How To Break Your Own Heart

by Maggie Alderson

Alternate Cover Edition of ISBN 9780718104924

Genres: Chick Lit, Fiction, Romance, Audiobook

380 pages, Paperback

First published September 27, 2008

About the author

Maggie Alderson is a British-Australian author (that’s how I’m supposed to write it, but I’m not very good at talking about myself in the third person, so I’m going to can it).

I was born in London, brought up in rural Staffordshire, and educated at the University of St Andrews - and then at the University of Life, Sydney campus.

I spent many years covering the fashion shows in Paris, Milan, London etc which is the best people watching ever (I had to remind myself to look at the models…).

An obsessed bookworm since childhood, all I wanted to do from the age of six was write books. I also hoovered up every magazine and newspaper I could lay my hands on and by the time I was a teenager was determined to edit a magazine and be a newspaper columnist.

I have edited five magazines (including British ELLE) and my Style Notes column ran in the Good Weekend colour supplement for twelve years, as well as being syndicated to The Times.

My first novel Pants on Fire was published in 2000 and was a bestseller in the UK and Australia. I’ve written eight more novels since, which have been translated into many languages.

I’ve also published four collections of my columns and a children’s book called Evangeline, the Wish Keeper’s Helper, which was shortlisted for the Prime Minister’s Award in Australia.

My latest novel is called The Scent of You and is the story of perfume blogger Polly, facing up to a crisis in her marriage – and her sense of who she is - told through a filter of her obsession with perfumes (and also featuring very well dressed, seriously damaged, red-hot men, which are my speciality).

The book was inspired by attending perfume events in London and realising just how many fascinating people there are in that world (and a fair few brilliant nutters).

You can read my heroine's blog fragrantcloud.net

Reviews

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amelia Bradlow has been married to Ed for fifteen years. When Amelia's friend Kiki asks her why she and Ed sleep in separate beds, Amelia is stumped. Kiki's question forces Amelia to take a long, hard look at her marriage and what it has become. Not only that but up re-appears Joseph Hardwick, the first boy Amelia kissed, and she finds she's still attracted to him. Will Amelia stick with Ed or will she take a chance for Joseph?

Having enjoyed Maggie Alderson's previous books, Mad About The Boy and Handbags and Gladrags, I was really looking forward to Maggie's newest book How To Break Your Own Heart. Maggie offered me the chance to read it and after waiting a loooong time, the book finally arrived. I started it almost straight away and was quickly caught up in Amelia's life. How To Break Your Own Heart is a similar plot to most chick lit books, woman wants a baby but her husband doesn't, but Maggie deals with it in an enjoyable way.

The book starts with the question, "Do you always sleep in separate beds?" and I was easily sucked in. Kiki's question wasn't her being nosey, I don't think, but more her being curious as to why a couple, married for 15 years, slept in separate beds. It was an interesting way to start the book, I have to say and it gives us the plot of the whole book in one single sentence; I don't mean that in a bad way, either. We're quickly introduced to Amelia and over the first few chapters we find out just how Amelia and Ed met, in France, and it was quite a romantic story, actually. I loved hearing how he'd practically whisked her away from where she was staying and they then roamed around the French countryside visiting vineyards. I could feel Ed's passion for wine and see how easily Amelia fell in love with him. Maggie then brings us back to the present day and I can also, sort of, see how Amelia and Ed have fallen into a rut; sleeping in separate beds in separate bedrooms, Amelia tiring of the whole wine thing, and then the big one: Amelia wanting a child. It's pretty obvious from the off that Amelia would like a child but I thought Ed explained himself well when saying he didn't want children and of what we learn from his childhood, you can kind of see why.

It's Kiki, Amelia's new friend, who really brightens up Amelia's life. You can see that instantly. Kiki changes the way Amelia feels about herself, she brings Amelia's sparkle back and she also, in her own way, is the catalyst for Amelia's career-change. Amelia might be the one narrating the story to us but it's Kiki who brings the whole thing to life. She's loud, she could potentially get on your nerves, but she's also a really great friend. I could see why Ed wasn't a fan of Kiki though; after all, she was changing the image and total persona of the woman he loved and he could do little about it, but I myself loved Kiki. Everything she does for Amelia is for Amelia's own good whether Amelia or Ed see it that way or not.

I liked Amelia immediately but I felt she was incredibly subservient as the book wore on; letting Ed pretty much tell her what to do. Ed was by no means controlling but I could see he thought Amelia should act in a certain way. Amelia also let Kiki steamroller her into her new career, as well as having a total image overhaul, and while that was great for Amelia, she also came across as a bit of a pushover. I liked Amelia, don't get me wrong I just wish she had more of a backbone. I was surprised to find I actually quite liked Ed; he never once said he may change his mind about having a child and I don't see why Amelia never brought it up during their 15 years of marriage, how can you even marry someone without knowing their stance on bringing a child into the world? Yes, Ed was a bit snobby and annoying but I felt he genuinely loved Amelia in his own quirky way. I was probably the only one hoping for a happy ending between the two. As I said before, I loved Kiki. She carried the story for me and it was rare for Amelia to not mention her. I looked forward to reading what on Earth she did next and loved how she roped Amelia into de-cluttering her house and thus sent Amelia onto her new career path. Because Joseph Renwick was barely featured in the book up until the last quarter I can't really say what I thought of him. If I had to at a push I'd say I wasn't really a huge fan of him; probably because I liked Ed but also because as I said, he was barely in the book and Amelia and he rarely had any conversations with each other until the last quarter of the book. He was in the first three-quarters of the book but more as a passenger than a story-changer. There were a few other characters in the book; Oliver, Amelia and Kiki's gay friend, Hermione, Amelia's elderly next door neighbour in Winchelsea whom I adored, Sonny, Amelia and Hermione's gardener in Winchelsea, Dick, Amelia's brother as well as Amelia's parents, I liked Amelia's mother but couldn't stand her father, he was really quite mean.

Kiki also has a secret which is incredibly sad, which adds to the seriousness of the book. As I mentioned above, Amelia's father is kind of mean. He came across as controlling and, although it's never mentioned, I'd have thought maybe a bit violent. I wish we'd had a scene in the book where Amelia or Dick stood up to him, I felt like he needed to be told a few home truths. He was truly repulsive.

I did enjoy the book, don't get me wrong, but for me it wasn't as good as Mad About The Boy. Amelia was likeable enough, absolutely, but I ended up getting annoyed at her as the book drew to a close and she still couldn't/wouldn't make her mind up. I also don't get the fact that after 15 years of marriage she wasn't aware her husband didn't want children. The book was well written, though, which can always make a book more enjoyable. Maggie's writing seems to flow easily so her books are incredibly easy to get into. It's just a shame I didn't enjoy it as much as I wanted to.

[Tricia · Rating 2 out of 5]

When a woman, who has been happily married for 15 years, realises that her husband can't give her what she wants, what should she do? Should she stay or leave to pursue her own happiness.

I found myself very frustrated with the main character and felt she bought a lot of the problems on herself. i felt that a lot of the issues she had a problem with should have been raised with her husband long before that point. Making out like the husband was selfish for not giving her a child when he was very upfront at the start that he never wanted children was very unfair. I actually felt sympathy for the husband because it seemed like he was blindsided.

I can see why people did enjoy the book but I felt it only really showed her side and I think it would have been a lot better if the showed a number of different perspectives on this issue.

[Susanne Mills · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved this. I went through a similar experience but decided to stay with my husband and be grateful for our two girls.

I wish we could have seen 5 years after the events though (won’t spoil it) and seen what her life was, see if she was happy or regretted her choices. But maybe the author is planning another book!? I hope so :)

[Felicity Waterford · Rating 4 out of 5]

A solid 7/10. Great holiday read. Thanks Jo

[Amanda Woolley · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this one to be an average read that held my interest but was easy to put down when required. The story was easy to follow and seemed like it could have been a realistic situation to be in.

[Rebecca Clarkson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Of vs off. Not that hard. Was her editor awol?

[Kim Stone · Rating 5 out of 5]

Listened to the audio book. The narrator was amazing and brought this story to life. New to me author. I enjoyed this story of discovery.

[Bec S · Rating 3 out of 5]

Disappointed in the neatness of the ending, easy holiday read

[Deense · Rating 4 out of 5]

Maggie Alderson is one of my favourite authors, I'll be frank. How To Break Your Own Heart was a plot line that was close to my heart. The story of a woman in a marriage that isn't meeting all of her needs, I could identify with both her, and the rest of the characters in the book. Kiki the loud and confident Australian with a secret of her own. Dickie the brother who'd rather drink than deal with his problems. Ed, the husband who has a particular way about him. It draws them together, and is a story about growth, change and taking chances.

In the 'chick-lit' fild as it's called, there's so much dross. Then there's books that realise the characters wonderfully and tell a good story. I'm very glad to say this is one of the latter.

[Sandysbookaday (taking a step back for a while) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amelia Bradlow seems to have it all....a handsome wealthy husband, a beautiful home, good looks and a glamorous job. She has everything she wants, except the thing she wants the most - a baby.
Ed, her husband, is funny affectionate and sophisticated, but won't budge on his stance on parenthood.
So what is Amelia to do - stay in her nearly perfect marriage - or risk the single life with the possibility that at 37, she is running out of time to meet and mate for life.
There is far more to this book than is initially apparent.
It deals with friendship and jealousy, love and manipulation, fear and change, the need to listen and to learn.
I give this book 3 1/2 stars.

[Tamara · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have mixed feelings about this book, it’s probably rated a 3.5. It’s an easy comfortable read with engaging characters. I like most of the storylines and it’s interesting watching the main characters develop, however there is some really forced drama particularly at the end. I also find it really frustrating the lack of important communication happening within the main couple. People do avoid having these big conversations, it’s not that it’s not true to some but doesn’t make it less frustrating!

[Tracy · Rating 1 out of 5]

What happened to Maggie Alderson - this book was just awful. It lacked the wittiness of her previous novels.

Read the full www.ourbookclub.net.au review at How To Break Your Own Heart

[BlueSky · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good holiday read. You might want to kill Amelia's husband Ed, though. Suggest you read with a good chocolate supply to distract you from any violent inclinations.

[Renae · Rating 3 out of 5]

I get a bit sick of the predictability of Maggie Alderson's books. They're a fun read, however each book has the same set of characters, just different names and jobs.

[Ali · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perfect holiday reading, while actually managing to touch on some serious issues. Well developed characters, story line and London setting.

[Ruth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read via borrowbox

Amelia is married to Ed and she has been for a lovely 15 years. They have a scheduled life of eating out, going to France, having sex on a Sunday and of course work. Until Amelia begins to make some new friends who show her what life in your 30's can really be like. Will Amelia choose her solid and scheduled life with Ed or choose the path her friends are taking of drinking, shopping and fun?

This book does exactly what it says on the tin. Although there are some emotional subjects included in this book such as narcissistic tendencies, rape, mental health, infertility, as well as death amongst other things. Each of these subjects are very mentioned or hinted at but not delved into so do not loose the romcom feel.

The character growth for Amelia is absolutely beautiful. You see her going from a wife who just follows her husbands needs to a single lady who is self sufficient both financially and emotionally.

[Tara Byrne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amelia has a life most would envy. Although her husband Ed is a little different and very set in his ways, she has a marriage filled with love and the added comfort of a luxurious lifestyle thanks to Ed’s very successful career in the wine industry. There is one glaring issue for Amelia, she is almost 37 and desperately wants a child but Ed shuts her down every time she broaches the topic. Amelia has a new friend in Kiki, the bubbly Australian party girl who opens her eyes to a world including a lucrative new business venture.
As Amelia navigates her complicated marriage, her new friendship circle and career as well as connecting with an old flame, she is conflicted about what it takes to be truly happy.
An easy, somewhat predictable read. ‘How to Break Your Own Heart’ is the perfect, lazy holiday read.

[Ornella · Rating 2 out of 5]

Entertaining read if you're unable to sleep, or need an intellectual break. But goodness they really go to town on the slut shaming (it was appalling). Also, ridiculously boring and predictable ending.

[Wide Eyes, Big Ears! · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gosh, I loved this! Amelia is stuck. She loves her husband but things aren’t progressing. With the help of socialite, Kiki, hairdresser to the stars, Oliver, and handsome childhood friend, Joseph, Amelia seeks to break free. A great heroine, some fun supporting characters, and an interesting story.

[Bec · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve come to realise that English (UK) novels are either cosy sweet reads you can happily lend to your grandma or more Bridget Jones don’t pass onto granny books 🤭 this one was definitely more Bridget but still quiet funny and just a little heartbreaking but with a (kind of) happy ending

[Josephine · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars-there were some nice twists and turns, interesting storyline, easy to read, but not extraordinary

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lightweight but it kept me entertained. I love that British understated humor. I’d recommend it for a summer read

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it. Easy chick read.

[Claire · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy entertainment with colorful characters and themes that most women will find relatable.

[Nina W · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fine. Standard romance which dealt with some complex feelings which was good but still tired up in a happily-ever-after bow

[Joanne Osborne · Rating 4 out of 5]

A holiday read… an interesting story and characters
Kept me guessing about the ending right to the end!

[Madiha · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun and light-hearted read, but the main character was a bit... well, it was weird that she was almost 37 and didn't know the things she didn't know, and acted like a teenager in most situations.

[Pip Snort · Rating 2 out of 5]

I found this story remote and shallow. While I had some sympathy for Amelia and her relational convolution this book peddled the same tired and meaningless answers as our wider culture has been selling for years, and they continue to be pretty worthless. That tainted the otherwise decent writing and thoughtful plot creation. It was also, no doubt because of the above, a bit boring overall.

[Elena · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Sag mal, schlaft ihr immer in getrennten Betten?” lautet der erste Satz des Buches und bildet einen interessanten Auftakt zu einen Buch, das hält, was es verspricht. Das Leben der Ich-Erzählerin Amelia wird durch ihre neue Freundin Kiki ordentlich durcheinander gewirbelt. Hatte Amelia es sich doch in ihrer Beziehung mit ihren Ehemann Ed bequem eingerichtet. Doch Kiki sorgt dafür, dass Amelia endlich ihr Leben in die Hand nimmt und ihr klar wird, was sie wirklich will. Mit von der Partie sind Kikis schwuler Freund Oliver, die freundliche Nachbarin Hermione mit den grünen Daumen, der höchstattraktive Gärtner Sonny, ihr Bruder Dick - und natürlich Joseph.

Auf den ersten fünfzig Seiten geht es zunächst nach den Auftakt mit der Beziehungsgeschichte von Amelia und Ed weiter, ehe die Story richtig Fahrt aufnimmt und klar wird, wie Amelia zum Aufräumen kommt. Die Geschichten um ihre Kunden sind höchstamüsant und auch ansonsten versteht das Buch zu unterhalten. Das ein oder andere Klischee schlägt voll zu, wird aber erfrischend dargestellt. Die Charaktere machen die Geschichte liebenswert und so fliegen einen die Seiten nur so durch die Hand.

Ich habe dieses Buch zufällig beim Stöbern nach Chick lit entdeckt und aufgrund des Klappentextes zugegriffen, welcher mich nicht enttäuscht hat. Wer Kerstin Gier und Sophie Kinsella mag, wird dieses Buch verschlingen – ich hatte es unter der Woche binnen drei Tagen ausgelesen und das nur durch Cafés und Zug. Leider ist bisher noch fast nichts von der Autorin übersetzt worden – aber das kann sich noch ändern. Meine Erwartungen an ein Buch dieses Genres wurden voll erfüllt.