Disgraced

by Saira Ahmed & Andrew Crofts

Brought up in a violent Muslim household, where family honour is all, Saira is watched 24 hours a day.

However, an innocent friendship with a boy is uncovered and Saira is sent to Pakistan, punished for dishonouring her family.

There, the nightmare really begins. Forced to marry an older stranger who rapes her repeatedly and makes her his round-the-clock sex slave, she eventually plots her escape but, destitute, has to return to the family home in England. Once there, she discovers that one of her brothers has run up huge drug debts and Saira must earn money in the only way she can: by selling her body.

Disgraced is the true story of an innocence ruined and a life shattered. But it is also a tale of survival told by a woman who has finally discovered her true voice.

Genres: Nonfiction, Biography, Memoir, Pakistan

307 pages, Paperback

First published August 21, 2008

Reviews

[Saskia 'follow my shoes' Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

its a good book, story line of her live is very in depth and she doesnt hold back, which is what makes this a good book to read, i do recommend it.The book is a no holds barred account of a tragic life story. The narratve is engaging and the story unfolds well. An amazing story of survival, all the more remarkable when you realise that these things are happening, not just in Pakistan, but in modern day Britain too.When Saira meets and falls for a young man, also of Pakistani origin, and wants to marry him, her brothers are shocked that she has dishonoured herself by even meeting someone. They are quick to put a stop to this. Saira is quickly dispatched to Pakistan and married off to someone she has never met, who wants a British passport. The marriage is traumatic, and Saira eventually manages to escape. Surprisingly she returns to her family in England, and goes back to earning, by any means, enough to pay off family debts. Beaten, abused, prostitution and many more horrific things happen to this girl, who in the end survived.

[Harini R · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very interesting theme prevalent in a lot of Asian communities at various levels of extremity.
The book describes a realistic society where family ties and woes are ranked higher up in priority; where marrying off a women (respectably) is seen as the ultimate purpose of their existence ; where within the walls of their own minds women are being subjected to torture & trauma continuously because of lack of independence.

While the book starts off very well arousing curiosity & interest , it starts losing sheen & withers away towards the end!

[Sabrina Rutter · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn't put this book down!There is so much to this woman's story! I couldn't believe all the things this young woman went through before she was even 20 years old. This is a really good memoir!
*spoilers*
Saira's problems pretty much started the day she was born as a girl in a strict muslim family. She was not allowed to play outside with the other neighborhood children, or go to their birthday parties so this made it difficult for her to ever form any friendships. Having no friends and feeling very low about herself due to her mothers constant putdowns Saira very rarely spoke up for herself.
Saira finally found the courage to stand up for herself when she was rejected as a possible bride by her sister-in-laws handsome brother. She went to confront him not knowing what horrible nightmare that would bring into her already difficult life.
Some parts of Saira's story may seem hard to accept as truth, especially the part about the loan sharks. Since I know a little about how immigrants get into debt with these criminals and also a little about a muslim womans pride I can honestly say I believe Saira. I know no muslim woman is going to claim she was a prostitute if she wasn't!
Saira's story is not only about a difficult life journey, but also about learning how to speak up for yourself, and taking your destiny into your own hands no matter how terrifying that might be.

[Rashad Raoufi]

its a harrowing tale, deeply moving and profoundly emotional,very honestly told. i dare not criticise the writing of the book simply because its too emotive to be analysed.it should read as part of someone broadcasting their message, thier life to us, and hers rightfully deserves to be read, however i think the character does not spend too much time or tell us more off her addiction to easy from prostitution as horrible as it is and its toll on her, she hints strongly which is very brave.i like the ending as it give us some hope, she survived and has window to future.

[Kp · Rating 5 out of 5]

Disgraced is a fantastic, true and loving novel. It has a great sense of knowledge. Truly, I think this book was exceptionally fantastic and views a great sense of humour.
I would truly recommend this book to adults.

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Indrukwekkend verhaal over leven in een wereld met twee culturen. Een inkijkje in een leven dat ik niet ken, en daar mag ik mijzelf gelukkig mee prijzen.

[Aaliyah Behbehani · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book made me feel thankful for all the things that hasn't happened to me..

[Jadyn Right · Rating 5 out of 5]

Saira’s story will stay with me forever. I don’t think I can, in good conscience, recommend this to anyone because I know, without a doubt, it will break your heart into pieces. It shattered mine. But through all the pain, my queen got her ending. Not a perfect one, but one where she gets to live. She gets to give her baby girl the best life. She gets to start over.

My heart aches for everything she endured, and yet I hold on to the hope that she’s healing. That maybe, just maybe, she’s finding peace in the life she fought so hard to keep.

[Nilu Asad · Rating 5 out of 5]

Saira's story was really heartbreaking. But, I didn't like the way she generalized Muslims. I am a Muslim woman who was given the right to study. I always went out with friends without my Mom at my back. My husband is a Muslim man who I admire so much. My father was the most humble and loving man. It's high time to stop mixing the stupid culture and naming it as Islam. However, I liked the ending that sounds hopeful, where she survived and opened a new window to future.

[Dana Shalabi · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is an interesting read and it has enough in it yo keep you wanting to read more. . However, the author did make a few statements that kind of annoyed me as a Muslim. For example she portrayed men in the Muslim world. According to her Muslim men are awful they just want to abuse women . Her story os heartbreaking but im happy woth the ending

[Farid · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well! To be honest it's a great inspirational and a heart touching book the story and the condition that the lady gone through is just a super example that how to be strong and move on in our life..

[Rachael Brown · Rating 5 out of 5]

sad book but a good read

[Nora · Rating 3 out of 5]

done

[Danial Tanvir · Rating 5 out of 5]

this is a lovely book by saira ahmed.
her family says that she has brought dishonour and shame to her family.
she lives in england to a pakistani family.
she is born in 1971.
she grows up in a very religous family and she is not allowed to talk to boys and even to look at them.
this is thought to be a sin.
this is how her life is.
she falls in love with a man called aman and her family is very angry with her.
so what happens is that she is sent to pakistan where she is forced to marry a man who is very bad to her and is cruel to her and he makes her his sex slave.
he rapes her again and again.
she then goes back to england and then comes back to pakistan and when she comes here, she is in big trouble.
she founds out that she is stuck in pakistan and can do nothing about it.
she then decides to escape from pakistan and go back to england.
she does not tell this to any one and goes to england but even there she is scared for her life and she thinks that her brothers or relatives might kill her if they found out.
she then has no other option then to sell her body and to have sex with different clients.
her life is terrible and she is going through a bad time.
she then founds a man called zahoor and gets married to him .
things are better for some time but then zahoor also starts being abusive towards her and she does not know what to do.
after that she has a child who is a girl called jasmine. and then she calls the police and tells her that she is being abused and then zahoor is arrested and she stars a new life with her baby.
this memoir was great and i would really love to read any other book the author would write!.

[Merq · Rating 5 out of 5]

Worth of reading! Saira was born into a traditional family in the modern world and her complex, horrible path from the miserable bottom towards the more independent better future was so addicting to read that I noticed that I was reading page after page after page nonstop. Inspirational story; never give up in life even when the others try to keep you down. And most importantly; leave those people behind you who try to poison your life.

[Pam Coll · Rating 4 out of 5]

A gripping and believable memoir. The tragedy of a violent "honour-centred" culture where "honour" is anything but, condoned by centuries of tradition. Pride, selfish greed, viciousness and paranoia win in this story every day over justice, mercy, honesty and faith. Truly sad.

[Rochelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book a really easy read and thoroughly enjoyed learning about other cultures and the displacement of Muslim women in Britain culture. Saira's story of survival is inspiring

[Leo · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought provoking, really interesting book.

[Teagan-jayde · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strong. Insightful. Intense

[Asliali · Rating 1 out of 5]

Hmmmm... would read this in maybe year 6. Sad sad story but also full of so many stereotypes. Interesting, and would definitely be moving if it just wasnt a recount

[Ranjana · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very compelling account of a woman abused by family from childhood who had to resort to prostitution to pay off her family’s debts.

[Kathy Petrakis · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think this novel was a great story. In fact, I would have liked more detail and the ability to go through the experiences with the author. Sometimes it felt more like a memoir and I would prefer to be in the moment with her.

I read it within days and found the story sad but unique. I would like to know where the main character is today...I was keen for more!!

[Susan Mierlo · Rating 2 out of 5]

Het was op zich een interessant verhaal, maar met wel heel erg stereotype mensen. Dat vond ik jammer, want daardoor verliest het verhaal een deel van zijn geloofwaardigheid, hoewel hetgeen Saira heeft meegemaakt vreselijk genoeg is. Maar in haar boek komen alle stereotypen met betrekking tot moslims en Pakistan aan bod.

[Fazira Ridzuan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I can't imagine with what she faced. very tragic and I'm quite disappointed with the path she chose. However, things happen for a reason. I adore the strength she have in raising her child and helping out her parents. It's the struggle of a daughter and mother for a better life. And it teaches me to be thankful of my life and people around me.

[Lynette · Rating 3 out of 5]

Would like to have known more about what happened to the ex boyfriend, the
brothers etc. Weird that the parents could get into so much debt and not
be responsible for sorting it themselves or wondering where she was getting the money!

[Sharon · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sad what some girls are put through, in the name of religion and family honour. This book was quite exciting in the start, but deteriated in the middle and petered out in the end. A ok read

[Lorraine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good read but sad to read about what this girl went through. Found myself getting angry a few times

[Julie-Anne VandenHoff · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting perspective and insight to an unspoken world...

[Ikra · Rating 3 out of 5]

really good

[P · Rating 1 out of 5]

- didn't take long to read but came across very much like a long recount
- not great storytelling
- repetitive
- yes, it's a terrible situation but it didn't have heart