Family Gap Year: How We Moved to Brazil, Dropped Our Overscheduled Lives, and Created a Sustainable, Happy Future for our Family

by Sheila Maloney

Tired of living the exhausting life of a modern working mom?

So was Sheila Maloney, a forty-two-year-old lawyer from Chicago with three kids under ten. On paper, everything was great. She had a loving husband, a career, and a home. But Sheila was exhausted by her life’s frenetic pace, running to and from practices, meetings, and other back-to-back appointments. Sheila wondered, “Is this life making me happy or just driving me nuts?” Sheila decided there had to be more, so she packed up with her family of five and embarked on a journey to Vitória, Brazil, where she spent a year reconnecting with herself, family, nature, and the country she was born in.

In Family Gap Year, Sheila will tell you about her adventure and what she learned when she stopped doing what society told her she should do and started listening to what her soul was calling her to do instead. Part memoir, part self-help, part travel guide, and all heart, Family Gap Year will show you how you can

Slow down and escape the exhausting cycle of go-go-go
Reconnect with your family, nature, and authentic self
Revive your marriage
Reveal the splendor of the world to your children
If you want Eat Pray Love but for families, Family Gap Year is the perfect book for you. Escape the daily grind and follow your dreams!

Genres: Nonfiction, Book Club

167 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 8, 2021

About the author

Sheila Maloney was born in São Paulo, Brazil to a Brazilian mother and a U.S. father. Sheila grew up in the US, visiting her extended family in Brazil often. Before enjoying Family Gap Year with her husband and three kids in Espírito Santo, Brazil, Sheila was a lawyer, mediator, Administrative Law Judge and law school professor.

Sheila began her legal career in Big Law before transitioning to Northwestern University, Pritzker School of Law, as the Assistant Director for the Dispute Resolution Center. There, she taught courses in negotiation, mediation, creative problem-solving and legal practice. She received numerous teaching awards. She is the author of, “The American Bar Association’s Guide to Resolving Your Dispute: Inside and Outside of the Courtroom.”

Sheila has presented at various dispute resolution conferences, and has been retained by law firms, corporations and non-profits to train employees on negotiation, conflict management and inclusion practices.

Sheila is a founding Board Member of Legal Prep Charter Academy, Chicago’s only legal-themed charter high school. Sheila also launched Chicago LegalTrek, a pipeline program designed to encourage traditionally underrepresented students to enter, and succeed in law. Sheila has volunteered in her community at Peace Camp, Diversity Collaborative, and on various progressive political campaigns.

Sheila, her husband Sam, and their children, Nina, Alex and Nadia live in Chicago’s Beverly community along with their hamster Teddy and 14 fish. Since returning from Gap Year, Sheila has expanded her professional practice and is now working in mediation, conflict resolution, relationship coaching, and matchmaking.

Reviews

[Chanda Foucher · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a person who did a "Grown Up Gap Year" in my late 30's, this book struck many familiar chords. I love the author's transparency in sharing the ins and outs of her family gap year, garnished with subtle humor throughout. If you're curious about how a gap year can go from a nagging idea to reality, this is a great read. Also a great read for anyone planning a trip to Brazil or anyone who likes a heartwarming page turner and good vibes. Perfect 1st book of 2022 for me :)

[Thereadingbell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Family Gap Year by Sheila Maloney

This book is more than taking a trip to Brazil with her husband and three kids. Sheila had a dream of recapturing her life and in this she tells us the readers how she did it and what she got out of it. Her main message was to dream and do not let go of it find a way to make it come true. I like her descriptions of the places she visited in Brazil especially her experience at the Amazon Rainforest.

This was a quick read and an in depth read of Sheila personal growth in herself and the ones she loves while she took a leap of faith and went exploring her dreams in Brazil.

I also like that she discussed in detail the pressure of professional women with family responsibilities on top of it. Her burnout from everything and realizing what she needed to recover from her over exhausted life.

[Linda Hawkswell · Rating 5 out of 5]

An enthralling read
What a wonderfully brave and inspiring way to spend a year. Sheila is exhausted by the pace and monotony of her family life. Thinking there must be more to the daily drudge she packed her family off for a Gap Year in Brazil, a brave and wondrous thing to do.
We learn more about the author's Brazilian roots and her reconnection with family and her true self. They all soon adapted to the slower pace of life and the children loved the fact that school was only half a day, leaving them time to enjoy themselves with days out. Life took on new meanings.
The joy of cooking family meals and all sitting down at the same time were some of the small pleasures of everyday life. The joy of the family's journey of re-discovery shines through in the author's words, we see them re-connecting with essential needs and reassessing their values.
Thank you, Sheila, for sharing your wonderful year of re-discovery. I can highly recommend this book.

[Ruben Garcia · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read and a fascinating journey of discovery and adventure.

A wonderful read. It made me cry, laugh, dream, think and start planning our family's next adventure. I love it and highly recommend it to anyone stuck and looking for inspiration to free themselves and embark on a journey of adventure and self-discovery. Thanks Sheila.

[Allison · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like the idea and I like the author. The book was short and sweet. But it ended up reading more like a personal diary than anything else. I also was a little frustrated by the overall tone of how great Brazil is and how many things America gets wrong (which is funny because I actually feel that way in real life - I just think the simplicity of the continued message to that end in the book felt worn).

It is great to see how a woman, and a mom, managed to do this and live her dream. But, of course, it is harder to see a path forward for the average person when she is from the country and wildly supported by family there. I believe it is a very different experience for families going stone-cold into a different culture where they don't know anyone.

I also wasn't sure she hit on the "how we created a sustainable, happy future" promise at the end. I was left still feeling like they hadn't found a way to bring the best of Brazil life back to the rush/capitalist culture of America. And that is what I am constantly looking for advice on as a busy mom myself.

Again, an easy read and I genuinely am happy for the author. I appreciated her heart and passion and her desire to inspire others. There were just some things that felt like misses.

[Sohyoon · Rating 5 out of 5]

The strength of this book is that it's such an open and authentic sharing of a portion of a person's life journey - like getting an intimate peek into someone's journal and their insides but with more humor and minus the rambling one may expect in a diary. Because it's so personal and real, I couldn't help but connect with this gem of a book - I laughed and I even cried as I devoured it.

The book focuses in on the gap year in Brazil taken by Sheila and her family away from the hustle and bustle of their lives in Chicago. What makes it so much more than something like a travel guide for me is the weaving of the backdrop of the author's life in the U.S. and her personal history including the story of her parents. Such things of course inform how she experiences and evaluates life in the U.S. vs. Brazil as well as internally. Through the experiences documented in the book, I saw the author gain a different perspective and deeper appreciation of her and her family's history as well a richer inner life. And as a fellow human on my own path, I found the experience enriching for me and just beautiful.

[Kenny Cronin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think I heard about this book from a podcast and got it because I’ve been having saudade do Brasil. I loved that the author was from Chicago and had such strong ties to Brazil. I didn’t expect her to be so funny and cracked up at her stories of culture shock, anecdotes about her mom, frogs in showers, swearing in Maracanã and “sexy Huck Finn.” I felt a lot of her sentiments about the US and Brazil and she was very vulnerable at times which I appreciated. I loved finding someone who was raised Catholic clearly explain their spirituality by acknowledging divinity in the beauty and good in our world. I’ve never heard someone put it so eloquently. I love that she discussed the parallels between Trump and Bolsonaro and the disillusion of both populations that elected them. I learned a lot about the Amazon from her trip. She’s a really good writer altogether and tied in Portuguese so nicely. The entire time I was thinking about this beautiful year they had together just knowing that the pandemic would be at their doorstep upon their return but how the gap year prepared them. What a cool set of parents to have this experience!

[Alyson Sheldrake · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book to challenge and inspire you

This was a philosophical and fascinating account of a family that gave up everything in the US for a year and moved to live in Brazil. As well as writing about things that happened to them during the year, the author really dug down into what it meant to her, her marriage, and her children to move abroad. The challenges, fears and internal thoughts are all brought to life with vivid honesty, and I was captivated by their story.

This is a story about unhooking yourself from the daily grind and reconnecting with your true self and reassessing which priorities in life are truly important to you. Add to that a good dose of Brazilian life and culture and you have a great book that might even challenge you to look at your own life. Highly recommended.

[Katrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely devoured this book - probably took me two nights, but that's pretty good for a middle-aged mom! I loved the author's casual style - I felt like we were just sitting around drinking coffee or wine and she was regaling me with all her stories. I also loved the way she framed how family life is different and similar in both the US and Brazil. A lot of the book is dedicated to exploring how much of what we think of as "normal" family life is flexible - we get to choose how busy we are as a family, and more importantly, how we will center our values and goals in all that busy-ness. It really got me thinking. Thank you, thank you for writing this book!

[Griselda Garibay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed Family Gap Year. It is a candid, personal and inspiring account. I connected with the author from the beginning. I felt I was in the adventure right alongside her and her family. The book is a validation of what many of us have been feeling for years and were perhaps hesitant to voice out loud. I particularly appreciated the lack of judgment of anyone's lifestyle. The author instead encouraged the reader to revisit what we thought was impossible and out of reach. I so recommend this book. I look forward to her next endeavor.

[Jennifer M. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Family Gap Year is insightful, funny, informative and thought provoking. It is an in depth exploration of how to live an intentional life — following your heart and your values. As a mother of 3 who has dutifully followed the expected path set before me —education, marriage, job, kids, house, dog — reading Family Gap Year challenged my beliefs that my past decisions have determined my present and future. FGY opened my mind to the possibility of making different decisions for me and for my family.

[Mirjam · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautifully written account of a relatable mom, right in the thick of the frenetic hustle of all that encompasses U.S. middle class, middle aged working parenthood, who decided to just... pause.
It's an account of that pause, and how it changed the way Sheila related to herself, her family, and the world.
This book asks us all to consider the price we pay for failing to live thoughtfully, and what other paths might be available.

[Diana Silva · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book because it was honest about what the author experienced moving to my home country, Brazil. I loved the funny stories and how she told about her family with so much love and good description. I also liked that she told the truth about the good and bad parts of Brazil and the USA - so maybe more people can be educated about what great things Brazil has to offer and the difficulties of life there. My Brazilian friends would love to read this in Portuguese.

[Larry C · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book is a unique and heartfelt story about leaving your comfort zone, and different in that it is an international family gap year (back to her home country of Brazil). She obviously knows Portuguese and cultural differences, but not her American husband and children, which makes for an intriguing lifetime family adventure, plus entertaining and humorous situations. Inspiring book for parents and travelers.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautiful book about one family's gap year experience in Brazil. I appreciate the author's willingness to be vulnerable and honest about both the reasons for taking the trip and all the lessons learned through the experience. I read this book in one sitting -- it was powerful and inspired me to think about how to incorporate more adventure and family time in my own life.

[Oloughlinkt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sheila Maloney is a down-to-earth author and this novel is positively relatable to any of us who have attempted to juggle their career, raising children, caring for aging parents, and/or just living modern life. The book is a thoughtful, humorous take on how to escape the daily rat race.

[Nina Finkelstein · Rating 5 out of 5]

Family Gap Year was a phenomenal read. Sheila is extremely honest about every aspect of her journey as a Brazilian-American mom, and invites us to watch as she reconnects with her culture and identity. Loved this book, great job Sheila!

[Melinda Stringer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it! What an amazing adventure. Such an enjoyable read while being thought provoking...thinking of ways to incorporate "gap" time in my life.

[Louren Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a beautiful, inspiring story. I strongly recommend you read it. I loved it.

[Dana Mitra · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book as I was preparing for a month solo stay in Vitória for business. I Was hoping it would be more of a travelogue with details of their experiences in Brazil, but it was more of a memory book of how she felt about taking a rest with her family. It chronicled all of the happy parts. I would have liked to have seen the tough days as much as the happy.

[Pat · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had high hopes for this book, and I was even more impressed than I expected. Wow! It is such an easy read - and yet there is so much to consider, reflect on, digest and act on. The author moves deftly from sharing her very personal feelings and experiences (even when they are challenging). She also moves easily from the personal to the cultural, political, economic - from the micro to the macro - and back again. Like another reader said, I felt like I devoured this book, only stopping when I wanted to reflect on, and consider, what I'd read between chapters or imagine them in my mind's eye. I had a theatre instructor once who talked about "holographing" a play. I felt like I could almost see the beaches, the markets, the school as I read! I read this months ago and still I think of it often. What a thoughtful, enjoyable and inspiring book.

[Melanie Howe · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a great read! I love that this book is part memoir, part relationship advice, part travel guide to Brazil, part life skills coach. It’s well written and well balanced and the story is captivating and entertaining. The subject hit this working American mama right in the gut. Ms. Maloney made the fanciful seem possible and adjustable to fit any one of our lives and return favorable results. We don’t all have to chuck it and go to another continent for a whole year, but we can all make adjustments to reclaim our sense of self, sense of purpose, and our connection with our loved ones. I loved it and will continue to refer to this book when I need a nudge back to center for myself or my family.