Instant Anger Management: Quick and Simple CBT Strategies to Defuse Anger on the Spot

by Aaron Karmin LCPC

"Excellent, easy advice for those who live with a short fuse.” —Library Journal

Quick and easy-to-learn strategies for dealing with anger on the spot!

If you struggle with problem anger, you know how much it can hurt your relationships and get in the way of your happiness. When you’re faced with a difficult situation or anger trigger, it’s all too easy to get swept up in your emotions. That’s why you need quick and immediate tools you can use in the moment—whenever anger takes hold.

Based in proven-effective cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), Instant Anger Management is a take-anywhere guide for managing anger—whenever and wherever you are. Using quick and simple “try this” interventions—such as breathing, acceptance, and self-expression—you’ll learn to stay grounded, identify your triggers, and balance your emotions. You’ll also find tips and strategies to help you maintain a more positive outlook on life.

Packed with skills to help

Express yourself in healthy waysDeal with frustrationFind validation for your emotionsHandle feelings of regretStop being defensive

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Health

129 pages, Kindle Edition

Published October 1, 2021

Reviews

[Kelly MacCormac · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an uncorrected proof by Net Galley in exchange for an honest review, the book is subject to change so any quotations may not be included in the final publication.

Reading the synopsis, I felt completely intrigued by this book! As a person with borderline personality disorder, I wanted to learn more about CBT therapy, ways to better manage my own anger and how to express myself better.

The book was split into five parts which included learning how anger works, the importance of taking care of yourself, building a frustration tolerance, maintaining a positive outlook, and how to express yourself.

The book started off by discussing the minor things that can build up and cause anger but a quote I felt struck a chord within the first pages was on “The key to our experience of emotion is our interpretation of events - not the event themselves”. Quotes could be subject to change but the book focuses on the importance of how people perceive things and how this can impact anger.

I feel like this book would be helpful for people on both sides of the coin that deal with managing their own anger or are close to someone that struggles to manage their anger. It is definitely a great book for people that are on any level to learn ways to begin managing or improve how they manage their anger.

There were topics and discussion on areas that I’ve previously incorporated into managing my anger but this book helped me to improve on what I already know! I plan on incorporating many of the tips and ideas on how to manage anger into my daily life and I genuinely think this book could help a lot of people!

[Melody · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book really is amazing at explaining my own mind to me in ways that are actually useful! I got maybe 10 pages in and already had a bunch of highlights, and I ended up buying the book for myself. In fact, it's been a week or so since I've started reading it with my husband and I've already begun to see a difference in how we both handle miscommunications and things.

I recommend this book to everyone, even if you don't think you need to learn how to better manage and understand your emotions; not just anger.

[Jordan]

Great reminders and helpful tips inside. Would recommend this to clients.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am using this book with a client who is experiencing rage after profound loss. It’s good for her because it is short and direct, and she doesn’t have time to read anything lengthy. I think it is a solid guide.

[Rachael · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received a free copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. I have had some experience with CBT therapy in my personal life, so I was very interested in reading this book to discover more strategies for dealing with anger, and I think that the author really delivered on showing how to express anger in many different healthy ways. The author touched upon relaxation and meditation techniques, including a very descriptive and easy to follow section on breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation techniques. I also think it's focus on empathy and communication were very helpful to me, and in some ways the book simulates role playing exercises used in CBT therapy because it gives many different examples of what you can say and how you can respond to defuse the anger of other people and within yourself. There's also a wonderful focus on self care as a preventative measure against anger. This book had me thinking in new ways about my emotions, and I know that I will be implementing many of the suggestions of the book next time I feel angry or I come into contact with someone feeling that way. This book can be such a great help to so many people. I really felt like the author was knowledgeable about this specific branch of therapy and seemed to have expert and practiced recommendations on this subject.

[Kimberly Barnes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anger is a common emotion felt by all people. Especially today, with the turmoil that everyone has experienced within the past year, anger is a common emotion expressed by all. It’s not usually the big things that are the tipping point to anger. Often, it may be the little, tiny things that lead to excessive anger episodes. This book attempts to show the reader how to cope with anger and how to control your anger. Part 1 examines how anger works. Part 2 details how to take care of yourself including: improving sleep, eating well, breathing deeply, engaging in mindfulness, using journaling, and learning progressive muscle relaxation. Part 3 is working on building frustration tolerance. Some skills targeted in this part of the book include: not letting things affect you personally, letting go of some responsibility, accepting yourself, and forgiving others. Part 4 of the book works on improving your ability to be positive and how to change the way that you talk to yourself. Part 5 targets improved expressive communication. This book will help the reader learn how to manage anger in a healthy way. Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the advance review copy in exchange for my honest review.

[Pninch · Rating 3 out of 5]

Many thanks to author Aaron Karmin, New Harbinger Publications and NetGally for an ARC of this book. This is my honest opinion.

Anger management is a very serious issue!

I you suffer from anger issues or any other emotional problem which affects your ability to function well, you should seek professional help.

Having said that, this book suggests some good exercises to promote a healthy and balanced sense of wellbeing, calming methods and tips to better self-awareness.

As far as self help books go, this book was good. It had a good overview of the topic, and some good suggestions. It would not, in my opinion, be an effective tool in itself, but quite useful along with professional therapy.

[Jackie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is useful. One part I particularly likes was clear advice for practicing empathy and effective communication, especially highlight the things not to do.

Just before this, I read Anger Management for Dummies, which is more comprehensive than this book. I would probably recommend that one over this. Both are good, but I prefer the more detailed information of the for dummies book.

[Sam Henry · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very practical and easy read. Some might say it's a little oversimplified but it's easily understood by readers from middle school on.

Aaron explores the myriad causes of anger from the obvious to the subtle, from physical to mental. He offers simple advice for calming anger then explores each of these causes in depth. The author makes good use of a format that shows how our thoughts lead to anger then suggests alternative thought processes.

This is a handy little book that will help you begin to get a handle on your anger before leading you through the steps to more healthy responses. This book could be used as a reference or simply kept handy for when you need a refresher. Great little book. There's a ton of wisdom in these 152 pages.

[Heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a quick and simple read. If you have already learned about the basics of handling your personal anger as well as communicating with a person having big emotions, you probably won’t learn much from this book. However, I did glean some useful information and the book offered some great reminders in the power of acknowledging another’s experience, even if I don’t agree with it.

I received an ARC of this book courtesy of the publisher and NetGalley. The opinions are my own.

[Tom Quinn · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a solid reference guide for someone already practicing CBT, but I read the whole thing and there wasn't anything I'd call an "instant" strategy to be found. More like reminders of the long-term habits and mindsets one might cultivate specifically to resolve and move through anger, i.e. sample wording for positive self-talk and a few suggestions for new ways to view situations when angry.

3 stars. Helpful, but the title overpromises. There are no silver bullets here.

[Ashley Hodge · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s a very short, quick read. I did find some of the techniques useful. Some of them, I have already been doing. If you are looking for insight on how to deal with your anger, I would recommend this book. The suggestions are practical ones that can be implemented on the spot for some relief. For example, deep breathing. Seems silly but honestly just taking deep breaths to relax you before you blow a fuse is a game changer.

[Aisha · Rating 5 out of 5]

succint and to the point, however, I wouldn't reccomend this to anyone with deep extreme hateful murderous rage, taking a deep breath doesnt help with that, this is for people with basic mommy or daddy issues rage, not Boss level rage

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a quick read full of ideas and strategies to help defuse anger. I found it to be a helpful read and recommend it.

[Nic Lishko · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lots of great tips, feedback and takeaways. Another solid read on my self improvement kick.

[Bill · Rating 1 out of 5]

Academic but not practical.

[Fiona Smith · Rating 2 out of 5]

There is nothing "instant" about the strategies in this book.

[Gothsong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really great examples and strategies to deal with big feelings and difficult people.

[Sarah Shiley · Rating 4 out of 5]

short, easy to understand. Some concrete examples and not just generalities. Would be good for a teenager or an adult.

[Aarthika · Rating 4 out of 5]

short and straight to the point

[Susie Tao · Rating 5 out of 5]

The first half of the book has many good techniques. The second half is sort of about how to deal with angry people.

[Ankita · Rating 2 out of 5]

lol that i read this but it wasn’t bad

[Laun · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a an easy to read how-to book for managing and expressing your anger. You can easily turn to any page and read a tip that will support you in that moment with your anger. The CBT strategies are simple to understand and the self-care tips included support this. Feelings of anger are part of being human and understanding and accepting this will bring us all closer to accepting ourselves in all our human glory and discomfort.

[Kelly Kroll · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked up this book to help offer advice to those around me affected by rage and ended up really resonating with the lessons in this book. It helped me work through big emotions.