This story reminded me of a parrot joke.
This guy got a new parrot who kept cursing and saying rude things to everybody. The guy begged, pleaded, screamed and threatened, but nothing helped. One day, from pure frustration, the guy shoved the parrot into the fridge and left him there for a few minutes. When he opened the door, the parrot walked out calmly and said: “I apologize for my earlier behaviour and ask your forgiveness for the way I have been acting. From now on, I will make an effort to be a better pet to you. And, may I ask, what did the chicken do that’s in there?”
Psychology can be so effective. However, this story went the other way...
Rayne, I know you are going to read this, and I want to ask you to show this to your husband, because I have some unsolicited advice for him.
Mr. Havok, sir, I do not know if you read your wife’s stories, so you should know this by now, but I still feel the need to say it, if only to make me feel like I did what I could. While your wife is the salt of the earth and I am about 99% certain she is the parent who brings the freshly baked scones to the PTA meetings, just make sure that the next time you get home, and she greets you by your first name (as opposed to your pet name), to get in your car, drive to the nearest motel and phone her from there to find out what you did. Her imagination is admirable, in the way that a good brain-splatter analyst might be, but just don’t fuck with them. Or else...
I love me some revenge stories, but this one left me with a lump in my throat like a reverse haemorrhoid.
5 stars for doing the absolute worst thing I have ever read to a man’s junk.
Not recommended for people with good taste...