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Do This, Not That: Dating: What to Do (and NOT Do) in 75+ Difficult Dating Situations
A must-have step-by-step guide on what to do (and what NOT to do) while dating featuring clear instructions and helpful scripts so you can deal with any difficult circumstance in every aspect of your love life.
How do you deal with dating apps, that commitment question, or if you want kids but they don't? Do This, Not Dating is here to help with all your relationship situations.
Romantic relationships can be full of challenging situations and emotions, and no matter how passionate, frustrated, excited, or downright angry you feel, it’s important for you to communicate and find a solution that works for both you and your partner. Whether you’re struggling to find the right words or simply aren’t sure how to approach a topic, this book will give you the tools you need to move forward productively…or learn when to let go and move on.
In Do This, Not Dating , you’ll find eighty common relationship issues that cover everything from your first date to your first fight—and beyond. For each situation, you’ll discover exactly what to do and what to avoid, then learn exactly how to make it happen. Find tips to reframe your thinking, simple scripts to help you figure out what to say, and even advice on your next steps depending on your initial conversation. This book is your must-have guide to any unexpected situation relationships throw your way.
How do you deal with dating apps, that commitment question, or if you want kids but they don't? Do This, Not Dating is here to help with all your relationship situations.
Romantic relationships can be full of challenging situations and emotions, and no matter how passionate, frustrated, excited, or downright angry you feel, it’s important for you to communicate and find a solution that works for both you and your partner. Whether you’re struggling to find the right words or simply aren’t sure how to approach a topic, this book will give you the tools you need to move forward productively…or learn when to let go and move on.
In Do This, Not Dating , you’ll find eighty common relationship issues that cover everything from your first date to your first fight—and beyond. For each situation, you’ll discover exactly what to do and what to avoid, then learn exactly how to make it happen. Find tips to reframe your thinking, simple scripts to help you figure out what to say, and even advice on your next steps depending on your initial conversation. This book is your must-have guide to any unexpected situation relationships throw your way.
192 pages, Hardcover
Published January 10, 2023
8 people are currently reading
53 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
January 17, 2023
As a single 30something year old female I must say, as far as dating books go this is the best.
I love the suggested lines and the practical advice. It's a great book with good advice. It also helped me feel like I wasn't alone with my social anxiety. Now there needs to be be aa sequal called "Him wanting to see you twice in one week is not him trying to smother you"
I love the suggested lines and the practical advice. It's a great book with good advice. It also helped me feel like I wasn't alone with my social anxiety. Now there needs to be be aa sequal called "Him wanting to see you twice in one week is not him trying to smother you"
May 26, 2023
Go google “draw the rest of the fucking owl” and you will have the same level of advice that this book provides.
To give an example here. The book proposes the issue of having a fear of rejection. Totally valid reasonable thing. And then the solution the book proposes is “just don’t think about it as a bad thing” which, that could be a place you get to, but that doesn’t help anyone get to that place.
most of the other advice in his book seems to follow that trend. Supply a realistic concern, and then jump to some sort of mediocre conclusion about it. I found the biggest value in this book to be just a sort of window into why people sometimes behave crazily in dating, it’s because they’ve read advice from books like this.
So ultimately, this is a collection of bad aphorisms with limited application to the messiness of the real world.
To give an example here. The book proposes the issue of having a fear of rejection. Totally valid reasonable thing. And then the solution the book proposes is “just don’t think about it as a bad thing” which, that could be a place you get to, but that doesn’t help anyone get to that place.
most of the other advice in his book seems to follow that trend. Supply a realistic concern, and then jump to some sort of mediocre conclusion about it. I found the biggest value in this book to be just a sort of window into why people sometimes behave crazily in dating, it’s because they’ve read advice from books like this.
So ultimately, this is a collection of bad aphorisms with limited application to the messiness of the real world.
January 17, 2023
This was a helpful, easy to read guide to navigating all aspects of dating, from meeting to bigger relationship issues. The tone was very positive and focused on looking after one's own best interests first, while still being kind and respectful to others. There was a lot of practical information that was very useful, particularly the exercises to work through issues and suggested scripts for how to address sticky or awkward topics. This would be great for anyone new to dating or needing some inspiration to refresh their perspective!
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!
December 29, 2025
I had mixed feelings about Do This, Not That Dating by Hayley Quinn. Some of the advice genuinely made me cringe. For example, I would be appalled if someone asked me out on a first date and suggested going Dutch. That may be a cultural difference, though, as the author references the UK frequently, which seems to be the intended audience.
One scenario in particular earned a serious side eye. When a date suggests an inconvenient location, the recommended response is, “Can we meet halfway? I don’t cross the river for anyone ;-)”. I have no issue with suggesting a halfway point, but the “I don’t cross the river for anyone” line comes off as rude to me, smiley face or not.
That said, not all of the advice missed the mark. There are genuinely helpful tidbits, such as how to break an awkward silence by having a story ready or questions prepared to keep conversation flowing. I also appreciated the guidance on politely navigating disagreements around values or politics. Some sections are actually excellent, especially the advice addressing abusive behavior in a partner.
This book truly runs the full gamut, from trying to land a first date all the way to conversations about death. While I disagreed with a good portion of the advice, it was still an interesting and worthwhile read overall.
One scenario in particular earned a serious side eye. When a date suggests an inconvenient location, the recommended response is, “Can we meet halfway? I don’t cross the river for anyone ;-)”. I have no issue with suggesting a halfway point, but the “I don’t cross the river for anyone” line comes off as rude to me, smiley face or not.
That said, not all of the advice missed the mark. There are genuinely helpful tidbits, such as how to break an awkward silence by having a story ready or questions prepared to keep conversation flowing. I also appreciated the guidance on politely navigating disagreements around values or politics. Some sections are actually excellent, especially the advice addressing abusive behavior in a partner.
This book truly runs the full gamut, from trying to land a first date all the way to conversations about death. While I disagreed with a good portion of the advice, it was still an interesting and worthwhile read overall.
June 27, 2025
This book will probably be insightful after I get a date. Until then, only half the topics in the first chapter are relative to me. I haven't experienced more than four of the othe topics in the reat of the hw book *sigh*.
January 15, 2026
To be vulnerable, acceptance is key to forming a healthy relationship.
February 11, 2023
4/5 stars!
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advance copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
This book provides different situations around dating and gave tips for those specific situations. I appreciate what this book did in terms of giving everybody from different walks of life and different dating situations a chance to be seen and got an advice or more from this. I cannot say about the overall usefulness of all or majority of the tips in here since some I genuinely can't relate, but for those that I can apply in my current situation, I can say that it was really helpful.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advance copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
This book provides different situations around dating and gave tips for those specific situations. I appreciate what this book did in terms of giving everybody from different walks of life and different dating situations a chance to be seen and got an advice or more from this. I cannot say about the overall usefulness of all or majority of the tips in here since some I genuinely can't relate, but for those that I can apply in my current situation, I can say that it was really helpful.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews