Once Upon a Crime

Detective Roger LeCarre #1

by Fergus Craig

Exeter: a city in decline, East Devon's capital of crime.

Detective Roger LeCarre: a man on a quest to rid the world of crime (starting with Devon and Cornwall and then working outwards) so he can concentrate on his watercolours.

LeCarre runs 10km a day but probably burns more calories shaking his head at what has become of his city. Now Exeter is set to become the UK Capital of Culture and the ambitious Lord Mayor wants to turn things around. But when a young man's (dead) body is found in the centre of town, things get murky.

Detective Roger LeCarre is a character never seen before in modern fiction - a tough but troubled detective with a drink problem and a marriage in trouble. Can he find out who killed the young man, save the city and change his energy provider before the new more expensive tariff kicks in?

Filled with drama, eroticism and very specific Wikipedia-sourced information on Devon, Once Upon A Crime is a thriller which demands to be read.

Genres: Fiction, Crime, Mystery, Humor, Audiobook, Comedy, Murder Mystery

Audiobook

Published October 19, 2021

Reviews

[Nigel · Rating 2 out of 5]

Detective Roger LeCarre is the best policeman in Exeter - indeed in the South West of England - at least in his opinion. He is a troubled character with a drink problem and a marriage that seems to be going wrong. However he has a murder to solve so other things pale into insignificance for him. Drugs are widely available in Exeter so this could be a drugs related crime. The book follows his investigation and his life at this point in time.

Over the years I have read a number of crime books that are also comedic and generally enjoyed them. I'm from the Westcountry too so this one look as though it might work for me. I confess I very nearly gave up around 20% in. I found this a strange book really. There is little doubt to me that some of the humour would probably be offensive to some people. There was a bizarre amount of "product placement" to me. The brand and spec of his phone and his car and its abilities, the fact that Exeter people loved the food at M&S, his fitbit and the like. His use of Burts Bees Lip Balm was literally off the wall. I don't recall ever reading anything that had such a brand awareness aspect and it did nothing for me.

Maybe it was just me but some aspects didn't feel like that had been well thought through. That LeCarre is intended as an anachronism is fine so at one point he is introduced to Google his partner (!!). Not long after that he heads for his "favourite comparison website" to change his energy contract (& yes we do get told just how much he saves and with who). This struck me as odd.

I guess there is always a fine line to tread using clichéd characters. LeCarre is a clichéd character on steroids really. For me this approach has gone too far in this book. The crime comedy ones that I have read and enjoyed have been crime stories that have had some humour in them. In this one the humour buries the story fairly effectively for me - it is simply too heavy handed with the humour. I'm not really sure who the target audience is here. Crime lovers will be put off by the comedy I think so maybe it's for fans of rather robust humour.


Note - I received an advance digital copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for a fair review

[Scott · Rating 5 out of 5]

I honestly don't think I have laughed more to an audiobook before. The ridiculous Detective Roger Le Carre and the insanity of this fictionalised Exeter are utterly hilarious.

Will this win the next Booker Prize? No. Did it consistently make me laugh out loud, poke fun at the ridiculous stereotypes of thriller novels and make me still want a whole bunch more? Absolutely.

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

If the words "hello Marcus, it's your father" mean nothing to you, let me give you a bit of context. Fergus Craig is an observant, witty writer who has created a close-to-the-bone parody of a narrow-minded, middle class, suburban English dad. This character, Martin Fishback, is convinced of his own rightness, his own intelligence, and that his son has made a poor choice in attending Leicester De Montfort University. And now Martin has written a book.

I say this because you really need to know that level of abstraction. The narrative voice is blind to its own flaws, and that's the fun of it, but the ignorance-born racism and sexism definitely veers into uncomfortable at times, even if you're in on the joke.

Overall, it's a hilarious paint by numbers crime novel in which the lead detective, Roger LeCarre, drinks whatever can be drunk, chases every flimsy lead he gets, and gets uncontrollably angry at the mere mention of Drugs - when he isn't listing suspects, theories, or furniture he's had sex on in his head.

I recommend getting the audiobook. The delivery is, in my view, an essential part of the experience. From Detective Roger LeCarre's opening observations of a Body, and frequent musings on Crime, through to the terms and conditions at the end (THE MORAL RIGHT OF THE AUTHOR HAS BEEN ASSERTED 😡😡), this is a joyfully silly tribute to the ludicrous overconfidence of mediocre white men everywhere. (Author, I am still talking about Martin here).

I enjoyed every moment. Whether a Roger LeCarre sequel is on the cards, or whether "Martin Fishback" (and, by extension, Fergus Craig) will turn his hand to romance or sci-fi, I don't know. I will absolutely be reading it in any case.

[Shona · Rating 4 out of 5]

Once I realised the elevator pitch for this book is essentially "what if Alan Partridge decided to write a novel about himself as a detective?" it clicked for me.

[Rachel Wiltshire · Rating 1 out of 5]

Very poor, don't waste your time.

[Stephen the Bookworm · Rating 3 out of 5]

First and foremost this is a comedy book that happens to involve crime not a crime novel with a comedic twist ( such as Richard Osman, Ian Moore, Robert Thorogood). Not knowing the comedy work of Fergus Craig, this was unchartered territory. So was it funny… in many ways, the book felt like a written version of comedy tv series ( I could imagine the BBC3 or sky version) . Yes, there were some very funny one liners. The key protagonist Roger Lecarre seemed like a stereotype from a 70s tv show - no understanding of modern systems, a one man crime crusader and bordering on offensive ( angry at his wife for having an affair but it was ok for him to have sex when he wanted) and somehow at 45 he seemed too young to have these attributes.The plot based in Exeter and drug culture ( even including a surreal trip to New York) had to be taken with a pinch of salt as it was not too tricky to see who the guilty person was .The inclusion of Josh Widdicome as a character seemed a bit too matey and a joke within the comedy circle. I’m not sure who would be the demographic for this book … but if you want a comedy read about murder and drug wars in “the dark streets “of Exeter then this might be for you.

Thank you to NetGalley for the advance preview.

[Carolina · Rating 2 out of 5]

Reading this book was like watching the telly… ads every 5 minutes. Knowing the brand of everything used in the story, from the car the character drove to the lip balm he used was unnecessary and made the reading of the book tiring.

The storyline of the murder case had a great potential, although it felt like it was ruined by the main character. I found it very hard to like the detective even one bit, and the plot at the end of the book just felt so unreal.

It was a quick but bit of a tiring read.

[Jamie Bowen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Exeter, a hotbed of crime, and only one man can save the day….Detective Roger LeCarre, a man on a mission. When a body turns up, Exeter’s plans to be Capital of Culture are in danger. Roger is your man to get it sorted.

Very funny, utterly bonkers and most enjoyable. A great new addition to crime literature.

[Elaine Tomasso · Rating 2 out of 5]

I would like to thank Netgalley and Little, Brown Book Group for an advance copy of Once upon a Crime, the first comic crime novel to feature Detective Roger LeCarre set in Exeter.

LeCarre has to investigate the murder of 19 year old Charlie Fade and solve it quickly before it affects the tourist industry.

I am obviously not the target audience for this novel , too old and too female, because I didn’t find it funny and I think I missed many of the references. The novel is full of product placement that I assume is supposed to say something about the characters, but means absolutely nothing to me as I don’t care which phone or car LeCarre has and don’t have the knowledge to know why his choices are funny.

Roger LeCarre is stupid and obnoxious by design and it’s laid on with a trowel. I’m sure that this will amuse some readers, but I found him hard going, unsubtle and annoying. Yes, I know it’s a spoof so I don’t expect him to be likeable but a bit of nuance wouldn’t have gone amiss, or is that in the product placement I didn’t get?

So I didn’t get the humour. I also didn’t like all the over explanations, which seem to assume that the reader knows nothing. To be honest I think the whole novel is glib and condescending in tone. Fortunately it’s a short journey.

I’m sure there are plenty of fans out there who will lap this up, unfortunately I’m not one of them.

[Joe Williams · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this one as an audio book - it's narrated by the author, and he nails the voices and deliveries in a really funny way. I like a lot of the jokes and gags, especially how some things are unnecessarily over-explained in an overly-specific way.

The plot is pretty bare-bones and has a super cliche climax, but that honestly serves the book quite well.

I did enjoy the book on the whole, laughing aloud several times, but unfortunately some of the jokes are bit dodgy, with some misogyny thrown in the mix.

[David R. White · Rating 3 out of 5]

Those who watched Craig's Twitter feed will know that it's his reading of LeCarre that really sells the humor, and on that note, I think the novel suffers a little in comparison. I'd urge anyone who's thinking about picking this up to go with the audiobook and enjoy the whole performance. Nevertheless, a fun read.

[Sam Philpott · Rating 3 out of 5]

Le Carre was the epitome of a 70’s TV cop, self centred and very unpleasant. There were some funny bits in the book and it had plenty of local knowledge, I’d like to know which estate Skibblemead was based on.
By the end of the book I was hoping Le Carrie would get his comeuppance but that did not happen.
Interesting take on a crime novel as usually you side with the detective.

[Jo Orme · Rating 1 out of 5]

Read all of it (as I wanted to find out who the murderer was!) but the book just wasn’t to my taste!!

[Hannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5
Just a spoof of every crime fiction and cop show out there

[Dawn Budd · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so funny I was laughing out loud when reading it. A real parody of police work with a selection of hilarious characters. The book was a joy

[Gareth · Rating 4 out of 5]

***Original 2021 review***
Gloriously silly and brilliantly naff, the adventures of Roger LeCarre - pompous Devon police detective - make for sublime listening. This is detective fiction through the lens of an unbearable dad, exploding with self importance and out of touch half wit that backfires on him. Think Alan Partridge’s failed detective pilot from his autobiography, adapted as a novel. But with a supernatural sense of self-belief that is quintessentially Roger LeCarre.

Fergus Craig is as great a reader as you’d expect from the videos that inspired this, dropping daft non sequiturs throughout. I raced through it in a day and hope there’s more.

***2024 re-read***
Re-read in print after listening to it as an (outstanding) audiobook. This is a very well-crafted and carefully-pitched parody of what a thoroughly dull man from Exeter would consider a great crime novel, and while that is a very specific joke, it’s a constantly rewarding one. Roger LeCarre is a dreadful embarrassment, long live Roger LeCarre.

[Amy Middleton · Rating 1 out of 5]

I went into this having seen the countless praise from well known comedians, expecting a lighthearted, funny, and twisty crime novel - think Richard Osman’s Thursday Murder Club. I could not have been more mislead. Once Upon A Crime is not that.

Respectfully, this is unfortunately up there as one of the worst books I’ve ever read. Painfully unfunny - tries TOO hard to be funny and ultimately, fails. It’s just ridiculous in parts honestly, and almost feels like it’s intentionally trying to be bad. Shock value or something, who knows.

I can totally appreciate a lot of work and effort went into this on Fergus’ part, but it just didn’t hit the mark for me.

Thank you to the publisher for providing me with an ARC via Netgalley, unfortunately this one was just not for me. I’m not sure who it IS for, but certainly not for me.

[Henry Fosdike · Rating 4 out of 5]

As I write this review of my Audible edition of Once Upon a Crime on my Apple MacBook Pro, I am thinking about just how ridiculous Roger Le Carre's first book really is, a fictionalised adaptation of the utterly genuine events that regularly take place amidst Devon and Cornwall on a daily basis. That Fergus Craig has managed to capture the toughness of Exeter's streets is testament to his skills as a novelist (and on the audio edition, a narrator). He brings the cathedral city to life in a way that few ever have before and the results are frequently funny, rivalling the comedy of Josh Widdicombe and then some. Don't go in expecting a serious novel and you should come away satisfied... In the same way that many of Le Carre's conquests also find themselves come the end of the novel.

[Fiona Brichaut · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this a really, really funny book. It's a type of humour that might not work for everyone, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. It's the clever, flat, deadpan humour of BBC quiz shows - think Lee Mack on Would I Lie to You - so if that's your thing, you'll enjoy Once Upon a Crime.

It's a spoof, a parody, a laugh... and it works. From page one right to the end. I found myself giggling through it and boring other people by reading out the funniest bits. What more can you ask for in a funny book?

Apart from the humour, it's also well written, well paced and engaging. Honestly, I can't find a thing wrong to say about it.

Now I'm off to find out what else Fergus Craig has written. He's got a new fan...

[Deec75 · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not my sort of humour at all. I stopped at page 40. The crass description of event when delivering news to the mother of the deceased was appalling. Not only because of all the horrific real life stories of police officers unprofessional conduct and taking advantage of the public they are meant to protect. Also because it was just disgusting. I don’t often use the word hate, but that is the emotion which rose up in me just within 40 pages. I shall return it to the library and thank myself for only borrowing it rather than buying it because it looked like a fun read. Also could not understand the product placement and over describing things. Not a book for me.

[Sheree Morrison · Rating 1 out of 5]

Absolute crap. Le Carre is a Neanderthal & that is besmirching Neanderthals. There is nothing remotely funny about this guy. Oh except when he catches his partner in bed with his wife, one rule for the sexist pig one rule for the wife. Is Kia sponsoring this book? The amount of times he mentions his car in the first 40 pages is ridiculous. Do yourself a favor & burn it, don’t read it.

[Claire Hackeson · Rating 3 out of 5]

My first book of 2022. Silly and tongue in cheek this light hearted novel tells the story of detective Roger Le Carre as he tracks down a murderer on the mean streets of Exeter.

[Kath · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is exactly the book that the Amazon "look inside" feature was made for. It is going to be a controversial book - a marmite book. You're either going to love the humour and sheer tongue in cheek bonkersness of it, or you are going to hate it. Me, I loved it - I know, the star rating gave that away already, but I can also see how others are going to get annoyed, irked, and, well, probably throw it at the wall! Its a spoof by the way, so please don't take it too seriously...
So, Exeter is set to become crowned UK Capital of Culture. An accolade that the Mayor is only too excited to receive. Problem is, there's a dead body to sort out first. A crime that needs sorted in only a couple days, needs done and dusted before the presentation of the award. Enter Det Roger LeCarry, stalwart of the Devon & Cornwall Police force. But he is distracted by important things in his own personal life. Time is running out to change his energy provider... And then there's his fresh-out-of-uni new partner to get to grips with.
Both within the crime and outwith it, this book is bonkers from start to finish. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a bit of a champion for the bonkers genre. The crime is ably (?) investigated and brought to a rather satisfying conclusion and the "other stuff", the shenanigans kept me amused along the way. Oh and some of the character names....
My favourite bit was the mash up of America sports. I nearly wet myself at that point. Read it out to my brother and he keeled over too... But I appreciate that that part is a classic example of how this book will work for some and not others. Unless you are familiar with US sports, it'll just go over your head. But, on the flip side, I'm not a know it all, so there are probably loads of things I missed along the way so I guess you don't have to "get" it all to get along with this book.
On the flip side, I did find the product placement stuff to be probably a little over the line and it did start to annoy me, not quite enough to give up, but nearly.
It's not the longest of reads but it does the job nicely. Yes it's a bit repetitive in places but it's quirky and doesn't take itself too seriously. It is a light read (unless it annoys the heck outta you, of course) and you don't need to have your brain to hand. In fact, it's probably best if you check it at the entrance...
My thanks go to the Publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book.

[Denis Wheller · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a police procedural set in the present but with a chief protagonist (and his colleagues and the criminals) channelling the 1970s (that is fifty years ago, Wilson versus Heath, the three day week, Winter of Discontent, “The Sweeney”). Did you see what I did there? That comedic parenthetical insertion is the sort of thing that takes up huge chunks of this novel. Speaking of insertions, the main difference between our leading man and Jack Regan (of “The Sweeney” v.s.) is that Jack got much less sex.
Detective Inspector Roger LeCarre (who prefers to just be called Detective because it sounds more American) is based in Exeter, as part of the Devon and Cornwall police force. He’s a quiz fanatic, lover of Real Ale, and focussed on crime solving no matter how trivial. Drop a sweet wrapper and he’ll have you in the slammer before the first sugar molecule hits the first taste bud. So focussed on crime and his superhuman capacity for dealing with it is he, that he ignores everything else. For example his wife, is a highly paid professional but he is unaware of any details of her life outside of his bed. Trivia, unless it is pub quiz related, passes him by; for example, he doesn’t know the motto of the city despite it being on his badge and every piece of official paper he sees.
His preferred crime is Murder, of course, and this tale starts with a body being found in the centre of Exeter. The corpus is that of a young drug dealer stabbed with a long bladed weapon. The spot on which he died is covered by two CCTV cameras, both pointed away during the crucial two minutes surrounding the time of death (Forensics are amazingly skilled in this town). Assembling a long list of suspects (basically everyone we have met in the story so far from the Mayor to the Drugs Overlord) he sets off to catch the killer using the basic strategy of charging in and accusing.
The author is a comedian and, as I hope I’ve demonstrated, this story is amusingly written, although the style grates quite quickly. As a crime story it won’t challenge any reader with any experience of the genre.
I would like to thank NetGalley, the publishers and the author for providing me with a draft proof copy for the purpose of this review.

[Lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to the author, publishers Little, Brown and NetGalley UK for access to this as an advance reader’s ebook. This is an honest and voluntary review.

A spoof crime novel with Exeter’s greatest living detective.

Detective Inspector Roger LeCarre is a man on a mission - to rid the streets of Exeter of crime, enjoy a nice calzone with his wife at their favourite Italian eatery, and enjoy being a man.

Yes, he has the misfortune of having lost three partners who were all killed in the line of duty, but that’s just the risk you have to take working for the Devon and Cornwall police force.

In case it isn’t obvious from the description above there is no part of this book that should be taken seriously. This is very much a spoof of a very old-fashioned kind of detective novel. Like The Police Squad in book form. In fact I could see Leslie Nielsen playing the main character of Roger LeCarre very well in his heyday.

It’s well written in the sense that the tone of voice remains consistent throughout. The joke is maintained and isn’t let down by any inconsistent moments. But, for me it just went on too long. The book is only around 270 pages, so I was able to read it within a couple of hours. However, the joke wore thin long before the book was done. For me this kind of humour works best when backed with visuals. A TV version of this would be something I might watch. Punchy little 30 minute episodes with visual gags to break up the relentless narrative voice. In book form it’s just not for me.

[Joshua Moss · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is up there as one of the worst books I have ever read. I get that it tried to be a parody and laugh at itself while trying to be comedic but this was the most horrendously unfunny thing I’ve read. The constant attempt at low quality humour grew tiresome quickly and got in its own way of pacing the story. Pointing out the poor elements of the book within itself doesn’t make it good, it just makes it irritating that the author didn’t bother to improve it. And I don’t even want to talk about the idiotic, yet for some reason constant, product placement.

The protagonist is terribly unlikeable, rude, arrogant, misogynistic. The whole thing has a sexist slant, all of the female characters are there for sex alone - everyone wants sex with the main character - that alongside such low quality dialogue made it read like a poorly written adult film at times. It was always so misplaced and unnecessary. There was clearly significantly more effort put into the male characters but only one had any form of character development and even that felt undeserved.

The whole thing was incredibly predictable. Between the head hopping, poor attempts at fourth wall breaking and ridiculous use of adverbs the only blessing is that it was short. And the only reason I finished it was so it would count towards my reading challenge for the year.

[Amy Seymour · Rating 1 out of 5]

Got to be one of the worst books i've ever read. Comedians are supposed to be funny and talented mate. Not a whole lot of that going on here.
Kinda seems like the author used chatgpt to write this and then didn't edit it. So over descriptive with a lot of product placement.

The main character is hard to like. As is the book. The cover says this is the first book in the series? Should've stopped there. The first 5 pages are a disappointment and then it's just downhill from there. I thought if I stuck it out, things would improve. 20 pages was a real test of strength, again, thought it would get better. It doesn't guys. Gonna use the pages of this as a bog roll mate.
Go home stay home Fergus this sucks.

[Emily Poulson · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book markets itself as a comedic crime novel in the vein of Richard Osman or Ian Moore, aiming for mystery with a touch of wit. However, the humour often feels dated, relying on tired tropes that fail to resonate. Additionally, the heavy-handed product placement, feels intrusive and distracts from the narrative flow.

One particularly uncomfortable scene involves a grieving mother, who offers a plate of custard creams “sexily”. The repeated references to her physical appearance, including her breasts and curves, felt not only inappropriate given the context but also undermined any attempt at subtlety or wit. Rather than laughing, I found myself bracing for the next ill-judged and unfunny sexual remark.

[Emma F · Rating 2 out of 5]

Detective Inspector Roger LeCarre of the Devon and Cornwall police. He’s an old school cop, doesn’t follow the rules, drinks too much, has a wife and questionable view of monogamy and is married to the force. Paired with a new partner, a fresh-out-of-university graduate, he must solve a murder.

This is a bit like if Alan Partridge wrote a crime novel, all “masculine teeth”, “handsome ears” and unnecessary details about cars and technology. Whilst it was fun to begin with the joke did wear thin pretty quickly. It might work well as a short novella or as a sketch but personally I found this format overlong.

[Verity Halliday · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is an intentionally terrible and therefore amusing novel about the seedy crime world of Exeter and the brave, handsome, hard-drinking, sexually irresistible, brown-brogue-wearing, Kia Ceed-driving detective who is dedicated to cleaning up the mean streets,

I imagined the author as an Alan Partridge-esque character who was writing a self-insert novel about a hero cop and over-explaining everything. He’s very concerned with appearing manly and cool, but has a very 20th century approach, especially with technology.

A fun read for people who like “so bad it’s good” books.

Thanks to the author, publisher and NetGalley for providing a review copy in exchange for honest feedback.