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It's Your Funeral!: Plan the Celebration of a Lifetime Before It's Too Late
You can't attend your own funeral. But you can have a blast planning it! Death is scary--but planning your funeral doesn't have to be! It's Your Funeral! will help demystify death, decrease your anxiety, and put the fun back in funeral, whether that means a drunken bacchanal or a somber reflection on just how great you were. Every stage of the legacy planning process is considered, from a burial outfit to a funeral theme. Practical and cheeky questions alike are answered, • What is the most eco-friendly burial method? • Can I write my own obituary? • Can my body be shot into space after I die? • How can I manage my digital legacy? Offering a plethora of curious facts, strange stories, and inspiration to help you think outside the coffin, It's Your Funeral! includes worksheets that will ensure your wishes are recorded for posterity. Planning for death should be the time of your life, so let's get started!
1 pages, Audio CD
First published August 17, 2021
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 56 reviews
August 17, 2021
*Thank you so much to Penguin Random House Int. for sending me a copy for review!*
I wasn’t expecting to halfheartedly plan my own funeral as a healthy 22 year old, but hey, nobody told me this book was interactive and had entire worksheets in it. And who am I to leave a worksheet blank? I’m not a quitter.
This book was actually quite informative as someone who has only ever attended one funeral and was quite young - so doesn't really remember at all what it consisted of. I’m now older and acutely aware of my own mortality as well as that of everyone around me, so this was actually pretty useful in preparing me for the inevitable. I liked the ‘death positive’ approach it took, and how it didn't tiptoe around the issue, just said it all as it is. I appreciated that and actually learned some pretty cool facts.
Though it went through a lot of the history of funeral services and what modern day services usually look like and all the various aspects of death and whatnot, this book was very Western focussed and at that - very American. I would’ve liked a broader and more inclusive range, especially in terms of history because I found the bits to do with other cultures and their traditions super interesting. As a British person also, I’m not actually sure how useful some of it was. I’m sure a lot of it might translate in a pretty straightforward manner, but who knows. I also feel like a glossary or something would’ve been cool because some of the terms were mixing around in my brain a bit. A death glossary, bit morbid but hey I think it would’ve been useful.
This book was bizarre, I won’t lie to you. The worksheets were pretty cool but I didn’t really end up taking them seriously as they’re a bit morbid. I know that's the point and this poor author spent the entire time trying not to make ti all doom and gloom, but I was still mildly creeped out by the concept I can't lie. I answered most of the questions halfheartedly as a joke because I didn’t know how to approach them in all honesty. I genuinely can’t quite figure out who the intended audience for the book is, and even though I’ve read it I still don’t know whether it was me? It was all just a bit confusing. I also showed my sister what I was doing and she was a bit horrified, which made me laugh. It was fine, but not necessarily a book I needed at this juncture in my existence.
I also just wanna say, this book is genuinely so pretty. Like, props to the design team because inside and out I absolutely adore the aesthetic. The fonts, the colours, the little doodles inside - they’re fab.
I wasn’t expecting to halfheartedly plan my own funeral as a healthy 22 year old, but hey, nobody told me this book was interactive and had entire worksheets in it. And who am I to leave a worksheet blank? I’m not a quitter.
This book was actually quite informative as someone who has only ever attended one funeral and was quite young - so doesn't really remember at all what it consisted of. I’m now older and acutely aware of my own mortality as well as that of everyone around me, so this was actually pretty useful in preparing me for the inevitable. I liked the ‘death positive’ approach it took, and how it didn't tiptoe around the issue, just said it all as it is. I appreciated that and actually learned some pretty cool facts.
Though it went through a lot of the history of funeral services and what modern day services usually look like and all the various aspects of death and whatnot, this book was very Western focussed and at that - very American. I would’ve liked a broader and more inclusive range, especially in terms of history because I found the bits to do with other cultures and their traditions super interesting. As a British person also, I’m not actually sure how useful some of it was. I’m sure a lot of it might translate in a pretty straightforward manner, but who knows. I also feel like a glossary or something would’ve been cool because some of the terms were mixing around in my brain a bit. A death glossary, bit morbid but hey I think it would’ve been useful.
This book was bizarre, I won’t lie to you. The worksheets were pretty cool but I didn’t really end up taking them seriously as they’re a bit morbid. I know that's the point and this poor author spent the entire time trying not to make ti all doom and gloom, but I was still mildly creeped out by the concept I can't lie. I answered most of the questions halfheartedly as a joke because I didn’t know how to approach them in all honesty. I genuinely can’t quite figure out who the intended audience for the book is, and even though I’ve read it I still don’t know whether it was me? It was all just a bit confusing. I also showed my sister what I was doing and she was a bit horrified, which made me laugh. It was fine, but not necessarily a book I needed at this juncture in my existence.
I also just wanna say, this book is genuinely so pretty. Like, props to the design team because inside and out I absolutely adore the aesthetic. The fonts, the colours, the little doodles inside - they’re fab.
July 20, 2021
A few years ago my mother gave me a shock when she told me how she wanted her funeral to go and had it all planned out and written into her will. Having never given that much thought to dying I had no idea you could do that & it’s become something that has fascinated me since.
This book covers everything; things you’d expect such as burial versus cremation to what to do with the remains afterwards (so many options!) and things I never thought of at all such as your digital legacy (what to do with your twitter account for example) and whether your happy for selfies to be taken during the funeral. I’ve seen a lot of that about lately and quite frankly it weirds me out so ‘no selfies’ is going in my action plan for starters. That’s another thing I liked: that many sections have exercises to do so if you are serious about planning your funeral there are lots of good prompts to use.
It’s an American author but she regularly points out that what is allowed there may not be the same for your own country so for things that of interest best to check your countries rules. And a bonus point (probably because she’s American not British) for not including Robbie Williams’ Angel as a good funeral song. Genuinely hate that song and yet everyone seems to have it as their favourite. Really?? I’m having Highway to Hell as I go off into the fire….
Interspersed (big word for me) are short sections about cultural celebrations and funeral rites that are fascinating. We all do it differently and no one way is better than others. Also helps should you ever be invited to a funeral outside your own religion or culture. The tag line for the book is putting the fun into funerals and while it covers a serious topic and includes so much important information there’s a great informal way to the writing and it’s full of humour. For me, I like that. Hard enough trying to think about these things without having a dry, written text to go with it.
I love it. Quite simple. Especially after the last 18 months living through a global pandemic death and funerals is probably on a lot of people’s minds. We’re probably not used to having it in our faces quite so much as we’ve had lately. I imagine a lot of people are now considering their own mortality. This book does help. It’s packed full of information, questions to ask of yourself and the action plans to make sure you have full control of how you want your send off to go (or not if your into cryogenics & are planning on your big Vegas comeback). It’s helpful, it’s insightful and I will recommend it to anyone
This book covers everything; things you’d expect such as burial versus cremation to what to do with the remains afterwards (so many options!) and things I never thought of at all such as your digital legacy (what to do with your twitter account for example) and whether your happy for selfies to be taken during the funeral. I’ve seen a lot of that about lately and quite frankly it weirds me out so ‘no selfies’ is going in my action plan for starters. That’s another thing I liked: that many sections have exercises to do so if you are serious about planning your funeral there are lots of good prompts to use.
It’s an American author but she regularly points out that what is allowed there may not be the same for your own country so for things that of interest best to check your countries rules. And a bonus point (probably because she’s American not British) for not including Robbie Williams’ Angel as a good funeral song. Genuinely hate that song and yet everyone seems to have it as their favourite. Really?? I’m having Highway to Hell as I go off into the fire….
Interspersed (big word for me) are short sections about cultural celebrations and funeral rites that are fascinating. We all do it differently and no one way is better than others. Also helps should you ever be invited to a funeral outside your own religion or culture. The tag line for the book is putting the fun into funerals and while it covers a serious topic and includes so much important information there’s a great informal way to the writing and it’s full of humour. For me, I like that. Hard enough trying to think about these things without having a dry, written text to go with it.
I love it. Quite simple. Especially after the last 18 months living through a global pandemic death and funerals is probably on a lot of people’s minds. We’re probably not used to having it in our faces quite so much as we’ve had lately. I imagine a lot of people are now considering their own mortality. This book does help. It’s packed full of information, questions to ask of yourself and the action plans to make sure you have full control of how you want your send off to go (or not if your into cryogenics & are planning on your big Vegas comeback). It’s helpful, it’s insightful and I will recommend it to anyone
October 3, 2021
Really good, funny book on death positivity. Highly recommend for fans of Caitlin Doughty.
January 8, 2022
2.5 The planning prompts were helpful — though I wish they were maybe in a separate workbook.
This is better suited for those who are dipping their toes into anything death related. If you’ve been on the Caitlin Doughty bandwagon for awhile there isn’t a lot of new information here. Might be worth a read for some. Just wasn’t for me.
This is better suited for those who are dipping their toes into anything death related. If you’ve been on the Caitlin Doughty bandwagon for awhile there isn’t a lot of new information here. Might be worth a read for some. Just wasn’t for me.
August 8, 2023
“It’s Your Funeral!” is a nonfiction book focusing on helping the reader decrease their anxiety involving the death and burial process in a fun way. By providing guided journal elements, worksheets, and examples, author Kathy Benjamin successes in helping readers feel more comfortable with death and well as empowered to write down their final wishes.
The book consists of an introduction, a brief history of funerals as well as twenty-nine chapters divided into three parts. After part three ends, Benjamin provides an epilogue, a further reading list, an index, and acknowledgments.
In the introduction, I was shocked to learn that the average funeral cost $10,000 and despite this large cost and that few people plan for their funerals. After sharing actor Nicolas Cage’s funeral preparations, Benjamin says it’s important to face death head on to help family members later. Planning your own funeral is an act of love. Considering that we all are going to die one day, it’s vital to plan your funeral but do it in a fun way.
In the brief history of funerals, Benjamin shares that funerals have existed as long as humans have been in existence and have changed throughout history. I was surprised to learn all funerals have a three-part process and include the burial, a ceremony or ritual accompanying the burial, and a memorial or marker for the dead. Benjamin provides examples of early funerals and elaborate ways to honor the dead. In was fascinating to learn about the death positive movement which is an attitude towards death and funerals that is centered on open and honest discussion about dying and end-of-life options.
Part one “It’s Your Body,” focuses on different ways to being buried after death including ground burial, cremation, natural burial, recomposting, tree burial, burial at sea, coral reef burial, body donation, body farms, cryonics, plastination, mummification, and space burial. It was interesting to learn a little of what occurs during the embalming process to have an open coffin funeral as well as high cost of ground burial. It was fascinating to learn that cremains can be turned into things such as a diamond, body paint, a playable record, fireworks, a tattoo, a bullet, or a stuffed animal.
Part two “It’s Your Funeral” provide a brief overview of funeral traditions of major religions including Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Wicca, Zoroastrianism, and secular/no religion. It was interesting to read about “living funerals” for those with terminal illnesses as a way to be celebrated while still alive. Also addressed were funeral crashers, picking a funeral venue, assigning funeral roles, funeral themes, funeral dress codes, flowers and food for the funeral, eulogy funeral readings, picking photos where you and interactive funeral activities.
Part three “It’s Your Legacy” focuses on ways to memorialize yourself after death including a headstone, epitaph, crypts, mausoleums, funerary sculpture, memorial benches, memorial plaques, and a monument. It was helpful that Benjamin provides samples for readers to use in composing their epitaph. Also included are reminder to share digital legacy, life accomplishments, and humorous tips on how to haunt someone and a place to write a message to loved ones.
In the epilogue, Benjamin commends the reader for facing their mortality and to continue to find their death plans. Although people are afraid to talk about death, it’s vital to for the reader to share with family and friends death positivity and preparing final death arrangements as a way to feel more in control of your life and help them during a trying time. In addition to worksheets provided in the book to help the reader in their death preparation, I also liked that each chapter has a segment discussing such funeral traditions as viewings, nine nights, wakes, shemira, jazz funerals, famadihana, and month’s mind.
The book is made more enjoyable by the addition of curious facts and strange stories including actor Luke Perry choosing to be buried in a mushroom suit, a list of celebrity burial hoards, famous graveside rituals, and famous cemeteries to visit. As I finished this book, I realized that Death is a natural part of life. Having said this, it’s important to prepare for one’s death today while you are alive and can make your wishes known to make things easier for those you are leaving behind.
The book consists of an introduction, a brief history of funerals as well as twenty-nine chapters divided into three parts. After part three ends, Benjamin provides an epilogue, a further reading list, an index, and acknowledgments.
In the introduction, I was shocked to learn that the average funeral cost $10,000 and despite this large cost and that few people plan for their funerals. After sharing actor Nicolas Cage’s funeral preparations, Benjamin says it’s important to face death head on to help family members later. Planning your own funeral is an act of love. Considering that we all are going to die one day, it’s vital to plan your funeral but do it in a fun way.
In the brief history of funerals, Benjamin shares that funerals have existed as long as humans have been in existence and have changed throughout history. I was surprised to learn all funerals have a three-part process and include the burial, a ceremony or ritual accompanying the burial, and a memorial or marker for the dead. Benjamin provides examples of early funerals and elaborate ways to honor the dead. In was fascinating to learn about the death positive movement which is an attitude towards death and funerals that is centered on open and honest discussion about dying and end-of-life options.
Part one “It’s Your Body,” focuses on different ways to being buried after death including ground burial, cremation, natural burial, recomposting, tree burial, burial at sea, coral reef burial, body donation, body farms, cryonics, plastination, mummification, and space burial. It was interesting to learn a little of what occurs during the embalming process to have an open coffin funeral as well as high cost of ground burial. It was fascinating to learn that cremains can be turned into things such as a diamond, body paint, a playable record, fireworks, a tattoo, a bullet, or a stuffed animal.
Part two “It’s Your Funeral” provide a brief overview of funeral traditions of major religions including Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Wicca, Zoroastrianism, and secular/no religion. It was interesting to read about “living funerals” for those with terminal illnesses as a way to be celebrated while still alive. Also addressed were funeral crashers, picking a funeral venue, assigning funeral roles, funeral themes, funeral dress codes, flowers and food for the funeral, eulogy funeral readings, picking photos where you and interactive funeral activities.
Part three “It’s Your Legacy” focuses on ways to memorialize yourself after death including a headstone, epitaph, crypts, mausoleums, funerary sculpture, memorial benches, memorial plaques, and a monument. It was helpful that Benjamin provides samples for readers to use in composing their epitaph. Also included are reminder to share digital legacy, life accomplishments, and humorous tips on how to haunt someone and a place to write a message to loved ones.
In the epilogue, Benjamin commends the reader for facing their mortality and to continue to find their death plans. Although people are afraid to talk about death, it’s vital to for the reader to share with family and friends death positivity and preparing final death arrangements as a way to feel more in control of your life and help them during a trying time. In addition to worksheets provided in the book to help the reader in their death preparation, I also liked that each chapter has a segment discussing such funeral traditions as viewings, nine nights, wakes, shemira, jazz funerals, famadihana, and month’s mind.
The book is made more enjoyable by the addition of curious facts and strange stories including actor Luke Perry choosing to be buried in a mushroom suit, a list of celebrity burial hoards, famous graveside rituals, and famous cemeteries to visit. As I finished this book, I realized that Death is a natural part of life. Having said this, it’s important to prepare for one’s death today while you are alive and can make your wishes known to make things easier for those you are leaving behind.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 17, 2022
This was really my first introduction to the death positivity movement and I daresay I enjoyed it. This book was full of my kind of humor. All the headers were some kind of pun. The author let their own voice shine through the writing via asides and references to content mentioned earlier. It was also cool to read about funerary practices from different cultures and the different, but mostly similar, ways that people deal with death and loss and grief. I also thought the activities were thought provoking and I liked that the descriptions weren’t overly euphemistic. I didn’t really know what went on behind the scenes for a funeral or graveside service to take place, but taking away that ambiguity also took away some of the anxiety. It’s harder to be scared of things you understand, I suppose.
Overall I think this is a valuable read for any age. It isn’t morbid or dark, but instead very pragmatic and I appreciate that.
Overall I think this is a valuable read for any age. It isn’t morbid or dark, but instead very pragmatic and I appreciate that.
June 22, 2022
I feel pretty confident that this is THE most fun book about planning for your death.
May 17, 2022
3.5/5 stars.
Funny little guide that is actually surprisingly insightful and helpful for planning your funeral! If you're young and healthy, you might not be thinking about the possibility that you, too, will one day kick the bucket but even then it can be important for you to know what it is that you want... after.
I learned some interesting facts about death that I hadn't yet learned from the various other death books I've read, and the tone of the whole thing was light so it wasn't tough on my emotions.
I thought I had everything important planned out, but it turns out there's so much more to think about! For example, I have decided that the dress code for my funeral should be pyjamas & loungewear. Onesies are also acceptable.
I didn't care much for the worksheet aspect of the book. Instead, I used the prompts to update my funeral plan document in the Cloud (haha, because heaven).
Funny little guide that is actually surprisingly insightful and helpful for planning your funeral! If you're young and healthy, you might not be thinking about the possibility that you, too, will one day kick the bucket but even then it can be important for you to know what it is that you want... after.
I learned some interesting facts about death that I hadn't yet learned from the various other death books I've read, and the tone of the whole thing was light so it wasn't tough on my emotions.
I thought I had everything important planned out, but it turns out there's so much more to think about! For example, I have decided that the dress code for my funeral should be pyjamas & loungewear. Onesies are also acceptable.
I didn't care much for the worksheet aspect of the book. Instead, I used the prompts to update my funeral plan document in the Cloud (haha, because heaven).
April 2, 2021
Publish Date: August 16, 2021
Generally, people don't like to talk or even think about our own funerals. But it's such an important conversation to have and it doesn't have to be scary or depressing, as Kathy Benjamin so helpfully shows us in her book It's Your Funeral! This book is short and extremely readable, with moments that had me laughing out loud, and comes with blank pages to start outlining your ideas and plans for your funeral. I definitely think this is a good (and fun!) primer for funeral and death planning, and a good place to start when preparing to have those conversations with your friends and loved ones.
Thank you to Quirk Books and NetGalley for the review copy.
Generally, people don't like to talk or even think about our own funerals. But it's such an important conversation to have and it doesn't have to be scary or depressing, as Kathy Benjamin so helpfully shows us in her book It's Your Funeral! This book is short and extremely readable, with moments that had me laughing out loud, and comes with blank pages to start outlining your ideas and plans for your funeral. I definitely think this is a good (and fun!) primer for funeral and death planning, and a good place to start when preparing to have those conversations with your friends and loved ones.
Thank you to Quirk Books and NetGalley for the review copy.
May 9, 2021
Kathy Benjamin strikes precisely the right chord in this irreverent but helpful, hilarious yet instructional expert guide to funerals. From the historical basics to the fringe lunacy, from the nitty gritty costs, permits, and logistics to the very edges of wackadoo creative boundaries, this book covers everything on the subject. I especially appreciate her highlighting environmental impact; even if I'm disappointed to learn that standard cremation isn't an eco-friendly process, I have a number of sustainable options to choose from now. Comprehensive workbook-like assignments yield exactly what the book's subtitle promises, alongside fascinating facts (on everything from the duppy to the truth about Walt Whitman and that pesky cryogenic rumor) and wide ranging resources from readings to flowers.
My only challenge is her assertion that "Buddhist tradition expects pallbearers to eat a vegetarian diet and avoid alcohol for forty-nine days following the person's death" because I understood cremation to be the norm in Japan, and any cemetery there with bodies buried I thought were for foreigners who I'd presume to not be Buddhist.
Highly recommend! Thanks to Quirk Books and Edelweiss+ for the DRC, It's Your Funeral! will be available for purchase 17 August, 2021
My only challenge is her assertion that "Buddhist tradition expects pallbearers to eat a vegetarian diet and avoid alcohol for forty-nine days following the person's death" because I understood cremation to be the norm in Japan, and any cemetery there with bodies buried I thought were for foreigners who I'd presume to not be Buddhist.
Highly recommend! Thanks to Quirk Books and Edelweiss+ for the DRC, It's Your Funeral! will be available for purchase 17 August, 2021
October 12, 2022
Having read Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers (Mary Roach) not too much shocked me about this book but I loved the workbook style of it. Each chapter speaks to planning a different portion of your after party then lets you add notes, details, plans to reflect you. There is a whole section about planning a funeral event for before you actually die so that you can attend and that gave me pause- funerals can be expense and bring lots of people together so attending your own funeral could be fun! Next to weddings, Quinceañeras, and other costly events, funerals require a lot of thought and decisions during an already emotional time. Doing a lot of the work for you family before our demise is a generous way to share your love to your family.
Read
August 19, 2021All in all, IT'S YOUR FUNERAL! is a complete, non-depressing reference to end-of-life planning that every household should have and every person should read.
Read our full review here:
https://booktrib.com/2021/08/18/its-y...
Read our full review here:
https://booktrib.com/2021/08/18/its-y...
October 8, 2023
Ok, this is like the Craigslist version of Caitlin Doughty’s books, BUT I think it’s good for anyone just dippin’ their toes into the death positivity movement or anyone who’s just starting to think about what they want.
October 17, 2022
Informative, practical, and just the right amount of funny! I really enjoyed this, and will also use it to help me think about my (hopefully far in the future) funeral. An all-around win.
** I received a Review Copy of this book via NetGalley **
** I received a Review Copy of this book via NetGalley **
October 15, 2021
I LOVED this book! Once you get over the macabre, you realize how practical this really is. End of life planning can be fun - this book provided important information while keeping the subject light and funny. This book is essential, informative and quite the illuminating read for everyone.
February 1, 2022
No one likes talking about funerals or thinking about the death of loved ones, but these are topics we should be discussing more often. They certainly have been of late in Sophie’s family with some relatives recently sharing their decisions to pre-purchase cremation plans and others updating their wills. That’s why, when Sophie spotted It’s Your Funeral!: Plan the Celebration of a Lifetime—Before It’s Too Late by Kathy Benjamin she knew she had to read it. What she didn’t expect was for it to be laugh-out-loud funny!
It’s Your Funeral is a book that aims to “demystify death, decrease your anxiety, and put the fun back in funeral.” The brightly colored and fun (honestly) book looks at every aspect of funerals from ancient traditions to ideas so modern you’ve probably never heard of them—plastification and body farms anyone? It asks questions Sophie hadn’t even thought about such as which burial methods are the most eco-friendly, explores how to manage your digital legacy (and what you might want to think about protecting from sensitive eyes), and even invites you to think about what songs you’d like to have played at your funeral and the clothes you’d like to be buried in. For the record, if anyone tries to lay Sophie to rest wearing pantyhose—she’s coming back to haunt you. Speaking of hauntings, one page even offers tips on how best to plan for that if it’s a personal goal!
All throughout the book are work pages with space for you to write down your thoughts, ideas, and wishes. You can describe what you’d like done with your ashes (did you know that having them turned into tattoo ink, a vinyl record, or even a firework are all options?), list items you’d like to take with you to the great beyond and where you’d like them placed on your body, make a note of readings you’d like spoken and by whom, and even write your own epitaph and/or obituary. All throughout, the book encourages you to have fun—it’s YOUR funeral after all. Have you thought about what photos of you your loved ones might use for future obituaries or service sheets? Why not leave a folder on your computer titled “Photos Where I Look Super Hot to Use After I’m Dead” with some of your favorites in? Or why not request that your family form a flash mob and “perform an intricately choreographed interpretive dance to Adele’s Someone Like You every year on the anniversary of your death”? It’s really up to you!
This is a book that really got Sophie thinking. It’s one she would like to buy for several people she knows, but also feels slightly awkward about doing so—”Hey! Happy birthday! Here’s a book about planning your funeral…” For now, she’s working through several of the worksheets herself and making sure to talk to her family about her (and their) wishes. She recommends you do the same.
It’s Your Funeral is a book that aims to “demystify death, decrease your anxiety, and put the fun back in funeral.” The brightly colored and fun (honestly) book looks at every aspect of funerals from ancient traditions to ideas so modern you’ve probably never heard of them—plastification and body farms anyone? It asks questions Sophie hadn’t even thought about such as which burial methods are the most eco-friendly, explores how to manage your digital legacy (and what you might want to think about protecting from sensitive eyes), and even invites you to think about what songs you’d like to have played at your funeral and the clothes you’d like to be buried in. For the record, if anyone tries to lay Sophie to rest wearing pantyhose—she’s coming back to haunt you. Speaking of hauntings, one page even offers tips on how best to plan for that if it’s a personal goal!
All throughout the book are work pages with space for you to write down your thoughts, ideas, and wishes. You can describe what you’d like done with your ashes (did you know that having them turned into tattoo ink, a vinyl record, or even a firework are all options?), list items you’d like to take with you to the great beyond and where you’d like them placed on your body, make a note of readings you’d like spoken and by whom, and even write your own epitaph and/or obituary. All throughout, the book encourages you to have fun—it’s YOUR funeral after all. Have you thought about what photos of you your loved ones might use for future obituaries or service sheets? Why not leave a folder on your computer titled “Photos Where I Look Super Hot to Use After I’m Dead” with some of your favorites in? Or why not request that your family form a flash mob and “perform an intricately choreographed interpretive dance to Adele’s Someone Like You every year on the anniversary of your death”? It’s really up to you!
This is a book that really got Sophie thinking. It’s one she would like to buy for several people she knows, but also feels slightly awkward about doing so—”Hey! Happy birthday! Here’s a book about planning your funeral…” For now, she’s working through several of the worksheets herself and making sure to talk to her family about her (and their) wishes. She recommends you do the same.
August 14, 2021
Huge thanks to Quirk Books for an early advance copy for my honest review!
First of all, let's talk about this cover because nothing sums up this book better than this book. It's bright and fun, but at the same time has a pretty serious topic to discuss. I love books on death and funeral rites from all over the world and times. So I was really excited to crack into this one and see what I would find since a lot of this is about planning a future funeral. I have to say I wasn't sure what I was going to find between these pages, but I wasn't disappointed.
Next, let's get something out of the way. This book was fun! Yes, I know this book wants you to think about your own death, and what will happen after. A topic most people would rather avoid, but this book does it in a way that doesn't take itself too seriously. Kathy Benjamin gives you a wide variety of ways to pass one. Some are more attainable than others. But I mean you should always keep your options open, even in death.
I think my favorite part about this book is the work pages that pop up throughout the book. They are a good way to get your thoughts down on paper, explore your options, make lists, and start thinking about everything. Those pages and the information in between are both a great tool to think about what you want, what will help your family and friends with the aftermath, and make things as smooth as possible.
Even I started filling some of the pages out at the beginning of the book. Though, as the book went on I did find it harder and harder to feel out the pages. How did I want to split up my personal belongings? Where I would be living at the time? Those pages raised other questions, and while I'm nowhere no worried about making my mind up now. It did put a few things in my mind that I hadn't thought about.
But, like a said before this book doesn't think too much of itself. Kathy Benjamin comes out with the topic of your death, of everyone's death, with a little bit of humor. There's a bit of tongue and cheek, a bit of sass, and a lot of the outrageous things people have done after they've (or loved ones) have passed. And, not all of these people are famous. Some are just regular people who wanted to make an impression even after death.
So whether your like me and like books that are macabre and unusual, or you just want to see what your options are after death. I suggest Kath Benjamin's It's Your Funeral! It's officially on shelves today!
This review, and other bookish posts, can be found on my blog Bookish Whispers!
First of all, let's talk about this cover because nothing sums up this book better than this book. It's bright and fun, but at the same time has a pretty serious topic to discuss. I love books on death and funeral rites from all over the world and times. So I was really excited to crack into this one and see what I would find since a lot of this is about planning a future funeral. I have to say I wasn't sure what I was going to find between these pages, but I wasn't disappointed.
Next, let's get something out of the way. This book was fun! Yes, I know this book wants you to think about your own death, and what will happen after. A topic most people would rather avoid, but this book does it in a way that doesn't take itself too seriously. Kathy Benjamin gives you a wide variety of ways to pass one. Some are more attainable than others. But I mean you should always keep your options open, even in death.
I think my favorite part about this book is the work pages that pop up throughout the book. They are a good way to get your thoughts down on paper, explore your options, make lists, and start thinking about everything. Those pages and the information in between are both a great tool to think about what you want, what will help your family and friends with the aftermath, and make things as smooth as possible.
Even I started filling some of the pages out at the beginning of the book. Though, as the book went on I did find it harder and harder to feel out the pages. How did I want to split up my personal belongings? Where I would be living at the time? Those pages raised other questions, and while I'm nowhere no worried about making my mind up now. It did put a few things in my mind that I hadn't thought about.
But, like a said before this book doesn't think too much of itself. Kathy Benjamin comes out with the topic of your death, of everyone's death, with a little bit of humor. There's a bit of tongue and cheek, a bit of sass, and a lot of the outrageous things people have done after they've (or loved ones) have passed. And, not all of these people are famous. Some are just regular people who wanted to make an impression even after death.
So whether your like me and like books that are macabre and unusual, or you just want to see what your options are after death. I suggest Kath Benjamin's It's Your Funeral! It's officially on shelves today!
This review, and other bookish posts, can be found on my blog Bookish Whispers!
November 10, 2021
[3.5 stars] A humorous attempt at reframing funeral celebration and body disposition planning. This book has been all over the death doula and end-of-life care corner of social media I’m in, so I decided to give it a try. I think it could be a useful conversation starter for some people, especially those who assume they’ll have a longer-than-average life expectancy, or a die from a chronic condition that allows for pre-death planning. I appreciated the wide overview of options for bodily disposition (often what folks have the most questions about and are least likely to get a full range of clear answers from a corporate funeral home-based mortician on) and that there were useful worksheets scattered throughout to help readers process and pre-plan. That said, I wasn’t a huge fan of the overall tone and how disconnected it felt from non-dominant culture and identity in the U.S.; even the brief mentions of death traditions from other countries felt like exoticism and othering. I’ve found books written from a careworker perspective (death doula, hospice volunteer, death-positive funeral director, or similar) to be more relevant to my own approach and communities, and often better at acknowledging the privilege (completely absent here) of “a good death”.
Goodreads Challenge: 51/60
Goodreads Challenge: 51/60
June 30, 2024
I went into this book under the impression that it was going to be a workbook to help me plan my funeral—which, as it turns out, I don't even want upon my death, and this book made me remember that. Instead, it was a hodgepodge of history, information about death rituals, and paltry writing space to plan your actual funeral. It would have been better separated into a book and then an accompanying workbook. Also Kathy Benjamin's writing, while intended to be humorous (and sometimes it really was), was extremely judgmental of other disposition options besides burial and cremation, and for a book that purports to want to tip the conversation into the public's hands about funeral and death care, that seemed like a huge problem to me.
Anyway, still working out my own end-of-life options, but Benjamin at least made me decide definitively that I do not want a funeral, that is, any sort of celebration of life in my honor. I can't control what people do after my death, so gather together if you'd like. But all of these minute details seemed largely irrelevant besides the actual body disposition. Anything other that seems unnecessary.
Anyway, still working out my own end-of-life options, but Benjamin at least made me decide definitively that I do not want a funeral, that is, any sort of celebration of life in my honor. I can't control what people do after my death, so gather together if you'd like. But all of these minute details seemed largely irrelevant besides the actual body disposition. Anything other that seems unnecessary.
September 21, 2022
Not a lot new here if you read C. Dougherty books.
But some of the obscure funeral rituals and epitaphs were fun.
I'm a little unsure of how many people are up for a fun, jokey book about preplanning your funeral, but this one touches on a lot of the contemporary things that are available as options. (Mushroom burial, mulching, fireworks.). I kind of love the lady who offers to stand at a distance at your funeral, holding a black umbrella regardless of the weather, so everyone will know you died with a dark and tragic secret.
For a more sober look, if you got a terminal diagnosis, say, you might want "Advice for Future Corpses."
Also, author seems pretty grossed out by the fact that the goop from water cremation gets dumped down the drain, but seems to plug embalming. Where do you think the fluids from embalming go?
(A: Down the drain.)
If you're morbid but like death jokes, or just want to do your family the service of not having to rush around in the week after your death trying to think of the things you actually liked-- this might be a book for you.
But some of the obscure funeral rituals and epitaphs were fun.
I'm a little unsure of how many people are up for a fun, jokey book about preplanning your funeral, but this one touches on a lot of the contemporary things that are available as options. (Mushroom burial, mulching, fireworks.). I kind of love the lady who offers to stand at a distance at your funeral, holding a black umbrella regardless of the weather, so everyone will know you died with a dark and tragic secret.
For a more sober look, if you got a terminal diagnosis, say, you might want "Advice for Future Corpses."
Also, author seems pretty grossed out by the fact that the goop from water cremation gets dumped down the drain, but seems to plug embalming. Where do you think the fluids from embalming go?
(A: Down the drain.)
If you're morbid but like death jokes, or just want to do your family the service of not having to rush around in the week after your death trying to think of the things you actually liked-- this might be a book for you.
August 30, 2021
Thank you to Quirk Press for sending me an advance copy of this title!
As the owner of an indie bookshop specializing in strange fiction, the occult and folklore, my customers have a higher-than-usual interest in death. This title strikes the perfect balance between morbid and approachable, covering the realities of funeral planning in an information-rich, straightforward tone with just the right dash of humor. I love that this book includes worksheets -- it would be too easy easy to just think about these things, call it a day and not actually put pen to paper.
I do think this title is best suited to Americans with little to no cultural customs of their own about death and grieving. It may be a bit scary for folks gleefully ignoring their eventual demise, but it strikes a great tone for those who have begun to consider it. I look forward to stocking this in the shop, especially with such a great cover!
As the owner of an indie bookshop specializing in strange fiction, the occult and folklore, my customers have a higher-than-usual interest in death. This title strikes the perfect balance between morbid and approachable, covering the realities of funeral planning in an information-rich, straightforward tone with just the right dash of humor. I love that this book includes worksheets -- it would be too easy easy to just think about these things, call it a day and not actually put pen to paper.
I do think this title is best suited to Americans with little to no cultural customs of their own about death and grieving. It may be a bit scary for folks gleefully ignoring their eventual demise, but it strikes a great tone for those who have begun to consider it. I look forward to stocking this in the shop, especially with such a great cover!
August 17, 2021
It's Your Funeral! by Kathy Benjamin was a bizarre and pretty book.
This was such an interactive book. With worksheets and really good information. it made me really think about my own and how I want it to be.
This book covers everything one needs to know, and the author keeps insisting that some things may be different in other countries so if the readers don’t live in the united states, then they can find out how it's done in their own country.
I really liked this book. People don’t like to talk about their own funeral, but you can plan it anytime you want and even have blast planning it. This book tells you everything, from the costs, logistics, permits to differences between cremation or burial.
This was such an interactive book. With worksheets and really good information. it made me really think about my own and how I want it to be.
This book covers everything one needs to know, and the author keeps insisting that some things may be different in other countries so if the readers don’t live in the united states, then they can find out how it's done in their own country.
I really liked this book. People don’t like to talk about their own funeral, but you can plan it anytime you want and even have blast planning it. This book tells you everything, from the costs, logistics, permits to differences between cremation or burial.
November 15, 2021
How do you want your funeral?
I'm not asking your last wish, you can pre-plan your funeral aforesaid to your children and relatives. It's your funeral is the book where you're informed so many things related to funeral and what can be the usage of your body, ashes and all the details regarding how funeral is an attentive ceremony for many!
It might be scary and saddest thing to discuss, yet it's equally satisfying when you've already celebrated.
Book contain curious facts, strange stories, and inspiration to help you think outside the coffin. It's your funeral and last moment of your precious life. 💯 demands celebration.
A must read for everyone. This book actually demands attention and quite underrated. Highly recommend !
I'm not asking your last wish, you can pre-plan your funeral aforesaid to your children and relatives. It's your funeral is the book where you're informed so many things related to funeral and what can be the usage of your body, ashes and all the details regarding how funeral is an attentive ceremony for many!
It might be scary and saddest thing to discuss, yet it's equally satisfying when you've already celebrated.
Book contain curious facts, strange stories, and inspiration to help you think outside the coffin. It's your funeral and last moment of your precious life. 💯 demands celebration.
A must read for everyone. This book actually demands attention and quite underrated. Highly recommend !
September 1, 2021
The author manages to keep the topic of funerals (and death in general) light hearted and informative.
Admittedly I only read the first half. And as well as it was written, I didn't find the topic interesting enough to carry on.
The book is packed with great ideas to livin the occasion up, like having a themed dress code or venue. And plenty of reminders about the legal stuff like permits for things like NOT burying cremains at a cemetery. As well as some funny stories like what celebs have been buried with.
I'd recommend, if your vaguely interested in planning a funeral.
Admittedly I only read the first half. And as well as it was written, I didn't find the topic interesting enough to carry on.
The book is packed with great ideas to livin the occasion up, like having a themed dress code or venue. And plenty of reminders about the legal stuff like permits for things like NOT burying cremains at a cemetery. As well as some funny stories like what celebs have been buried with.
I'd recommend, if your vaguely interested in planning a funeral.
January 14, 2022
This book includes a description of many ways to dispose of your body after you're gone -- and to take control now in specifying what you'd like done with your body, how to celebrate your life, and help your family know what you want to be done when you die.
My will specifies what is to be done with my body -- but I do think picking out photos, songs, etc. now and later for my memorial might be a nice thing to do. I struggled to think of my mom's favorite songs and it would have been nice to have talked to her about them before she passed to include in her memorial.
My will specifies what is to be done with my body -- but I do think picking out photos, songs, etc. now and later for my memorial might be a nice thing to do. I struggled to think of my mom's favorite songs and it would have been nice to have talked to her about them before she passed to include in her memorial.
March 3, 2026
4.5 ⭐
This was such a brilliant, unexpectedly funny read. It dives into topics most of us tend to avoid thinking about, let alone talking about, but it does it in a way that feels thoughtful rather than heavy. I loved how it explored different death customs and funeral options from various perspectives. It was genuinely insightful without ever feeling overwhelming.
I’d definitely recommend picking this one up. And if you’re into audiobooks, the audio version is fantastic and really brings the tone to life.
This was such a brilliant, unexpectedly funny read. It dives into topics most of us tend to avoid thinking about, let alone talking about, but it does it in a way that feels thoughtful rather than heavy. I loved how it explored different death customs and funeral options from various perspectives. It was genuinely insightful without ever feeling overwhelming.
I’d definitely recommend picking this one up. And if you’re into audiobooks, the audio version is fantastic and really brings the tone to life.
July 27, 2021
It’s the one conversation we should all have with our nearest and dearest. At the end of the day it means you get the send off you want.
This is a fun little book. Told in a light hearted way what us a sensitive subject. Personally I like the idea of a mushroom suit myself. There are sections in the book for you to make your own notes.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to see an arc of this book.
This is a fun little book. Told in a light hearted way what us a sensitive subject. Personally I like the idea of a mushroom suit myself. There are sections in the book for you to make your own notes.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to see an arc of this book.
September 18, 2021
Disclosure: I've known the author personally and professionally for a decade ever since we were freelancers at Cracked.
But you don't have to be the author's friend to be delighted by this book. A workbook for planning out your passing, it's funny and features fun facts while sensibly laying out what you, while alive, should do now so that when you become dead, it's not a sh*tshow. Informative, thought provoking and well worth reading.
But you don't have to be the author's friend to be delighted by this book. A workbook for planning out your passing, it's funny and features fun facts while sensibly laying out what you, while alive, should do now so that when you become dead, it's not a sh*tshow. Informative, thought provoking and well worth reading.
February 16, 2022
It’s Your Funeral by Kathy Benjamin is a well-written, positive guide to helping people be aware and cope with planning for the eventuality of our deaths. So many people are caught unawares when a loved one (or a distant friend/relation) parse away and we have to cope with not only our emotions but the stress of planning a funeral or memorial service. Highly recommended for anyone who it looking for guidance.
Thanks to Quirk Books for the preview copy.
Thanks to Quirk Books for the preview copy.
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