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What We Wish Were True: Reflections on Nurturing Life and Facing Death
Profound essays on nurturing life while facing a terminal diagnosis, from the dedicated humanitarian and young mother whose writings The New York Times called "nothing less than a master class in how to be fully human"
“I am holding both my hope and my grief together in the same hands. It is a loose hold, looser than I am accustomed to. My love is so much bigger than me.”
Nonprofit leader and minister Tallu Schuyler Quinn has spent her adult life working to alleviate hunger, systemic inequality, and food waste, first as a volunteer throughout the United States and abroad, and then as the founder of the Nashville Food Project, where she supported the vibrant community work of local food justice in Middle Tennessee. That all changed just after her fortieth birthday, when she was diagnosed with stage IV glioblastoma, an aggressive form of terminal brain cancer.
In What We Wish Were True, Quinn achingly grapples with the possibility of leaving behind the husband and children she adores, and what it means to live with a terminal diagnosis and still find meaning. “I think about how my purpose may be the same in death as it continues to be in life—surrendering to the hope that our weaknesses can be made strong, that what is broken can be made whole,” she writes.
Through gorgeous prose, Quinn masterfully weaves together the themes of life and death by integrating spiritually nourishing stories about family, identity, vocational call, beloved community, God’s wide welcome, and living with brain cancer. Taken together, these stunning essays are a piercing reminder to cherish each moment, whether heartbreaking or hilarious, and cast loose other concerns.
As a mother, a kindred spirit, and a dear friend, Tallu Schuyler Quinn looks into our eyes with well-earned tears in her own and tells us the bittersweet truth: We are all searching for what has already found us—present and boundless love. This love will deliver us and never let us go.
“I am holding both my hope and my grief together in the same hands. It is a loose hold, looser than I am accustomed to. My love is so much bigger than me.”
Nonprofit leader and minister Tallu Schuyler Quinn has spent her adult life working to alleviate hunger, systemic inequality, and food waste, first as a volunteer throughout the United States and abroad, and then as the founder of the Nashville Food Project, where she supported the vibrant community work of local food justice in Middle Tennessee. That all changed just after her fortieth birthday, when she was diagnosed with stage IV glioblastoma, an aggressive form of terminal brain cancer.
In What We Wish Were True, Quinn achingly grapples with the possibility of leaving behind the husband and children she adores, and what it means to live with a terminal diagnosis and still find meaning. “I think about how my purpose may be the same in death as it continues to be in life—surrendering to the hope that our weaknesses can be made strong, that what is broken can be made whole,” she writes.
Through gorgeous prose, Quinn masterfully weaves together the themes of life and death by integrating spiritually nourishing stories about family, identity, vocational call, beloved community, God’s wide welcome, and living with brain cancer. Taken together, these stunning essays are a piercing reminder to cherish each moment, whether heartbreaking or hilarious, and cast loose other concerns.
As a mother, a kindred spirit, and a dear friend, Tallu Schuyler Quinn looks into our eyes with well-earned tears in her own and tells us the bittersweet truth: We are all searching for what has already found us—present and boundless love. This love will deliver us and never let us go.
208 pages, Hardcover
Published April 19, 2022
33 people are currently reading
3726 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 126 reviews
September 11, 2022
I’ve always loved cancer stories but when I started this I wasn’t sure I was going to read it. This author was really religious. I realize that many people are and I have enjoyed quite a few books by people who are religious and who include that in their books but here the author frequently mentions God and cites biblical passages. Too often for me. She had been a seminary student and God/religion was integral to her life. Also, what bothered me more, is the opposite of vegan attitude. Her mentions of how animals “give” their bodies, their eggs, etc. bothered me. She shares many examples of her cooking and of the food project(s) she worked on using animals for food. I know that 99% of people do have her attitudes about farmed animals but reading it was disturbing. Those two beliefs she had kept me from identifying with her. My feelings about death will never mirror hers because our opinions differ about what death is.
She’s a good writer though (because of her brain cancer and its affects, especially how it impaired her vision, she did have help with most of the writing) and she’s an excellent storyteller. These are beautifully written essays. When I could dissociate enough to try to ignore the religion/farmed animals passages I appreciated her narrative. I was particularly interested in what she noticed about the physical effects she experienced from her brain cancer.
This book is the best kind of gift she could have left to her children and to others who loved her and cared about her. If we could have had conversations sans religion and animal based foods I would have enjoyed her company but I doubt she would have had interest in that. She was a mensch. She was a good person and tried to do a lot of good in her life. I like that though she was Christian she was interested in various denominations and other religions. She was a feminist and non-judgmental and her life’s work was in various areas of social and food justice. She was psychologically minded and I particularly admired how she made sure her children got support and therapy throughout her illness and how she made plans in advance to do what she could to ease their grief after her death even as she was aware she wouldn’t know what would work. Her honesty about everything was wonderful.
There were some laugh out moments for me when reading this. I appreciated the included humor.
Despite not being sure I could get through this and not enjoying the constant religious references this was a page-turner for me. She writes about her illness and impending death. She also writes about the covid-19 pandemic which happened at the same time. She writes about all sorts of things including her growing up years, her various travels and careers. She writes about other people including her husband, her children, her parents, her brothers, her friends, people she’s known through work and others. I found it riveting and a very fast read. Just as she (naturally) wanted more time I wish there were even more essays in this book. I couldn’t get enough.
She includes some passages by other writers. Most of them are poems.
There were titled artworks in the book that seemed to me might be of her brain/illness and as I was reading I wondered if they were her art. (She was an artist and one of her majors was in papermaking and book design.) At the end there is a note I am glad was included. She reveals that the artworks were done by her and her kids together and she chose them because of all the art they made these eight “best captured how visually and cognitively confusing my experience is right now.” She died after a year and a half of illness with glioblastoma.
Highly recommended for anyone wanting to contemplate their mortality or someone else’s mortality, those who enjoy short autobiographical essays and people interested in social justice issues. It will likely increase their enjoyment if God/religion is a part of readers’ lives. I can recommend this to most readers though. I figure that if I could enjoy this almost anyone can and many will appreciate it even more than I did. The religion/Good and animal based food mentions are probably the only reasons I didn’t give this book 5 stars. It’s a superb book.
“Our relationship with time is so curious to me now—how we assume we will have it, how we squander it, how we unknowingly numb ourselves to the gift of it."
She’s a good writer though (because of her brain cancer and its affects, especially how it impaired her vision, she did have help with most of the writing) and she’s an excellent storyteller. These are beautifully written essays. When I could dissociate enough to try to ignore the religion/farmed animals passages I appreciated her narrative. I was particularly interested in what she noticed about the physical effects she experienced from her brain cancer.
This book is the best kind of gift she could have left to her children and to others who loved her and cared about her. If we could have had conversations sans religion and animal based foods I would have enjoyed her company but I doubt she would have had interest in that. She was a mensch. She was a good person and tried to do a lot of good in her life. I like that though she was Christian she was interested in various denominations and other religions. She was a feminist and non-judgmental and her life’s work was in various areas of social and food justice. She was psychologically minded and I particularly admired how she made sure her children got support and therapy throughout her illness and how she made plans in advance to do what she could to ease their grief after her death even as she was aware she wouldn’t know what would work. Her honesty about everything was wonderful.
There were some laugh out moments for me when reading this. I appreciated the included humor.
Despite not being sure I could get through this and not enjoying the constant religious references this was a page-turner for me. She writes about her illness and impending death. She also writes about the covid-19 pandemic which happened at the same time. She writes about all sorts of things including her growing up years, her various travels and careers. She writes about other people including her husband, her children, her parents, her brothers, her friends, people she’s known through work and others. I found it riveting and a very fast read. Just as she (naturally) wanted more time I wish there were even more essays in this book. I couldn’t get enough.
She includes some passages by other writers. Most of them are poems.
There were titled artworks in the book that seemed to me might be of her brain/illness and as I was reading I wondered if they were her art. (She was an artist and one of her majors was in papermaking and book design.) At the end there is a note I am glad was included. She reveals that the artworks were done by her and her kids together and she chose them because of all the art they made these eight “best captured how visually and cognitively confusing my experience is right now.” She died after a year and a half of illness with glioblastoma.
Highly recommended for anyone wanting to contemplate their mortality or someone else’s mortality, those who enjoy short autobiographical essays and people interested in social justice issues. It will likely increase their enjoyment if God/religion is a part of readers’ lives. I can recommend this to most readers though. I figure that if I could enjoy this almost anyone can and many will appreciate it even more than I did. The religion/Good and animal based food mentions are probably the only reasons I didn’t give this book 5 stars. It’s a superb book.
“Our relationship with time is so curious to me now—how we assume we will have it, how we squander it, how we unknowingly numb ourselves to the gift of it."
June 18, 2022
Audiobook….read by Allyson Ryan, Tallu Schuyler Quinn
….5 hours and 4 minutes
Ann Patchett said it best….
“Profound essays on nurturing life while facing a terminal diagnosis, from the dedicated humanitarian and young mother creating ‘a vibrant legacy for us to hold on to and learn from”.
Tulla Schuyler Quinn was the founder of the Nashville Food project, an organization that seeks to bring people together to grow, cook, and share nourishing food, cultivate community, and alleviate hunger.
In July 2020, Tulla was diagnosed with glioblastoma, an aggressive brain cancer.
This book is beautifully well written and a wonderful gift to leave behind. She wrote this during the eighteen months after being diagnosed with her terminal disease.
She died in February, 2022 at the age of forty-two.
She was the kind of woman you wish you had known.
….5 hours and 4 minutes
Ann Patchett said it best….
“Profound essays on nurturing life while facing a terminal diagnosis, from the dedicated humanitarian and young mother creating ‘a vibrant legacy for us to hold on to and learn from”.
Tulla Schuyler Quinn was the founder of the Nashville Food project, an organization that seeks to bring people together to grow, cook, and share nourishing food, cultivate community, and alleviate hunger.
In July 2020, Tulla was diagnosed with glioblastoma, an aggressive brain cancer.
This book is beautifully well written and a wonderful gift to leave behind. She wrote this during the eighteen months after being diagnosed with her terminal disease.
She died in February, 2022 at the age of forty-two.
She was the kind of woman you wish you had known.
June 16, 2022
When I first started using goodreads to track and review books during the pandemic, my daughter Reilly (a voracious reader) told me she only gave a book five stars if she felt it was truly transformational — life changing, perspective changing. If I were using this barometer for What We Wish Were True — I would give it 10 stars, or more. Infinite stars.
I read this book deliberately and slowly. I took breaks of contemplation and I intentionally read this collection of reflections very methodically. I read and reread chapters and then sat on it for days. I could have easily read this book in one sitting. I didn’t want to. I wanted it to last and I wanted it to soak into my soul.
I can’t say I knew Tallu personally — we weren’t friends, but I had come in contact with her as we both did our work in the non-profit sector for the last couple decades. I remember when the Nashville Food Project started. I followed her growth and success and then I followed her final journey. I wish I had known her. I feel I missed out on knowing such a pure and beautiful soul.
I really loved this excerpt: “In my mind’s eye, the path ends at a sturdy stone table in the wilderness, and what happens there is real and forever. There is no pain there, no hate, no walls, no shame. The people gather and bring their best because that is all they carry there, and all they have, and it is offered freely, wholly, and is real.”
This book has a good mix of laughter and contemplation over the reality of impending death. I think the only time I had an outright bawl session was when I started reading it the night of her publication release celebration. Her husband spoke and her kids were there and local authors read excerpts and I came home and dove right in — and that was emotional. As you may know…she missed the release of her book only by about 2 months. That’s so tough…they thought she’d make it. I can’t imagine the thought of simply being able to think about my eternal demise as it happens. Such a good read. She was a beautiful writer.
This is a book I will gladly lend, but I will never let it go. Her sweet son stamped her signature inside the cover and her daughter signed her “T.” This is a treasure, a gift, and will forever be in my daily days of ‘normal days.’ Thank you, Tallu.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I read this book deliberately and slowly. I took breaks of contemplation and I intentionally read this collection of reflections very methodically. I read and reread chapters and then sat on it for days. I could have easily read this book in one sitting. I didn’t want to. I wanted it to last and I wanted it to soak into my soul.
I can’t say I knew Tallu personally — we weren’t friends, but I had come in contact with her as we both did our work in the non-profit sector for the last couple decades. I remember when the Nashville Food Project started. I followed her growth and success and then I followed her final journey. I wish I had known her. I feel I missed out on knowing such a pure and beautiful soul.
I really loved this excerpt: “In my mind’s eye, the path ends at a sturdy stone table in the wilderness, and what happens there is real and forever. There is no pain there, no hate, no walls, no shame. The people gather and bring their best because that is all they carry there, and all they have, and it is offered freely, wholly, and is real.”
This book has a good mix of laughter and contemplation over the reality of impending death. I think the only time I had an outright bawl session was when I started reading it the night of her publication release celebration. Her husband spoke and her kids were there and local authors read excerpts and I came home and dove right in — and that was emotional. As you may know…she missed the release of her book only by about 2 months. That’s so tough…they thought she’d make it. I can’t imagine the thought of simply being able to think about my eternal demise as it happens. Such a good read. She was a beautiful writer.
This is a book I will gladly lend, but I will never let it go. Her sweet son stamped her signature inside the cover and her daughter signed her “T.” This is a treasure, a gift, and will forever be in my daily days of ‘normal days.’ Thank you, Tallu.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
March 25, 2022
I I don’t even truly know where to start a review for a book like this . How can you review something so honest , so brutal, so powerful.
I’ll try but I don’t think I’ll be able to do it justice.
If I had to sum this book up in one word that would be mesmerising . This book cast a spell over me and I found it impossible to put down, in fact the only time I felt truly able to put it down was when I had to reflect on the words I had just read.
. Sometimes do you ever feel like an author is talking just to you? That’s how I felt. It felt as though I was reading something directly purely at me, so personal that it was impossible to look away.
It felt completely relatable even though the main subject of the book (a woman trying to find her way through her cancer journey) is luckily not personally relatable to most of us.
This book is brutally honest. You know you are reading something special.
It is a profound collection of essays that flow seamlessly together like a poetic memoir.
I must confess when I opened the book and saw how devout in faith the author was I was worried that i would not fully relate to the author but her strong faith only made me happy that she is content and gave me hope that her faith will ease her fears and continue to give her strength.
I don’t know how she is currently but I hope she is still experiencing many more happy moments with her family.
There were so many quotes that I jotted down to remind myself of in my day to day life but if I quote them all I feel this will be the longest review ever written. I will simply say I believe that there is something that everyone can take away from this book and I’ll be recommending it to everyone I know.
Thank you to the author for such an honest and beautiful book and thank you to the publishers for giving me the privilege of reading this.
I’ll try but I don’t think I’ll be able to do it justice.
If I had to sum this book up in one word that would be mesmerising . This book cast a spell over me and I found it impossible to put down, in fact the only time I felt truly able to put it down was when I had to reflect on the words I had just read.
. Sometimes do you ever feel like an author is talking just to you? That’s how I felt. It felt as though I was reading something directly purely at me, so personal that it was impossible to look away.
It felt completely relatable even though the main subject of the book (a woman trying to find her way through her cancer journey) is luckily not personally relatable to most of us.
This book is brutally honest. You know you are reading something special.
It is a profound collection of essays that flow seamlessly together like a poetic memoir.
I must confess when I opened the book and saw how devout in faith the author was I was worried that i would not fully relate to the author but her strong faith only made me happy that she is content and gave me hope that her faith will ease her fears and continue to give her strength.
I don’t know how she is currently but I hope she is still experiencing many more happy moments with her family.
There were so many quotes that I jotted down to remind myself of in my day to day life but if I quote them all I feel this will be the longest review ever written. I will simply say I believe that there is something that everyone can take away from this book and I’ll be recommending it to everyone I know.
Thank you to the author for such an honest and beautiful book and thank you to the publishers for giving me the privilege of reading this.
June 26, 2022
This is a book that I really wish I loved. It was written by a woman who lived a beautiful, fulfilling life and had to leave it too soon due to an aggressive brain cancer. (42… younger than me, geez…) It was a collection of essays, some about her past, some about her current struggles with her illness. The current ones about her illness were very interesting to me, since I got this book to read about what goes through a person’s mind when they get a terminal diagnosis at a young age. The essays about earlier times were not quite so interesting. They were nice and well-written, but, for me, not much more than that. I’m glad she was able to leave something like this for her children before she died; they will appreciate it when they’re older.
March 28, 2022
For those familiar with "What We Wish Were True" author Tallu Quinn's life-changing work as founder and longtime director of The Nashville Food Project, the April release of the book has an extra layer of emotional resonance perhaps not initially felt by those who will simply pick up the book themselves unaware of her life and the fact that Quinn's journey with Stage IV Glioblastoma (brain cancer) ended only a few weeks before the book's publication.
That said, "What We Wish Were True" may very well not be the book that you expect it to be. While it is at times evident that Quinn is likely in her final days with this journey, the remarkable truth is that "What We Wish Were True" is as much about life as it is death. In fact, with the exception of a handful of reflections where Quinn quite explicitly talks about her likely impending death it wouldn't be unreasonable to call "What We Wish Were True" as much an autobiographical tale as it is her reflections on nurturing this unpredictable life and treating the facing of death with the same love and respect that one treats every other unexpected fork in the road.
Having only 2-3 months ago lost a dear friend to Glioblastoma and also watching from across the street as a dear and sweet neighbor spends her final days with the same diagnosis in the home where she raised her entire family, I am instead caused by "What We Wish Were True" to reflect upon my own unexpected life journey with spina bifida and a myriad of associated diagnoses that doctors expected would take my life at a mere three-days-old but instead has found me living into my 50's with a far higher quality of life than anyone ever expected.
As I watched my own brother pass away due to pancreatic cancer in the past year at the young age of 43, I can reflect upon my own times when I've tried bargaining with God and tried to grasp why I've been blessed with more time than expected while others with many more reasons to live have seen their journeys shortened. It's hard to grasp, I suppose, why such a vibrant and loving life as Quinn's is impacted by a diagnosis that is more common among older folks but instead occurs in the life of a woman impacting so many lives while also living in a happy marriage and with children far too young to lose their mother.
Quinn, at times, grapples with both big and small questions in "What We Wish Were True." However, at times, it is simply powerful in the simplicity with which she reflects upon her own life and a future that will likely exist without her and the painful wonderings if the children that she nurtured into this world will in a few years remember her physical presence and physicality.
At times, "What We Wish Were True" feels disconnected as Quinn reflects on her life and the points of reference that play out in her mind over and over and over again. At times, "What We Wish Were True" feels like deep reflections playing out against the backdrop of one of life's most challenging journeys. At other times, there's almost a randomness to the book as memories become triggers for deeper soul-searching and introspection. "What We Wish Were True" is not necessarily a sentimental journey - instead, it is a rather resolute and matter-of-fact one. It often finds Quinn coming to some degree of acceptance amidst fear of the future she knows lies ahead and the complete lack of knowing what it will mean for the people and the places around her.
It is likely best to experience "What We Wish Were True" without expectations, no small task given its larger than life subject matter and the ways that we've all had our own personal experiences with death even if, in all likelihood, they haven't resembled those of Quinn.
Instead, however, "What We Wish Were True" is likely best experienced as one woman's final gift to the world around her - the husband she adores, the children she can't fathom growing up without her, the people of Middle Tennessee whom she loves deeply, and the God she continues to believe in passionately even amidst this final unexpected journey.
"What We Wish Were True" is not the book I entirely expected it to be, yet it feels at its core like the book Quinn intended it to be. It is a simple yet powerful tribute to a life well-loved, people well-loved, and the painful truth that while death will will undeniably alter these truths it cannot possibly erase them.
That said, "What We Wish Were True" may very well not be the book that you expect it to be. While it is at times evident that Quinn is likely in her final days with this journey, the remarkable truth is that "What We Wish Were True" is as much about life as it is death. In fact, with the exception of a handful of reflections where Quinn quite explicitly talks about her likely impending death it wouldn't be unreasonable to call "What We Wish Were True" as much an autobiographical tale as it is her reflections on nurturing this unpredictable life and treating the facing of death with the same love and respect that one treats every other unexpected fork in the road.
Having only 2-3 months ago lost a dear friend to Glioblastoma and also watching from across the street as a dear and sweet neighbor spends her final days with the same diagnosis in the home where she raised her entire family, I am instead caused by "What We Wish Were True" to reflect upon my own unexpected life journey with spina bifida and a myriad of associated diagnoses that doctors expected would take my life at a mere three-days-old but instead has found me living into my 50's with a far higher quality of life than anyone ever expected.
As I watched my own brother pass away due to pancreatic cancer in the past year at the young age of 43, I can reflect upon my own times when I've tried bargaining with God and tried to grasp why I've been blessed with more time than expected while others with many more reasons to live have seen their journeys shortened. It's hard to grasp, I suppose, why such a vibrant and loving life as Quinn's is impacted by a diagnosis that is more common among older folks but instead occurs in the life of a woman impacting so many lives while also living in a happy marriage and with children far too young to lose their mother.
Quinn, at times, grapples with both big and small questions in "What We Wish Were True." However, at times, it is simply powerful in the simplicity with which she reflects upon her own life and a future that will likely exist without her and the painful wonderings if the children that she nurtured into this world will in a few years remember her physical presence and physicality.
At times, "What We Wish Were True" feels disconnected as Quinn reflects on her life and the points of reference that play out in her mind over and over and over again. At times, "What We Wish Were True" feels like deep reflections playing out against the backdrop of one of life's most challenging journeys. At other times, there's almost a randomness to the book as memories become triggers for deeper soul-searching and introspection. "What We Wish Were True" is not necessarily a sentimental journey - instead, it is a rather resolute and matter-of-fact one. It often finds Quinn coming to some degree of acceptance amidst fear of the future she knows lies ahead and the complete lack of knowing what it will mean for the people and the places around her.
It is likely best to experience "What We Wish Were True" without expectations, no small task given its larger than life subject matter and the ways that we've all had our own personal experiences with death even if, in all likelihood, they haven't resembled those of Quinn.
Instead, however, "What We Wish Were True" is likely best experienced as one woman's final gift to the world around her - the husband she adores, the children she can't fathom growing up without her, the people of Middle Tennessee whom she loves deeply, and the God she continues to believe in passionately even amidst this final unexpected journey.
"What We Wish Were True" is not the book I entirely expected it to be, yet it feels at its core like the book Quinn intended it to be. It is a simple yet powerful tribute to a life well-loved, people well-loved, and the painful truth that while death will will undeniably alter these truths it cannot possibly erase them.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 19, 2022
In “Be My Guest: Reflections on Food, Community, and the Meaning of Generosity” Priya Basil writes, “Stories enact a form of mutual hospitality. What is a story if not an enticement to stay? You’re invited in, but right away you must reciprocate and host the story back, through concentration: whether you read or hear a narrative- from a book or a person- you need to listen to really understand. Granting complete attention is like giving a silent ovation. Story and listener open, unfold into and harbour each other.”
Hospitality in writing and reading. This is what it was like for me reading the words, the stories, shared by Tallu. Her life the ultimate definition of hospitality. We were guests and hosts to each other as I took in each word with complete attention. Hearing her voice, feeling her joys, sorrows, hopes. I felt called to her table. Brought into her life like a close friend. Like we were sharing in these stories together over that simple meal of a good crusty loaf of bread, some sweet butter, and maybe some salty cured meats. This book holds beauty in its utter fragility. Holds strength in its vulnerability. Holds legacy in its own inevitable ending. I couldn’t put the book down.
I hope no matter the differences other readers have to Tallu Schuyler Quinn’s own journey or faith life they will, too, feel just as invited to the table to share in all these things. And perhaps be inspired to open their own door to others to share as well.
Full disclosure, I am one of the fortunate ones to have had the absolute privilege to call Tallu friend and coworker. I hear her laughter in these pages. I feel her sincere hugs with these words. I’m grateful for this gift. I miss her.
Hospitality in writing and reading. This is what it was like for me reading the words, the stories, shared by Tallu. Her life the ultimate definition of hospitality. We were guests and hosts to each other as I took in each word with complete attention. Hearing her voice, feeling her joys, sorrows, hopes. I felt called to her table. Brought into her life like a close friend. Like we were sharing in these stories together over that simple meal of a good crusty loaf of bread, some sweet butter, and maybe some salty cured meats. This book holds beauty in its utter fragility. Holds strength in its vulnerability. Holds legacy in its own inevitable ending. I couldn’t put the book down.
I hope no matter the differences other readers have to Tallu Schuyler Quinn’s own journey or faith life they will, too, feel just as invited to the table to share in all these things. And perhaps be inspired to open their own door to others to share as well.
Full disclosure, I am one of the fortunate ones to have had the absolute privilege to call Tallu friend and coworker. I hear her laughter in these pages. I feel her sincere hugs with these words. I’m grateful for this gift. I miss her.
April 20, 2022
I was looking forward to reading this collection of essays, but instead, found myself dozing off after slogging through about six chapters. There were some lines that made me pause to reflect about my own eventual death, but mainly, this was dull and repetitive, with the author bringing up living in Nicaragua or that she was the CEO for a food bank project over and over again - probably because the chapters were originally blog posts, and this wasn't written as a cohesive book. I also was not into the religious tone and if I had known in advance it was written in that vein, I wouldn't have picked this up in the first place. The book didn't hold my interest and just wasn't for me.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the eARC.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the eARC.
August 4, 2023
I stepped away from this book over halfway through because, though beautiful, it has moments where it feels extremely heavy. I picked it back up and finally finished it this last week and I feel like I want to go back through and highlight so many things. Tallu seems like she was a wonderful person and she had a lot of love in her life - but I can only imagine the strength and wisdom it must take to face something like a terminal diagnosis and use it as an opportunity to take stock of all you have and all you want to do with the time you have left. It's a beautiful lesson on what really matters and how time stops for no one. I am so glad I read this book and grateful for the things it reminded me about.
April 25, 2022
I am so honored to know Tallu and her family. Her legacy is one of beautiful words, full bellies, and all-encompassing laughter. So proud of this book and collection of life-altering essays. Amen.
August 7, 2022
Many dog-eared pages to return to - for reflection, to cry, for comfort. I love me some Quinns, and it’s a privilege to get to read the words of someone they all love so much! ❤️🩹💔❤️
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May 6, 2022I’m leaving a rating off of this one as it’s a memoir/personal story and just because it didn’t resonate with me, if doesn’t deserve a lower rating.
Unfortunately this story was not what I was expecting. It focused on the authors nonprofit and ministry (which is no doubt amazing) but what I craved was more her cancer journey. My own mother passed away the same cancer and only lived three months. It was hard to find meaning when so much of the story focused on her ministry. It was a tad repetitive as well.
Unfortunately this story was not what I was expecting. It focused on the authors nonprofit and ministry (which is no doubt amazing) but what I craved was more her cancer journey. My own mother passed away the same cancer and only lived three months. It was hard to find meaning when so much of the story focused on her ministry. It was a tad repetitive as well.
April 22, 2022
What We Wish Were True is a gorgeous, inspiring collection of essays by a talented writer at the end of her young life. Ms. Quinn wrote with wisdom and humor about the family, career, and spiritual life that she adored, while grappling with a terminal brain cancer diagnosis. This book is a celebration of living as much as it is a mediation on death. I adored it.
April 27, 2022
Five million times yes. Tallu’s words open up the heart to explore the meaning of life - even in the face of death.
January 21, 2023
The holiest book I’ve ever read, her life and memory are tremendous blessings
March 24, 2022
To find your purpose in life and follow it with passion is for most, a dream. For Tallu Quin, she was living it every day working to end hunger around the world and in her home community. Then the unthinkable- glioblastoma, an aggressive incurable brain cancer. For many, this would then end the pursuit of passion at which time most of us would withdraw from society and spend our last days with family.
Tallu managed both, her family and her fight against hunger. She did all she could do to ensure that her projects would continue long past her time on earth.
This is a story told with grace, love, belief, and from the heart of a warrior. I can say it better than she did when she said “I think about how my purpose may be the same in death as it continues to be in life—surrendering to the hope that our weaknesses can be made strong, that what is broken can be made whole,” she writes.
Tallu managed both, her family and her fight against hunger. She did all she could do to ensure that her projects would continue long past her time on earth.
This is a story told with grace, love, belief, and from the heart of a warrior. I can say it better than she did when she said “I think about how my purpose may be the same in death as it continues to be in life—surrendering to the hope that our weaknesses can be made strong, that what is broken can be made whole,” she writes.
April 20, 2022
This story of a life well-lived and a death well-anticipated will grip you from the start. I sat down with this intending to meander through it slowly, but once I started I had to keep going.
Tallu Schuyler Quinn's writing style is beautiful, often almost poetic. Her insights into her inevitable passing, interwoven with recollections of her remarkable accomplishments leave the reader simultaneously sad and hopeful.
I'm passing this book on to my wife and then I will read it again.
Tallu Schuyler Quinn's writing style is beautiful, often almost poetic. Her insights into her inevitable passing, interwoven with recollections of her remarkable accomplishments leave the reader simultaneously sad and hopeful.
I'm passing this book on to my wife and then I will read it again.
June 19, 2022
Schuyler Quinn’s reflections on life and death, or rather dying, are mournful and tender. I found them to be an invitation to pause and give space to reflect on aspects of my own life. I also appreciated the circles that her writing draws coming back to many of the same thoughts more than once because in life we don’t just think about something once and then simply move on.
June 28, 2022
A quiet contemplation on facing an early death, but also on what it means to invest in life and family and relationships. And she talked a lot about her work in running the Nashville Food Project, which was really interesting.
December 19, 2023
This memoir is full of powerful reflections on career, community, and family when faced with a terminal brain cancer diagnosis. She writes about leaving her family, appreciating “normal” days and everyday moments, and processing grief. Her writing is incredibly beautiful, reflective, and thought provoking. I really enjoyed hearing her perspective on life, and felt both very sad and inspired while reading her memoir.
A few favorite quotes, of many:
- “I don’t want to be immortalized on a pedestal in my death, I just want to stay alive for as long as I can as the flawed still-alive human I am.” (58)
- “I think I was taught that spiritual life is something still, something stopped in time, something carved away from the ordinary world or rhythm of a regular day. But as I get older, I see examples of prayer all around me that look more like chores. They are varied and endless and they are ordinary.” (95)
- “Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so.” - Mary Jean Irion (155)
- “Losing something or someone invites a deep look-around and a look inward, and we find exactly what we think we lack.” (181)
A few favorite quotes, of many:
- “I don’t want to be immortalized on a pedestal in my death, I just want to stay alive for as long as I can as the flawed still-alive human I am.” (58)
- “I think I was taught that spiritual life is something still, something stopped in time, something carved away from the ordinary world or rhythm of a regular day. But as I get older, I see examples of prayer all around me that look more like chores. They are varied and endless and they are ordinary.” (95)
- “Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so.” - Mary Jean Irion (155)
- “Losing something or someone invites a deep look-around and a look inward, and we find exactly what we think we lack.” (181)
April 4, 2024
* "Love never ends"
* "There are many ways of seeing... there are gifts in loss."
* Can be ordained by church and / or by life.
* Death isn't the worst, becoming numb is. Grieving is an obligation.
* Mindful practice of the everyday can be like a prayer.
* We all look for what is right in front of us, what we already have.
* Staying angry at someone is like drinking poison and expecting that person to die.
* Embracing her children does more than words in communicating her love and imminent death
* How wonderful and awful it is to have a body
* Does heaven and its platitudes prevent true grieving?
* Grief influences the griever and the griever's subsequent generations. Grieving well or poorly matters.
* "We contain multitudes" Whitman
* Treasure a normal day. Getting sick makes that easier.
* We must act as if bearing witness matters
* "In loss, with less to use our imagination wakes up and we find the courage to go towards something we didn't think was in reach... break hope down into small parts..."
* Poverty makes it difficult or impossible to dream
* We must hold onto what we wish were true
* We assume we'll have time and we squander it. It's a limited natural resource.
* Nothing is guaranteed in marriage or life other than death.
* "There are many ways of seeing... there are gifts in loss."
* Can be ordained by church and / or by life.
* Death isn't the worst, becoming numb is. Grieving is an obligation.
* Mindful practice of the everyday can be like a prayer.
* We all look for what is right in front of us, what we already have.
* Staying angry at someone is like drinking poison and expecting that person to die.
* Embracing her children does more than words in communicating her love and imminent death
* How wonderful and awful it is to have a body
* Does heaven and its platitudes prevent true grieving?
* Grief influences the griever and the griever's subsequent generations. Grieving well or poorly matters.
* "We contain multitudes" Whitman
* Treasure a normal day. Getting sick makes that easier.
* We must act as if bearing witness matters
* "In loss, with less to use our imagination wakes up and we find the courage to go towards something we didn't think was in reach... break hope down into small parts..."
* Poverty makes it difficult or impossible to dream
* We must hold onto what we wish were true
* We assume we'll have time and we squander it. It's a limited natural resource.
* Nothing is guaranteed in marriage or life other than death.
August 15, 2023
Ok so I downloaded this audiobook for a long-ish drive, didn’t look at what it was about, just liked the title and that it was ~5 hours. I did not prepare myself to be silently sobbing while driving down I-95 as the author grapples with love and loss and living and dying in intense and joyful and heartbreaking essays chronicling the months up to her own death. It is a celebration of and a memorial to her life and to all life; to the time we spend and waste and cherish together; and to the harsh and beautiful uncertainties of the world that, if we are lucky, give way to the semblance of a meaningful existence
August 8, 2022
This book is gut wrenching! The thought of dying and leaving my young children behind is hard to imagine, but Quinn lives with this reality throughout the writing of her memoir. Her writing is beautiful and meaningful. Definitely worth the tears!
August 14, 2022
Her words are painfully precious. It’s a short book but it took me some time to finish it. “Ponder” is the word that come to mind. I wanted to linger over her thoughts. And to take this gift of observation she has given us and be worthy of receiving the gift.
September 1, 2022
I randomly stumbled across this book and was pleasantly surprised how beautiful it was! Such a sad but beautiful story of this woman’s life but also a story of joy and the beauty of life. I highly recommend it!
August 27, 2022
Beautiful, eye-opening, and heartfelt. I found myself lost in Tallu’s world and reflections. I highly recommend this book for all readers.
November 4, 2022
Beautiful and honest. A good, slow, too-short contemplation of life and death.
July 30, 2025
F me, that was a tearjerker. NSFW since you'll probably cry at some point.
May 26, 2022
No way (IMO) to "review" a memoir, so this is just a rec. I feel lucky to have finished 2 books back to back that blew me away. I'm adding this one to my top 10 list of my favorite books of all-time. Tallu, who has since passed away since the publishing of this book, writes honest and raw reflections on her life before and after her cancer diagnosis. She founded the Nashville Food Project and dedicated her life to growing and sharing food to build community bonds and alleviate hunger. The book is a mix of reflections on her work at Nashville Food Project, her family, her connection with community, and her processing of her cancer diagnosis.
Both of my grandfathers have passed away this year from cancer and I found this memoir incredibly helpful in exploring what it feels like to be grappling with your own death, with all the messiness, grief, sadness, mixed with hope, acceptance, and dignity. In witnessing my grandmother's, mother's, and father's journey through grief, as well as my own, I have found more clarity in my values and have reflected more and more on what life I want to be living. Tallu's reflections will stick with me for a long, long time.
Both of my grandfathers have passed away this year from cancer and I found this memoir incredibly helpful in exploring what it feels like to be grappling with your own death, with all the messiness, grief, sadness, mixed with hope, acceptance, and dignity. In witnessing my grandmother's, mother's, and father's journey through grief, as well as my own, I have found more clarity in my values and have reflected more and more on what life I want to be living. Tallu's reflections will stick with me for a long, long time.
April 11, 2022
I recently finished my copy of What We Wish Were True by Tallu Schuyler Quinn. I was given an advanced copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. I worried like some others that reviewed this book that the author's faith might make me not relate to her story but I was able to get past it and be happy for her that she has a strong faith in her God to comfort her in trying times. She was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer at the age of 40. She ran a non-profit that helped those with food insecurities and got a lot of joy out of her work. She shared stories about her family that she loved dearly including her husband and young children. She shared some of her thoughts on living and dying, and this book was very deeply personal. It felt like the author was having a conversation with you more than reading like a memoir. According to her bio on Amazon, she died from the disease on February 17, 2022. Tallu was 42. The book is available on shelves on April 19, 2022.
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