Letters to My Brown Mother: Stories of Mental Health

by Muzna Abbas

What happens when we dismantle the stigma surrounding mental health in South Asian communities?Muzna Abbas examines historical events, migration patterns, and cultural communities to understand why South Asian migrants fail to adequately address mental health. She shows how culture, gender, and religion intersect to impact immigrants and their posterity. Abbas not only offers facts and figures, but personifies the mental health crisis through letters by South Asians from different walks of life, including a queer adult to his younger self and a young woman in a toxic marriage. The book culminates in a call to action by offering readers advice on seeking culturally-sensitive therapy, self-care practices, and imperative conversations.Letters to My Brown Mother includes heart-wrenching anecdotes and soulful descriptions that promise to educate and change the South Asian community for the better.

190 pages, Kindle Edition

Published August 30, 2021

Reviews

[Zaynab · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book and feel that it explains the South Asian American experience so eloquently. I related it to deeply and it put in words what I have experienced and felt for a very long time. My only critique is that there is a shift in who the intended audience of the book is which is a little confusing. The first half is mostly for the non-South asian to understand the experience while “moving forward” is directed at South Asians. This shift in direction was unexpected and felt like the book was two separate entities. Overall, great book that really highlights the importance of mental health as well as the immigrant struggle and how the two relate.

[Deandre Jones · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome Book

I truly appreciate how honest and vulnerable she was with her experience as well as others who wrote their own entries throughout the book. I do a lot of work with colleagues in and from South Asia. I feel like this book made me rethink of how I interact with many in this community while also giving me a ton of shared experiences even though we’re from completely different backgrounds. Highly recommend and have already recommended to others

[Simhya Karthikeyan · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I could go back in time and give my younger self this book I would 🥺. I think I am going to buy a physical book just because I learned so much from it and it would be good to reference time to time. This book captured mental health struggles most first generation South Asian immigrants go through. It addresses mental health in a culturally competent way. The first half explains issues that are faced by the community for everyone to understand & the second half is a direct call to action addressed to South Asians. The author also did a great job of also addressing taboo topics in the community such as relationship violence, divorce, being desi queer, etc.

Some things I learned/stuck with me:
- our generation’s ceiling is the next generation’s floor
- Collectivism encouraging conformity and dissenting individuals that stand out & family enmeshment
- The hierarchy in social relationships which affect mental health
- How people think that addressing mental health denounces culture. How people also think that denouncing culture means denouncing religion
- What depression looks like in high functioning individuals
- “You’re really unsure of where you begin and your parents’ or family’s version of you stops”
- Hypermasculine angry young men portrayed in Bollywood and its effects
- weaponized mortality
- How to integrate mental health practices in spaces you don’t feel psychologically safe & setting boundaries in a culturally competent way

[Mazahir Bootwala · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really good book about the (lack of) familial mental health support people primarily from the south Asian diaspora receive. The book uses real life examples — including experiences from the authors own life — to bring attention to struggles of being able to express mental illness in brown families. The book provides good insights and advise on what we can do better to bring attention to these problems. I’d recommend this book to anyone struggling to talk about mental health with their brown family or any parent trying to understand their child better.

[Mariam · Rating 5 out of 5]

highly recommend this book. i felt so represented and understood and found language to be able to better explain my experiences.

[Sarah Cash · Rating 4 out of 5]

Love this book it was both relatable and validating. My favorite read this year