Fit to Serve: Reflections on a Secret Life, Private Struggle, and Public Battle to Become the First Openly Gay U.S. Ambassador

by James C. Hormel

This is the memoir of James C. Hormel—a man who grew up feeling different not only because his family owned the Hormel “empire” and lived in a twenty-six-bedroom house in a small Midwest town, but because he was gay at a time when homosexuality was not discussed or accepted. Outwardly he tried to live up to the life his father wanted for him—he was a successful professional, had married a lovely woman, and had children—but as vola-tile changes in the late 1960s impeded on the American psyche, Hormel realized that he could not hide his true self forever.

Hormel moved to New York City, became an antiwar activist, battled homophobia, lost dear friends to AIDS, and set out to become America’s first openly gay ambassador, a position he finally won during the Clinton administration. Today, Hormel continues to fight for LGBT equality and gay marriage rights. This is a passionate and inspiring true story of the determination for human equality and for attaining your own version of the American Dream—life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness without exception.

Genres: Memoir, Gay, Politics, Biography, History, Nonfiction, Audiobook

Audible Audio

First published October 11, 2011

Reviews

[Denise · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's always encouraging to remember how far we've come on the road to equality in the past quarter of a century. Whereas today a gay man being appointed a US ambassador hardly so much as raises eyebrows anywhere other than among the exceptionally bigoted, the first such appointment in the 90s provoked a protracted battle and smear campaign. Hormel's life story up to that point too makes for an interesting read. I see quite a few reviewers complaining about his wealthy and privileged background - so what? Yes, he surely would have faced far greater struggles and a vastly different set of problems had he come from a poorer family, but that doesn't make his life less worth telling about.

[Koren · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had never heard of James Hormel before reading this book, even though his hometown is only 60 miles from mine. I have heard of his family business, Hormel, who's most famous product is Spam. James and his brothers were expected to go into the family business but none of them did. James talks quite a bit about his growing up years in 40's Minnesota, where he always felt like he didnt fit in and didnt acknowledge his homosexuality until after he had a family and 5 children. He did eventually except himself the way he was and spent quite a bit of his life fighting for gay rights. For some reason which he really doesn't elaborate on, he sets his sights on an ambassador to Luxembourgh, even though he had no prior political experience. The last third of the book he describes his fight to get that ambassadorship, being appointed by President Clinton. He feels that there was a lot of discrimination against him because of his sexuality, which I'm sure is true, but I wonder if it also was because of his inexperience in politics. It would be interesting to know if the other appointees that got the job before him had more experience but he doesn't touch on this. I would have liked him to be more open about his personal relationships, especially with his children. I also wanted to know more about what an ambassador to Luxembourgh actually does. He barely touches on this. Did anyone actually know this was a thing? This was an interesting book, but at times seemed to drag.

[UChicagoLaw]

"First, Fit to Serve is authored by our alumnus and former Dean of Students Jim Hormel, ‘58. Jim’s book is a very interesting personal memoir of his life culminating in the controversy surrounding his appointment as the first openly gay American ambassador to a foreign nation." -Michael Schill

[Mediaman · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is just another propaganda "memoir" from a rich liberal elitist. It skips vast number of years and life stories in order to instead pretend that Hormel suffered for being gay. In reality the guy grew up extremely rich in a home with over 25 bedrooms and bathrooms, was a lazy student who got bad grades, went periods of time doing nothing other than sinking his inheritance money into super liberal candidates, and wore his sexual choices on his sleeve. There is no evidence in the book of him ever being bullied or hurt by his sexual choices, and he bought his way up the Democratic power chain. Though he doesn't seem to understand it, his friendships all surrounded him being rich and ultimately he donated enough that President Clinton made him an ambassador, though there's no evidence that he was qualified or intelligent enough for the job.

The only interesting thing about the book is to see how quickly he changed from a conservative Republican to an off-the-deep-end liberal. It happened after his divorce when he began living with men. He had a wife and five kids before the marriage went sour, with Hormel sneaking around on his wife. Then, he says, by simply reading a magazine article he decided to change his life and go public. So he can't keep a commitment, lies without conscience, and puts his wife in danger by bringing home potential sexual diseases...but he's to be praised for coming out? Great candidate for "public service" right? Instead of him becoming introspective about his own hypocrisy and bad choices, he blames it on society repressing his sexuality. In truth he could have done whatever he wanted behind closed doors, but once he divorced and came out at about age 34, he decided to try to force his beliefs on the rest of the country by funding radical groups in the Democratic party.

There's little about the Hormel family from small Austin, Minnesota (though we've all been pronouncing the company name wrong, with the emphasis on the first syllable instead!). He barely mentions college, law school, his kids, and even the guys he slept with. If you're looking for a tell-all this isn't it. If you like typical Democratic propaganda, then it's perfect for you. It's non-stop at making false anti-Republican claims, a distorted view of how a rich elitist liberal that has everything views the world.

The lesson of the book is that money buys you power in a political party. That being raised by rich parents who have little to do with you causes you to hunger for love and you look for it by using your money to go where you want and be with who you desire. He never truly struggled, and that despite what he claims his sexuality really didn't cause him much suffering other than picking which club to go to each night. If Hormel expects any sympathy he won't get it from writing this book, which exposes the hypocrisy of the Democrat party and "public servants."

[Todd Cheng · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was doing research about diplomacy. The title is misleading. He is a very lucky and elite American who was gifted a title for much political contributions. And yes he is gay. Yes he struggled a dang lot to gain the position and grateful he persisted and got success. About 30 percent of the positions are filled annually by political appointment. The US is the only modern country to do this and in many ways it is corrupt to both the institution and the tax payer. Much tax payer resources go into the appointments and the value to US interests is questionable. However, human rights is a great investment in a civilized world and Mr. Hormel deeply cares about that investment.

He is not the first gay male or female in US Diplomacy and some of the other past struggles through the McCarthy season or scarlet are more painful. A persons sexuality should not be a professional struggle. Hard to read the pains he had. Harder to read people who work and cumulate 27+ years in the tradecraft being sideline due to their sexuality or politics.

Once I recognized the topic was off what I expect I went ahead and read the memoir as I had never read one of a man coming out or the politics of appointing. It was an okay read. Interesting peek at the American 1 percent as not a group I experience.

He used his wealth and elite positions to help broader awareness of the importance of equality. And he wrote about those lessons and struggles.

Good that he wrote it and overall a good investment in gaining perspective on the topic.

[Linda Spyhalski · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was my read for Pride Month. This was published 2011. The author James C. Hormel is the grandson of the founders of Hormel located In Austin, Mn. A little of his families history, his early knowledge of being different, college, a marriage and five children , and then the reality of his being gay. His coming out and spending his life fighting for equal rights for himself and others. Yes, he was the first openly Gay U.S. Ambassador to Luxembourg. A very enlightening read of the struggle of those early fighters against the hate and untruths that followed them. It also speaks to the sadness and loss of lives as AIDS swept through the country. I highly recommend this book!

[Ishan · Rating 4 out of 5]

A nice book. Very informative. I knew of him as Amb. to Luxembourg, but I had no idea that he was one of the founders of HRC. The political diffuculties of having him confirmed and the 'putting a hold on it' by someone, is rings of today, Just goes to show that a certain set of people have been hard headed and close-minded twenty five years ago, as they are today. Should certainly be read for an overview, but then I missed details. I crave details within a biography, and it is true, that a number of thins were 'just mentioned' without going into them as it should.

[Jerry · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm alternating between fiction and nonfiction and this came up as a recommendation on Audible. It starts with the demonizing of gay people by US Senators. Quite a dramatic opening. He then takes you on his life story. Obviously privileged being born into wealth, but somehow his family instilled in him the notions that you have to give back. I found it pretty interesting especially due to the vast number of people he knows from all segments of society.

[David Torgerson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this. Easy to read and honest. Learning about growing up in an upper class family and feeling the pressure not only to take over the company (Hormel), but also to have to suppress his gay feelings. I recall all the controversy over him being the 1st out gay ambassador and the Republican hypocrites that prevented him for a long time. I highly recommend this book to anyone just learning about the struggle us gay people have had in the '50's and beyond.

[Stuart Miller · Rating 3 out of 5]

To my mind, the most interesting part of this memoir is the author's recounting of his life before he came out--which involved a marriage and several children, a rather poignant story that is shared by far too many men of his generation.

[Cato · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting view into the life of a privileged white man, who did a lot for gay people in the USA. Definitely made me want to get more involved in activism in my community!

[John · Rating 4 out of 5]

I wonder why I remember so little about Hormel's ambassadorship... I guess my news news sources weren't that interested?

[Lisa Carlson · Rating 5 out of 5]

With the recent overturning of Clinton's Defense of Marriage Act it can only mean a special joyous moment for the many, many gay men and women who have lived in isolation; this story reminded of how they must have felt for so long. James Hormel grew up in Austin, Minnesota in an eccentric family and grand home. He describes the smell of the famous Hormel plant, meeting Oscar Meyer and how he began to feel attracted to the same sex. His story describes how he married, had children and still felt ashamed about carrying on with his secret gay life. There are some touching photos included in this memoir and we get a sense near the end Hormel has finally found peace. Some would lament his upper middle class family shielded him from many of the discomforts of admitting his sexuality but I don't think so. Let's remember the United States has a long embarrassing history of abusive civil rights and demeaning gay people is the new civil rights issue of our time. We should still be embarrassed. James Hormel is an elegant advocate we can all admire on so many levels.

[willowdog · Rating 2 out of 5]

The story of James Hormel is a look in how one who is "different" (as in gay and extremely wealthy) attempts to find a life of meaning and fulfillment and to make a difference. The memoir of growing up in some town Minnesota in the 30's, WWII, having the successful beard of wife and children in the 50's, his activist 60's, his involvement and support of LGBT rights and AIDS, and his seven year struggle to become the first openly gay ambassador porvide an incite into these times and the United States political system. Issues with the book were that I wanted more about the loves of his life-we are kept at bay. But I did enjoy the small movements of the times as they were personal memoirs for me. United Federalist, est, Stop AIDS

[Bryn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Personally, I wasn't given much of a choice whether or not to read this book. It was kind of required for summer reading for a rising senior like myself. Upon reading the first few pages, I felt like I was living alongside Mr. Hormel, experiencing his journey through adversity alongside him. When I saw it was 300 plus pages, I was a little taken aback and thought it was going to be a drag of read, but I found Mr. Hormel's journey to be fascinating. This was probably the only summer reading book I thoroughly enjoyed. Not much of a helpful review about plot or anything but for a 17-year-old girl not very fascinated in literature and novels, I enjoyed Fit to Serve.

[Thorn MotherIssues · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't think I've really read a memoir from a gay rights activist who worked within the system rather than mostly outside it, and this is interesting on that front. Also good on the kind of cultural change that's happened for the US gay community from the '50s ('40s?) to now. Toss in discussion of privilege and political change, and this is both an easy-to-read memoir and a polemic about coming out and being accepted.

[Flowerdreaming · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reading about the historical struggle of a gay man in today's society is aligned with wealth & privilege. I wonder what like would have been like if he was poor or working class?!? Very interesting to read and reflect on society & the changes that I have seen in gay & lesbian life.

[Rod · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a great book. Interesting life but no big accomplishments to dramatize in a biography.

[Walt · Rating 5 out of 5]

a very good read . proud of what he has done.

[Tim · Rating 3 out of 5]

Better than I anticipated. Funny how preconceived notions and ideas are not always true. But then there were a number of opinions that were strengthened with the reading also.