Dog Food

by Peter Caffrey

Trapped between normality and insanity, somewhere in the darkness, exists a state of consciousness so bleak, so miserable, so inescapable, that it can erode the very fabric of a man’s will to survive.

David Miller hates coming home from holidays. The return journey is always stressful, but without the reward of a vacation at the end. When his break in the Algarve ends, the journey home is plagued by his miserable wife and squealing children, and the irritations of budget airlines push him to the edge. But once the plane lands, things get darker when he meets the bald man.

Dog Food is an absurdist tale of one man’s descent into the abyss…

Genres: Horror

80 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 12, 2021

About the author

Peter Caffrey creates stories stained with the darkest of dark humour, featuring elements of splattery filth, horror, bizarro and absurdity.

Alongside numerous books, his work has also appeared in a number of anthologies including ABC’s of Terror (Vol 4), Call Me Hoop, Unamerican Trash, In Uterus, Prose in Poor Taste (Vol 2), The Best of Bizarro Fiction (Vol 2) and The Bumper Book of British Bizarro. He has also featured in many publications including Underbelly, Horror Sleaze Trash, Infernal Ink, Terror House, Frontier Tales and Schlock!

He likes apes, dislikes gravity, and is unlikely to change.

Reviews

[Lady MacDeath · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wtf did I just read??!! I think my brain needs lobotomising!!

This was crazy, absurd, far out, weird and completely f*cked with my head! I feel as though I’ve just come down from an acid fuelled weekend!
This wasn’t only far out there, but was also, bloody hilarious 🤣🤣🤣

Thank you Mr Caffrey, the bill for my therapy is in the post!!

Highly recommend! 🤪🤪🤪

[Janie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I did not know what to expect going into this story, and I am so glad that I read it. Its farcical and incongruous elements made me feel uncomfortable for the main character, who is clueless about the situation he is entangled in. What is real? Is escape from an absurd and claustrophobic environment possible? With a pit of dread in my stomach, I read this story straight through to its conclusion. Brilliant, Mr. Caffrey.

[MadameD · Rating 5 out of 5]

OMG!! Wow!!
Dog Food by Peter Caffrey is brilliant!
This story is well written, intriguing, incredible bizarre and absurd. It made me questioning myself all along, about what this book is about. It was mind blowing. I didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. All of these strange situations were so surprising, that they made me laugh.
Extreme absurdity can become a Nightmare!!
I have a theory about this book. David won’t like it.😈
I loved it!!

[Peter Topside · Rating 4 out of 5]

This really made me anxious. Our lead, David Miller, had more patience here in one finger, than I could ever hope to have in my entire body. Here at the Topside compound, patience is a respected, admirable trait, despite none of us having it. I get irritated when the cashier at the grocery store scans items too slowly. But I imagine myself at an airport being held up by incompetent TSA agents and such, like David, and I wanna yank my skin off. And the story just got weirder and more complex as David was imprisoned and subjected to all these strange occurrences. The plot wasn't much, but Peter Caffrey kept the focus on the experience of the lead and not so much on plot development, which was a good idea. You experience all of David's thoughts and feelings and it will keep you on the edge of your seat until the very end. Now, on the end, I feel like it sort of dropped off after such a strong showing. I would have liked much more on David's ultimate conclusion to bring this whole story full circle. Not without some flaws, this was still a very unique and enjoyable experience.

[Ian · Rating 4 out of 5]

'Dark, darker and definitely the darkest of Dog Meat'

'Holy Shit - what have I just read?'

A humorous absurd tale that takes us back into the depths of David's and our very own untapped consciousness.

A truly hilarious first chapter that should resonate with any father coming back from their annual family holiday abroad and then encountering a possible problem with the authorities that could well escalate itself into a deep, dark and extremely disturbing place of futile annoyance, despair and complete hopelessness.

For the rest of the book I think I get the idea (sort of) but then again I ask myself if I really am expected to do so.

A surreal and absurd story written with pure genius which proved to be a great little read and tested the little grey brain cells to the full.

For any future readers - answers on a postcard if you can shed any light on this crazy tale, but please feel free to contact me anytime if you wish to share theories.

Btw - There's just got to be a sequel coming soon - 'Cat Food'. Any plans, Peter? :)

Rating: 4.4 insane stars of possible comfortable enjoyment. Strange, but I really did like it!

[Simon McHardy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Returning from the Algarve exhausted daddy, David Miller’s holiday gets a whole lot worse. Taunted by insane bureaucrats, a puddle of piss, dog food, cat, dog, pig, c**t paste, any kind of paste really, David is living inside a surreal nightmare.

A disturbing read that instills a sense of creeping dread. Peter Caffrey is the mad genius of indie horror.

[Vicki Herbert · Rating 5 out of 5]

All the Meat All the Time...

DOG FOOD by Peter Caffrey

No spoilers. 5 stars. This is a TWILIGHT ZONE style tale with an ending open for interpretation. This is my take...

David Miller's family vacation had come to an end. He had chosen a cut-rate airline to save a little money...

But...

The airline had other ways to stick it to David to increase their profit. David refused to fall for their game...

He was assigned a middle seat among strangers while his family flew together...

You always get what you pay for...

David was again separated from his family at the passport check-in. They went right through while David was detained by security...

He was locked in a holding cell where, for days, he was given no food or water, denied access to a lawyer, and...

Mentally abused...

All he wanted was to go home, but those in charge talked nonsense to him, made him urinate on the floor, and...

Gave him food that had been tampered with, turning it into garbage that he was afraid to touch...

And...

Brought him coffee, which had been urinated and ejaculated in when he asked for a drink of water...

Security did everything they could think of to abuse him, and then some, until he was like an animal without rights...

And then the end: All meat all the time...

That is my take on this story without spoiling the ending. David found out what an animal without rights must feel like in the hands of so-called humans... at a place trying to recover some of their airline losses with a little side business.

I welcome anyone with another theory to enlighten me, lol.

[Corrina Morse · Rating 5 out of 5]

Holy Crap!! That was an insane headfuck!!
I feel like I've just done a shit ton of drugs or lived through an immensely vivid nightmare! 😂
Horrifying!!
I've read all but one of Peter Caffreys books now, and this one has just become my favourite!! I genuinely didn't see where it was going! Loved it!
An awesomely, enjoyable, creepy, mind twisting story!! Peter....you've twisted my melon man!! 😉
🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

[Victoria · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was very dark and very creepy. I didn't read what it was about when I started reading and I was pleasantly surprised. So creepy.

[your morbid obsession Minerva🖤 · Rating 5 out of 5]

You know what? This was awesome. Unreliable narrator/unreliable story, fast paced, crazy 😜
This story is like unknowingly taking some random drugs from your granny’s bathroom cabinet.

[Todd Love · Rating 5 out of 5]

Real Life is Hard
The everyday mundane, what might be compared to watching paint dry, are days we should not take for granted. Enjoy boredom, enjoy quiet family time watching the latest Netflix movie. One day life may turn around and bite you on the ass, face, neck and other nasty bits. I loved this decent into darkness. Well written and thought out. I will be going back to get Caffrey’s other works.

[Rayne Havok · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an absolute orgy of mind-fucks! A confusing journey through fuck-knows-where, for a long, or short amount of time. I laughed out loud more than once.
A must read!

[Tim Eagle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Caffrey spins a tale of Murphy's Law, anything that will go wrong, certainly will as this tale of the bizarre, twisted and slightly askew nature of story telling. A family man spirals down an abyss and down a rabbit hole after vacationing, is he mad? Or was the family vacation just too much for his fragile mind? Find out as you sit at the airport and read this twilight zone-esque tale of weirdness.

[The Yeti Reads and Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

The holidays. The most stressful times. Just ask David. He is on his way home with the family in tow. His annoying children and irritable wife aren't making things easier. Don't get him started on the airlines. He thinks it's bad now; wait until the plane lands.

What the hell did I read? This was madness, and I loved it. A tale that spirals out of control, leaving you questioning your own sanity. If you haven't read Caffrey yet, you really should. Stellar. Check it out.

5 severed fingers out of 5

[Alex · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my first book by Peter Caffrey, and omg.........

This is one of those "what the fuck is going on" type of books. I was HOOKED all the way through and could not put it down!

4/5

[Xtina Reads · Rating 4 out of 5]

HELLO? WHAT??

I love a confused and gaslit MC

[Joseph Barber · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

David Miller was taken to an interview room after departing his flight from Portugal. A bald man and a blonde woman interrogated David and played psychological mind games.

David only wanted to get the interrogation over with so he could get back home to his wife and kids. As he spiraled into madness nothing is what it seemed. And home was very far away.

[Lindsay Crook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well I wasn't expecting that. I don't know why I waited so long to read this. I freaking loved the dark and bizarre turn this took. I love Pete's style and laughed more than once.
I'm fully submerged in a Caffrey binge read.

[AJRXII · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun psychological and then a let down at the end 🙈

[Trish · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fantastic, and multi-layered, immersive read.

Confinement, isolation and authoritarian gaslighting, leaves you constantly question what is real - you live the same experience of the MC - you suffer the same confusion.

The fabulous Caffrey absurdisms make you laugh, pause and question.

Strongly recommend.

[Gary Vassallo · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a wild ride! I was hooked from the last and could not put it down. I really enjoyed the absurdist horror and constantly trying to work out what was going on. As well as horror, I enjoy Kafka and humour and this gave me all those vibes, This was my second Peter Caffrey book and I have loved them both. It certainly won't be my last. Highly recommended!

[Jason · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reminded me of my layover at the Ronald Regan International Airport. Fortunately Tobe Hooper films made me hip to what Texans put in their chili, so I did as little interacting as possible with the TSA agents.

[Jennifer Matchett · Rating 3 out of 5]

This one will mess with your mind…literally. Poor David just wanted to get on with his mediocre life after going on holiday. Makes me not wanna fly anywhere…

[John The Crippledgimp · Rating 5 out of 5]

As always Peter Caffrey fucking rocks. This was a dark, twisted, mind duck that had me guessing until the wild fucked up end.

[Roxie · Rating 4 out of 5]

loved the insanity, wish there was moreee