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How to Have a Kid and a Life: A Survival Guide
Continue to have and grow your life, Mom—for your sake and your kids’. When did being a good mom come to mean giving up everything that used to make you … you? That’s the question millions of 21st-century mothers grapple with every single day as they parent in our madly kid-centric culture. Contrary to the incessant messaging from everywhere, committing to yourself and your own needs is what makes for a good mother and happy kids. With How to Have a Kid and a Life, popular journalist and Good Morning America parenting expert Ericka Sóuter shares her tips for being a happy, whole person while still being a great, and sometimes just good enough (which is plenty fine), parent. Sóuter blends her own stories of surviving the seismic challenges of parenthood with testimonials from stay-at-home and working moms; interviews with therapists and researchers; and findings from the latest studies on happiness, self-care, and parenthood. What she delivers is a wonderfully irreverent survival guide to motherhood, • Advice on keeping your career on track while parenting• Tips for handling clueless and unhelpful partners• Taking back ownership of your body• Creating a reliable village of support (even with moms you didn’t think you’d like)• Staying connected with child-free friends• What to do if you feel like you’re missing the “mom gene”
- GenresParenting
232 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 24, 2021
9 people are currently reading
115 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
February 13, 2022
A former celebrity writer created a parenting book focused on moms in her first book. Timely, relevant, and easy to read, it’s a source of inspiration and information about motherhood, especially during the pandemic.
This was a perfect match for my podcasts! I liked that the author is new to being a mother and did not have a child-rearing background, making her advice fresh. Some of her observations were still relevant to me now, but I wished I’d had the book when I was a new parent. The author boiled down her approach to six questions every mother should ask herself. The classic parenting challenges, but the author dives into the loneliness of the pandemic that makes motherhood difficult. One passage that brought that difficulty to light was when she wrote: “What is happening to moms is actually endemic of a larger problem, the epidemic of feelings of isolation and disconnection the world over. If you doubt that, consider this. The British government has appointed a minister for loneliness to deal with the nine million citizens who often or always feel lonely. Similarly, the US insurance company Cigna conducted a research study that revealed that nearly half of Americans report sometimes or always feeling alone or left out."
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at: https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/eri...
This was a perfect match for my podcasts! I liked that the author is new to being a mother and did not have a child-rearing background, making her advice fresh. Some of her observations were still relevant to me now, but I wished I’d had the book when I was a new parent. The author boiled down her approach to six questions every mother should ask herself. The classic parenting challenges, but the author dives into the loneliness of the pandemic that makes motherhood difficult. One passage that brought that difficulty to light was when she wrote: “What is happening to moms is actually endemic of a larger problem, the epidemic of feelings of isolation and disconnection the world over. If you doubt that, consider this. The British government has appointed a minister for loneliness to deal with the nine million citizens who often or always feel lonely. Similarly, the US insurance company Cigna conducted a research study that revealed that nearly half of Americans report sometimes or always feeling alone or left out."
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at: https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/eri...
April 16, 2023
Here are some highlights from the book.
-The transition to motherhood is different for every woman.
-When you sacrifice everything for your children, you may be sacrificing your own happiness in the process.
-A study if 21 countries reported that parents in the US tend to be unhappier than non-parents.
Page 12: “A German study found that being a parent created more unhappiness than divorce, unemployment, or even the death of a spouse.” Wow! I found that surprising!
Page 21: “Unhappy parents raise unhappy kids.” Kid goes to counseling. Two sessions in, the doctor makes a statement that the parents need to deal with their issues first before their child can be happy.
Page 24: “Being good for our kids has to become synonymous with being good to ourselves.”
Page 72: “Our friends can feed different parts of our soul and serve different purposes in our lives…You should never feel as though the person you are sharing with us trying to one-up your story or compare triumphs or defeats.”
Page 74: “A 2019 study found that moms who have strong friendships have children with better language, motor, socioemotional, adaptive behavioral skills.”
Page 89: “We all have flaws, and we must remember that. Sometimes we find faults in others that we have in ourselves. Don’t be a hypocrite.”
Page 91: “Your child-free friends may feel betrayed by you.”
Overall, this book opened up my eyes to the fact that we will be on this parenting journey together and as husband and wife, we need to do what is right for us - regardless of what others say or advise. A great book to read for any parent or parent-to-be.
-The transition to motherhood is different for every woman.
-When you sacrifice everything for your children, you may be sacrificing your own happiness in the process.
-A study if 21 countries reported that parents in the US tend to be unhappier than non-parents.
Page 12: “A German study found that being a parent created more unhappiness than divorce, unemployment, or even the death of a spouse.” Wow! I found that surprising!
Page 21: “Unhappy parents raise unhappy kids.” Kid goes to counseling. Two sessions in, the doctor makes a statement that the parents need to deal with their issues first before their child can be happy.
Page 24: “Being good for our kids has to become synonymous with being good to ourselves.”
Page 72: “Our friends can feed different parts of our soul and serve different purposes in our lives…You should never feel as though the person you are sharing with us trying to one-up your story or compare triumphs or defeats.”
Page 74: “A 2019 study found that moms who have strong friendships have children with better language, motor, socioemotional, adaptive behavioral skills.”
Page 89: “We all have flaws, and we must remember that. Sometimes we find faults in others that we have in ourselves. Don’t be a hypocrite.”
Page 91: “Your child-free friends may feel betrayed by you.”
Overall, this book opened up my eyes to the fact that we will be on this parenting journey together and as husband and wife, we need to do what is right for us - regardless of what others say or advise. A great book to read for any parent or parent-to-be.
December 2, 2022
This book was very interesting and very informational if you’re interested in studies regarding the transition to motherhood. I also felt the subject matter was very thorough. However, it just wasn’t what I was expecting/hoping for based on the title so I didn’t find it that helpful as a “survival guide”.
October 13, 2025
A bit cliché at times and compared to the last baby/pregnancy book I read (a feminist guide to pregnancy) this book felt almost backwards at times, buying into some cultural norms. The first few chapters were also a very forbidding and warning tone which could scare some folks off, it definitely didn't kick off with a positive or encouraging tone.
Read
June 23, 2023This is mostly aim towards first time, mothers, but there’s still some interesting information for other parents as well. There’s nothing really groundbreaking in this book and it’s not really the survival guide the title claims it to me.
November 12, 2023
Eye opening
It was a bit difficult to read past the statistics in the first few chapters, there was so many numbers. But, overall a great read to think deeply about and very encouraging.
It was a bit difficult to read past the statistics in the first few chapters, there was so many numbers. But, overall a great read to think deeply about and very encouraging.
October 18, 2024
As a father of 2 this book just wasn't for me. I suspect there are a lot of new moms who would really benefit from this.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews