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Do You Remember?
This is a book about an enduring love. In this book there is romance and kindness and the strength of the human spirit in adversity.
There are three people in this marriage and one of them is slowly fading away…
This is a book about dementia.
Only it’s not.
What this book is really about is people. It just so happens that in the very centre of this book there is someone battling with dementia. These things don’t happen in a vacuum though, so there are other people battling with her too. Dementia is cruel and it takes from everyone that it touches.
Everything we do in life causes ripples. There are consequences and effects and those close to someone who is suffering and edging closer and closer to death are drawn into their battle. The more they care, the deeper into the battle they are drawn.
Melissa is dying.
This wasn’t the death that she had envisaged, not that she had gotten around to giving it much thought, but it is certainly far sooner than she had ever anticipated, especially for this type of death. If she’d given it any consideration, a death at her age would have entailed a protracted period of partying and fast living and a sudden, dramatic and romanticised ending.
People of Melissa’s age don’t make a habit of dying.
They definitely don’t make a habit of getting diagnosed with dementia.
James, Melissa’s husband, takes a hold of her hand and he squeezes it. He intends to keep holding her hand all the way through this part of her journey. He doesn’t know what else he can do.
Neither of them have a clue as to where they are going or how they will deal with the trials and tribulations awaiting them as a disease that deconstructs someone from the inside out takes a hold of Melissa and changes both of their lives forever.
They are going to try though and that is all they have, the determination to make the best of it and to continue to share their lives.
They made a promise.
Through thick and thin and until death parts them, they will live their lives together, help and support each other and grow and learn more about each other, and…
…the rules have changed and so they are going to have to change and adapt in the face of a terrible life-altering and life-ending disease.
This is a story about people and their courage, compassion and sheer bloody mindedness in the face of a certain and tragic end, and their capacity to love and to see a brighter side, even when there appears to be none…
…because there is one, despite everything, there is always good in the world. Sometimes you have to fight to find that good, and that’s a battle that is always worth waging.
There are three people in this marriage and one of them is slowly fading away…
This is a book about dementia.
Only it’s not.
What this book is really about is people. It just so happens that in the very centre of this book there is someone battling with dementia. These things don’t happen in a vacuum though, so there are other people battling with her too. Dementia is cruel and it takes from everyone that it touches.
Everything we do in life causes ripples. There are consequences and effects and those close to someone who is suffering and edging closer and closer to death are drawn into their battle. The more they care, the deeper into the battle they are drawn.
Melissa is dying.
This wasn’t the death that she had envisaged, not that she had gotten around to giving it much thought, but it is certainly far sooner than she had ever anticipated, especially for this type of death. If she’d given it any consideration, a death at her age would have entailed a protracted period of partying and fast living and a sudden, dramatic and romanticised ending.
People of Melissa’s age don’t make a habit of dying.
They definitely don’t make a habit of getting diagnosed with dementia.
James, Melissa’s husband, takes a hold of her hand and he squeezes it. He intends to keep holding her hand all the way through this part of her journey. He doesn’t know what else he can do.
Neither of them have a clue as to where they are going or how they will deal with the trials and tribulations awaiting them as a disease that deconstructs someone from the inside out takes a hold of Melissa and changes both of their lives forever.
They are going to try though and that is all they have, the determination to make the best of it and to continue to share their lives.
They made a promise.
Through thick and thin and until death parts them, they will live their lives together, help and support each other and grow and learn more about each other, and…
…the rules have changed and so they are going to have to change and adapt in the face of a terrible life-altering and life-ending disease.
This is a story about people and their courage, compassion and sheer bloody mindedness in the face of a certain and tragic end, and their capacity to love and to see a brighter side, even when there appears to be none…
…because there is one, despite everything, there is always good in the world. Sometimes you have to fight to find that good, and that’s a battle that is always worth waging.
302 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 7, 2021
84 people are currently reading
39 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
June 4, 2022
Heartbreaking but positive
I spent my life working in mental health and dealt with families suffering the trauma of early onset dementia, admittedly not as young as Melissa but it's always devastating.
That realisation that those missed opportunities will stay forever missed, the future life you planned is going to be different and difficult.
This is not your usual 'living with dementia ' story. Melissa and James are highly articulate, and they do talk about how the future will change, but they talk about the positives of what they can do.
There's no intrusion from the caregivers, it's all focused on their relationship and how they deal with it.
Helen is a marvellous example of a thoughtful, philosophical nurse, they are around you know!
It was a really hard read in terms of the emotion, but I really liked the way it focused on the couple, not the professionals and their input.
I felt really drained by the end as I really cared about them both. Always the sign of a good book of this type.
I spent my life working in mental health and dealt with families suffering the trauma of early onset dementia, admittedly not as young as Melissa but it's always devastating.
That realisation that those missed opportunities will stay forever missed, the future life you planned is going to be different and difficult.
This is not your usual 'living with dementia ' story. Melissa and James are highly articulate, and they do talk about how the future will change, but they talk about the positives of what they can do.
There's no intrusion from the caregivers, it's all focused on their relationship and how they deal with it.
Helen is a marvellous example of a thoughtful, philosophical nurse, they are around you know!
It was a really hard read in terms of the emotion, but I really liked the way it focused on the couple, not the professionals and their input.
I felt really drained by the end as I really cared about them both. Always the sign of a good book of this type.
January 5, 2022
An amazing book!
I think that this is a must-read, although it takes a while to go with the story. Relax and go with it for the pay-off. This is sad and loving both.
I think that this is a must-read, although it takes a while to go with the story. Relax and go with it for the pay-off. This is sad and loving both.
February 18, 2022
A very light hearted thoughtful read
A definite page turner. A story that just about every one can relate to. This is the 3rd of Jeds work i,ve enjoyed immensely
A definite page turner. A story that just about every one can relate to. This is the 3rd of Jeds work i,ve enjoyed immensely
December 15, 2021
Two people in their thirties, busy with their lives and with it all to play for.
Busy is what a lot of people fill their thirties with, and most of us are fortunate to come out the other side relatively unscathed and with that decade under our belts.
That isn't the case for everyone and sometimes life happens regardless of anyone's plans or dreams and let's face it, things seldom go to plan...
In this case a completely new form of early on-set dementia turns Melissa and James' world upside down and gradually empties it.
This book explores how one person makes the most of a bad situation, it's about love and strength and I loved reading it once it was finished and I was glad that it resonated with the people in the caring professions who I asked to review it.
Busy is what a lot of people fill their thirties with, and most of us are fortunate to come out the other side relatively unscathed and with that decade under our belts.
That isn't the case for everyone and sometimes life happens regardless of anyone's plans or dreams and let's face it, things seldom go to plan...
In this case a completely new form of early on-set dementia turns Melissa and James' world upside down and gradually empties it.
This book explores how one person makes the most of a bad situation, it's about love and strength and I loved reading it once it was finished and I was glad that it resonated with the people in the caring professions who I asked to review it.
February 5, 2023
What a wonderful read about a young couple's relationship in dealing with dementia. I found it very emtional and intriguing and i couldn't put it down. The husband gained much wisdom in dealing with himself and his wife while talking to Helen, a beautiful caregiver of dementia patients. I would highly recommend the read.
May 9, 2024
I struggled at times to keep reading this emotional book.
A story that just about every one can relate to, sad how dementia affects family and friends as well as the individual with it.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews