Loving People Who Are Hard to Love: Transforming Your World by Learning to Love Unconditionally

by Joyce Meyer

Renowned Bible teacher and #1 New York Times bestselling author Joyce Meyer teaches readers to love the people in their life who are hard to love.

We’re never going to be able to prevent people from saying or doing things that hurt our feelings. We will always have opportunities to get offended. But if we do things God’s way, we can choose to save ourselves a lot of misery and hardship. This doesn’t mean we allow people to abuse us. No, there is a time for confronting people and dealing with situations. However, the Bible commands us to love our enemies and forgive those who have wronged us, even when it feels impossible.

Everything the Lord asks us to do in the Bible is ultimately for our good. In fact, when we choose to love our enemies and forgive those who have hurt us, we are actually helping ourselves more than anyone else. Because whatever the Lord commands us to do, He is going to give us the power of the Holy Spirit to accomplish it—and that includes loving and being good to difficult people! God’s love flowing through us is strong enough to melt even the hardest hearts, so use kindness as a weapon to overcome the meanness in people.

Genres: Christian, Self Help, Nonfiction, Spirituality, Christian Living, Audiobook, Religion

Audiobook

Published September 13, 2022

About the author

Joyce Meyer is one of the world's leading practical Bible teachers. A New York Times bestselling author, Joyce’s books have helped millions of people find hope and restoration through Jesus Christ. Through Joyce Meyer Ministries, Joyce teaches on a number of topics with a particular focus on how the Word of God applies to our everyday lives. Her candid communication style allows her to share openly and practically about her experiences so others can apply what she has learned to their lives.

Joyce’s programs, Enjoying Everyday Life and Everyday Answers with Joyce Meyer, can be seen around the world through television, radio, and the Internet. Joyce has authored more than 100 books, which have been translated into more than 100 languages and over 65 million of her books have been distributed worldwide. She teaches in cities across America as well as internationally. Joyce Meyer Ministries has offices in nine countries.

Joyce’s passion to help hurting people is foundational to the vision of Hand of Hope, the missions arm of Joyce Meyer Ministries. Hand of Hope provides worldwide humanitarian outreaches such as feeding programs, medical care, orphanages, disaster response, human trafficking intervention and rehabilitation, and much more – always sharing the love and Gospel of Christ.

Her latest book, LIVING A LIFE YOU LOVE, releases Spring 2018.

Hachette Book Group has sold over 30 million copies of Joyce Meyer's books.

Reviews

[Janet · Rating 2 out of 5]

I did not feel like this book really did much explaining how to love people who are hard to love. There was a lot of stuff that I didn't care for such as insinuating if we don't do good deeds we won't go to heaven (Biblically incorrect) and lots of predictions about how we are in the end times (irrelevant to the point of the book). There was a lot of discussion about sin and WHY it is hard to love people, but the actual part of the book devoted to HOW to love difficult people is very limited. Basically, be nice and pray and love them even when they are mean and nasty. I think most people already know that is what we are supposed to do. I was hoping for more concrete examples than what was provided.

[Cover Lover Book Review · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loving People Who Are Hard to Love is a powerful title. I’m sure all of us know at least one person (and likely more) that is difficult to love. We are all wounded and have issues of some sort or another, but we all have different ways of reacting, healing, and treating others.

I’ve enjoyed so many of Joyce Meyer’s books, and although this one offers loads of wisdom and reveals why it’s hard to love some people, I didn’t really learn anything new. Still, it’s great to be reminded to try our best to be nice to those who aren’t that nice to us. And praying about it certainly gives us the power to do so.

Disclosure: #CoverLoverBookReview received a complimentary copy of this book.

[Joan · Rating 4 out of 5]

The world seems to have more anger, hatred and violence than ever before. Christians can make a difference in the world and that includes learning how to love people we think hard to love.

I like Meyer's honest and thought provoking book. We can learn how to love and Meyer gives us plenty of examples and instruction on how to do so. She admits it is no easy task. We have to be willing to see our own faults and recognize that we are undoubtedly hard to love at times. She encourages us to make love a priority.

Some thought provoking highlights from the book include being reminded that Jesus considers how we treat others as how we treat Him. We don't have to feel like loving others. We love others out of obedience to Jesus. We have to want to please God more than we want to please ourselves. We need to trust God, that He will provide for us when we love the hard to love. Those are just a few of the great teachings in this book. There are insights on the reasons why people behave so that they are hard to love. There is help to not take offense so quickly. There is encouragement to show mercy to others just as we have received mercy from God.

Meyer is quick to admit that she is still learning how to love those hard to love. Yet she knows that Christians are to be an example to the world. Reading this book will help you receive the practical instruction and strong encouragement you need to get you on your way on the journey of loving those hard to love.

I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an honest and independent review.

[Anya potgieter · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was packed with so much spiritual wisdom and guidance. I adore Joyce Meyer’s book and she has been a huge influence with my relationship with Jesus. My favorite thing about this book was the heavy emphasis she put on loving people and becoming peacemakers in society.

There is so much information packed into this book that I’ll be sure to re-read it again, as I may soon forget and to ensure the messages she conveyed in Loving People Who Are Hard To Love stick with me throughout my spiritual walk with Jesus.

I will 100% recommend this to anyone who wants to build a more intimate relationship with Jesus

[Liz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lots of good stuff in here, though, like many Biblical self-help books, I really think it could have been condensed. This one even repeated a few anecdotes with such similar phrasing that I had to check to see if I'd accidentally restarted the audiobook.

Meyer also veers a little too close to works based salvation heresy and spends a lot of time talking about the "rewards" we are "promised" to receive for obedience, all the while failing to specify that these rewards are only guaranteed in heaven, and most certainly not guaranteed on Earth.

All the same, I appreciated that this book pulled a bit of an Uno reverse on the reader. Many, like me, are probably looking for practical ways to deal with some frustrating people in their lives. Meyer reminds us that real love is not easy and starts with genuine love for God and obedience to him in everything. She also goes into some of the potential causes for a frustrating person's behavior, having been difficult at one time herself. I walked away from this book feeling both humbled and hopeful.

[Christine · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was one that I definitely highlighted throughout. This book is more about what we do in the time when people are hard to love. She does say that this is not about those that are abusive. This is about other people in your daily life. She uses Scriptures and her daily life to discuss ways to love difficult people. I have read many of her books, but if you have not, she discusses her marriage and childhood. You will very much get to know her. This book is for anyone that is struggling with others in their life. Check out/buy the book at the end of September.

[Liberty {LittyLibby} · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ouch. It's me. I'M the one that's hard for me to love.

[Wendy Liu · Rating 2 out of 5]

there is some decent semi-practical advice if you're able to skip past the filler ("webster's dictionary defines"-type stuff) and the extreme fidelity to biblical guidelines (why premarital sex is wrong, etc). the advice boils down to: accept people as they are and forgive them even if you don't want to. not realistic for every scenario obviously but not bad as a starting point.

that's basically it, saved you a read.

[Ashley Buchweitz · Rating 4 out of 5]

A solid book based heavily in scripture and generally engaging. Lots of thinking points. Not very personal and gets a bit political for my liking but overall solid.

[Rachel Nicole Wagner · Rating 5 out of 5]

This books really does help you take an introspective look into how we love and treat others. Very good self-development book on loving others like Jesus loved ♥️

~xoxo,
Rach

[Victoria Kahm davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book gives great insights into loving people and creating peace in one’s own life. It turned obedience into something that seems more doable than Ever imagined before.

[Cortney Bitsoi]

Another favorite read from this year!

[Andrew · Rating 5 out of 5]

In Loving People Who Are Hard to Love, Joyce Meyer has written a brand-new book covering the topic of love and she guides readers on how we can learn to love others who are just plain difficult to. A major scripture verse discussed in this book was John 13:34, that stated that we must love one another like He has loved us. The world is facing a crisis of a lack of love and it’s filled with hatred, violence, we have no peace, no love, and angry is more present more now than ever before. She explained how love provides us with purpose and meaning. Jesus also revealed the important of truly providing for others out of love whether it be giving clothes, food, or water to someone in need, caring for the sick, or someone who is in prison. He compared to how if we did an act of kindness to someone else, then it was like we did it for Christ. Joyce used this teaching to remind believers that the choices we make now will determine if we will be in the righteous side when Jesus returns. She encouraged believers to practice loving others daily and we can use the five love languages to do so.


One of my favorite stories she shared was about her experience with a shopping cart filled with dented cans. There was a time that she didn’t have a lot of money and had to cut costs. One grocery store had this special cart filled with dented cans or missing labels. You wouldn’t have any idea what items you would be getting until you opened the can. It could be dog/ cat food, vegetables, fruit, applesauce. She admitted to how she would choose the cans with the smallest dents and she used this exampled to display how the take the same approach with regard to dealing and choosing people we associate with. We don’t always know what we will be getting and we can’t always read people’s labels. She explained how her husband probably didn’t realize that she had a small dent in her childhood.


She shared how she suffered sexual abuse from her father and she didn’t obtain an apology until he was 80 years old. Her mother didn’t apologize until 30 years after she turned 18. Her abuse affected her personality and she was very controlling and afraid. She dealt with a deep issue of rejection and shame. She had a big anger problem and it surfaced in her marriage to Dave. Her husband had a strong faith and he remained peaceful and loving towards her and eventually she found healing and got closer to Jesus. Another powerful lesson was about porcupines and how they have to close to either being cold in the winter or being stuck by another porcupine quills in order to survive winter. She used to this to illustrate to us on how we may all have wounds that run deep but we are still much better off connecting with others and choosing to love.


I would recommend this life changing book to anyone who is struggling with loving others who are difficult. We all have that boss, coworkers, church members, family, and neighbors that are hard to love. This book contained numerous information and strategies to assist us in loving others. This book would be best to reread and to actively read a chapter a day or week and put it into practice. One of the most insightful teachings in the book is the one about offense and how to deal with it directly head on. We can instead choose to follow peace and to not be easily offended. This is one tactic satan uses a lot to keep people bound and in turmoil against each other. This is more than likely the very reason in the back of the book, she enclosed scriptures to assist readers in dealing with offenses and finding true freedom.



"I received this book free from the publisher, Hachette Book Group/Faithwords for my honest review.”

[Becky · Rating 5 out of 5]

PLEASE READ THIS REVIEW ON MY BLOG: https://bookreadingtic.com/2023/03/24... THANK YOU!

Doing the Impossible!

Once again, the obnoxious person in your life has purposely done something to upset you. This author claims there is a way to deal with people like that, but following her suggestions may be hard.

People who are difficult can ruin your day, but only if you let them. You have the choice to dwell on something, or let it go.

According to the author:

"...Forgiveness is not a feeling. It is a decision we make about how we will treat the people who have hurt us."

You don't have to feel love to show love. Joyce paid a lot of money for the very best care available for her abusive father, along with the mother who abandoned her. Even though the two of them spent years hurting her, Joyce made the decision to help them at the end of their lives.

Prickly people are usually that way because they reflect back to you their image of themselves. Hurt people, hurt people.

Here are some things to do that may help:

Look for the good in people, everyone has something. Enjoy the good, and pray that the bad part gets better.

When you are interacting with someone who is hard, try thinking about overlooking things for God's sake. God wants you to return good for evil.

Try to find out what they like. Sometimes talking about that subject can make them easier to be around.

Practice being loving, even if they are horrible, and it will get easier to do so when dealing with the person.

Have patience, it may take a long time to get a break through with a difficult person, it may never happen. But you will be blessed for trying.

It is hard to show love to someone who never seems to appreciate it. But we are not responsible for how others act, however, we are responsible for our actions, and that will bring us happiness.

The bottom line: if you don't forgive someone, you will only hurt yourself.

I recommend this five-star book to anyone who has ever had conflict in their life.

Thank you, Faith Words Books, for providing Tickmenot with a book to review. Opinions are my own.

[Rena McGrath · Rating 5 out of 5]

Joyce Meyer has written another wonderful book about we can learn and go about loving people who have hurt you, been cruel to you, betrayed you or even have gone out of their way make your life miserable. Joyce explains that we are not only doing it for them but to please and obey God and also for ourselves so we do not let all those negative feelings for people who are cruel to us to end up stealing our joy and peace in our lives.
One of the things we can do is pray for them, if possible help them if they need help and forgive them with our whole heart and even love, not necessarily feeling love but loving them as fellow human beings who might have problems of their own. God who created us in His image wants us to remember that He sent His only begotten Son to live among us teach us God's ways and then die on the cross for all of us to be saved from all sins and give us the way of life we should live when He was resurrected and rose from the grave to sit at the right hand of the God, the Father. Before Christ left the earth for the last time He sent us the Holy Spirit to live in every one of us as our comforter, guide and strength for the rest of our lives. To become spiritually mature, we must not only forgive the difficult people around us but spiritually we should learn to love them.It is a long and sometimes difficult process but it brings us closer to Christ and the way He who had no sin, came down and removed all our sins. Thanks to Joyce Meyer, Hachette Book Group and Net Galley for giving me the opportunity of reading this spiritually uplifting book.

[Marian · Rating 3 out of 5]

Joyce Meyer has written over 100 books and is one of the most influential Evangelical Christians of our time in addition to being someone who has a passion for helping hurting people. She references, often, in this book that part of her drive to teach others about the power of forgiveness has to do with the abuse she endured from her father and she has insight into the difficult nature of forgiving because of the lived experience of being abused and abandoned by both of her parents. I like Joyce Meyer's humour and authenticity and was drawn to this title because it made me laugh and I hoped she'd also help me in navigating my own struggle with doing what God asks us to do in loving others. This is particularly hard with the amount of rhetoric about the pandemic, how people ought to live with everyone's loud and differing opinions, and how we don't seem to agree on matters of social justice and how to live out what Jesus would want and do. I've only given this book three stars as I felt like the ideas weren't as helpful as I'd hoped and the practical suggestions did not arrive until the very end. Nevertheless, reading it helped me realize that rather than a focus on others, the work needs to continue in me as I decide to do what is right, work to forgive others, and attempt to be more of a light rather than contribute to the darkness that is all around us.

[Mel]

Loving someone can be very challenging at times. Most of us have had the experience of loving a difficult person. Joyce Meyer makes this topic the focus of this book.

Joyce Meyer delivers a very thorough discussion on loving a difficult person and learning to love others unconditionally. She explains what love really is, and how important love is in relationships. Joyce also explores the function of love in relationships and how to adjust and become adaptable in relationships. The other topics that she writes about are: anger, avoiding strife, and the subject of offense.

One takeaway from this book that I noted is on the Scripture verse Philippians 4:6-7, where Joyce talks about how worry had stolen her peace and how this Scripture reminded her about keeping faith in God and to remain peaceful. I found this to be such a great reminder about how there are so many things we can experience that steals our joy and how we should keep God's Word close, to retain that peace within us.

I recommend picking up this book because I think it will help you navigate those challenging relationships in your life. I also think that there are so many great reminders in this book on how to lean on God in the midst of the challenges and remain joy and peaceful in the Father.

Happy Reading!

[James Daniels · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very encouraging and uplifting read, I recommend that everyone read this book. Just as the title says, "Loving People Who Are Hard to Love." We all have people in our lives that are hard to love. At times we ourselves are hard to love and don't realize it. We are commanded by God to love our enemies, to forgive people and not harbor unforgiveness. We are not to seek revenge even if someone hurts us and control our anger. We are to love people still because God loves us. God so the loved the word, that he gave His only begotten Son. He sent His son here to save us from ourselves. This book is filled with tons of sound counsel and scripture on love and peace; on how to love people who are hard to love. I took my time reading this book, because I wanted to reference all the scriptures of the bible as I went along, I learned a lot about myself, people, and behavior. There is a lot of wisdom in this book to go along with scripture and real life testimonies that will help anyone who is serious about their walk with God. You will thank God once you've finished reading this book. It is a blessing. I thank God for this blessing and for using Joyce Meyer to be a blessing to others.

[Autumn Pisarsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very hard to read at the beginning but in a good way. I’ve been struggling with forgiving someone in my life and this book was recommended to me. The tips she gives on how to love people who are hard to love are very simple but worthwhile.

I realized partway through that I was confusing forgiveness and reconciliation, which was a helpful distinction. I’d recommend taking this book alongside with you as you are struggling with loving someone who is hard to love, because a lot of her points made perfect sense to me as someone who’s been struggling with this for years.

Finally, while I really appreciated this book, I found a few points that I disagreed with how the scripture was used, which is my primary complaint. That could be because of the tradition I’m from, the fact that the meaning of these verses are contended or several other factors. Her points were still scripture based and it didn’t detract from the argument, so not a big deal, just make sure you read with your brain engaged.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loving People Who Are Hard To Love is a Christian living book by author Joyce Meyer.

Loving People Who Are Hard To Love is organized into 4 parts. Part One: Love Changes Everything. Part Two: Love and Peace in Relationships. Part Three: The Power of Love and Acceptance. Part Four: God’s Love Triumphs Over All. There is also a section with Scriptures to help you forgive and find freedom from offense.

I always find a Joyce Meyer book to be relevant for our day and she didn’t let me down with her new book. I give Loving People Who Are Hard To Love 4*/5*.

Disclaimer: I receive complimentary books from various sources, including, publishers, publicists, authors, and/or NetGalley. I am not required to write a positive review and have not received any compensation. The opinions shared here are my own entirely. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255

[Altary · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Loving People Who Are Hard to Love" by Joyce Meyer is a powerful and thought-provoking book that offers practical guidance and biblical wisdom on how to love those who are difficult to love. Through personal anecdotes and biblical references, Meyer encourages readers to look beyond the surface and see the value and worth in all people, regardless of how they may treat us. She also provides practical strategies for how to respond to difficult people in a way that is both loving and respectful. Overall, this book is a must-read for anyone looking to improve their relationships with difficult people in their lives. It is a very helpful, easy to read and very encouraging book that helps to change your perspective about difficult people and help to be more loving and compassionate towards them.

[Nikki Book Reviewer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Current Read:
Loving People Who Are Hard To Love by Joyce Meyer

Fave Quote
“I shall pass through life but once. Let me show kindness now, as I shall not pass this way again.”-William Penn

About:
Y’all this book is soooo good! Don’t be fooled by the title! This isn’t a book on strategies to deal with difficult people. This book serves as a mirror that causes you to be self-reflective and introspective about the quality of your personal and professional relationships. You’re 19 chapters away from the best personal/professional relationships you’ve ever had! Guaranteed to change your life for the better! It’s an easy and quick read. Highly recommend, 10/10!

P.S. Joyce Meyer shoots straight-no chaser! You will probably say, “ouch” a few times while reading this! Just FYI if you’re not familiar with her style.

Happy Reading

[Kristine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gems (not all hers, some from others that she just quotes

We have to love people as they are, not how we want them to be

Forgiveness is not a feeling, it’s a decision about how we are going to treat people who have hurt us

Enjoy what you have while you wait for what you want

Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears

Love is giving people what they need, not what we need

If you do not have peace with yourself you can’t have peace with anyone else

Think power thoughts

Look for positive aspects of people

Peace stealers - rushing, worry, hunger, fatigue, loneliness

Anything we run from continues to chase us

The weak cannot forgive,

Think kind and loving thoughts about people

[Hillary Baden · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a very convicting reminder of Christ’s call to love ALL people even when they aren’t easy to love! I appreciated Joyce’s practical advice from personal experience and steps on how to live a life that reflects love for others. Her reminder that love is about how we treat someone, not just how we feel about someone was also convicting.
I also appreciated her emphasis on the importance of prayer as well as the reminder that Christ never asks us to do something that is impossible and will empower us to do difficult things.
I would highly recommend this book to any believer that desires to grow in their ability to love as Jesus loves!
*I received a free digital copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for my honest review

[Susan Shipe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Know any people who are hard to love? Of course! We all do! Joyce makes perfect sense when she answers this dilemma with simply, "Love Them Anyway!"
But how exactly does one do this? It takes a lot of prayer, God's help, and practical wisdom.
And, always remember, love is so much more than a 'feeling', it is being kind and treating people the way we want to be treated. With kindness, patience, and understanding. This book is chock full of wisdom and suggestions.
When we get this - it will result in peaceful living. We won't second-guess how we left someone.
I fully recommend this read for anyone with difficult people in their families and circles.

[Natasha S · Rating 2 out of 5]

So I bought this book because the cover and back of the book summary gave a different impression. I did not know this book was highly religious personally I’m not a huge believer. I’m still figuring myself out as a young person and this book definitely wasn’t what I thought it would be. I started reading it and every page has a bible verse etc the cover says loving peinen who are hard to love I can say this book covers this slightly but it focused a lot on religion. I did not finish this book after getting through half of it I did not wish to continue.

This is my opinion I do not mean to offend anyone

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very Much Needed for Our World

What a much needed resource to meditate on. We are made up of so much more than flesh and blood and we are fighting a very real and constant battle against evil. The spiritual warfare that we are experiencing requires us to mediate on truths that will empower us to do good and to love no matter the circumstances. This book is loaded with practical steps and spiritual truths that will aid readers in their pursuit to love themselves, their families, their communities and the rest of the world the way Jesus does. You wont be disappointed reading this book and may find yourselves re-reading to refresh yourselves in these biblical truths.

[Shelley Marushak Langelaar · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the things that I appreciate about Joyce Meyer’s writing is the fact that she shares from her heart and provides personal examples from her own life and experiences. I was able to glean some practical advice on how to love the people in my life that are somewhat difficult to love. I appreciate the encouragement that this book provided and the way scripture was explained. I would recommend to others.

I received an advanced copy of this book via NetGalley and voluntarily reviewed it. All thoughts and comments are my honest opinion.

[Juliana · Rating 5 out of 5]

excellent book

This book came to me at the right time. It’s definitely what I needed to hear with everything going on in my life and also the world today. I bought the study guide as well and let me tell you it definitely helped me heal wounds,current and old ones. It reminded me to look at things from Jesus perspective. Also it remind me that not everyone of the world will choose to look at things from a love perspective they go straight to judging which leads to holding grudges and resentment.

[Aldo Santoso · Rating 5 out of 5]

Acceptance is the best gift that we can give to people (who are hard to love).

In order to love people, we must learn to accept them as they are, not try to make them the way we wish they were.

Trying to change other people is an act of selfishness, not love.

People who are hard to love are starving for love. They need to be listened, to be taken care of.

At the end, realize that most of us are also hard to be loved in some way. Remember that God is so patient with us, He loved us when we were hard to love.