Paper Girl and the Knives that Made Her

by Ari B. Cofer

We've all been paper before. We've all been fragile. Leaflike and gently blowing, enough to create stories or build fires. We go through life like that. We come across things that tear us into pieces, and we keep going. We keep fighting, because we must. We look for ways to be whole. To be the person we dream ourselves to be. Fragile by nature but tough by circumstance, paper girls are shaped by their love and loss. This collection of poetry and prose describes the journey of learning to live fully through the messiness of life and tenuousness of mental health.

Genres: Poetry, Mental Health, Nonfiction, Adult

170 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 4, 2022

Reviews

[Darya Silman · Rating 4 out of 5]

'Paper Girl and the Knives that Made Her' will cut through a reader's heart and kindly heal the wounds it left.

Till page 24, the poems by Ari B. Cofer represent nothing of an extraordinary and don't possess outstanding quality, exploring the heartbreak in a sweet, heart-touching manner. After page 24, the author, it seems, talks about every riveting topic female poets can openly write about: sexual assault, rape, suicide, and depression. The journey is intended both for the readers and the author herself: her self-discovery tries the boundaries within which she can stay away from self-harm, mental and physical.

The writing style is lucid yet highly creative. The poem 'my sister turns 20 this month' (the lack of capitalization is the text's characteristic feature) uses a countdown from 20 to 1 as a core of talking about the author's depression and self-harm. The book also contains several haikus, and some poems were inspired by the oeuvre of other contemporary poets.

I don't question the author's harsh reality of the everyday struggle to survive another day, something ordinary people take for granted. However, I can't forget one review that pointed out to the little note at the beginning of the book: 'Some of these pieces are based on true stories, and some may be changed to fit a different theme.' The unclear demarcation line between what is true and what is changed leaves a tiny seed of doubt in the author's sincerity.

Or maybe I got hardened by the pain that now, above all times, gained the strong voice. The books like 'Paper Girl an the Knives that Made Her' even developed their structural peculiarities and necessities: they have to include a chapter about healing/moving forward to not be considered too depressing. If an author is still in a dark place, his/her pain should be hidden under the rug until he/she can give something positive to the world.

I recommend the book to lovers of poetry, especially those who seek words to express their demons yet can't find them. Understandable language, authenticity, and creative ways of using poetic forms are the book's strong sides.

I received the advanced review copy, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Chloe Ritchie]

'i hold my breath
because i'm afraid of losing what's left of you
in an exhale'

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful

I would happily buy this book with a smile on my face, and then begin to cry because the words and their phrases made my crushed heart melt

Rated: 4 stars

Thank you to netgallery for allowing me to read this beautifully arranged poetry in exchange for an honest review

[Violeta · Rating 4 out of 5]

Digital ARC provided by Netgalley

The book deals with highly sensitive themes and the emotions it triggers can be very profound for the persons relating with those situations. It felt a very personal collection, like reading the diary of a person or assisting to a therapy session of a person in distress in the beginning.
Even if the book is very short, I could not finish it in one go since the emotions it deals with and the emotional load of each poem makes you stop and ponder on what you have just read.

[huna · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.3/5

Special thanks to NetGalley for providing the e-ARC in exchange for honest review.

This poetry collection by Ari B. Cofer is so raw, dark and gloomy. It touches on a lot of important topics; depression, suicide, self-harm, rape, sexual assault, racism and I really appreciate that the author stated the trigger warnings inside the book, so readers know what to expect. I was intrigued by the cover and the description of this book which led me to request for the ARC. The book turns out to make me feel lots of things from sad to happy, from scared to relieve. The writing is raw yet so beautiful and I believe those who read this would definitely understand what the author spoke about. There are so many things in this world that we often overlook or ignore, such as sexual assault and rape, and how it affects the victims' lives. The trauma is clear, the cut in the heart, bleeding, the feeling of being stranger in your own body, just by reading the poems on this issue already make me feel so painful and heartbroken, and I feel really angry towards those despicable people who did the act. I am grateful that the author also wrote encouraging words to those who are fighting to stay alive, and those who have been hurt in the same way she was. We all need it somehow and I can relate so much when it comes to the parts where the author said, maybe all we want is to feel like we can exist in this world. That just hits me so hard.

Overall, I definitely love this collection of poems. It is not suitable for all, since the poems/issues can be triggering to some, but it has definitely open my eyes to the world and the bitter truth.

[Emma Ann]

A raw and honest poetry collection that explores trauma, suicide/suicidal ideation, depression, and finally recovery. The collection also isn’t afraid to examine other tough topics like racism, body dysmorphia, and violence against people of color.

[Alicia Cook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ari B. Cofer's 'paper girl and the knives that made her' doesn't play out in a romanticized 'mirror, mirror on the wall' way, but in a cloudy-mirror way, complete with toothpaste splatter and raw honesty. At a time when everyone is traumatized on some level, this book beautifully depicts a young person's mental health journey.

(Got an early ARC.)

[sintiareads · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'd like to thank NetGalley and Central Avenue Publishing for providing me a free ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This collection really left me speechless. I think it's a brave thing to write about your own trauma and mental illness. Depression and suicide are some really difficult topics people usually try to avoid. I'm really grateful for authors and poets who write about these two because they represent a voice for those who are still unable to speak about it. This collection was beautifully written and I could connect to most of the poems. Ari B. Cofer did an amazing job writing about all these feelings and how you can live with them. At the end, a great reminder is that you should never give up, you never know which great things you might do.

[Victoria · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was raw. This was real. This was hard and heartbreaking and scary and sad. This was human. It felt like each poem was crafted with care, as if a little piece of the author was imbedded into every period, every blank space. I haven't had the best luck with poetry collections as of late, but from the preface I was immediately drawn in.

Some of my favourite poems were:
- my chest is full
- picasso
- home
- i saw their wedding photos on facebook
- magic
- my sister turns 20 this month
- her name is depression
- too black
- when our skin is too much
- when you left
- permanent
- bridges
- paper girl and the knives that made her

* Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

[BAM · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so beautiful. I’ve followed Ari on Instagram since before their page reached 5k, and I have to say that she has always been incredible, but she has certainly grown as an author. Her words are real and raw, and I couldn’t have been happier to be able to read this collection before it hits the shelves! I even pre-ordered a copy for my personal collection!

The collection starts simple with some relatable pieces about heartbreak. It moves into some more serious topics like racism, sexual assault, mental illness, but it also touches on a subject not many do: the “after” timeline of rape. The processing of it. The gray area that not many have the courage to speak on.

I definitely loved this collection of poems. It is not suitable for all, since the poems/issues can be hard for many to read, but it will open your eyes to the one truth: the world is cold and bitter, but it is also beautiful.

[ThatBeMeDiana · Rating 5 out of 5]

NEW POETRY BOOK ON THE HORIZON COMING OUT JANUARY 4TH, 2022 FOR FANS OF RUPI KAUR AND AMANDA LOVELACE.

First, I would like to say I appreciated the trigger warnings at the beginning of the book. I believe that is so meaningful these days and such a small thing that can be overlooked.

Secondly, this book took my breath away. I was in shock at how moved I was. The poems start off simple - about heartbreak - yet were very relatable. And as you got used to the way the writer talks, start to trust her journey, she dives into deeper topics: racism, sexual assault, mental illness. The little doodles here and there were cute for a nice breather in between deep poems.

There is so much stigma about being a rape survivor and nobody ever talks about what happens next. This book talks about that gray area. Processing. Trying to live. Getting lost in your head. The confusion. The guilt. How you feel when you see your attacker on social media - the surreal moment of seeing them get in a new relationship. How easy it is for young people to be taken advantaged of. This book was raw of emotion and I truly felt like a piece of the author's soul was in this book. This book really stands out and I cannot wait for other pieces by Ari Cofer
Warm regards,

Diana Banana @ thatbemediana.blogspot.com

[Shelby Leigh · Rating 5 out of 5]

i was honored to read an early edition of paper girl and provide a blurb for this book. this collection is one of the most honest, compelling, and fierce poetry collections i've read. this is a side of cofer's writing that hasn't been seen, but one that the world needs. it will give you the strength to take back your power and your voice. and as it walks you through the many hardships of life, it will remind you how beautiful it is to be alive.

[Caitlin Conlon]

"Paper Girl and the Knives That Made Her" drags you through the darkness and then brings you back into the sunlight. Through vivid, poignant, and timeless writing, Ari B. Cofer explores themes of mental health and recovery with a voice that's both necessary and haunting. These poems are sharp when they need to be, yet soft in all the right places. These poems invite your ghosts to dinner and then bury them in the same breath. This is a collection that cradles your face in its hands and says "it's okay that you don't know where to return to" and then offers up its pages as a safe place to land. "Paper Girl and the Knives That Made Her" is a haven in a world that so often demands too much of us. It gives its readers permission to heal.

[Mackenzie Hamilton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not only my favorite poetry book, but might be my favorite book of the year. so beautiful, heart wrenching and soul comforting at the same time. i can’t wait to read more of her work

[Lencas · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am speechless
There are no words to describe the greatness of this book. This is a masterpiece
Ari B. Coffer has the power to put in beautiful words what is like to go through some not so beautiful events in life. She spoke directly to my heart with words not even I knew I needed. I cried I smiled I sobbed and I smiled again.
This is a wild and raw ride of mental illness and trauma and recovery. I hope Ari gets all of the things she dreams of because she deserves every ounce of love in the world.

✨ i have tried to be alive again but i know it’s all
fake. it will always be fake. i am always
pretending this didn’t crucify me.


✨ today, i let myself unpack
for the first time in years.
at the bottom of my bag,
i found old suicide notes that read
i am tired of feeling this way.
i threw them away.
the best way to feel lighter
is to lighten the fucking load.


✨ this life is worth it.
and i know you don’t believe it.
you’ve been pushed down so much that living brings you lower
than the earth’s gravity ever could.
but there will be a day when things feel lighter. when you will
look up and the clouds will part. when the sun won’t burn.
it is never too late for you to be loved in the way you deserve.


✨ i hope you change your mind.
use those seven minutes to
swim to the edge of the sad,
not drown in it.
and let yourself live.
you’ve got time.


I know this is the book I will always return to. The one who will give me some peace of mind in the long nights awake.
Thank god she wrote this ❤️

[Caroline D’cruz · Rating 3 out of 5]

For my first poetry book, this book was too dark, gloomy and heavy for me to process. There is no doubt that each poetry is well written. Though, the author say’s that, this book is half fiction and half truth, it only feels like it’s based on whole truth wrapped in a blanket of poetry’s .

I liked that the book started off with a content warning, so that the reader is totally aware of what’s in store. The poems are written from a heartbroken, drepressed, raped, fucked (mind my language), soiled and suicidal girls point of view. Each poem recites like a therapy session of a girl’s worst nightmares. I felt like there was a lot of the author personal life experience in each of the poems.

There were some poems which I loved and could relate to as well:
1: The fairy tale becomes a memory
2: I saw their wedding photos on Facebook
3: when the well ran dry
4: Magic
5: Rest in pieces
6: I don’t want to give you the pleasure of reading your name
7: New girl
8: Good girl
9: My sister turns 20 this month
10: When our skin is too much
11: Permanent

The book also advises you to talk to or share with family and friends, if you feel you are someone going through mental health, suicidal tendencies, or other forms of depression, sexual or drug abuse.

[Seher · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I’ve known god all my life,
and he has a tendency to wander into spaces he shouldn’t. when I’m smoking. crying.
fucking. and I’m tired of him being so greedy,
wanting me to notice him. he is no more real than a cloud in the sky. something to see but fall right through.”

Poetry always depends on the mood the reader. There may come a day when I feel like I didn’t like this, that it was worth one star less or something such; for the moment though, I feel like I got to know someone!

Ari B. Cofer put together a really intimate collection; it felt honest in a way a lot of modern poetry does not. I do not like that she chose to not capitalise words, I feel like that’s a strategy poets use to make try to look like someone’s diary, but I also feel like its a way that a lot of female poets make themselves seem smaller and more palatable and like people can take their words less seriously. I don’t know if I’m saying that properly, but do you get my drift?

I’m looking forward to her next collection and to see her grow!

[Kyra || sylverbooks · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection of words is a window into the deepest, darkest parts of the soul. I can't thank Ari B Cofer, Central Avenue Publishing, and NetGalley for a peer inside.
The poetry and prose takes you on a journey that is so personal and relatable in the saddest ways. The emotion is palpable and the journey is draining. Through the darkness of the first half come a light shining in recovery, but it is not without reality. Cofer does an amazing job of expressing the smallest parts of recovery - doing it for yourself, because you want to see another morning - and the emotional strain it takes.
I highlighted so many phrases of anxieties and pressure, but without a doubt my favourite piece was "dandelion". It's the moment when you step out of the picture frame that someone else has built for you, and realise who you are on your own.

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Benicia Noia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gracias a Netgalley por el envío de una copia avanzada a cambio de una reseña honesta.

TW: Este libro trata temas como la depresión, autolesión, ansiedad, suidicio.

Este libro me transmitió tanta melancolía, tristeza y dolor que sentía que debía tomar respiros de la lectura por momentos. Si bien tiene unos versos maravillosos y una prosa poética admirable, la intensidad del libro me superó e hizo que mi lectura fuera un poco lenta.

No obstante, esto no quita la belleza de la escritura de la autora y que realmente logró su objetivo de transmitir lo que sentía en cada palabra.

[Victoria Gehman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I always say my favorite poetry is that which is raw and real. In authenticity, we connect the most deeply with one another. Ari's words reminded me I am not alone in my struggles with mental health and suicidal ideation. I am grateful for the way she shared so honestly and candidly. If you struggle with thoughts of believing you'd be better off dead, I recommend this book -- in it you will find that you are not alone, and also that there is hope -- even when the struggles never fully go away.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

CW: mental health conditions, suicide/suicidal ideation, self-harm, sexual assault, gun violence, violence against POC, body dysmorphia, drug/alcohol use, overdose

Thank you to NetGalley and Central Avenue Publishing for an advanced electronic copy of this book in exchange for an honest review!

This poetry collection is raw and deep with the overall message that things HURT, but they may not always. Even if things are bad for a while, find a reason to hold on. It's relatable for those who have struggled, but definitely a read you need to be ready for before starting.

[Mark Alpheus · Rating 5 out of 5]

Poetry recommendation! 📖

Ari B. Cofer's Paper Girl and the Knives That Made Her is a poetry book discussing rape, trauma, and healing.

This was the book I ended 2021 with and I'm hoping you'd read it as well.

Just the first few poems of this collection already got me tearing up. I am not kidding when I say this is a hard-hitting, heart-wrenching and truly emotional read. The author really went into detail about mental health, among any other things.

I was too emotional to finish it in one go. But mind you, when the author starts talking about healing, suddenly it just hits. It's so hopeful, and personally there's a lot of reflections I've had after reading it.

Available now on Amazon and other stores!

Note that I was sent an early copy of this book by the publisher via Netgalley, nevertheless, this is an honest review and all thoughts are mine.

[mike f. · Rating 4 out of 5]

so powerful and so beautiful. this collection holds a very personal topic with me and i truly appreciated reading this

[Jess · Rating 4 out of 5]

this was beautiful and heartbreaking and it made me cry - def check TWs and be ready to feel seen and numb and seen again

[Beth Voecks · Rating 5 out of 5]

Truly powerful stuff. Please head the trigger warnings before you jump into this book, however. It got to be a bit much for me towards the middle of the book.

[Laur · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is an extremely difficult review to write as I thought about DNFing several times, but that wouldn’t be true to my agreement to provide an honest review in exchange for a copy. It wasn't that I was caught off guard, for I expected dark prose and gloomy poetry given the book's title and opening blurb.

The book’s beginning pages came with content warnings (and also kind advice). Kudo’s to the author for providing those advance warnings. The warnings included the following:
• Mental Health Conditions
• Suicide/Suicidal Ideation
• Self-Harm
• Sexual Assault
• Gun Violence
• Violence against poc
• Brief mentions of body dysmorphia
• Brief mentions of drug/alcohol use*
• + other tough topics

Ok - Holy smokes! That’s a LOT of heavy stuff in a book of 176 pgs (NetGalley ARC copy version...with some pages blank at the end). *I would disagree with the word “brief” when applied to drug use.

What I liked about this book:
• The cover design
• The title of the book
• The drawn illustrations
• What I believe (hope) was the author's intent in writing this creative work.**

What I didn't like about this book:
• MORE than half of the book is focused on the deeply dark. It had the feel of a journal one might keep in therapy. However, the opening of the book (in part) mentions “This is a work of FICTION”, the “product of the author's Imagination” - Italics mine). Knowing that up front, gave me a feeling that what was written, was LESS THAN TRUE heartfelt realism (as is often expressed in poetry), even though the author states that SOME of the pieces are based on true stories.
• The road to recovery receives a lot less time and attention. When the road to recovery begins to be expressed, it is way too simplistic, rushed.
• Peppered with frequent F*Bombs (even in recovery sections)
• Unflattering references to god/religion (the word “god” as written in book).

Summary: I'm extremely familiar, and most certainly, no stranger to depression. I have seen the effects of serious mental illness in countless others, and unfortunately have also experienced seeing ones give up on life.

The Content: I get the meaning of the book’s title, the meaning of “paper girl”, meaning of “knives”, but was completely disappointed in content here. It didn't uplift me, nor did I appreciate the style of writing. The “dark writing” was understandably angry, intense, hopeless. The “road to recovery-journey to heal” writing felt so shallow, hollow, ordinary, insincere.
I was hoping this read would be inspiring, illuminating, healing, AFTER the darkness was expressed, after all the effects of the proverbial knives.. For some reviewers, it was all that. For me - no, not even close. The negativity/darkness content FAR outweighed any positivity or healing implied. Then I remembered this is a work of FICTION, the product of the authors imagination. With a minimum of no less than 9 trigger warnings - obviously this publication is not for everyone.

Perhaps the reading of the author’s creative thoughts and poetry will provide a lesson for some to experience a mental darkness they have never experienced or seen before. Or perhaps it gives a voice to someone who stayed silent, who could never speak or felt misunderstood if they tried. My hope is that it will provide whatever enjoyment /benefit to the reader that the author intended.**

1.5 rounded up to 2 Stars

My thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for my honest opinion. ALL opinions are my own.

[Malli (Chapter Malliumpkin) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Arc was given by Central Avenue Publishing & NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

This review is being published before the release date (January 4th 2022)


Content/Trigger Warnings: Mental health conditions, suicide/suicidal ideation, self-harm, talk of depression, sexual assault, gun violence, violence against poc, brief mentions of body dysmorphia, brief mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, grief, loss of loved ones, heartbreak, talk of medication, trauma/PTSD, and much more!

“I hold my breath because I’m afraid of losing what’s left of you in an exhale.”

In a room full of books, this is one of the loudest books in that room. Truly, this book is filled with raw emotions, very dark topics, but so important. There aren’t enough enough words to say how emotional I felt reading this poetry collection and I truly believe, with my whole chest, that this is such an important read. We need more books with the voices of those and their own experiences because there is always someone out there who needs to hear those perspectives. And as someone who has gone through similar hardships, I really appreciated reading about another person’s experiences and being reminded that healing is never linear.

Some of my favorite poems include:
– The fairytale becomes a memory
– Sacrifices
– What do you think the birds are saying when they sing?
– Heavy
– When it feels too much
– The garden that bursts with wanting
– Juxtapose
– Welcome Home

Overall, I think anyone who picks this book up is in for an emotional ride, but a ride that is so heartbreakingly beautiful and important. Though I feel there’s so much I could say about this poetry collection, I feel I don’t need to say anything because this poetry collection speaks volumes for itself. And if you’re a poetry lover like myself, then I want to encourage you to add this one to your ‘to be read’ piles.


The quotes above were taken from an ARC and are subject to change upon publication.


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[andrea v. (andrea’s galley) · Rating 5 out of 5]

“i think about how we are both paper
but i was the one who got the cuts.”

Genre: Poetry, New Adult, Self-Help
Actual Rating: 5 stars
Content Warnings: Given by the author (10/10 for that)— Discusses mental health conditions, suicide/suicidal ideation, self-harm, sexual assault, gun violence, and violence against POC. Briefly mentions body dysmorphia and drug/alcohol use, and other tough topics.

First things first, I must say I came into this book a bit biased. I have loved Ari B. Cofer’s poetry (and illustrations) on instagram for years. I have been on her email list/tender poets club for a while now too. I came in knowing I would love this book. I knew it would be great. But yeah, not even my wildest thoughts could’ve predicted how much this book would move me.

This debut poetry collection does not disappoint. It’ll take you through an emotional rollercoaster, for sure, but it’ll also soothe you with doodles and drawings scattered between the words. These drawings are characteristic of Ari B. Colfer’s work, as can be seen on her social media (@ari.b.colfer on instagram, check her out, you won’t regret it), and they add a special touch to this collection. I know doodles and drawings aren’t an innovation when it comes to contemporary poetry books, but hear me when I say that Ari’s drawing hit different. With their bright colors and harsh words, they bring so much to this book.

Not all poems in this collection are perfect—some are more like a broken down sentence pretending to be a poem—yet I seriously couldn’t recommend this poetry book enough.

I would recommend this book to people who’ve hurt before but are halfway through (or fully) mending now. This book could be a tough read for anyone who’s vividly living through a mental health crisis right now or who is still processing a traumatic event. Be careful when you grab this book. Be gentle with it and with yourself. But grab it once you’re feeling up to it, as it’ll be healing in and of itself.

ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you so much to Central Avenue Publishing for letting me read an early copy of this book. I preordered a physical copy this morning because 1) I love Ari’s poetry, and 2) It’s just that good and I feel a need for a physical copy even though I’ve already read it.

“you will remind yourself it’s not your fault.
you did not choose to be raped,
the rapist chose to be a rapist,
you’ll remind yourself to let go.”

[Lyss · Rating 5 out of 5]

An e-ARC was provided to me by NetGalley and Central Avenue Publishing in exchange for an honest review

Paper Girl and the Knives that Made Her is so much more than a poetry collection. It’s an uncomfortable look into the darkest parts of life that you can’t take your eyes off of.

Content warnings are necessary for this and are included in the beginning of the book but for those that are looking to read it content warnings include: mental health conditions, suicide/suicidal ideation, self harm, sexual assault, gun violence, violence against poc, brief mentions of body dysmorphia, brief mentions of drug/alcohol abuse and other tough topics.

Paper Girls felt like I was reading my own diary. It left me feeling seen in ways that I didn’t know were possible. It’s a punch in the gut to those who have experienced the hardships mentioned in the content warnings. I’ve read countless books that spoke of mental illness and addiction and assault but none of them stuck with me the ways this has. My mind has been wandering back to it since completing my first read and I can say with confidence I’ll be reading it again.

I’ve heard countless times that art is supposed to make you feel something but this book doesn’t just make you feel something, it makes you live something. It makes you feel like you’re an unwilling accomplice in every trauma that unfolds and you can’t pull yourself out of it.

The grimiest memories that spent years hidden revealed themselves as I read this and I seriously stress that the content warnings are necessary but if you feel you can handle reading it I can’t suggest it enough. So many poetry collections read like romanticizations of trauma and tragedy but this couldn’t have done that less. If I could force everyone that doesn’t believe in mental illness to read this I genuinely believe it would change their minds.

Overall this was heartbreaking, uncomfortable and more real than I was ready to experience but it was a masterpiece above all else. Some people are born to write but others are born to tell stories that stick with people like a cold you can’t shake and that’s exactly the type of person Ari is.

[Dessie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to Net Galley for providing me with an arc of this book in exchange for an honest review. "Paper Girl and the Knives that Made Her" is an incredibly deep and dark poetry collection. From the very beginning the reader is immersed in this gloomy and breathtaking atmosphere, this book does not promise any positivity or up-lifting and indeed, there is nothing truly positive. This is by no means bad, but it is important for the reader to know what to expect. Now, because of the heavy topics included in this poetry collection, many people, including me, will most definitely relate to the content, while many others will not, which is perfectly fine. The type of the works included in this poetry collection varies, there are illustrations, short and long poems, list poems (as I like to call them) and some poetic prose. Some poems left me with the impression that there were included just to fill space, which I certainly did not like. The trigger warnings are included in the beginning of the book, which is great, taking into consideration how dark the content is. The trigger warnings include body dysmorphia, sexual abuse, suicide attempts and suicidal thoughts, mentions of drug and alcohol use, mental health issues, self-harm, gun violence, violence against people of colour, etc. Very emotional and personal read, but absolutely nor for everyone because of the heavy topics.

[Larisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ari is the first person to truly capture the depth of the pain I experience at the hands of mental illness, as well as the love that keeps my pulse marching on. Never before have I read such a wholly accurate and acute analysis of emotion in a truly emotional format. Other reviews here criticize the author's decision to publish her innermost desires and conflicts, but it is this unprecedented revelation of self (mind and body) that distinguishes this anthology as extraordinary. To those critics who dislike the vulnerability and authenticity of this author: you simply prove that the author achieved her goals in writing this- vulnerability and authenticity.

If you experience severe depression or have a family member experiencing depression, read this book. It explains suicidality and other symptoms of depression with expert precision, as well as provides readers with a litany of affirmation and support: you are not alone, you can survive this, you have a future in this world, you belong.

To Ari, thank you for verbalizing the ceaseless barrage of pain in my head and for being living proof that life will get better. I graduated high school, left my first partner, and remain continually motivated as a direct result of your book. It lies annotated, highlighted, worn, cherished, and known on my bed each night.