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The Next Time You See Me I'll Probably Be Dead
The Next Time You See Me I’ll Probably Be Dead is a collection of short stories by author C.V. Hunt. A cursed mailbox, something from the depths of the ocean, a dating app encounter gone very wrong, an urban legend come to life, a haunted attraction that isn’t what it seems, and a musician’s first performance that may be their last are what you’ll encounter in this collection.Swipe LeftGates of HellEndless FleshThe MailboxIt Came From the SeaThe Haunted House of Obsolescence
85 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 25, 2021
9 people are currently reading
83 people want to read
About the author
C.V. Hunt
36 books592 followersC.V. Hunt lives in Yellow Springs, Ohio, is the owner of Grindhouse Press, and writes unpopular fiction.
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
January 31, 2022
C.V. Hunt has put together a fun, creepy, and weird collection of short stories with THE NEXT TIME YOU SEE ME I'LL PROBABLY BE DEAD. The opening story about a spooky Halloween store with 90s tech was really wonderful and set the tone for me to devour the rest of this collection. We get some possessed/haunted mailbox horror, vaginal terror, online dating gone awry, and more!
Each story had a moment that made me thankful I am comfortable, safe, happy, and healthy on my own couch in my locked house with a cup of tea. I would love to see some of these extended to a longer story/novella/novel. And that is when I know a short story works for me: when I can appreciate and love the story for what it is but a piece of me wants to be reading on it even more.
Hunt's collection here is so fun and I think everyone will find more than one story they love!
Each story had a moment that made me thankful I am comfortable, safe, happy, and healthy on my own couch in my locked house with a cup of tea. I would love to see some of these extended to a longer story/novella/novel. And that is when I know a short story works for me: when I can appreciate and love the story for what it is but a piece of me wants to be reading on it even more.
Hunt's collection here is so fun and I think everyone will find more than one story they love!
July 22, 2024
Okay, I absolutely LOVED this collection of short stories. I binge read this and enjoyed every story. Each story was so different from one another and made it a wonderful experience not knowing what to expect on the next page. This is easily in my top 5 favorite short story collections. If you love horror and don’t mind some splatter then you definitely need to check this collection out. I had a great time!
The Haunted House of Obsolescence
I REALLY enjoyed this story. A 90’s Halloween Store with all the spookiness and nostalgia put me right in the feels. A group of friends realize a little too late that this is a very REAL haunted house. 😬
The Mailbox
When Elijah’s parents get divorced, he and his mother move out of the house. Elijah’s grandparents have an old house that he and his mother move into together. Elijah’s upset, as any young boy would be. He decides to write a letter to his friend and this is when Elijah starts to notice something odd about the mailbox. His grandmother has always said it’s cursed after all…
This was another highly enjoyable read for me. I’m all about spooky stories and possessed objects and a huge bonus in my book!
It Came From the Sea
Sea horror is one of my absolute favorites to read! When Theresa takes her girlfriend, Jessie, on her sailboat things turn for the worse whenever Theresa decides to take a dip in the water. When she gets back on the boat she isn’t the same person she was before. 😳
Swipe Left
Jon meets his dating app match at a bar. The conversation is very dull and they’re both struggling to keep it going. They’re both here for a one night stand and it’s painfully obvious. Finally, she decides to make a move and suggest they go to her house for the night. However, once Jon gets inside her starts to feel uneasy and then his drink confirms his suspicions. 😵💫
This story was disturbing and eerie af. This is probably going to be my favorite of the collection for sure just because of how morbidly unhinged it is.
Gates of Hell
A video streamer and his gf go exploring one of the portals to the “gates of hell.” Brian goes exploring sites of popular Urban Legends for his video channel. His girlfriend starts to feel sick when they’re inside this cave and things get heated up rather quickly and blood is to be shed. 🫠
I’m a huge fan of Urban Legends and this tale didn’t disappoint. Gentlemen, you might cringe during this one 🤭😮💨
Endless Flesh
An EDM cult? Alrighty then. This one sure was interesting and I can’t say that I’ve ever read anything similar to this one.
The Haunted House of Obsolescence
I REALLY enjoyed this story. A 90’s Halloween Store with all the spookiness and nostalgia put me right in the feels. A group of friends realize a little too late that this is a very REAL haunted house. 😬
The Mailbox
When Elijah’s parents get divorced, he and his mother move out of the house. Elijah’s grandparents have an old house that he and his mother move into together. Elijah’s upset, as any young boy would be. He decides to write a letter to his friend and this is when Elijah starts to notice something odd about the mailbox. His grandmother has always said it’s cursed after all…
This was another highly enjoyable read for me. I’m all about spooky stories and possessed objects and a huge bonus in my book!
It Came From the Sea
Sea horror is one of my absolute favorites to read! When Theresa takes her girlfriend, Jessie, on her sailboat things turn for the worse whenever Theresa decides to take a dip in the water. When she gets back on the boat she isn’t the same person she was before. 😳
Swipe Left
Jon meets his dating app match at a bar. The conversation is very dull and they’re both struggling to keep it going. They’re both here for a one night stand and it’s painfully obvious. Finally, she decides to make a move and suggest they go to her house for the night. However, once Jon gets inside her starts to feel uneasy and then his drink confirms his suspicions. 😵💫
This story was disturbing and eerie af. This is probably going to be my favorite of the collection for sure just because of how morbidly unhinged it is.
Gates of Hell
A video streamer and his gf go exploring one of the portals to the “gates of hell.” Brian goes exploring sites of popular Urban Legends for his video channel. His girlfriend starts to feel sick when they’re inside this cave and things get heated up rather quickly and blood is to be shed. 🫠
I’m a huge fan of Urban Legends and this tale didn’t disappoint. Gentlemen, you might cringe during this one 🤭😮💨
Endless Flesh
An EDM cult? Alrighty then. This one sure was interesting and I can’t say that I’ve ever read anything similar to this one.
October 14, 2021
If you're looking for something weird, creepy, and obscure. This book is for you.
A collection of short horror stories with very odd topics and a lot of... Creativity? I actually liked the first two short stories. They were interesting and freaky in their own ways. The remainder of the stories were just downright weird. Which, I'm sure is the whole idea. But, it wasn't really my jam. There was a little too much of an obsession with the concept of the possessed, haunted, or demonic monster female genitalia. Which, can be a fine horror story, sure. But it gets old and overplayed as it's a topic of more than 2 of these stories. Just told in different ways.
The horror mostly comes from the imagery here. This can be appreciated, but this book kind of left me feeling eerily similar to a small character in the book. In the sense where, when I finished it I was kind of just sitting there for a moment like, "O....K...."
My advice to you is... Read it! If you like weird stuff like that. Or don't! I don't think I will again. But, it was worth a try.
A collection of short horror stories with very odd topics and a lot of... Creativity? I actually liked the first two short stories. They were interesting and freaky in their own ways. The remainder of the stories were just downright weird. Which, I'm sure is the whole idea. But, it wasn't really my jam. There was a little too much of an obsession with the concept of the possessed, haunted, or demonic monster female genitalia. Which, can be a fine horror story, sure. But it gets old and overplayed as it's a topic of more than 2 of these stories. Just told in different ways.
The horror mostly comes from the imagery here. This can be appreciated, but this book kind of left me feeling eerily similar to a small character in the book. In the sense where, when I finished it I was kind of just sitting there for a moment like, "O....K...."
My advice to you is... Read it! If you like weird stuff like that. Or don't! I don't think I will again. But, it was worth a try.
May 30, 2022
A perfect sampling of what CV Hunt is brilliant at: some feminist, some splatter, some weird/bizarro, and a lot of delicious body horror. My favorites are the paranoia-building Haunted House of Obsolescence and the A+ ending Gates of Hell.
December 3, 2021
A fun, fast collection of horror stories.
June 7, 2022
Most of the stories were pretty good, while a couple were just kinda meh. The Mailbox and It Came From The Sea were the best!
September 4, 2021
An excellent compilation of short paranormal and extreme horror stories.
I particularly enjoyed The Haunted House of Obsolescence, even though I read it during the day it didn't fail to get my heart racing at points. It Came From the Sea also made me cringe awfully, in a fantastic sort of way.
I particularly enjoyed The Haunted House of Obsolescence, even though I read it during the day it didn't fail to get my heart racing at points. It Came From the Sea also made me cringe awfully, in a fantastic sort of way.
December 10, 2022
When I first started hearing about C.V. Hunt, I wasn't sure their writing was for me. Don't get me wrong, I knew their books would be good - plenty of rave reviews convinced me of that. Still, their stuff sounded a bit more visceral and explicit than I was at that time ready to handle. That being said, I dived into Murder House a few months ago and loved it. So when I saw this collection, I jumped at a chance to read it and bought it for myself as a Christmas present. That was an excellent decision on my part, because I loved this one just as much, if not more, than Murder House.
There's a lot of body horror in here, which again isn't always my cup of tea, but Hunt makes the grotesque fascinating. Whether people are becoming one with outdated technology, having their body invaded by eels, or being sucked into a giant vagina (yeah, you read that right), Hunt grounds all the bizarre in solid reality, investing the reader in the character's predicaments and making you completely believe in and care about what is happening to them.
My favorite story was probably "The Mailbox," even though it featured some animal death, which I'm not a big fan of. A boy and his mother move into a new house following a divorce and are warned not to use the "cursed" mailbox. This story is both suspenseful and heartbreaking, and I could not tear myself away from it.
This is a must read for Hunt fans and an excellent book to start out with if you haven't taken the plunge into their highly unique, and yes, incredibly visceral (but that's not a bad thing) work yet.
There's a lot of body horror in here, which again isn't always my cup of tea, but Hunt makes the grotesque fascinating. Whether people are becoming one with outdated technology, having their body invaded by eels, or being sucked into a giant vagina (yeah, you read that right), Hunt grounds all the bizarre in solid reality, investing the reader in the character's predicaments and making you completely believe in and care about what is happening to them.
My favorite story was probably "The Mailbox," even though it featured some animal death, which I'm not a big fan of. A boy and his mother move into a new house following a divorce and are warned not to use the "cursed" mailbox. This story is both suspenseful and heartbreaking, and I could not tear myself away from it.
This is a must read for Hunt fans and an excellent book to start out with if you haven't taken the plunge into their highly unique, and yes, incredibly visceral (but that's not a bad thing) work yet.
February 21, 2022
A great collection of short stories and by far the best work of CV Hunt I've read. Every story is great. Lots of goopy violence and sex without crossing into cheese. Some genuinely scary stuff! I'm hard pressed to pick a fave story from the six as each was satisfying and a good read. I think CV Hunt really shines in the short story format which is why I am giving this 5 stars.
August 13, 2022
I think this is my favorite C V Hunt story collection to date. I honestly can stay I was horrified, grossed out, and still unable to put this down.
The Mailbox gave me all the IT vibes that I didn't realize I was missing. Endless Flesh creeped me out and made me question EDM festivals. Swipe Left has me questioning online dating more than ever before.
Check this collection out!!
The Mailbox gave me all the IT vibes that I didn't realize I was missing. Endless Flesh creeped me out and made me question EDM festivals. Swipe Left has me questioning online dating more than ever before.
Check this collection out!!
August 10, 2023
This is the third novel I've read of C.V. Hunt. I'm a big fan of her imaginative and crazy storylines. This was a pretty decent short story collection. My favorite was "The Mailbox" as I feel it was the most "out there". I mean seriously, a killer mailbox?!? I also really liked "It Came From the Sea" and "Endless Flesh". Fucking awesome story concepts.
May 30, 2022
I'm just constantly impressed with C.V. Hunts story telling. It's hard to find horror that not only tells a story but has an ending that's satisfactory. Pick this up. Give it a read. It's a quick one. Anyway, I don't want to go swimming this summer.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 6, 2022
You know what I like about C.V., well…everything really. Easy writing style that flows smooth. Creepy tales. And no shortage of weird.
August 23, 2022
Yes. Well, umm... it ain't Goosebumps.
March 31, 2023
Overall, I enjoyed this collection of weird short stories. They were very creative and unique!
June 6, 2023
My type of bedtime stories. I think this is my first C.V. Hunt book. Ohohoho
April 17, 2024
Not my favorite read. Each story gave a good try, but just didn’t hit with me.
June 12, 2024
I'm weird about short stories and most of these were just okay
August 5, 2024
3.5* as with all collections, I had some favorites and some that just weren’t as strong for me. But overall, a quick collection of stories that were enjoyable to read
October 24, 2021
I am intrigued by women in horror and the unique perspective we have within the genre. I will say this collection of stories felt a bit imbalanced. It started out strong and slowly looses steam throughout. The bright campiness of the cover art does a good job of foretelling what you will be in for.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews