I enjoyed this book at a five star level for much of the read, but the last 100 pages were a struggle. The main problem I had with this book was that I couldn’t help but want to know how much of it was autobiographical and how much was fiction.
I googled River Adams but couldn’t find much about their family or health. So it was hard to tell how much of the final chapters of the book was based on reality. To me, this made a big difference in my ability to enjoy it. Was I reading a true-life drama/tragedy? Or the fruits of the imagination of a gifted story teller?
Also, I was unfairly interested in the author’s choice of pronouns stated in their bio. Since the book seemed to be so autobiographical in nature, I felt that at some juncture, they might share some mild indication of what motivated them to identify as non-binary. But that revelation never comes. It shouldn’t matter. But I was disappointed to find that this important part of their personal story wasn’t included in what seemed at times like a memoir.
My rating, if the book had ended on a higher note, would have been five stars, but the story just seemed to crumble quickly and mercilessly toward the very end, enough to leave me with only three stars to give, although I waffled between three and four. I’m not sure I understand why the steep and rapid endgame was necessary. My only guess at an explanation is that it was based in reality. And reality often isn’t convenient or pretty.
And hence, back to my original problem! How real was it? A question I may never know the answer to. If it is mostly true, I am sad, and disappointed in the author for hiding their story in a fictional account. If it is largely fictional, I am relieved, but also disappointed because in fiction I want happy endings. If a book is going to make me sad, I’d like to know that before I pick it up.