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Mergers and Acquisitions
A delightfully warm, witty and poignant memoir about falling in love, and an eye-opening behind-the scenes tour of the rarified world of The New York Times weddings pages - from the good and the bad to the just plain weird.
Growing up in America's romantic south, where tradition reigns supreme, Cate Doty thought about weddings a lot. So when she moves to New York City in pursuit of love, and to write for The New York Times, she finds her natural home in the pages of the wedding section, one of the Big Apple's most esteemed, talked-about - and competitive - institutions.
Soon Cate is thrown into the cut-throat world of the New York marriage market, experiencing the lengths society couples go to have their announcements accepted and the lengths the writers go in fact-checking their stories; the eye-opening, status-signaling details that matter most to brides and grooms; and the politics of the paper at a time of vast cultural and industry changes.
Cate is surrounded by love, or what we're told to believe is love. But when she falls head over heels herself, she begins to ask her own questions about what it means to truly commit . . .
Equal parts charming, addictive and funny, this is a delightful meditation on love, privilege and the human condition, and a young reporter's own romantic coming of age.
Growing up in America's romantic south, where tradition reigns supreme, Cate Doty thought about weddings a lot. So when she moves to New York City in pursuit of love, and to write for The New York Times, she finds her natural home in the pages of the wedding section, one of the Big Apple's most esteemed, talked-about - and competitive - institutions.
Soon Cate is thrown into the cut-throat world of the New York marriage market, experiencing the lengths society couples go to have their announcements accepted and the lengths the writers go in fact-checking their stories; the eye-opening, status-signaling details that matter most to brides and grooms; and the politics of the paper at a time of vast cultural and industry changes.
Cate is surrounded by love, or what we're told to believe is love. But when she falls head over heels herself, she begins to ask her own questions about what it means to truly commit . . .
Equal parts charming, addictive and funny, this is a delightful meditation on love, privilege and the human condition, and a young reporter's own romantic coming of age.
282 pages, Kindle Edition
Published January 5, 2022
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
January 23, 2022
This is the blurb that sells this book:
“A compulsively readable behind-the-scenes memoir that takes readers inside the weddings section of the New York Times--the good, bad, and just plain weird--through the eyes of a young reporter just as she's falling in love herself.”
I started out by saying that I am enjoying this book. The tales of the author’s childhood are interesting. Maybe I like it because I know nothing of America other than what I read in books. Stories about families, the eccentricities, the viciousness, the kindness, the whole growing-up thing is like getting to know new people.
“A weird teenager who knew how to set the table for a state dinner, dreamed of fingertip veils, and had decided opinions on silver patterns?” Yes, that was her.
“… a wedding is hope. It is tradition, decorum, and a door into life itself.”
A wedding between the upper echelons of society was “a family merger … that consolidated social, political, and academic power between families.”
The author’s recap of her love life is tender, well-observed and feels authentic. By the end of her first real relationship, she feels that “they kept on being nice, like two old married people refusing to jump ship because of the kids.”
A chapter on wedding movies, dissecting them in the light of female autonomy and consideration of the anatomy of marriage is quite fun. Marriage and divorce statistics are analysed. However, the author feels that “the supremacy of the wedding and the fairy tale still exist, even if we’re on the fourth wave of feminism.”
Social media has democratized the announcement of marriages. The # now rules. She observes the much-married Salman Rushdie as saying “Girls want a wedding, they don’t want a marriage. If only you could have weddings without the marriage.”
The Vows column was a public portrayal of a relationship. “What was the thing that made them thrill to each other each dawn in the kitchen, unkempt with morning breath, or drew them back to center after a knock-down, drag-out fight that made the neighbors worried?” For marriage and weddings, this to the author was “the whole damn point”.
The dichotomy of reporting about people in the lowest of social strata while wearing cashmere. The author comments on social disparity and gender and race discrimination but does not apply this to her own coverage of stories.
The blurb may say something, but maybe this is a love letter to New York, an exploration of adult relationships and a real coming of age story.
The narrative is anti-racist, anti-sexist, anti-discrimination, feminist, egalitarian, etc. And then reveals a history of privilege and then tries to prove their universality. She is not really who she presents. She may not take her Mayflower ancestors seriously, but it is important to her identity. This is demonstrated by the detail Doty goes into.
I think this book has been promoted as one thing, but it is much more complex and reviews to date have not really engaged with the book as it is. It really does not engage in the probably banal nature of marital announcements. The author endows them with a significance that appeals to a particular groups of people.
At about halfway, I got tired of this book. Was it a memoir? Was it a commentary on social norms? I do not know and by the end did not care.
“A compulsively readable behind-the-scenes memoir that takes readers inside the weddings section of the New York Times--the good, bad, and just plain weird--through the eyes of a young reporter just as she's falling in love herself.”
I started out by saying that I am enjoying this book. The tales of the author’s childhood are interesting. Maybe I like it because I know nothing of America other than what I read in books. Stories about families, the eccentricities, the viciousness, the kindness, the whole growing-up thing is like getting to know new people.
“A weird teenager who knew how to set the table for a state dinner, dreamed of fingertip veils, and had decided opinions on silver patterns?” Yes, that was her.
“… a wedding is hope. It is tradition, decorum, and a door into life itself.”
A wedding between the upper echelons of society was “a family merger … that consolidated social, political, and academic power between families.”
The author’s recap of her love life is tender, well-observed and feels authentic. By the end of her first real relationship, she feels that “they kept on being nice, like two old married people refusing to jump ship because of the kids.”
A chapter on wedding movies, dissecting them in the light of female autonomy and consideration of the anatomy of marriage is quite fun. Marriage and divorce statistics are analysed. However, the author feels that “the supremacy of the wedding and the fairy tale still exist, even if we’re on the fourth wave of feminism.”
Social media has democratized the announcement of marriages. The # now rules. She observes the much-married Salman Rushdie as saying “Girls want a wedding, they don’t want a marriage. If only you could have weddings without the marriage.”
The Vows column was a public portrayal of a relationship. “What was the thing that made them thrill to each other each dawn in the kitchen, unkempt with morning breath, or drew them back to center after a knock-down, drag-out fight that made the neighbors worried?” For marriage and weddings, this to the author was “the whole damn point”.
The dichotomy of reporting about people in the lowest of social strata while wearing cashmere. The author comments on social disparity and gender and race discrimination but does not apply this to her own coverage of stories.
The blurb may say something, but maybe this is a love letter to New York, an exploration of adult relationships and a real coming of age story.
The narrative is anti-racist, anti-sexist, anti-discrimination, feminist, egalitarian, etc. And then reveals a history of privilege and then tries to prove their universality. She is not really who she presents. She may not take her Mayflower ancestors seriously, but it is important to her identity. This is demonstrated by the detail Doty goes into.
I think this book has been promoted as one thing, but it is much more complex and reviews to date have not really engaged with the book as it is. It really does not engage in the probably banal nature of marital announcements. The author endows them with a significance that appeals to a particular groups of people.
At about halfway, I got tired of this book. Was it a memoir? Was it a commentary on social norms? I do not know and by the end did not care.
February 11, 2022
I love a good memoir, reading about someone’s life is always of interest to me.
I struggled with this book. The author’s recollections and life story was readable but wasn’t as gripping as I expected.
The storyline should have shown more of the romance and was perhaps not what I was hoping for!
Thank you to Cate Doty, Harper Collins and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and give an honest review of this book.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
I struggled with this book. The author’s recollections and life story was readable but wasn’t as gripping as I expected.
The storyline should have shown more of the romance and was perhaps not what I was hoping for!
Thank you to Cate Doty, Harper Collins and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and give an honest review of this book.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
July 24, 2024
The book was an interesting look into weddings, their history, and meaning. However, it felt disjointed and didn't go in the direction I was expecting. It was more about the author than the couples she wrote about for her column which was a little disappointing to me. Still entertaining!
I also felt like the ending was not necessary and felt extremely rushed and not super related to the book. Could have just ended after her wedding
I also felt like the ending was not necessary and felt extremely rushed and not super related to the book. Could have just ended after her wedding
December 14, 2022
Cate Doty's Mergers and Acquisitions is thoroughly enjoyable and refreshingly different. What a fascinating insight into the world of New York weddings. A unique and intriguing read, would highly recommend!!
May 3, 2022
- thanks to @harpercollinsaustralia for my #gifted copy
As usual, I did not know anything about this book or the author before I picked it up. As a person who does not believe in the institution of marriage, I was not too interested in learning about the history of The New York Times wedding pages, but, also as usual, I could not walk away from an unrequested book that magically showed up at my door.
I must admit that what I enjoyed most about Mergers and Acquisitions was when the author delves into her personal life outside work, or, more specifically, her job covering weddings. Doty's stories about her romantic relationships were definitely entertaining, and I genuinely appreciated the honesty, authenticity, and tenderness of her tone when reliving the good and the bad from each relationship, including all she learned from a broken heart.
I also enjoyed the coming-of-age storyline, when Doty focuses on the beginning of her career as a young woman back in the '90s, trying to make her dreams come true in the challenging world of publishing in New York. I was moved by the struggles and difficulties she faced while finding her place in the world. Some of her stories deeply resonated with me, as I can understand what it is like to move far from home to pursue a crazy and unbelievable dream.
However, I did not enjoy the author's continuous commentary on social issues nor the drama around the couples who thought it would be a good idea to announce their marriage in a newspaper. Every single time a newspaper marriage anecdote came up, I tuned out immediately. This is obviously no one's fault because it is a personal preference: I simply do not care about celebrities, let alone who is marrying who.
Unfortunately, this book is mainly about matters that I truly do not care about, so my rating has more to do with preference than anything else.
Overall, Mergers and Acquisitions is an entertaining memoir, ideal for those who enjoy reading about the privileged classes. Sadly, it does not explore the intricacies of marriage per se, which would have made it an impactful memoir.
As usual, I did not know anything about this book or the author before I picked it up. As a person who does not believe in the institution of marriage, I was not too interested in learning about the history of The New York Times wedding pages, but, also as usual, I could not walk away from an unrequested book that magically showed up at my door.
I must admit that what I enjoyed most about Mergers and Acquisitions was when the author delves into her personal life outside work, or, more specifically, her job covering weddings. Doty's stories about her romantic relationships were definitely entertaining, and I genuinely appreciated the honesty, authenticity, and tenderness of her tone when reliving the good and the bad from each relationship, including all she learned from a broken heart.
I also enjoyed the coming-of-age storyline, when Doty focuses on the beginning of her career as a young woman back in the '90s, trying to make her dreams come true in the challenging world of publishing in New York. I was moved by the struggles and difficulties she faced while finding her place in the world. Some of her stories deeply resonated with me, as I can understand what it is like to move far from home to pursue a crazy and unbelievable dream.
However, I did not enjoy the author's continuous commentary on social issues nor the drama around the couples who thought it would be a good idea to announce their marriage in a newspaper. Every single time a newspaper marriage anecdote came up, I tuned out immediately. This is obviously no one's fault because it is a personal preference: I simply do not care about celebrities, let alone who is marrying who.
Unfortunately, this book is mainly about matters that I truly do not care about, so my rating has more to do with preference than anything else.
Overall, Mergers and Acquisitions is an entertaining memoir, ideal for those who enjoy reading about the privileged classes. Sadly, it does not explore the intricacies of marriage per se, which would have made it an impactful memoir.
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews