How Do We Know Ourselves?: Curiosities and Marvels of the Human Mind

by David G. Myers

A delightful tour of the wonders of our humanity from David G. Myers, the award-winning professor and author of psychology's bestselling textbook.



How Do We Know Ourselves? is a thought-provoking book about psychological science insights on our everyday lives. David G. Myers shares astute observations and sharp-witted wisdom to enable people to think smarter and to delight in the wonders of their lives.

Myers's explorations range from why we so often fear the wrong things to how simply going for a walk with someone can increase rapport and empathy. He covers why we repeatedly mishear song lyrics, and how President Obama's choice to wear only gray or blue suits supported his decision-making focus. And Myers explores the powers and perils of our intuition, explaining why anything can seem obvious once it happens.

Each essay offers fresh insight into our sometimes bewildering but ever fascinating lives. Myers inspires us to grapple with the timeless question How do we know ourselves? Engaging and intellectually provocative, he brings his wealth of knowledge from more than fifty years of teaching and writing about psychology to this lively and informative essay collection.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Science, Self Help, Audiobook, Mental Health, Philosophy

272 pages, Hardcover

First published November 1, 2022

About the author

David G. Myers is a professor of Psychology at Hope College in Michigan, and the author of 17 books, including popular textbooks entitled Psychology, Exploring Psychology, Social Psychology and several general-audience books dealing with issues related to Christian faith as well as scientific psychology.

Reviews

[Petra X]

As the blurb says, the author "explains why we repeatedly mishear song lyrics and how the color of President Obama’s suits aided in his decision-making." That hooked me. The author has been writing psychology books, including text books, for many years. What has got me on the fence (hooked? fence?) is that he writes from a Christian point of view.

In a pure science book, the religion of the author is irrelevant. But in a social psychology book, where the author has previously written other social psychology books from an overtly Christian point of view, I'm wondering if that frame of reference he will use in providing the reader with insights into ourselves in the forty essays of the book is going to be Christian?

If it's going to be Christian, it's not going to be an objective, psychology-based look at our minds anymore than if it was from a professor of any other religion who had religion uppermost in their minds. It doesn't matter what religion the author is, only if they view our minds through that lens rather than scientifically, and since the author is a social psychologist, my betting is that he does.

On the fence but not off the hook about buying this.

[Diane S ☔ · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Shealea · Rating 3 out of 5]

A great, beginner-friendly, and easy-to-digest introduction to psychological science and human behavior. Aside from the use of clear and accessible language in these essays, Myers offers multiple stories and anecdotes, which would be helpful in providing real-world examples within a class setting (or at least that's what I imagine).

However, I would caution that the author's Christian faith is very evident in the text, affecting the overall POV of the book. Not necessarily a bad thing, but definitely not everyone's cup of tea.

Recommended with caution.

[dreamgirlreading · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very interesting information delivered in an easy to understand format.

[Emily Nicoletta · Rating 4 out of 5]

How Do We Know Ourselves was a genuinely entertaining and informative book. It was chalk full of really interesting data and deep dives into human psychology and how our minds work, but did so in a way that was very entertaining and digestible.

Myers managed to flawlessly avoid the fate of so many books within this genre; his writing was smart without being stuffy and conversely, never ever tried to hard to be overly casual.

If you like psychology and are interested in learning some really interesting details over how our minds control us (and maybe even some “How To Win Friends and Influence People”-esque manipulation tactics) this is worth a read.

Myers is definitely a new dream dinner party guest of mine!

[marshponds · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a great audiobook because each chapter is basically a standalone, plainly written article on a different interesting fact about psychology and the human brain (e.g., biases, fallacies, etc.).

I enjoyed it, but ironically the author suffered from the very same biases about which he wrote. In particular, he could have easily critiqued both left and right for adopting various fallacies, biases, etc., but he criticized only the right. The book would be more credible if he would have demonstrated a willingness to challenge his own beliefs (especially ones that are easily challenged using the same tools discussed in this book). Indeed, that was a major theme of the book.

[A · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a really informative book that covered a variety of subjects.
Using clear language Myers discusses ways we think we know ourselves and explores whether or not that’s true.

Very interesting read for people who want to learn more about their brains.


ARC provided via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Aaron Mikulsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

40 short chapters that will peak your interest. I especially liked chapter 12 on pride, 18 on polarization, and 20 on the psychology of division. Some of the studies and examples are a bit far fetched while others will blow you away. Certain examples have been used (over used) in hundreds of other books. I recommend this book overall, however.

Here's a little teaser:
Group polarization: when like minds discuss, their attitudes often become more extreme. Discussion among like-minded people tends to strengthen pre-existing attitudes. Like minds polarize, whereas opinion diversity moderates views. Terrorist mentality usually emerges slowly, among people who share a grievance. As they interact in isolation, their views grow more extreme. Increasingly, they categorize the world as “us” against “them.” 

Three recent cultural changes provide fertile soil for extreme group polarization: the Internet, partisan cable TV, and the geography of division - likeness leads to liking and similarity breeds content. Within the echo chambers of like-minded networks, viewpoints become more extreme. Small differences often loom so large. Suspicion becomes conviction and disagreements escalate to demonization. No matter our similarities with others, our attention focuses on differences. Having a social identity – a sense of “we-ness” – bolsters our self-concept. It feels good to take pride in one’s group. This “in-group bias” - a preference for one’s own community - comes at a cost. During conflict, we-feeling rises. During wars, patriotism surges. Group solidarity soars when facing a common enemy. 

I loved this: “Turning today’s closed fists into tomorrow’s open arms requires recognizing the relative modesty of our own overblown differences, finding our deeper commonalities, defining a larger ‘us,’ communicating across group lines, and discovering transcendent goals.” It’s an “Omnicultural” perspective that both recognizes commonality and respects differences. We need to embrace and renew the founding idea of America: diversity within equity. E pluribus unum: one out of many.

[Alison Rini · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy to read format - short essays about different psychological phenomena. My son’s AP Psych textbook is by the same author so it was kind of fun (for me) reading simultaneously.

[Anna Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.25

[Erin M · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a “bathroom book”. Filled with little 3-5 page mini psychology lessons, it’s interesting, but there aren’t any real ah-has in here. Overall an enjoyable read for me in between meetings, waiting to pick up the kids, or any time you’ve got 5 minutes to spare.

[andie z (amzreads) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this really fascinating. I love learning about this kind of stuff and this audiobook was entertaining, interesting, and informative. I enjoyed how the information was presented in a way that made you think, but not feel like you were reading a textbook, and the narrator did a great job.

I definitely recommend this as a great intro to psychology for those who are interested in it but don't have much prior knowledge!

Thank you so much Macmillan Audio and NetGalley for the advance copy in exchange for my honest review.

[Erica · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a different kind of review. The book itself has short chapters with easily graspable information on our inherent biases (confirmation, endowment, sensory perception), which have become well-known through Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky's work and its many offshoots.

I am not commenting on the substance of the book, but rather the examples Myers uses to illustrate these biases/effects.

Early on, I noticed that the real-world examples he uses reflect a particular ideological/political orientation, one very commonly shared by academics in the social sciences these days. So be it. In my view, this detracts from the quality, and possible the veracity of the claims, as choices made of what research to showcase, or what issues to discuss, may derive from one's personal worldview. But I read on, because human beings are fascinating, and I am always looking to understand us better.

But about halfway through the book I reached my tolerance for the one-sided examples cited, and lost the desire to finish the book. This is very unusual for me (my Goodreads shelves have only books that I have read in their entirety), but I was sufficiently bothered by this to not wish to continue, especially when I saw some of the chapter headings of the final section.

Here's the nub of my concern: The author is a writer of textbooks. Textbooks have been considered 'impartial,' 'objective,' like encyclopedias, so students are getting the best of the information available at the time. But if textbooks sport examples that reflect the writer's bias (not so implicit), that will be absorbed along with the rest of the content.

Polarity is a big problem, but the less obvious but nonetheless ideological interpolation of political viewpoints through examples leads to confirmation bias, if you agree with these views (you may not even notice this, as it is already part of your worldview), or, as in my case, increasing discomfort and disappointment with the choices.

That is my 2 cents, FWIW.

[Natalie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This books starts off a little slow but becomes more and more interesting as you continue to read.

The author breaks down many psychological ideas and studies into easily digestible pieces. He provides stories and anecdotes to accompany these theories. He also lays out when there are differences between results in studies and what we would intuitively think. For example, there is now data backing up personality differences in the birth order of children. The first born is not more likely to be an overachiever, contrary to what we might think based on our own lives.

I especially loved the integration with new research and how the eild of psychology has changed over-time. This book also references events or people from our current time to give examples. Some people might be slightly turned off by this.

For people really interested in psychology, you might not need to read the book because the topics are pretty basic. However, for people who are new to science related books or self help books, this is the perfect introduction.

The Audiobook narrator did a nice job. It was very pleasant to listen to during a road trip.

Thank you to Net galley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Beth Melillo · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lot to like about this book if you want something accessible about psychology and behavioral science that is also written in simple language and with contemporary examples.

I liked the way the book was set up, as 40 short essays and I (mostly) enjoyed David G. Myers liberal use of anecdotes, quotes, and aphorisms. It's definitely more accessible than 'Thinking Fast and Slow,' clearly for a broader audience and it's way better than just shoving the cognitive bias codex in someone's face if you want to talk about brain findings.

That said, particularly for me, Part 1 tread ground I had read or listened to so many times before (in academic journals, other science writing, and podcasts like Hidden Brain) it just wasn't as engaging. I found Part 2 and Part 3 more interesting and practical... but by the end of Part 3, I had hit my limit of reading this particular writing style.

For psychologists or other behavioral scientists avidly following along the replication crisis since 2015, and more recently the Francesca Gino and Dan Ariely scandal in 2023, I got a tickle out of essay 40 - "Do Replication Failures Discredit Psychological Science." It's a good response to have in your back pocket.

[Stephen · Rating 4 out of 5]

How do we know ourselves is an engaging, informative, and entertaining book about people and our relationship to other people, Organized as a series of short essays, it’s a great book to read when you don’t have large blocks of time. Because of the brevity, this isn’t a deep dive into any one subject, but it is a great source to spark conversation with friends, and a desire to learn more.

I started the book skeptically, as I’d read books that cover the subject matter more deeply, but after a few chapters Meyer’s engaging writing pulled me in. He tackles subjects ranging from proverbs that contradict each other, to attention, to bias and our interactions with others. Some chapters will leave you wanting to learn more, and for that you can check out the references at the end. There are more detailed books on some of the topics, to be sure, so the book isn't for everyone. But as someone who's explored some of these topic areas, I found it to be a engaging.

If you are looking for a quick read -- in particular one that is easy to consume in small chunks of time, consider How Do We Know Ourselves.

[Amber · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like millions of others, am very curious about how the mind works and how everything is pieced together. While I have not read anything by this author before, the way the author writes and the information he presents is involved in mini-essays, and I think that was the best way for him to write this book! Nothing is too substantial or too much for the reader because once you finish that essay, you have a stopping point where you can contemplate what you have read and what it covered.
I also loved that even if you had no medical background, you could follow along with the author and see how psychology can and is applied to every day matters! This is a book that I will be adding to my collection because it's one that I would love to reread and absorb more of his thoughts! I also loved that listening to this audiobook was not like listening to a textbook, the way the author wrote each essay and explained everything was as if you were having a conversation! Thank you, Macmillan Audio and Netgalley, for the extraordinary opportunity to listen to this one! It was a definite treat!

[Ramona Boldizsar · Rating 4 out of 5]

O carte ușor de citit și interesantă, de popularizare a principalelor descoperiri despre viața noastră cu ajutorul științei psihologiei, dar cu mici incursiuni și în alte domenii. E foarte utilă dacă vrei să-ți faci o idee cam care e direcția unor specialiști în probleme ce țin de psihologie dar și „natura umană”. Ca modestia, încrederea în sine, singurătatea, relația cu ecranele, dar și relația cu moartea și, de exemplu, ce înseamnă experiența celor care, aflați în stop cardiac, „mor” și revin la viață prin resuscitare (probabil eseul meu preferat, alături de cele două în care vorbește despre impactul mediului vs impactul genelor asupra dezvoltării personalității copiilor). O grămadă de subiecte interesante prezentate pe scurt. E utilă și dacă vrei un mic ghid de la care să pornești să aprofundezi anumite subiecte, avem 190 pag de carte și restul pagini cu bibliografie (resurse, titluri, autori aranjați tematic).

Easy and useful read! :)

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought this was interesting and clearly laid out, though a lot of it I knew already; I'm not sure if it's a YA book, but it would be easy for teens to understand and could offer some good essays kids could read for class discussions. The one thing I took issue with was when he was talking about how we feared the wrong things, and how kids feared school shootings more than things that were "more likely" to occur. As there was a school shooting last year at the first school I worked for, and two days ago a shooting at my brother's high school, I don't think it's an unreasonable fear, unfortunately. I think we all have some connection to a school shooting, and sadly it seems just a matter of time before we have many more connections--or are even involved in one ourselves, if we attend or work at a school. Thanks to Libro.FM for a free educator's copy of the book.

[Jordan Fernandez · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ultimately, I wanted to read this book to supplement my lessons in AP Psychology, and I believe it has helped me to do so! I have already incorporated some of his evidence into my lectures this semester, and I’m particularly looking forward to starting our unit on personality since Myers offers the most new information in this realm.

However, I already use one of Myers’ textbooks in my course, and I was hoping that this would have a lot more new information than it does. I was already familiar with almost all of it, down to the specific examples that he references. I was disappointed to find that this reads a little like a condensed version of his textbook and hoped it might be even more personal. (I was surprised to see more of his personal political biases here, although they are the same ones that I hold toward our political parties today!)

3.5 stars rounded up to 4 from me!

[Lauren Connor · Rating 3 out of 5]

While I thoroughly enjoyed the easy to read and comprehend nature of this book, and while much of the content is widely applicable to any human, my biggest issue lies in the marketing. I don't mind the inclusion of religious ideology in books, so long as it is made known to the reader prior to beginning the book so they can make an educated decision based on if they want to read it. To me, the inclusion of Christian ideas did not bug me necessarily, though I wish it had been advertised and marketed as such. Yes, this is primarily about psychology, but not fully, and having it marketed as such would have been a more truthful introduction to the book. That said, if you don't mind religion included in books that are geared toward another field and subject, this is an insightful read and bountiful too - plenty of knowledge to be gleaned from the text.

[Roses for Reading · Rating 4 out of 5]

Learning about the brain and it's unique processes is so fascinating. This book does a fantastic job of introducing and explaining several psychological principles in a way that most anyone can understand. Myers discussed each topic by including a small description and references to a study involving the theory. I enjoyed how he made the topics come to life and easy to understand. He also discussed how different psychological theories have changed over recent years and what seems to still be applicable. As someone who had taken several psychology courses at college, I recognized most of the topics, however, someone who is not familiar with psychology would still be able to understand this book.
I listened to this as an audiobook and the narrator was very easy to understand and was enjoyable to listen to. One potential drawback of this book is the references to scriptures. Since the author is a professor at a Christian college it is not surprising that he would include scriptures, however, some people may not like this. Overall the book was very informative and nice to listen to. Thank you to netgalley for providing me with an advanced listening copy of this book.

[Amelia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Myers compiles vast amounts of psychological and sociological research and pares its findings down for us to understand. Why do we agree with conflicting idioms? Is there truth to birth order psychology? And just what is decision fatigue? These little tidbits of information help comprise who we are on a basic, day-to-day manner. The way we perceive ourselves helps us to understand how others act--and how we interact with them.

This was a great book, perfect for reading in short spurts with chapters no longer than ten pages. Myers uses a variety of examples and refers to plenty of studies, so you know that what he's sharing has been well-studied and observed. A fantastic read for armchair psychologists and those curious about how we feel about ourselves in a subconscious way!

[John F. Weiss · Rating 4 out of 5]

The answer to the book’s title is straightforward and comes a few pages in: we come to know ourselves (well, we try at least) by being first-person observers of our own actions, watching how others react to us, and becoming conscious of how we imitate their actions. That’s just a teaser, however. The thrust of the book examines the latest research on a compendium of forty psychological concepts that illuminate common aspects of our daily existence. Want to learn more about intuition, judgement, humility, relationships, identity, polarization, narcissism? The book uses short chapters and cogent examples to cover all these and more, making for an episodic and easy read. Lots of Easter eggs you can use to color your next group conversation.

[Scott Lupo · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kind of a whimsy book about social science experiments and the possible conclusions from those experiments. I love reading about these experiments for their ingenuity, uniqueness, and results. Plus it is science, which means others will try to replicate and reproduce the same results. Social science experiments always surprise and delight me in some fashion. I like them because so many of them show that as humans we really have so much in common. We fall for the same illusions, believe in the same falsities, and think we are all so different and unique. The nature vs. nurture argument is always present and worthy of discussion. This book is very general in nature and not detailed, but then notes section at the end can guide the reader to the more nuanced and detailed material.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not sure why this is rated so poorly.

It is essentially a psychology trivia book.

David Myers summarizes the most important and interesting findings in the field of psychology in 40 bite-sized chapters.

Do not expect in-depth nuanced examinations. Instead, treat this as an introduction to concepts which you can then dive further into through other works.

The book is divided into 3 sections:
1. Who Am I?: focusing on the self
2. Who Are We?: exploring our relationships
3. What in the World?: taking a psychological eye to the larger world around us

It's a good thing that the final chapter of the book addressed the replication crisis in psychology research. It explained why some "questionable" studies were included in the book.

[Corey Shannon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Picked this up at the beginning of the summer since it’s been on my shelf for a long time after getting it at a conference. Maybe a 3.5. Started out as a 1, but my opinion grew after I got about 30% through the book.

My low initial impression was largely due to unmet expectations since I thought this book was one connected set of observations about identity formation, supported by some of Myers research as a social psychologist. It was not that, but short, unrelated “articles” that made up each chapter.

Once I was able to alter those expectations and engage with his work as it was written, I found it engaging and useful. Some good thoughts and collected research from the field in here about confirmation bias, growth mindset, social connection, belonging and more.

[CharlotteChai · Rating 4 out of 5]

Goodreads provides a nice summary of Myers' collection of essays on psychological research that pertains to living life as a being human . . . "Myers's explorations range from why we so often fear the wrong things to how simply going for a walk with someone can increase rapport and empathy. He covers why we repeatedly mishear song lyrics, and how President Obama's choice to wear only gray or blue suits supported his decision-making focus. And Myers explores the powers and perils of our intuition, explaining why anything can seem obvious once it happens. Each essay offers fresh insight into our sometimes bewildering but ever fascinating lives."

[Katherine · Rating 5 out of 5]

An insightful and entertaining listen backed by research and the author's own experiences. There are a variety of topics covered. I found the "six tricks to build a healthy habit" chapter particularly helpful. I plan to utilize this for my resolutions this year. There, I announced it to the world (tip number 3)! A myriad of applications abound for the knowledge encapsulated in this ebook. I found the chapter on near death experiences (NDEs) also quite interesting. I plan to reread this a few more times, as there is lots of useful information for teachers like myself.

[Prianka · Rating 4 out of 5]

People named Dennis are disproportionately more likely than others to become dentists. Human's prefer the mirror image of their own faces more than the actual image of their face. This is a book of unintuitive scientific facts such as these, all presented in short, easy to understand essays. I thoroughly enjoyed the author's concise writing style and structure which made the 'curiosities' more memorable. I will likely pull out random facts from this book whenever I need to fill an awkward silence at a party.