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338 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 13, 2022
I think it’s a part of this life, Maddox. We’re able to save people because we’re able to take risks. We’re able to fight to save others, even if it means that sometimes we have to fight to stay alive.”
“We’re going to have to have a talk because this throuple shit is starting to feel more like a couple and less like a throuple,” Reggie says with his arms folded over his chest.
“We’re not a throuple.”
“What’s a throuple?” Maddox asks.
“Tell him it’s what we are when you wake up sandwiched between the two of us,” Reggie says. “You like it, don’t you? Smooshed between two ridiculously hot men.”
“It’s a disease,” I tell Maddox. “It starts by making you feel icky all the time, and then you start hearing this squeaky voice that assaults your ears and—”
Maddox nods as he looks over at me. “Ah, so Reggie but in disease form.”
“Both at the same time.”
“I wanna do both of you at the same time too,” Reggie says as he pops into the back seat.
“And I wanna watch,” Natalie says, appearing beside him.
“Yay, the back seat just turned into a shitshow,” I declare so Maddox can be aware of my pain.
“Why does Maddox put up with all of this from you? I used to have a lot of respect for him as a detective. He works hard, he’s extremely intelligent, and he’s phenomenal at what he does. Yet he falls for this conman shit you have going on? Is it just so he can get laid?”
“Definitely. During my teenage years I learned that the only way to hook people and get them to screw you was by claiming to see dead people. The moment I start preaching about dead people, men fall all over me instead of thinking I’m strange, a liar, or have some type of underlying illness. I mean, it got me Maddox, after all,” I say as dryly as I can.
“Ooh, burn, bitch, burn,” Reggie yells.
That’s the moment something slams against the window. I squeeze Maddox’s hand harder than I should as I leap in my seat. “Motherfucker,” I hiss as Spite, my ghost raven, flaps against the windshield like he can’t remember that he’s a fucking ghost that can go through walls.
“Did I just hit Reggie?” Maddox asks. “Please tell me I just hit Reggie.”
The sadistic side of me grins.
“Hiro!” Reggie yells, making me glance over at him. “Don’t be alarmed, but you are in the presence of a dick. When faced with a dick you must first back away slowly. If the dick tries to follow, you must use all force necessary. I will find you a weapon.” He rushes forward to a desk with a snow globe on it. “Might I recommend a snow globe for bludgeoning power?” He disappears and reappears on the other side next to a stapler. “A stapler for torture?” And then he’s back on the other side of the room. “Or simply a pen to stab with?”
This is my life. This is likely how I’m going to die. Half naked, lubed up, and with a bloody nose.
“You alright?” Maddox asks.
“Yep, splendid. I just wanted to caress the wall with my face before I never see it again,” I say as I push myself back up before wiping away the blood.