For Joshua: An Ojibway Father Teaches His Son

by Richard Wagamese

Celebrated Ojibway author Richard Wagamese shares the traditions and teachings of his people, entwining them with an account of his own life-long struggle for self-knowledge and self-respect.

Richard Wagamese stares the modern world in the eye and takes careful note of its snares and perils. He sees people coveting without knowing why, people looking for roots without understanding what might constitute rootedness, people looking for acceptance without offering reciprocal respect, and people longing for love without knowing how to offer it. And underneath all lurks the seductive oblivion of substance abuse. These are the pitfalls of his own life, dangers he hopes his estranged son, Joshua, will be able to navigate with the guidance afforded by this heartfelt memoir.

Richard Wagamese has no easy answers. His road to self-knowledge has been long and treacherous -- and it is in part this series of trials that has furnished him if not with a complete set of answers then at least a profound understanding of the questions. Again and again Wagamese brings universal problems into astonishingly sharp focus by sharing the special wisdom of Canada’s First Nations, while reminding us that we are not so different after all.

Genres: Nonfiction, Indigenous, Memoir, Canada, Audiobook, Biography, Spirituality

240 pages, Hardcover

First published October 8, 2002

About the author

Richard Wagamese was one of Canada's foremost Native authors and storytellers. He worked as a professional writer since 1979. He was a newspaper columnist and reporter, radio and television broadcaster and producer, documentary producer and the author of twelve titles from major Canadian publishers.

Reviews

[Diane S ☔ · Rating 4 out of 5]

We read books and often do not think about the people who wrote. What we're their lives like, what struggles they had. How they overcame them, if they did? The two books I have resd by this amazing man, I've loved. This one he wrote to his son. It is a candid, powerful,and moving book about a man who was lost, never knowing where he belonged. A man who often talked, the talk, but didn't walk the
walk.

It is an objewe father's responsibility to teach his son the objewe of living. He explains to his son why he could not fulfill this mission. Their are Objewe stories within, meant as lessons, teaching moments. I found them beautiful. He like many native Americans had many struggles, but he also found a few who tried to show him what was within himself and how to bring them forth. Sweat lodge ceremonies, a three day quest, how to connect back to mother Earth.

He is gone now, only his words remain. Priceless.

ARC from Edelweiss.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an eloquent, impassioned confession by an aboriginal father, to his son, who is wanting to shed light on the life he's led. It is a heart-rending admission of his failures; and a glorious affirmation of survival. It probably should be read in tandem with One Native Life, for it fills in some of the backstory to it, but as a stand-alone book it works just fine. This one was written about 5 years before ONL, and whereas ONL emerges more as a series of meditations, this one is more a straight line from there to here: how he became so damaged, and how he healed himself.

[❀ Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

https://ayearofbooksblog.com/2017/04/...

A beautiful, honest and reflective voice was silenced this March but lives on through the amazing books published by Richard Wagamese. His writing reflects his struggles with loneliness, belonging, alcoholism and homelessness. I am sad that I will never get to meet this humble man who bravely shared his life and helped others through his prose. His books are Canadian treasures which should be celebrated by all Canadian’s.

for JOSHUA is a memoir written to teach his estranged son about his own troubled past, what he had learned and to guide him in the important tradition and The Medicine Wheel. It ends with a heartfelt letter to Joshua noting that he does not know if he will ever read it or if they will meet again but that the book belongs to him. It is painful at times, to understand how his life experiences led him to self-destructive choices and dysfunction, yet also influenced his impactful stories.

Wagamese describes his 4 day vision quest. As he sits in a circle, with only nature for company, he ponders his life through days, nights, rain and pests. He has no food, has only a limited amount of water and has a with a blanket for warmth and shelter. He ponders his past and describes his traumatic childhood when he was separated from his family, his siblings, his culture and land to live with a white family in Southern Ontario.

“Before long I settled into silence. I began to notice that silence wasn’t really silence at all. As I sat there looking around, observing, I could hear things I had never heard before, voices of the world that I’d been deaf to, noises and shifts of sound that filled all of the great space around me”.

He shared the hardships of homelessness dulled by alcoholism as he drank whatever he could get his hands on lapsing into unconsciousness to forget his pain and loneliness. Wagamese did not sugar coat his past, he admitted that he had a grade 9 education, that he had lived under bridges and openly shared that he was incarcerated for using a stolen credit card. He spent time at the Burtch Correctional Centre which was a detention centre just outside my own community. (Interesting to note, the Burtch lands have recently been remediated and returned to Six Nations).

He was brutally honest about how difficult it was to stop drinking and to accept himself as a drunk. He slowly came to understand the importance of the Ojibway culture and his connection to the land.

Despite his pain, substance abuse and hard living, he wrote beautiful stories. He would spend time in libraries, even when he was homeless, reading and listening to music. He sought out teachings to learn about his culture. He worked in radio and wrote novels.

“I would sneak off to the library and spend hours reading books. Reading always filled that emptiness for me and so I became voracious. I read history, geography, politics, architecture, astronomy, anthropology, sociology, fiction, poetry and books on art, film and music.”

It is sad that Canada has lost Richard Wagamese but his spirit lives on through his writing. I have read a few of his novels and his memoirs and each time learn more about his experience, Canada and myself. Our book club has decided to read books by this author for the month of July. We will all choose our own book and discuss a selection of his writing.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am profoundly moved. This soul-bearing blend of memoir and indigenous teachings doesn’t shy away from Wagamese’s struggles with displacement, self-doubt and addiction. Some scenes are heartbreaking, some are enraging but all are full of honesty and wisdom. This should be required reading for all Canadians as part of our journey to Truth and Reconciliation.

[Kathleen Nightingale · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is eye opening. It provides the reader with a lot of reflection and things to take with them while they go about their day. Wagamese especially gives the reader a glimpse into an alcoholic's life along with being Native. I loved what Wagamese had to share about the Native/white man's analogy regarding the making of Canada.

[Ambdkerr · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book ripped me open. I was given this book as a gift and was reading it when Richard passed away. His passing hurt my heart deeply. I finished reading it with tears and smiles and started right back at the beginning. In total I read it two and a half times before passing it on to someone who needed to read it more than me. This book rises to near the top of favourite books of all time. Perhaps that is because I am yearning for any connection to my own heritage as an Indigenous person (having been raised very much as a white product of colonialism). Perhaps it was because I saw his pain and could relate parts of his story to parts of my own. Either way a beautiful mix of personal trauma, healing, self discovery, and traditional teachings, and old story. So now I'm on to another of his books. Hiy Hiy RW. Hiy Hiy.

[John Benson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read three of Richard Wagamese's novels and have been very impressed. This is his first non-fiction book that I have read. It is written in the form of a letter to his six year old son, Joshua, who is living with his ex-wife and so he feels estranged from both of them. In the book, he tells of the lessons he has learned from his hard life as he battled a lack of a sense of identity, alcoholism, and other ills. Through trying to work through his understanding of his Native American roots and honestly confronting his past, Wagamese tries to let his son know who he really is. It is an honest portrayal that helps me understand what was behind the very honest and open novels that I read by him earlier. Though not written in language that a six year old would understand, hopefully, it helped Joshua understand his father as he himself grew into adulthood.

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sadly I was in the middle of this book when Wagamese passed away much too soon at the age of 61. He is one of my favourite writers. Each book, especially his non-fiction have touched me personally and this one was no exception. His stories of heartbreak, loneliness, addiction and trying to pull out of it but failing, succeeding for a wile, failing again but always trying are so universal and so real. Not meant to be inspirational, just truthful but that is refreshing and rare.
At the end of the book when he talks about what it means to be Canadian was so true, at least for me and was so uniting in nature. He will be hugely missed.

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

A story that brings you back to your roots, to nature and to what matters in the bigger picture. His struggle is incredible and frustrating to me but some of his messages really went straight to my heart and revived my spiritual side a little bit.
Aside from enjoying his poetic but clear style of writing, a couple times it made me stop and think about what I'm truly grateful for, why certain things make me feel angry and unworthy in my life and how to ultimately live more meaningfully.

[Fraser Simons · Rating 4 out of 5]

It would be a little too sentimental for my taste, had it not had a premise where it made sense and included so many mythological indigenous stories. Paralleling these with Wagamese’ own discovery of his indigenous selfhood many years after being ripped from his siblings and family with these stories is a stroke of genius; at once passing on generational knowledge to his own child, while being open and vulnerable about his journey this far.

[Eric · Rating 5 out of 5]

As an Ojibway man who grew up mostly without his father, this book hit hard. Bringing up old feelings and more importantly new ones with a better understanding in the stories I grew up listening to, this was deeply moving.

Powerful stuff to anyone searching. Would recommend to anyone and I will be gifting this book to my family 100%.

Meegwetch, Richard!

[Kristen Lawrance · Rating 5 out of 5]

For Joshua, By Richard Wagamese, was wow, wow, wow, wow. The book is non-fiction, and is written as a letter to Wagamese’s estranged son. The book is written in a similar way to “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle in that it is a mix between explaining learned philosophies, story telling, and poetically sharing feelings. Unlike “Untamed”, however, this book really resonated with me. Wagamese did SUCH an amazing job of explaining his emotional and philosophical processes by talking about his own journey, as well as by telling proverbs from his Ojibwa culture. While reading, it did not feel like you were being preached at, but more so like you were going on a spiritual journey with the author.

This book was made even more interesting to me, as I was a HUGE fan of Wagamese’s novel “The Keeper’n Me”. It was fascinating to learn about the man behind the writing. Both books contain similar themes, which include: the human need for community, the significance of spirituality, and importance of being connected to one’s culture. If you are more of a fan of fiction, I would say read “The Keeper’n Me” first, but if you are a fan of memior/self-help I would read “For Joshua” first.

This book is also an excellent companion to “From the Ashes”, in that it offers another window into the traumas that indigenous Canadians

[Sarah Knopp · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everything Richard Wagamese wrote is medicine. He teaches in such a gentle way about the beauty of ceremony in this book, written for his estranged son. It was a moving and, at moments, heart wrenching journey to read... as all his works are. He remains one of my all time favourite authors and teachers

[Linnea · Rating 5 out of 5]

A really beautiful story. Even if you don't know how to even spell "Ojibway" off the top of your head, you'll be able to relate to this story about discovery, "because everyone has lost someone or something they miss with a longing that is deep and blue and cold" (Wagamese 223).

Wagamese struggles to understand his identity as an Ojibway man. Passed from foster home to foster home, and then into a loving but ill-fitting adoptive family, his searching for roots becomes virtually impossible. Then, Wagamese discovers the soothing tides of alcohol. As he's washed over, time and time again, he's able to momentarily forget his guilt, his loneliness, and his misinformed identity. Yet, Wagamese doesn't fail to experience, or to remind us, that what we drown never stays at the bottom of the ocean floor - the same questions rise to the surface until we are truly able to confront them and acknowledge our limitations in answering them.

This book was helpful to me as a fresh means of dissecting my own search for meaning within my lineage and within my spiritual heritage. Non-Native readers can be grateful that Wagamese is gracious - he acknowledges the validity of the aggressions of the White man against Native communities in Canada, but his lessons are there for anyone who has ever felt incomplete on his own and has felt the need to hide for fear of being truly known and of being rejected. His story is not "only for those of us who were here first, who are native to it, but everyone" (216). Wagamese also reminds us that upon finding peace in who we are, it is our responsibility to care for the next seekers after us: "As parents and teachers we need to tell our children this - that you can never be less than who you were created to be. You never have to qualify. You never have to prove yourself. You just need to be" (220).

Wagamese's style is accessible and his layout is both clean and precise, and yet fluid and natural. He carefully situates desolate tales of drinking to the bottoms of lysol bottles next to his captivating renderings of Native myths. Every moment is as though you are invited to step into a painting and breathe the strokes alongside Wagamese. I found the parallels between the values of Wagamese's Native myths and the Bible stories I have grown up with a beautiful way of finally connecting my experience to a man whose work I may have otherwise not noticed. This is Wagamese's point, I suppose, is that we are all striving to belong and to connect, and that we must first give ear to one another before being heard.

For me, one of the most influential passages is when Wagamese shares with his mentor John what he has discovered after a four day spiritual meditation in the Albertan wilderness. I read the interaction between the two as one of the best expressions of how God, or the Creator for Wagamese, accepts his children after, and even despite or perhaps because of, their having traveled long, bruising journeys:

"Well, if I want love, security, trust, friendship, and all those good things in life, then I need to give away those things to the people around me. All people, all the time. Not just Native people, but all people."
John nodded and heaved a huge sigh. Then he looked at me and smiled. He didn't need to say anything; I knew what he was feeling. By the time we pulled up to the front door of my apartment building I was glad to be back in the civilized world.
"You did well. I'm proud of you," he said, giving me a big hug.
"I'm proud of me, too," I said. (201)

[Samantha · Rating 5 out of 5]

"I spoke of nothing. I had no stories, no quality that made the life I'd lived up to them compelling or entertaining, but I was fixed on everything that was said that night. One by one we heard about life. Canadian life. And if there was one thing more than any other that made all those words memorable for me, it was the sameness. The geography might have been different, and the fabric of the lives a varied texture, but there was a feel to every story that reflected itself in the tale that followed it. Back then I called it sameness--now I call it kinship." (p. 109).

"I thought about the rain I'd endured. It had shown me that the gifts of the world--the wind, rain, snow, heat, humidity--all work to a purpose. Beforehand, I could only see the discomfort they caused me. My discomfort led to being critical, complaining about the lack of comfort in my life. I saw now that it was always going to be either too hot, too cold, too wet, too dry, too dark, too bright, or not enough of any of them. The rain, like the ants before them, was telling me that I am a part of Creation whether I like what's happening or not. My purpose, like that of all Creation, is to continue. Creation is intent on continuing towards its best possible fulfillment of itself--because that is the reason for life. I saw then, in that tree in the rock and the rain, that I needed to continue on towards the best possible fulfillment of me--the best I can possibly be--despite what was going on around me. The rain taught me that and I was thankful." (p. 135).

"That's what makes us Ojibway people: the knowledge that the land is a feeling, and sensing it in the soles of our feet." (p. 214).

"As parents and teachers we need to tell our children this--that you can never be less than who you were created to be. You never have to qualify. You never have to prove yourself. You just need to be." (p. 220).

[Care · Rating 4 out of 5]

A combination of memoir, letter, spiritual reflection, and motivational writing. The last two aren't genres/forms I typically read so that definitely disconnected my enjoyment of this book from the memoir and letter aspect. They were done well and in a different way that I had encountered before, but it's just not my jam to read spiritual/self-help type stuff.
Barring that, the memoir and "For Joshua" portions were eloquent and humble, and mostly sad. Hardships in every stage of life without a connection to his past, his people, or his culture. Reading about his re-discovery of Ojibway identity through ceremony was my favourite part, the different memories and experiences he recounted through the days in nature, I felt the tone of respect and love through his words.
And there was no real blame in this memoir; it's a meditation on the past without pointing fingers. He doesn't dwell on the adoption agency, his foster and adoptive families, his friends who he drank with — no one is really blamed for his challenges in life. He explains how feelings of doubt, self-hatred, disconnect, and unbelonging led to his addictions and anger, but doesn't blame anyone for it. He understands it's his responsibility to reconnect with his heritage and take control of his life, but he also doesn't meditate on his own mistakes or blame himself. As the audience, we can make assumptions about how his childhood led to his troubled adulthood, but he doesn't encourage this, he just tells his story. Humble, at peace.
I definitely recommend this book to fans of memoirs, self-help, spiritual writing, the crop of 'letter to...' genre emerging recently, and Canadiana.

[Andrew · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although the late Wagamese wrote this memoir with intent for his son, this book is going to change a lot of lives. Richard recounts his socially isolated childhood growing up in white families, ripped from his Ojibway roots. Adolescence and adulthood aren't much better, finding comfort in alcohol and wandering alone. He reflects upon it during a solo four-day ceremony in the Rockies, where he sits, prays, and takes the hardest journey of all: the journey to the self. For Joshua is both beautiful and harsh, a guiding light for both Wagamese and his readers, a book that will stand the test of time.

[Joyce · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wagamese is my favourite First Nations author. His writing style and story telling ability is awe inspiring. This is a memoir written for the benefit of his son, Joshua, detailing his life from the time he was a small boy until the present, revealing his emotions, experiences and his painful struggles with his identity and involving drugs and alcohol. It struck a chord with me with regards to steps he undertook for spiritual, emotional and resultant mental and physical rejuvenation. Heartrending, yet hopeful. Loved it and would give it 4 1/2 stars, but that doesn't seem an option.

[Sarah H · Rating 5 out of 5]

CW: Alcoholism, Addiction, Forced Displacement, Suicidal Ideation

This books speaks so importantly to the ways in which colonialism has affected and impacted the physical, mental, social, and spiritual wellbeing of Indigenous people’s across this land. Richard Wagamase writes with such honesty and vulnerability in his recounting of his life experiences and learning, and it was a gift to read his words and learn from him.

[Jonathan Cortés · Rating 5 out of 5]

Un libro que me genero mucha tristeza al inicio pero que al final me dejo con mucha energía y curiosidad por respetar nuestro entorno natural y saberes ancestrales que no se enseñan en las escuelas pero que han vivido durante generaciones en todas las culturales americanas previas a la colonización.

Sabiduría que se resiste.

[Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Richard Wagamese is fast becoming one of my favorite authors!
Very spiritual and calming to read...it was like I was with him on that ledge.
Teach the children well.

[Stephanie C · Rating 5 out of 5]

5****
One of the absolute best books that thoroughly explains, in a very personal way, the traditions of the medicine wheel, the sweat house, the unity pipe (commonly misnamed the peace pipe), and the spiritual wisdom teachings of the Ojibwe tribal nation.

Yet this heartfelt, touching letter to Wagamese’s estranged son is so much more than just that because while the author spent a lifetime searching for his identity, he explains the excruciating process of self exploration with raw vulnerability. He recounts his foster homes, his adoption by a white American family, his multiple stints in jail, his raging alcoholism, and his dabbling with the vigilant AIM (American Indian Movement). More so, Wagamese invites us into his tortured soul, feeling his overwhelming shame, guilt, and loneliness over feeling wholly inadequate to be loved or wanted. A man who has written countless books, won national awards, and taught at universities always felt that he was an imposter who simply never felt good enough to deserve the accolades.

Soak in the wisdom of this book and appreciate with utmost respect the journey this man has had the courage to share with us. More than an Indigenous tribal member, more than a writer, more than a father, this man fully represents what it means to be human, to suffer, and to find peace through the land, through love, and through self-acceptance.

[McKinley Terry · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful, contemplative memoir written from a father to his son as part of their Native heritage, as well as a reminder that connection to our history, land, and stories is essential to growing in wisdom.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading Richard Wagamese as a part of honouring TRC day is becoming a tradition of mine. This was hard to read at times knowing that it was the truth and not fiction. Wagamese is a great storyteller and I didn't know about his struggles. This was beautifully and painfully honest and very moving.

[Marina Diana · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this would be a better 2D or 3U than 1D

[Robyn Denise · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it. Love memoirs. Love Richard Wagamese. So much.

[Erika · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is classed as fiction but it really more a memoir where Wagamese shares his search for belonging and his fight with alcohol. A powerful read.

[Sami Hoch · Rating 4 out of 5]

really enjoyed reading and learning about the author’s vision quest

[siena · Rating 5 out of 5]

beautiful & heartbreaking & raw. the best book I’ve read in a long time!

[Bron Wyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the most beautiful, insightful, honest, and heartfelt books I've ever read. The words within these pages have touched my heart. By the end I was sobbing (in a good way), I really hope his son did read this book.