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Everything is Temporary: Illustrated Contemplations on How Death Shapes Our Lives
A beautiful, illustrated reflection on death, mortality, and what it means to be human
It is an unavoidable fact of life that one day you will die. Until very recently, death was a subject many people hid from, but in a post-pandemic world in which a new generation is beginning to care for aging parents, it’s time to start talking about dying. In this at-times-heartbreaking yet heartwarming book, author and illustrator Iris Gottlieb explores death from all angles—from the physical, such as the ways your remains could be handled, to the emotional, including grief and grappling with your own mortality. By the end, you will start to answer the question, So how do you live with death? Part explainer, part conversation-starter, and part helping-hand to accept the inevitable, Everything is Temporary will encourage conversations with loved ones and invite introspection to find greater internal peace.
It is an unavoidable fact of life that one day you will die. Until very recently, death was a subject many people hid from, but in a post-pandemic world in which a new generation is beginning to care for aging parents, it’s time to start talking about dying. In this at-times-heartbreaking yet heartwarming book, author and illustrator Iris Gottlieb explores death from all angles—from the physical, such as the ways your remains could be handled, to the emotional, including grief and grappling with your own mortality. By the end, you will start to answer the question, So how do you live with death? Part explainer, part conversation-starter, and part helping-hand to accept the inevitable, Everything is Temporary will encourage conversations with loved ones and invite introspection to find greater internal peace.
176 pages, Paperback
Published August 23, 2022
3 people are currently reading
463 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 54 reviews
August 27, 2023
Everything is Temporary is an illustrated collection of concise but deep thoughts about mortality. Iris Gottlieb understands that thinking about death is scary, and it's not a subject we discuss in polite company or even with family, depending on the family. However, Everything is Temporary shows that there are drawbacks to avoiding the topic.
Practically speaking, if we avoid the subject with family, we may neglect to draw up a last will and testament and a living will. We may neglect to explain that we want to donate our organs (indication on a driver's license isn't enough). If we avoid talking about death, we can't make known how we want our body laid to rest.
On the philosophical level, remembering we die helps us appreciate living. This is similar to how we can't know happiness without knowing sadness. Remembering we die, and that we can die at any moment, also puts problems in proper perspective.
Gottlieb points out that death is a process, not an event; in a sense, because death is inevitable, every second we’re alive we aren’t actually living but dying. She thinks we need to get more comfortable thinking about death but acknowledges that accepting its inevitability doesn’t make loss any less painful. It could, however, make us better prepared psychologically, and in that way, make it less scary.
The book explores how we define death and also asks a few probing questions:
Everything is Temporary is gentle and respectful--and thankfully free of triteness. It’s not about carpe diem and crossing items off a bucket list. It’s not religious, and it’s not about “moving past” grief. It’d be easy to string together a series of shallow clichéd statements, but those don’t help anyone. It’s also modern and with-it. The mention of eco-friendly mushroom death-suits is pleasantly surprising, as is acknowledgement that prolonging life can be detrimental to quality of life.
Gottlieb jumps from one thought to another in a style like stream-of-consciousness, so the thought sequences could stand to be tighter and more cohesive. But this book is about contemplation. She doesn’t dig deep down to the core; she shows readers where to dig. Even so, most readers of this book will probably never feel fully comfortable thinking about death, no matter how much they think on it--and such discomfort isn’t weird. Everything is Temporary is effective as a motivator, (hard) conversation-starter, and meditation on something inevitable.
Complementary reading: Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End
Practically speaking, if we avoid the subject with family, we may neglect to draw up a last will and testament and a living will. We may neglect to explain that we want to donate our organs (indication on a driver's license isn't enough). If we avoid talking about death, we can't make known how we want our body laid to rest.
On the philosophical level, remembering we die helps us appreciate living. This is similar to how we can't know happiness without knowing sadness. Remembering we die, and that we can die at any moment, also puts problems in proper perspective.
Gottlieb points out that death is a process, not an event; in a sense, because death is inevitable, every second we’re alive we aren’t actually living but dying. She thinks we need to get more comfortable thinking about death but acknowledges that accepting its inevitability doesn’t make loss any less painful. It could, however, make us better prepared psychologically, and in that way, make it less scary.
The book explores how we define death and also asks a few probing questions:
There is some comfort in knowing that no one will ever be able to explain what being dead is like. While the unknown is fear-inducing, what if you found out what happens and it was disappointing? Or terrifying? Or wonderful? How would it change your life to know ahead of time?And it contemplates the afterlife, touching on various beliefs, both traditional and nontraditional. After we die, we live on in the memories of those who knew us, but those memories eventually die too: “Maybe we just become memories that leave the earth when each person who remembers us dies.”
Everything is Temporary is gentle and respectful--and thankfully free of triteness. It’s not about carpe diem and crossing items off a bucket list. It’s not religious, and it’s not about “moving past” grief. It’d be easy to string together a series of shallow clichéd statements, but those don’t help anyone. It’s also modern and with-it. The mention of eco-friendly mushroom death-suits is pleasantly surprising, as is acknowledgement that prolonging life can be detrimental to quality of life.
Gottlieb jumps from one thought to another in a style like stream-of-consciousness, so the thought sequences could stand to be tighter and more cohesive. But this book is about contemplation. She doesn’t dig deep down to the core; she shows readers where to dig. Even so, most readers of this book will probably never feel fully comfortable thinking about death, no matter how much they think on it--and such discomfort isn’t weird. Everything is Temporary is effective as a motivator, (hard) conversation-starter, and meditation on something inevitable.
Complementary reading: Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End
January 2, 2023
4.5⭐
✨ "There is some comfort in knowing that no one will ever be able to explain what being dead is like."
Wow... I don't think I've ever read a book quite like this. It offers such a unique perspective on death and how the way we view it affects the way we live. Why do we avoid talking about death? What happens after? "How would it feel to think of death not as a weight that will pull us out of life, but more as a support that will carry end towards rest?"
The author took a lot of care in discussing sensitive (and perhaps even taboo) topics, without neglecting the pain and difficulty of losing someone. I appreciate the segment about euthanasia. She also makes a lot of thought-provoking observations about humankind, modern society, traditions and cultures. The illustrations are sparse but so impactful and fitting.
A meaningful and reflective read that will leave you pondering long after you turn the last page. Perhaps even change the way we approach life.
Favourite takeaways:
🌸 Death is an process, not an event
🌸 We're all already in the process of dying
🌸 The significance of death awareness
🌸 Our refusal to talk about the inevitability of death
🌸 Is denying the reality of of our mortality
🌸 And ourselves the right to die with honor and care
🌸 We will infinitely spend more time dead than alive
🌸 Grief is neither linear nor universal
🌸 Our obsession with being remembered, creating an impact and equating legacy with the value of life... none of which will matter after we are gone.
✨ "We would never get to live if we didn't have to die.
✨ "There is some comfort in knowing that no one will ever be able to explain what being dead is like."
Wow... I don't think I've ever read a book quite like this. It offers such a unique perspective on death and how the way we view it affects the way we live. Why do we avoid talking about death? What happens after? "How would it feel to think of death not as a weight that will pull us out of life, but more as a support that will carry end towards rest?"
The author took a lot of care in discussing sensitive (and perhaps even taboo) topics, without neglecting the pain and difficulty of losing someone. I appreciate the segment about euthanasia. She also makes a lot of thought-provoking observations about humankind, modern society, traditions and cultures. The illustrations are sparse but so impactful and fitting.
A meaningful and reflective read that will leave you pondering long after you turn the last page. Perhaps even change the way we approach life.
Favourite takeaways:
🌸 Death is an process, not an event
🌸 We're all already in the process of dying
🌸 The significance of death awareness
🌸 Our refusal to talk about the inevitability of death
🌸 Is denying the reality of of our mortality
🌸 And ourselves the right to die with honor and care
🌸 We will infinitely spend more time dead than alive
🌸 Grief is neither linear nor universal
🌸 Our obsession with being remembered, creating an impact and equating legacy with the value of life... none of which will matter after we are gone.
✨ "We would never get to live if we didn't have to die.
January 8, 2023
This book has helped me immensely in thinking about death, dying and grieving. It is a beautifully illustrated book that can be read in less than an hour. Highly recommend to anyone!
November 5, 2022
cw: death & dying
"we would never get to live if we didnt have to die"
rounding this up to ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5. i love this sm 🥹 very often we would see books that bring death as a main topic. honestly i have seen more of those "how to live well" books but i truly believe that living well and leaving well are both as important as a topic and books centering death should be encouraged as equally!!
such a great book to start with in bringing the awareness to start thinking and talking about death, understanding how you feel and what you believe, and sharing your wishes with your loved ones. we will all eventually die someday yet its something that we dont talk about enough; its uncomfortable and upsetting but its necessary, especially to prepare emotionally for our deaths and others.
reading this really reminded me of all death matters by james tan too ((its a relatively short comic!! go n read if you havent!!!)) which also leads readers to ponder and engage in conversations & to break silence on death and dying.
also!!!! i really love the black & yellow illustrations in this omg the CONSISTENCY 💛🖤 would highly recommend if you love looking at a words + illustrations book or generally looking for a short yet thought-provoking read 💫
June 3, 2025
Good, yes, like.
November 10, 2022
To paraphrase the Beetlejuice musical again: God, I hope you’re ready for a book about DEATH!
Like You Died: An Anthology of the Afterlife this is an illustrated contemplation of mortality and the unknowable nature of the afterlife.
I might contest an assertion here or there, but I rather agree with the central concept of acknowledging death as an inevitability, reflecting on and grieving about that as part of living, while accepting that it will still be painful and scary to experience when it happens to others or comes for you.
My main quibble is that the book is a bit brief and shallow, tending toward pages that are more meme ready than worthy of deep contemplation. But it is still a useful prod down uncomfortable corridors of thought.
Like You Died: An Anthology of the Afterlife this is an illustrated contemplation of mortality and the unknowable nature of the afterlife.
I might contest an assertion here or there, but I rather agree with the central concept of acknowledging death as an inevitability, reflecting on and grieving about that as part of living, while accepting that it will still be painful and scary to experience when it happens to others or comes for you.
My main quibble is that the book is a bit brief and shallow, tending toward pages that are more meme ready than worthy of deep contemplation. But it is still a useful prod down uncomfortable corridors of thought.
Read
August 22, 2022Stumbled upon this in Shakespeare & Company in Paris and ended up reading it. Sometimes books have interesting timing in finding us.
January 20, 2026
"Sometimes we have to decide when something dies." Oh, how those words and images tore me down to emotional bedrock. I am glad that I read this and looked upon the artwork during this time of transition. There is a lot to takeaway. It is a subject that, I have a tough time admitting, brings me discomfort. Perhaps, it is something in which to be more considerate.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 8, 2023
Very fast read (only a sentence or two per page), and somewhat thought provoking. Nothing revolutionary but some things that made me pause and contemplate.
November 26, 2025
I needed this book.
December 23, 2023
"preparing yourself to no longer be is a lifelong process. preparing for ourselves and others to leave us is a process we can begin with each other to talk about what it means to die, what it means to live, how we affect each other, and what things we need to exist in a full life."
"we will spend infinitely more time dead than we ever spent alive. let's talk about our fears and sorrows, our anger and our anxieties."
"dying is not failing. death is sorrowful and horrible and loving and natural and normal. we get to be here for our lives. we are allowed to breathe and find joy and pain and love, and those things are the gift we are given with the knowledge that at the end of it, we will die."
we should talk about death more.
"we will spend infinitely more time dead than we ever spent alive. let's talk about our fears and sorrows, our anger and our anxieties."
"dying is not failing. death is sorrowful and horrible and loving and natural and normal. we get to be here for our lives. we are allowed to breathe and find joy and pain and love, and those things are the gift we are given with the knowledge that at the end of it, we will die."
we should talk about death more.
December 28, 2022
Fascinating inspection of how death shapes our lives more than we think or talk about.
"Death awareness has been a normal part of cultures and religions as a way to orient ourselves in our lives - the more mindful our relationship with dying, the deeper our relationship with life can be." (pg. 20)
"We cause more pain, more harm, and more personal and societal struggle by denying the reality of our mortality." (pg. 23)
"How would it feel to think of death not as a weight that will pull us out of life, but more as a support that will carry us towards rest?" (pg. 32)
"There is some comfort in knowing that no one will every be able to explain what being dead is like. While the unknown is fear-inducing, what if you found out what happens and it was disappointing? or terrifying? or wonderful? How would it change your life to know ahead of time?" (pg. 38-39)
"People are enamored with the idea that we are 'made of star stuff.' Isn't being made of earth stuff even more amazing? We are made of the same material as plants, oceans, insects, and the atmosphere. And yet, we are more drawn to the idea that we come from somewhere we have never been, from a time before we ever existed." (pg. 64-69)
"Would you want to never age or die? Or does the idea of living forever bring a little relief and gratitude that death will come?" (pg. 113)
"Spending time doing what we love gains meaning because the time we are dedicating to those things is limited. If we had unlimited time to spend with our friends, our families, our loves, or our animals, would the time spent feel special or important? If there was no scarcity, would we become bored by what once brought joy and purpose?" (pg. 159)
"We will spend infinitely more time dead than we ever spent alive." (pg. 169)
"Death awareness has been a normal part of cultures and religions as a way to orient ourselves in our lives - the more mindful our relationship with dying, the deeper our relationship with life can be." (pg. 20)
"We cause more pain, more harm, and more personal and societal struggle by denying the reality of our mortality." (pg. 23)
"How would it feel to think of death not as a weight that will pull us out of life, but more as a support that will carry us towards rest?" (pg. 32)
"There is some comfort in knowing that no one will every be able to explain what being dead is like. While the unknown is fear-inducing, what if you found out what happens and it was disappointing? or terrifying? or wonderful? How would it change your life to know ahead of time?" (pg. 38-39)
"People are enamored with the idea that we are 'made of star stuff.' Isn't being made of earth stuff even more amazing? We are made of the same material as plants, oceans, insects, and the atmosphere. And yet, we are more drawn to the idea that we come from somewhere we have never been, from a time before we ever existed." (pg. 64-69)
"Would you want to never age or die? Or does the idea of living forever bring a little relief and gratitude that death will come?" (pg. 113)
"Spending time doing what we love gains meaning because the time we are dedicating to those things is limited. If we had unlimited time to spend with our friends, our families, our loves, or our animals, would the time spent feel special or important? If there was no scarcity, would we become bored by what once brought joy and purpose?" (pg. 159)
"We will spend infinitely more time dead than we ever spent alive." (pg. 169)
October 14, 2024
If you are looking for a book that has a focus and direction, then this is not the book for you. Other reviewers state the book as concise, and would be incorrect as the book wanders along. As a certified End of Life Care Doula, I can say that this book seems designed to not only be given to those grieving exclusively. It’s a book of exactly what the title says.. “contemplations” on death that could have anyone stop to ponder. Some have value, some are vague and fail to land. Also surprised to see personal opinions mixed into the contemplations, that people of different faiths and life beliefs will not agree with. A book designed to aid understanding of death should not really have opinions.. but reflections to embrace everyone. Unfortunate choice there. The illustrations I would not say are beautiful. There are more like casual doodles of an illustrator that accompany the casual handwriting style font on the pages. The book has value, but its also meandering and opinionated. So, it’s a mixed bag. Maybe read it first before gifting it to someone grieving or facing their own mortality to see if it will have a positive effect. But maybe it will invite the dialogue about how someone may want to have legacy in their life for themselves and for their surviving family.
3.5 stars.
(Also.. a note to Goodreads: this is not a graphic novel or a self-help book. Classification as such in the genres area is incorrect)
3.5 stars.
(Also.. a note to Goodreads: this is not a graphic novel or a self-help book. Classification as such in the genres area is incorrect)
March 19, 2023
To be honest, I am really scared of dying. The concept of death and relinquishing your life to the unknown, possibly never to be conscious or born or experiencing life again ever, is terrifying to me. Although I know I am not alone in this fear, this beautifully illustrated book has helped me realise - even if I had already subconsciously known these words - that death is a natural process. Death can be a beautiful thing, returning back to the earth for future generations, just as how millions of humans have done before, even if thinking about it isn't easy. And by running away and denying the reality of our mortality, we only cause more pain to ourselves. Conversations about death are actually so important to help us come to terms with it and I should probably join one of those coffee-and-death chats.
Some of my favourite takeaways:
💫 While the unknown is fear-inducing, what if you found out what happens and it was disappointing?
💫 Death is a process, not an event.
💫 People are enamoured with the idea that we are "made of star stuff". Isn't being made of Earth stuff even more amazing?
💫 Maybe we have convinced ourselves that we are so separate from the natural world that to fully become indistinguishable from it in death would threaten our illusions of superiority.
💫 We equate legacy with the value of life, but when we're dead, we probably won't care if we're remembered or not.
💫 We can be drawn to the notion that the longevity of life is more important than the quality of it.
💫 Imagining the finiteness of your own life can illuminate the things that fill you with meaning or joy.
💫 Dying is not failing. Death is sorrowful / and horrible / and loving / and natural / and normal. We get to be here for our lives.
💫 We would never get to live / If we didn't have to die.
Some of my favourite takeaways:
💫 While the unknown is fear-inducing, what if you found out what happens and it was disappointing?
💫 Death is a process, not an event.
💫 People are enamoured with the idea that we are "made of star stuff". Isn't being made of Earth stuff even more amazing?
💫 Maybe we have convinced ourselves that we are so separate from the natural world that to fully become indistinguishable from it in death would threaten our illusions of superiority.
💫 We equate legacy with the value of life, but when we're dead, we probably won't care if we're remembered or not.
💫 We can be drawn to the notion that the longevity of life is more important than the quality of it.
💫 Imagining the finiteness of your own life can illuminate the things that fill you with meaning or joy.
💫 Dying is not failing. Death is sorrowful / and horrible / and loving / and natural / and normal. We get to be here for our lives.
💫 We would never get to live / If we didn't have to die.
August 22, 2023
cuma butuh waktu kira-kira satu jam buat ngelarin buku ini. singkat banget, penuh ilustrasi cantik, tapi maknanya tetep dalem. membahas soal kematian, sesuatu yang seringkali kita hindari (dan/atau takuti?) buat dibahas. karena ya nggak ada yang tau rasanya mati gimana, kalo udah mati ngapain.
lewat buku ini, kita diajak merenungi kematian. bahwa kematian itu ya sesuatu yang wajar, sebuah proses yang kita alami tiap hari, bahkan. bahwa kematian (dan ditinggalkan orang tersayang karena kematian) adalah hal yang pasti, dan akan, dilalui oleh semua makhluk hidup yang bernyawa di muka bumi. bahwa semuanya ya hanya sementara, dan sebaiknya kita memanfaatkan waktu yang kita punya ini dengan sebaik-baiknya.
penulis juga nggak mengesampingkan fakta bahwa ada beberapa kematian yang kejam: dirampas hak hidupnya, karena bencana alam, dan sebagainya meskipun hanya sepintas. memang, kematian yang mendadak bisa benar-benar mengacaukan kita, tapi bukan berarti kematian harus ditakuti dan dihindari
lewat buku ini, kita diajak merenungi kematian. bahwa kematian itu ya sesuatu yang wajar, sebuah proses yang kita alami tiap hari, bahkan. bahwa kematian (dan ditinggalkan orang tersayang karena kematian) adalah hal yang pasti, dan akan, dilalui oleh semua makhluk hidup yang bernyawa di muka bumi. bahwa semuanya ya hanya sementara, dan sebaiknya kita memanfaatkan waktu yang kita punya ini dengan sebaik-baiknya.
penulis juga nggak mengesampingkan fakta bahwa ada beberapa kematian yang kejam: dirampas hak hidupnya, karena bencana alam, dan sebagainya meskipun hanya sepintas. memang, kematian yang mendadak bisa benar-benar mengacaukan kita, tapi bukan berarti kematian harus ditakuti dan dihindari
March 1, 2023
This book is filled with lovely illustrations and poignant contemplations concerning death and being mortal. I loved this book, though I might be biased based on my interest in Thanatology and desire to become a Death/End-of-Life Doula. I definitely went through this book as slowly as I could, trying to take in all the contemplations, but I think I'm going to have to go over it all again with sticky tab notes to mark the ones I loved the most. This'll be a book I go back to regularly and I think it'll be very helpful for my future death care career! Highly recommend reading it, especially if you are feeling ready to think about big, existential life/death concepts.
Content warnings: death (as evident from the title), but specifically also personal death, death of a pet, death rituals involving animal predation, mention of cannibalism
Content warnings: death (as evident from the title), but specifically also personal death, death of a pet, death rituals involving animal predation, mention of cannibalism
November 18, 2024
My favorite quote is on the very last page. "We would never get to live if we didn't have to die."
This wasn't a long read. Most pages aren't more than a few sentences. It got to the point and shared so.e interesting ways to look at death. I bought it with the thought that it would maybe help my grief journey. It did, and it didn't. It did by offering insight and understanding. It offered new ways to view death and to help reframe how we think of it. It didn't help in the way that it was just ideas and thoughts about death as a process. This isn't a self-help book. Overall, I feel it would be a good read for many different age groups. Younger adults/teens/older children may find this helpful with semi-large losses. Use carefully.
This wasn't a long read. Most pages aren't more than a few sentences. It got to the point and shared so.e interesting ways to look at death. I bought it with the thought that it would maybe help my grief journey. It did, and it didn't. It did by offering insight and understanding. It offered new ways to view death and to help reframe how we think of it. It didn't help in the way that it was just ideas and thoughts about death as a process. This isn't a self-help book. Overall, I feel it would be a good read for many different age groups. Younger adults/teens/older children may find this helpful with semi-large losses. Use carefully.
October 18, 2022
This slim book of illustrated musings on the significance of life, the nearness of death, and the relativity of our presence in space and time is just magnificent. I started tearing up about 2 pages in and decided I needed to wait until I was in the right mindset to read all the way through. I imagine I will turn to it time and again when I am in a contemplative or griefy state. This book was gifted to our palliative care team by last year's fellows and I'm so grateful that they brought these words into my life.
December 29, 2022
Me pareció un libro lindo, pero no tiene una línea fuerte de pensamiento sino que más bien es un libro de viñetas y pensamientos separados respecto a la muerte (algunos siendo más largos que otros). Creo que no es para mí porque lo sentí muy superficial, pero para alguien que apenas se adentra a visitar la muerte me parece una buena lectura. No fue apaciguante para mí, pero creo que sí podría serlo para otras personas.
April 4, 2023
This illustrated book on our impermanence is light and heavy at the same time. The whimsical illustrations worked well with the heavy topic and it's a quick read. Anyone could read this and feel better about life and death. I also loved the opportunity to support a queer artist and writer who has an interest in death education.
November 4, 2024
This just got added to my list of books that should be required reading for the entire human race, right alongside "Braiding Sweetgrass," and "The Body Keeps the Score".
I'm about to go share it with everyone I love, in an effort to share Gottlieb's advice to embrace each day fully because we are all dying.
I'm about to go share it with everyone I love, in an effort to share Gottlieb's advice to embrace each day fully because we are all dying.
December 17, 2022
What a delightful way of presenting thoughts and concepts on this very personal topic. I recognized quite a few different perspectives; the author has done a marvelous job of merging the paths and illustrating this journey.
February 10, 2023
“We would never get to live if we didn’t have to die.” 🥹 a really beautiful book about death and dying with lovely illustrations that prompts everyone who reads to consider their own death, and in considering that, how would you like to live?
October 30, 2023
Such a beautiful book with reassuring explanation. Tapi kayaknya aku bakal ngerasa lebih imersif ke isinya kalo aku lagi di masa berduka. Untuk saat ini, mungkin lebih ke memperkaya pengetahuan aja kali ya. Hopefully this book can be read at the right time.
January 27, 2024
An illustrated essay about life and death. To get a little perspective on finite consciousness on earth and the process of walking through beyond time. Love the doodle and three main colors that used to metaphor the writing.
August 30, 2022
Cried my way through this beautiful and simple illustrated book of Iris’ musings on death. It’s wonderful and had a big impact on me.
September 14, 2022
Recommended by Mandy Patinkin and Kathryn Grody (two of my favorite people in the world!). A wonderfully contemplative book with fantastic illustration.
September 15, 2022
What a beautiful, wise little book.
October 2, 2022
This is a very good little book about death. Each page is very thought provoking and gives helpful perspective. Read this in a sitting at the bookstore
October 4, 2022
It was a good book. It reminded me of Eating the Sun: Small Musings on a Vast Universe by Ella Frances Sanders:’)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 54 reviews