, 2021
An ARC of this book was provided by the publisher via Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.
I think I needed more from this second-chance romance, not gonna lie. The book starts with Hudson and Kian reconnecting after months apart because Hudson needs a favor: Kian has to pretend to still be his boyfriend in front of Hudson's whole family. I didn't love how Kian was so willing to help him, and that's why I was then happy to see that he was going to get something out of this pact they formed. Unfortunately in the end we all know how this horribly turned out.
What baffled me is Hudson and Kian's relationship before the start of this novel. We know nothing about it apart from how they met basically. I wanted more backstory, especially on why they broke up, we only know that Hudson did it, but we are never given context about this. Moreover, in the book there's a lot of talk about Hudson's family and his wealth which is understandable since Kian is experiencing it first hand at Hudson's family home in Georgia, but it's also a bit weird since these are two people who were in a relationship in the past and they talk like they never knew things about each other.
There are also aspects of the novel I appreciated though. I loved reading the thoughts on wealth from Kian's point of view, I think they made a lot of sense and they were definitely good food for thought. I also enjoyed reading about Kian and Hudson, I believe they worked quite well as a couple and I liked seeing them spend time together.
Overall it was an enjoyable romance book, but I must say I was expecting more from it.
I think I needed more from this second-chance romance, not gonna lie. The book starts with Hudson and Kian reconnecting after months apart because Hudson needs a favor: Kian has to pretend to still be his boyfriend in front of Hudson's whole family. I didn't love how Kian was so willing to help him, and that's why I was then happy to see that he was going to get something out of this pact they formed. Unfortunately in the end we all know how this horribly turned out.
What baffled me is Hudson and Kian's relationship before the start of this novel. We know nothing about it apart from how they met basically. I wanted more backstory, especially on why they broke up, we only know that Hudson did it, but we are never given context about this. Moreover, in the book there's a lot of talk about Hudson's family and his wealth which is understandable since Kian is experiencing it first hand at Hudson's family home in Georgia, but it's also a bit weird since these are two people who were in a relationship in the past and they talk like they never knew things about each other.
There are also aspects of the novel I appreciated though. I loved reading the thoughts on wealth from Kian's point of view, I think they made a lot of sense and they were definitely good food for thought. I also enjoyed reading about Kian and Hudson, I believe they worked quite well as a couple and I liked seeing them spend time together.
Overall it was an enjoyable romance book, but I must say I was expecting more from it.
October 17, 2022
3 stars.
This was fun! Its fake-dating and second chance, two romance tropes I enjoy reading a lot, but I felt that there were still several areas the book could have been better. For starters, I didn't quite get the chemistry between the characters. Their romance also seemed inconsistent in some areas, like if they had dated for 2 years before, why was the MC still so uncomfortable about the LI's wealth?
We also don't get any reason for why these characters split up in the first place, which I personally feel is important in a second-chance romance, as without that, I don't get why I'm supposed to root for this couple to get back together.
Despite though, I thought this book was entertaining and a fun read. I might check out more by this author.
Content/ Trigger Warnings- Sexual content, Homophobia, Racism, Sexual harassment, Classism, Violence, Alcoholism, Blood
Note- I have tried to include all the content warnings that I noticed, but there is no guarantee that I haven’t missed something.
Review written on 17th October, 2022.
Storygraph. Spotify. Youtube. Pinterest. Twitter. Instagram. Linktree.
DISCLAIMER-All opinions on books I’ve read and reviewed are my own, and are with no intention to offend anyone. If you feel offended by my reviews, let me know how I can fix it.
How I Rate-
1 star- Hardly liked anything/was disappointed
2 star- Had potential but did not deliver/was disappointed
3 stars- Was ok but could have been better/was average/Enjoyed a lot but something was missing
4 stars- Loved a lot but something was missing
5 stars- Loved it/new favourite
This was fun! Its fake-dating and second chance, two romance tropes I enjoy reading a lot, but I felt that there were still several areas the book could have been better. For starters, I didn't quite get the chemistry between the characters. Their romance also seemed inconsistent in some areas, like if they had dated for 2 years before, why was the MC still so uncomfortable about the LI's wealth?
We also don't get any reason for why these characters split up in the first place, which I personally feel is important in a second-chance romance, as without that, I don't get why I'm supposed to root for this couple to get back together.
Despite though, I thought this book was entertaining and a fun read. I might check out more by this author.
Content/ Trigger Warnings- Sexual content, Homophobia, Racism, Sexual harassment, Classism, Violence, Alcoholism, Blood
Note- I have tried to include all the content warnings that I noticed, but there is no guarantee that I haven’t missed something.
Review written on 17th October, 2022.
Storygraph. Spotify. Youtube. Pinterest. Twitter. Instagram. Linktree.
DISCLAIMER-All opinions on books I’ve read and reviewed are my own, and are with no intention to offend anyone. If you feel offended by my reviews, let me know how I can fix it.
How I Rate-
1 star- Hardly liked anything/was disappointed
2 star- Had potential but did not deliver/was disappointed
3 stars- Was ok but could have been better/was average/Enjoyed a lot but something was missing
4 stars- Loved a lot but something was missing
5 stars- Loved it/new favourite
Read
March 16, 2022I legit don’t know how to rate this book.
So it has things I loved and things I hated.
Love: amazing writing, great characters, and solid pacing.
Hate: the tropes. Second chance romance and fake dating.
Honestly if you’re a fan of these tropes then PLEASE READ THIS. I am not a fan of these tropes, yet I still was able to finish the book and for the most part enjoy it.
There were a few things missing that I thought could tie it up better. I wanted to know why they broke up in the first place. Without that key info I couldn’t believe the second chance. Also the fake dating just seemed weird to me. VERY WEIRD. But again, it’s a trope I don’t like.
And before you ask “oh why read a book with tropes you don’t like? Blah blah blah”
Im trying to get out of my comfort zone and read more adult gay romances and this was the first ownvoices one I found.
So yes, mixed feelings, but the author has proved his skills and I will be going on to buy his other works because he is a fabulous writer.
The end.
So it has things I loved and things I hated.
Love: amazing writing, great characters, and solid pacing.
Hate: the tropes. Second chance romance and fake dating.
Honestly if you’re a fan of these tropes then PLEASE READ THIS. I am not a fan of these tropes, yet I still was able to finish the book and for the most part enjoy it.
There were a few things missing that I thought could tie it up better. I wanted to know why they broke up in the first place. Without that key info I couldn’t believe the second chance. Also the fake dating just seemed weird to me. VERY WEIRD. But again, it’s a trope I don’t like.
And before you ask “oh why read a book with tropes you don’t like? Blah blah blah”
Im trying to get out of my comfort zone and read more adult gay romances and this was the first ownvoices one I found.
So yes, mixed feelings, but the author has proved his skills and I will be going on to buy his other works because he is a fabulous writer.
The end.
November 10, 2022
Fake boyfriends don’t always equal fake feelings.
“The first rule, and only rule, of getting over your ex is not to answer your ex’s messages.”
Kian knows this, but when his ex-boyfriend Hudson calls, he still can’t resist. And when they get together, he can’t believe Hudson says he wants to get back together with Kian…for a few days, tops. It seems that Hudson never told his parents that he and Kian broke up, and they’re coming to town.
Of course, Kian agrees to help Hudson, but it’s not long before their scheme gets a little more complicated, and he finds himself invited to be Hudson’s guest at a fancy wedding. It’s not all selflessness on Kian’s part—he’s hoping he can network with some media bigwigs, which might be the jumpstart his journalism career needs.
The more they pretend, the more they realize maybe their feelings run deeper than that. But will they run into the same problems they did the last time, or have they changed? And are they willing to try again or are they better off just walking away?
I love fake dating and second-chance romances, so this was a fun read. The banter between the characters is so fun and sexy, and while I didn’t necessarily love everything the characters did, I really rooted for them. It’s not often you get a Black Queer love story, so that was a definite plus.
See all of my reviews at itseithersadnessoreuphoria.blogspot.com.
Follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/getbookedwithlarry/.
“The first rule, and only rule, of getting over your ex is not to answer your ex’s messages.”
Kian knows this, but when his ex-boyfriend Hudson calls, he still can’t resist. And when they get together, he can’t believe Hudson says he wants to get back together with Kian…for a few days, tops. It seems that Hudson never told his parents that he and Kian broke up, and they’re coming to town.
Of course, Kian agrees to help Hudson, but it’s not long before their scheme gets a little more complicated, and he finds himself invited to be Hudson’s guest at a fancy wedding. It’s not all selflessness on Kian’s part—he’s hoping he can network with some media bigwigs, which might be the jumpstart his journalism career needs.
The more they pretend, the more they realize maybe their feelings run deeper than that. But will they run into the same problems they did the last time, or have they changed? And are they willing to try again or are they better off just walking away?
I love fake dating and second-chance romances, so this was a fun read. The banter between the characters is so fun and sexy, and while I didn’t necessarily love everything the characters did, I really rooted for them. It’s not often you get a Black Queer love story, so that was a definite plus.
See all of my reviews at itseithersadnessoreuphoria.blogspot.com.
Follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/getbookedwithlarry/.
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