Mi retorcido mundo

by Elliot Rodger

Horrifying explanation and rationalization of Elliot Rodgers actions, written by himself. This was what he left behind after “The Day of Retribution”. To read it search up “Elliot Rodger manifesto pdf”.

Genres: Nonfiction

260 pages, Paperback

Published January 1, 2021

Reviews

[mari · Rating 1 out of 5]

this is so funny to read if your are drunk

[B. Korda · Rating 1 out of 5]

Fucking loser

[erixo]

y pq no se volvió gay, yo si me lo hubiera chapado

[mi li · Rating 3 out of 5]

Uno de los libros más complicados y difíciles de leer que he leído. Su complejidad no se basa en una cuestión gramatical, sino en la manera en que Elliot Rodger narra su manifiesto.

Es imposible no sentirse, hasta cierto punto, identificado con alguna situación o secuencia que es narrada. Y es justamente en ese momento cuando el autor se aprovecha de la vulnerabilidad del lector para introducir uno de sus múltiples mensajes de odio.

Si van a leer el libro por curiosidad, recomiendo que se tomen pausas para desconectarse del contenido, ya que puede resultar muy pesado. Más que un libro difícil por su lenguaje, es difícil por el efecto psicológico que puede producir en quien lo lee

[Abigail Heron · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read this in its entirety in April 2023 because I’ve been knowing ball.

[Joseph Sang · Rating 5 out of 5]

those who make fun of elliot and treat his manifesto as joke has never known how it feels to be truly lonely

[Antony Monir]

This is just sad to read. I recommend this article, telling parts of the story from Rodger’s mom’s perspective:

https://www.motherjones.com/criminal-...

[Bogum Balls · Rating 1 out of 5]

really sad

[Marco Strijker · Rating 2 out of 5]

Really interesting, yet not well-written and lacks any true depth

[Joshua · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars — I cannot give it more than 3.

Recently, I became interested in the life of Elliot Rodger and why he committed the Isla Vista mass murder on his self-declared day of “retribution.”

Let me begin with this: My Twisted World is not a well written autobiography. Although Rodger describes his life in detail, the work lacks the polish quality one would expect from either non-fiction or fiction. Given the circumstances under which the document was produced (Rodger was actively planning his mass murder, devoted most of his energy to it AND throw his depression and anti-social behavior into the mix) one can hardly expect a carefully crafted literary work. At the same time, I doubt that even under normal circumstances he would have been capable of writing a strong autobiography without years of training and extensive interest in guidance from a professional editor. This guy is way to narcissistic to learn from someone else's point of view.

For me, the relevant question is therefore not whether it is well written (it-is-not) but how and why Rodger came to the conclusion to commit atrocity's as his last act of defiance against the world that gave him life.
Since the text cannot be separated from the terror he carried out in 2014, it seems more meaningful to read this document not as a literary work, but as a psychological and semi-ideological document, written from the perspective of someone who suffers from a severely distorted and morally compromised mindset. The central question then becomes: how and why did he do this?

Approached in this way, the document gains a different kind of value. Rodger recounts his entire life story (in painful repetitive detail) up to the day of his so-called “retribution,” which gains us insight into his deeply distorted worldview as it develops over the years. It also becomes increasingly more and more dominant as his narration progresses and how it influences his life and everyone around him. His thinking gradually permeates the text to such an extent that it cannot be separated from it without rendering the whole incoherent.

The work serves as a clear example of someone unable to empathize with others or accept that others may hold different perspectives. Grandiosity, victimhood, and catastrophic thinking run throughout his work. He attributes thoughts and intentions to others and constructs enemies from anyone that ''opposes'' him in someway, as in the case of his stepmother. Reading through the lines - and the sheer hatred he feels for her - she actually sounds more reasonable and supportive than the evil antagonist he makes her out to be.

His life appears to be heavily driven by his desire for intimate sexual contact, while he simultaneously seems incapable of recognizing that many of his problems are deeply rooted in his own personality. His patterns of thought shape his entire worldview and continously reinforce themselves, so that every rejection or disappointment further radicalizes his beliefs.

I do not feel sympathy for what happened to Rodger. What I do believe is that this document offers insight into how and why someone can descend into such actions. My sympathy lies with the victims and with those who, in their own lives, have to deal with people who share characteristics of Elliot Rodger's.
I wish his family the best...

[PatiPat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Este manifiesto, no es un libro como tal. Para quien no conozca a Elliot Rodger, es un joven real que en 2014, a los 22 años, cometió lo que se conoce como la masacre de Isla Vista (EEUU) donde asesinó a 6 personas, hirió a otras 14 y finalmente se suicidó. Además, su figura sirve como precedente del movimiento "Incel", "blackpill", "manosfera" y similares, siendo un referente para otros asesinos en masa jóvenes que cometen masacres en sus institutos.
En este manifiesto que escribió poco tiempo antes de cometer la masacre, explica su vida desde su perspectiva, empezando por la niñez hasta su muerte de manera autobiográfica, junto con una serie de vídeos borrados que subió a youtube. A nivel académico y criminológico, es un texto de 300 páginas valioso para entender procesos de radicalización y violencia misógina.
Elliot, creía merecer afecto, sexo, admiración y estatus social sin esfuerzo sólo por considerarse superior a los demás, pero al mismo tiempo mostraba un complejo de inferioridad enorme al ser de raza mixta, tímido, más bajito y débil físicamente que los demás. Al no obtener estos objetivos, concluye que el sistema está roto y el problema lo tienen las mujeres que no saben elegir correctamente a los hombres. Elliot empieza a ver a las mujeres como personas cuya única utilidad es la belleza y el sexo, cosificándolas totalmente, y no como individuos autónomos con capacidad de decisión. En las últimas páginas, aparecen fantasías violentas sobre controlar a las mujeres y sus decisiones. Elliot se considera especial y se siente humillado por no recibir reconocimiento, siendo culpa de otros esa falta de reconocimiento. Está obsesionado con el estatus social, y siempre ve a los demás hombres como competencia.
Los temas centrales son el victimismo extremo, sentimiento de derecho, misoginia, obsesión con el estatus, narcisismo, soledad, racismo, inestabilidad familiar y radicalización progresiva hasta el día de la "retribución". Además, bajo mi total punto de vista, es una persona con claros rasgos autistas. No necesariamente tiene por qué cumplir todos los puntos como para ser reconocido clínicamente como tal pero es más que evidente los rasgos que tiene en común con el autismo.
A nivel literario, no está tan mal teniendo en cuenta que no es escritor, aunque desde la mitad hacia delante es muy repetitivo.
En conclusión, es interesante de leer si estás interesado en la psicología criminal y estás familiarizado con la masacre de Isla Vista. Permite entender mejor la mente de asesinos en masa y movimientos radicalizados.

[Liechmi · Rating 3 out of 5]

My Twisted World by Elliot Rodger reads more like an autobiography than a traditional book. Roughly 40% of it covers his life from birth to age 18, while the rest focuses on the years leading up to age 22.

The writing itself is unsettling, mainly because it gives direct insight into his mindset. As the story progresses, his thinking becomes increasingly disturbing and filled with resentment. In the epilogue, his views become especially extreme, he expresses deep hatred toward women, even suggesting ideas that echo authoritarian and violent ideologies for example (putting them into concentration camps and removing their right to choose a mate). He portrays women in a dehumanizing way and frames his frustrations as something the world has unfairly imposed on him.

Overall, the book is disturbing but also revealing in terms of understanding his psychology. It’s not something I would “enjoy” in the usual sense, but it does offer a chilling look into a deeply troubled mind. I gave it 3 stars on Goodreads because, while it’s difficult to read, it is undeniably compelling from a psychological perspective.

[Emma]

what a crazy crazy thing to experience. still is equally crazy that i am able to log this here on goodreads lol

i've been grotesquely invested in and morbidly fascinated by incel culture (as an opponent, let me make that clear!!) for years now, so i'm almost surprised that it's taken me this long to read elliot's manifesto in full. it is wilder, weirder, and worse than i could've expected. most bizarrely, elliot documents exactly one (1) occasion throughout his entire post-pubescent life in which he attempts to speak to a girl. he says, and i quote, 'hi'. not to trivialise this immense tragedy but yeah, you're probably not going to have much luck getting with girls if you try to converse with them exactly once in nine years.

not sure what else there is to say on this. all of this could so easily have been avoided (elliot!!!! go up and talk to people!!!!), but it's impossible to feel any morsel of sympathy towards him in that case. just a vile, vile, vile being and a mortifying act of terrorism.

[scourgemarx · Rating 3 out of 5]

read this book last year I think or at least thats when I downloaded the PDF. not a good guy in the slightest. he was a rich prick, far right, and a murderer. at the same time i'd hate to be living in his household. as someone with autism I feel I understand why he felt the need to fit in, why he stayed unemployed and socially awkward, and why his life spiraled out of control the way it did. terrible person at the same time I think society churns out elliot rodgers and Luigi mangionies in the thousands and I think that sucks.

[Raquel]

I don’t think a rating applies here. I feel empathy and sympathy for his loneliness and struggles at times, but it’s hard to truly have compassion for a racist, proudly white supremacist, sexist, do-nothing with no work ethic, an overinflated sense of entitlement and a shitty attitude. And then, of course, he murdered people out of a misplaced sense of Justice.

[M T · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very disturbing book written in a way that's very eye opening, really made me understood what it's like to be in the mind of someone very disturbed, a good book if you read it in the lense of how not to live your live and what not to do when facing challenges.

[Kira Harper · Rating 1 out of 5]

kissless virgin

[Sofa the first]

no.

[Qaisién · Rating 4 out of 5]

The last page got me

[Gustavus Adolphus · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hero, if more people were like you we wouldn't be in this mess.

[Leah]

It is interesting because at some points you can almost feel as though he’s reaching self awareness and then he falls right back on his face and doubles down.

He’s also not a very good writer.

It was interesting to read nonetheless

[Alpha Q]

For someone who allegedly had little grasp on reality by the end of his life (as apparent from his vlogs), the manifesto is surprisingly articulate. What stood out most to me was his ability to revisit childhood memories and reconstruct them so vividly for the reader.

In my opinion, he doesn’t come across as particularly narcissistic either, at least not in the cartoonish way people frame him. He’s painfully aware of many of his own shortcomings. Those “I’m magnificent” inner monologue bits land more like cope than genuine grandiosity.
He also comes across as someone fundamentally unequipped for social reality.
Classic poorly masking autist: absolute dogshit at deception, social calibration, and reading the game. So he self-sabotages nonstop while simultaneously obsessing over the systems excluding him.

One thing I rarely see discussed is his fixation on winning the lottery. The repeated cycle of hope and disappointment feels psychologically important. He seemed extremely receptive to disneypilled ideas: law of attraction, destiny, luck, cosmic reward for suffering, etc.
Even after repeated failures, he still seemed to believe the universe would eventually “settle the score” and reward him for enduring.

It's essentially the same pattern as religious belief, except religion has built-in coping armor through ideas like “everything happens for a reason” or divine timing to cushion the blows, whereas a secularized version of that belief leaves you exposed. The highs become addictive because they feel like proof the universe is finally turning in your favor, but the lows become psychologically annihilating because there’s no larger framework left to contain them.

This deprivation he imposed upon himself eventually seems to transcend its original object. By the end, it no longer feels strictly about sex or companionship. Those became proxies for something larger: exclusion itself. The external reminders of what he lacked appear to have gradually consumed his entire worldview until the deprivation became existential rather than interpersonal.

One quote that stuck with me:
"..it makes me think ominously of the fact that all children, boys and girls, start out the same. We all start out innocent, and we all start out together. Only through the experiences and circumstances of growing up do we drift apart, form allegiances, and face each other as enemies."

Honorable mention: "I felt extremely gratified at walking on the black carpet with fathe and Soumaya, and I cockily smiled at all of the stupid fans who had to remain on the side, rubbing it right in their faces. There were some actors and celebrities on the carpet with us, and the paparazzi yelled at me a few times to get out of the way as they were taking pictures of some cunt actress. I discreetly gave those paparazzi pigs my middle finger. Elliot Rodger will not move aside for a stupid, good-for-nothing, over-glorified actress, whoever the fuck she was. I didn't see."

[Pani Baki · Rating 4 out of 5]

Es un gran libro, muy recomendable. Realmente apoyo la decisión su decisión de cometer una masacre, ya que al final, acabas empatizando con él, y te das cuenta de que lo hace por motivos de justicia personal.
Incluso, aunque no seas un terrorista, es un buen libro porque al observar lo que le pasa a otra persona desde fuera. Podemos darnos cuenta de nuestras propias distorsiones cognitivas, y como muchas veces nos quejamos por cosas inherentes a la vida.
En general, es un libro complejo como lo es el ser humano. Por una parte empatizas con él. El pobre Elliot pasa por un montón de mudanzas, bullying, el divorcio de sus padres, alcoholismo, una aterradora soledad, todo hasta el punto de volverlo completamente loco. Y por otra parte, da rabia ver como se queja de no tener dinero cuando es una persona muy adinerada, o como cuando se queja de no tener amigos pero no hace nada al respecto (aunque sea por su propia incapacidad).
Para mí, debería ser una lectura obligatoria, y un ejemplo de una tragedia que se podría haber evitado si se prestase atención al bullying y a la salud mental.