We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption

by Kaira Jewel Lingo

In ten concise chapters, you'll learn powerful ways to meet life's challenges with wisdom, resilience, and ease.

We all go through times when it feels like the ground is being pulled out from under us. What we relied on as steady and solid may change or even appear to vanish. In this era of global disruption, threats to our individual, social, and planetary safety abound, and at times life can feel overwhelming. Not only are loss and separation painful, but even positive changes can cause great stress. 

Yet life is full of birth, death, marriage, divorce; a new relationship; losing or starting a job; beginning a new phase in life or ending one. Change is stressful, even when it is much desired or anticipated—the unknown can feel scary and threatening. In We Were Made for These Times, the extraordinary mindfulness teacher Kaira Jewel Lingo imparts accessible advice on navigating difficult times of transition, drawing on Buddhist teachings on impermanence to help you establish equanimity and resilience. 
 
Each chapter in We Were Made for These Times holds an essential teaching and meditation, unfolding a step-by-step process to nurture deeper freedom and stability in daily life. Time-honored teachings will help you develop ease, presence, and self-compassion, supporting you to release the fear and doubt that hold you back. 

Genres: Buddhism, Nonfiction, Spirituality, Self Help, Philosophy, Audiobook, Psychology

148 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 19, 2021

Reviews

[Minahil · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the most amazing newer spirituality books ive read in a long time. At no point does the author treat you like you’ve never heard of meditation or energy before which I find to be a big problem when searching for new books. She tells her story in a beautiful way that ties everything together, brings up points ive never thought about before and gives amazing meditation exercises and journaling prompts. Also talks about race in regard to spirituality which is rare. This book was written with so much love and you feel it the entire time.

[Katie Allen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kaira Jewel was one of my teachers at the outdoor meditation retreat I attended at Spirit Rock in 2022, and her teachings and the way she conducted herself had such an impact on me that I immediately bought her book at the end of the retreat.

It's short with 10 chapters and guided meditations at the end of each with journaling prompts. I read a chapter a week with my dharma reading group, and we'd listen to her meditation on Insight Timer that went with each chapter before our discussion. It was a deeply meaningful way to experience this book and teachings, and I highly recommend it to anyone who's either experiencing a challenge or wants to be more prepared for future challenges.

I guess what I mean is, I recommend this to all humans.

[Laura Hoffman Brauman · Rating 5 out of 5]

We Were Made For These Times focuses on 10 practical lessons and techniques on how to deal with change and disruption. In a time where the pace of change politically - and the substance of the change - can feel overwhelming, Lingo's book gives concrete steps on how to process without withdrawing or turning away. Each chapter provides an overview and context on the lesson, suggestions for meditation, application for daily life, and prompts for journaling. I did my first read as an overview and now plan to go back and spend more in-depth time with each chapter and strategy. While it was the larger social context that attracted me to this work, I also see tremendous value in applying these strategies as we navigate disruption on a more personal scale in our lives. A huge thanks to @RhodeReads for putting this on my radar.

[Magalie Robert · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s an amazing ressource! I loved it and will 100% return to it. Plus the little end of chapters meditations and chanting on the audiobook were lovely 🫶🏻💫🌌

[Hannah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a really straightforward, down to earth and easy to digest guide to applying mindfulness to everyday life and its many challenges. I discovered this book thanks to the plum village app which is a fantastic free resource for anyone interested in mindfulness or meditation. Kaira Jewel Lingo was a student of Thich Nhât Hanh for many years and it shows. There are 10 short chapters centered around a "lesson" for getting through times of transition and challenge. Each chapter is followed by a meditation exercise, poem and journaling prompts. I liked some of the exercises more than others and have been practicing them most days as I slowly worked my way through the book over the last month. It isn't a book to rush through. I dropped a star as I felt the last few chapters petered out a little and there was a little repetition but on the whole I am so glad I read this book! The meditations have led me to some wonderful insights and moments of peace and I hope I can stick with my daily practice

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book to be read slowly and repeatedly. I really loved it and look forward to finding Kiara's meditations on Insight Timer.

[Alicia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book, and it was exactly what I needed at this moment in my life, a moment of much change, indeed. There are ten meditations, which include journaling exercises and reflections by Lingo about them as well. I deeply appreciated Lingo's personal connections to the meditations and her story of change - that of both deciding to be an ordained Buddhist nun, and then, after 15 years, listening to her inner knowing and deciding to leave this calling. She is definitely someone who you feel walks the walk, which I think adds to the power of the resources she shares. If you're familiar with Buddhist meditations, these may all be familiar to you, but I had never heard of the five remembrances or eight worldly winds, which were particularly powerful for me. I highly recommend this intersectional book of wisdom.

[Halle Rivero · Rating 5 out of 5]

Definitely a book I’ll have to continue to come back to for guidance on meditation

[Joanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Amazing book that I would recommend to anyone looking for more peace and equanimity in their lives.

[Adam · Rating 5 out of 5]

This feels like a text that I'll be returning to over and over at different stages of life. Highly recommended.

[Cheryl · Rating 4 out of 5]

I entrust myself, I entrust myself, to the Earth, to the Earth, and she entrusts herself to me. —Plum Village song

I cannot add more days to my life, but only more life to each day. —Plum Village song

May I open to this moment, just as it is
May my heart be at ease with
the conditions of my life
And when I rise, let me rise
Like a bird, joyfully
And when I fall, let me fall
Like a leaf, gracefully
Without regret

Read at the same time with several books about wisdom traditions, which felt like an extending mind exercise, weaving all these disparate threads or songs together into a symphony. The author was a Buddhist nun in Thich Nhat Hanh's Plum Village, and with his recent passing, I felt so joyful and filled by these teachings, like he was reaching out from eternity with the most beautiful wisdom through the author.

A key step that can help us begin to settle ourselves when we are profoundly unsettled is to come home, to ourselves, in this moment, whatever is happening. This is one way of speaking about mindfulness, or being present: coming home to ourselves.

I turned my attention more towards the Earth and knew I was also walking on cool streams of water flowing under me, and hot, fiery liquid deep below, in the center of the Earth. I imagined walking on the feet of those directly opposite us on the other side of the planet. The soles of my feet touched the soles of a little baby taking tentative steps, and a pregnant woman, and an old grandpa. My feet touched the feet of a lonely isolated person, and someone carried away by hatred and anger. I was also walking on the feet of someone who was right then doing walking meditation and enjoying the present moment. I was one with those walking the Earth whose hearts were filled with love and peace.

Thay (Thich Nhat Hanh) would often say, “Don’t try to figure out the answer by thinking about it.” In thinking over a question again and again, we do not generally arrive at real wisdom, but we easily tire ourselves out and get even more confused or anxious. These deeper life questions can’t be resolved at the level of the mind, but must be entrusted to a different, deeper part of our consciousness.

Ajahn Chah, the Thai Forest monk and teacher, asked his students one day when they passed a big boulder, “Do you think that boulder is heavy?” His students said, “Yes, it’s extremely heavy.” Then Ajahn Chah said, “Only if you try to pick it up!”

[Rachel Krantz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Besides having one of the best covers I’ve seen all year, this succinct book by meditation teacher Kaira Jewel Lingo is a practical and comforting manual for navigating a world falling apart. A close student of the late Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, she carries forth his teachings in a unique and fresh way, applying a contemporary social justice lens and her own experience as a Black woman. This is a highly practical little book for navigating times of transition (which is to say, every moment). I was particularly moved by the image of her description of walking meditation that I’ve quoted below. Like other practices in the book, I find myself returning to it. If you need a little hope right now — or simply some better coping mechanisms — this is a nourishing and easy summer read.

Quote: “Then I turned my attention more towards the Earth and knew I was also walking on cool streams of water flowing under me, and hot, fiery liquid deep below, in the center of the Earth. I imagined walking on the feet of those directly opposite us on the other side of the planet. The soles of my feet touched the soles of a little baby taking tentative steps, and a pregnant woman, and an old grandpa. My feet touched the feet of a lonely isolated person, and someone carried away by hatred and anger. I was also walking on the feet of someone who was right then doing walking meditation and enjoying the present moment. I was one with those walking the Earth whose hearts were filled with love and peace.”

[Miriam Hall · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this was a really solid beginner dharma book.

[Bookreporter.com Biography & Memoir · Rating 4 out of 5]

With the onset of the coronavirus pandemic, its stresses compounded (at least in the United States) by relentless political turmoil, there’s been no shortage of prescriptions for preserving one’s psychological well-being. Along with time-honored recommendations like exercise, good nutrition and adequate sleep, mental health professionals frequently have suggested beginning a meditation practice as a means of coping with COVID-induced stress. Anyone looking for a brief, accessible introduction to that practice, especially one geared to our current challenges, will appreciate Kaira Jewel Lingo’s WE WERE MADE FOR THESE TIMES: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption.

Lingo brings a unique set of credentials to her project. For 15 years, she experienced life as a nun under the tutelage of the eminent Zen Buddhist master Thich Nhat Hanh. At age 40, however, she made the difficult decision to leave the monastery, “reinventing my whole identity,” as she felt “something was calling to me that I couldn’t ignore.” Since that time, she has continued her engagement with mindfulness practice as a lay Dharma teacher, writer and activist in the United States and around the world.

Each of the chapters of Lingo’s concise book follows an identical structure, first addressing a cornerstone of mindfulness --- like acceptance, caring for strong emotions, or dealing with the reality of impermanence. She introduces some fundamental Buddhist teachings on these subjects, blending them with practical insights and, most usefully, wisdom gained from her own experience of practice.

These lessons are followed by brief guided meditations tailored to the chapter’s theme. (Readers who prefer the meditations with Lingo’s audio guidance can find them on the Insight Timer app in a course entitled “Skillfully Moving Through Challenging Times.”) But as any meditation practitioner knows (I’ve been one for more than six years), the most daunting task is transferring the benefits of sitting on the cushion into the reality of living.

Lingo helpfully bridges that gap with brief sections entitled “In Daily Life,” explaining how to integrate daily practice with one’s personal, family and work life, sometimes referred to as “short moments, many times” in mindfulness practice. In the chapter on impermanence, for example, she encourages readers to pay particular attention to the moments when they finish things --- whether it’s a meal, a conversation or sending an email. To counteract feelings of overwhelm, she recommends mindful walking. As readers will come to understand when they’ve finished the book, these frequent episodes of mindfulness are the bricks used to fashion a durable structure of awareness.

Along with these practices, Lingo promotes the practice of journaling. Each chapter concludes with an exercise, in the form of several journal prompts, intended to reinforce its central message. After discussing caring for strong emotions, she asks readers to consider writing about the ones they most often face, reflect on their habitual response to those emotions, and then express how it felt to approach that emotion with kindliness and friendliness, as described in that chapter’s meditation.

For all her emphasis on personal transformation, Lingo makes it clear that the journey she’s encouraging isn’t only an inward one. “Our personal challenges are not disconnected from the larger challenges and disruptions our world is facing right now,” she writes. “We cannot separate ourselves and be unaffected by the climate emergency, global health threats, growing income inequality, glaring racial wounds, and systemic white supremacy.”

While the road to building equanimity, compassion and resilience must begin with each individual, it most definitely does not end there. Anyone who wants to take the first steps on that journey will find Kaira Jewel Lingo an astute guide and worthy traveling companion.

Reviewed by Harvey Freedenberg

[Cocoa by candlelight · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first discovered Kaira Jewel Lingo two years ago during an online conference. There were so many great speakers, and I was feeling extremely overwhelmed. I gravitated towards her talk, thinking I will sample a few minutes here and there. Ended up watching all of it.
Cue to last Summer, I was travelling internationally for the first time since the pandemic. I was listening to her interview on the Lion's Roar podcast and watching the landscape fly by me. It had been a terrible holiday, where I went from stomach flu to Covid and ended up isolating the entire time. Somehow the emotional weight of all of that triggered a massive panic attack and I fainted. My flight got delayed while we waited for the ambulance right in front of the plane. And all the while I wondered how would I manage to get inside a small space and get myself back home. I remembered listening to Kaira just an hour before this whole ordeal and that gave me strength.
Three weeks ago I was in the middle of intense grieving and suffering. I bought this book and decided on reading one chapter a day to pace myself and give myself an anchor.
This is my advice to all potential readers.
Take it slow and fully immerse yourselves in her words. Let the words work inside of you, as opposed to you consciously trying to force meaning out of them.
This book is divided into ten chapters, each ending in a guided meditation, practical advice for your daily life, and a couple of journaling prompts. Please do them all. Don't just fly through the book.
You can read this as a CBT workbook or a spiritual workbook, or both. There is also a companion course (not free) which you can access here: https://insighttimer.com/meditation-c...
Don't let the page number fool you. There is so much insight here, that you can read this over and over again, which is exactly what I intend to do.
I want to thank Kaira Jewel Lingo for writing this, and for putting it out into the world and into my hands and heart.

[Rachel Krantz · Rating 5 out of 5]

This succinct book by meditation teacher Kaira Jewel Lingo is a practical and comforting manual for a world falling apart, in part because it points out that every moment is falling apart. Lingo is a close student of the late Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, and she carries forth his teachings in a unique and fresh way, applying a contemporary social justice lens and her own experience as a Black woman. This is a highly practical little book for navigating times of transition. I was particularly moved by the image of her description of walking meditation that I’ve quoted below. Like other practices in the book, I find myself returning to it. If you need a little hope right now — or simply some better coping mechanisms — this is a nourishing and easy summer read.

Quote: “These deeper life questions can’t be resolved at the level of the mind, but must be entrusted to a different, deeper part of our consciousness. Thay suggests we consider this big question as a seed, plant it in the soil of our mind, and let it rest there. Our mindfulness practice in our daily lives is the sunshine and water that the seed needs to sprout so that one day it will rise up on its own, in its own time. And then we’ll know the answer to our question without a doubt. But we must leave the seed down in the soil of our mind and not keep digging it up to see if it is growing roots. It won’t grow that way!

It is the same with a deep and troubling question. We ask our deeper consciousness to take care of it, and let go of our thinking and worrying about it. Then in our daily lives we practice calming, resting, and coming home to ourselves in the present moment, and that will help the seed of our question to ripen naturally and authentically. This process cannot be rushed or forced. It may take weeks, months, or years.”

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely adored this book. At first when I opened the parcel containing it, I was surprised and slighlty skeptical because of how thin it was. 'Could such a thin book really contain something of value?', I thought. My skepticism couldn't have been more misplaced.

While it indeed has few pages, Kaira Jewel Lingo has written a concise, meaningful book packed with wisdom and compassion. Each chapter has it's own theme and contains a mix of reflections, buddhist historical stories, thought-provoking quotes and personal anecdotes that manages the difficult task to be personal and still relevant. In the end of rhe chapter, there is one or more meditations as well as journaling questions about the theme and the experience of the meditation.

At first I was again skeptical against the usefulness of text-based meditations, but I was happily surprised by how well-written and easy the instructions were. They are a concise explanation of a practice that is simple yet powerful, rather than a set of steps or sentences to be memorized, and I have found myself being able to try them out in my daily life after a first read.

I absolutely loved this book. Within it is the voice of a inspiring spiritual teacher, uplifting, grounding and enlightening. I believe I will return to it over and over in times of transition and adversity!

[Stephen Wandro · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautiful compilation of Buddhist teachings that reminded me why I am so drawn to them. Very simply summarized as mindfulness, acceptance, and meditation. The teachings resonate so well for me, I think these ideas are truly the key to living a content life.

The meditations were quite nice, I have wanted to incorporate more meditation in my life, so I'm grateful that the book led me though some to hopefully start off the habit. I love the way meditation helps focus your awareness of your body, I found myself releasing tension in my jaw and neck that I didn't know I was carrying.

One idea I really liked was accepting uncertainty by viewing it as possibility. Another was the idea of "you are partly right". It can be your inner response to both compliments and criticism, to acknowledge our faults in the face of compliments and to ground our confidence in the face of criticism.

I have already found the book useful in everyday life. When feel any anxiety about the future, I breathe in "I have arrived" and breathe out "I am home", and I am brought into the present moment. When negative emotions arise, I can still be at peace. I can try to recognize and acknowledge them and say "hello embarrassment, I see you and acknowledge you".

So many other great Buddhist teachings, I'm grateful to have read this and aspire to incorporate them more into my life.

[Living My Best Book Life · Rating 4 out of 5]

We Were Made for These Times is a great read about learning to deal with all the changes that life throws our way. Kaira Jewel Lingo provides personal experiences and Buddhism teachings to give practical advice on how to stay relaxed and calm when changes happen. Many of us, including myself, stress so much about the changes that we go through. They can occur from a loss or a job change and that can cause so much friction and anxiety. So, the author provides great meditations and reflection time for readers to incorporate these teaching and methods into everyday life. I give We Were Made for These Times 4 stars. It's so peaceful and reminds us how to deal with change in a healthy and calming way.

[Kevin O'Donnell · Rating 3 out of 5]

Again, one of those meditative Buddhist books that didn't break any completely new ground, but provided good reminders amidst a very specific context.

I went into this book looking specifically for tools to help cope in the wake of big change (both personal and political), and I felt like everything I learned here was par for the course. The biggest aspects I enjoyed included:
-Letting big ideas ruminate in the subconscious (like watering a seed) to eventually find clarity/insight in a decision
-The idea that stepping back/detachment helps to accelerate your life much faster than trying to hold on
-Radical acceptance of all things

Honestly, the only thing I felt lacking was the absence of a more personal narrative. I think this author has a very specific, cool background and wish it was leveraged more to drive the structure of the book.

[Ruby Grad · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an important book, especially right now. Kaira Jewel Lingo has an extensive background as a Buddhist nun with Thich Nhat Hanh and as both a monastic and a lay Dharma teacher. In this gem of a book, she offers ten subjects and practices, all based on the Buddha's teachings, for working with our times of polycrises and challenges with great compassion and love. It is clear that she embodies what she teaches, and the stories, meditations, daily life practices and journal questions she offers with each subject can truly change us and strengthen our ability to be in our current world with strength and equanimity.

[Rachael · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a nourishing book with practices I will be continuing to engage with. Kaira’s way of writing/speaking is so comforting and supportive - she presents tools and understandings to us in an accesible and centered way. The earth-based mindfulness practices and connection to the way of Inter-Being in this book are powerful. I took my time reading it through to really absorb each chapter and practice. The songs were also a beautiful companion. Grateful for this book and eager to share it and engage with it all further.

[Jared Acker · Rating 5 out of 5]

I came across this book in a shop owned by a nautical woman on the docks of Maine. I picked it up and she said “I feel like this book was calling to you.” I bought it, brought it back home to Ohio with me, and just finished it at a time in my life where I’m going through some HUGE changes and disruptions. It couldn’t have found me at a better time and it’s wild how each chapter relates to some specific thing that I’m dealing with right now. I hope this book finds you when you need it most like it did for me.

[Norah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was lovely, and thoughtful, and gave me a lot to think about. I look forward to coming back to this book, and to some of the meditation and journaling exercises. As someone who is not religious but always looking for ways to connect more to the world, and perhaps to my own sense of spirituality or poetry, or whatever it is when we look into the heart of things and see more than just things--I very much appreciate the author's point of view, open-mindedness, and lack of dogma or judgment for other approaches, philosophies, or spiritual practices.

[Theresa · Rating 4 out of 5]

After a long hiatus, I finally finished this small little gem of a book. Kaira Jewel is a former Buddhist nun in the tradition of Tich Nat Han and now a lay meditation teacher. This book was complied from a course she has taught and is interactive in the sense that there are little prompts to journal, meditate. etc. I will read again and may even take the course through the Insight Timer app. I’ve heard her speak on the Ten Percent Happier App. She’s great.

[Lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think the subtitle is a little misleading, these are really beautiful lessons, but I was reading this with the intention of sharing with a friend whose child died and I think that kind of grief (combined with where they are in their grieving) was not the intention of this book. I am a nonmeditating Buddhist, the meditations were nice, but not necessarily for me. The second half was better than the first half.

[Catcurve · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful book perfect for this rough time were are going thru in 2023. Kaira Jewel Lingo is a jewel. She learned well from her guiding teacher, Thich Nhat Han , and you can hear his beautiful words in her voice. A real primer on how to deal with turbulant times. You should listen to the book to really enjoy. She sings a little song from plum village in each chapter. It is meant to be listened to many times to get the full teaching. Metta.

[Andrea Stoeckel · Rating 5 out of 5]

"We are the ones we've been waiting for"

In this timely book,Kaira Jewel Lingo takes the 10 lessons she taught at Plum Village: the Buddhist Monastery founded by the Venerable Thich Nhat Han and expand them into a book that you will return to again and again in times such as the ones we are living in.

Kaira Jewel Lingo takes us from feeling lost to being rooted and grounded in our own understandings. This is a book I will return to. Highly Recommended 5/5

[Kate Lawrence · Rating 5 out of 5]

Concise, well-written, and timely for facing, as the author puts it, "change, loss, and disruption." Her own life experience, of choosing to totally start over as a layperson after having been a Buddhist nun for 15 years, is used as the framework for these teachings. Both practical and inspiring; I know I'll go back and re-read some of these chapters.

[Aimee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Inspiration for troubling times. Kaira Jewel Lingo was a Buddhist monk at Plum Village for many years before leaving the monastery to open her teachings up to a larger audience. She is gentle, wise, experienced, and insightful. Whether "these times" troubling you are about society, climate, or the wars within your own world, there is plenty of peace and wisdom to be found in these pages.