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Newlyweds Sloane and Loch are eagerly expecting their first child, though for Sloane that excitement is tempered by pregnancy side effects. Carrying a god’s baby would be enough to deal with, especially with the whole accelerated gestation thing, but it’s not like Sloane can take maternity leave. He works for himself as a private investigator. Which leads him to his next case.

At least this strange new mystery distracts him from the stress of constant puking.

When two priests are murdered within hours of each other, a woman named Daphne hires Sloane and Loch to track down the prime suspect—her brother—before the police do. Between untangling a conspiracy of lies and greed, going toe-to-toe with a gangster, and stealing a cat, they hardly have time to decorate a nursery….

257 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 22, 2022

27 people are currently reading
164 people want to read

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K.L. Hiers

55 books397 followers

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5 stars
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90 (34%)
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30 (11%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
Profile Image for Szidi ☼.
946 reviews61 followers
February 18, 2022
Purrr-fect!

Ohmygods!

I just have no words for this book. Not kidding, no effing words. It was way too hilarious, cute, hot and cuddly. I just - awwwwwwww- can't with this perfection.

Sloane and Loch are one of my top favorite couple ever, and I mean EVERRRR. Loch is really something else, I love the way he is and how he speaks and acts and LOVES Sloane. It's just so adorable.

I laughed many- MANY times while reading this book. And if it's not the perfect way to spend a day while reading a book, I don't know what is and I don't want it. I wish more book has this *magic* in it. When it's perfectly sweet, super hot, and otherworldy hilarious. The perfect combo ever.

The mystery part of the story was really fascinating and exciting. The mpreg part (OMG, the mpreg part!!!!!) was the best and loved the magic around it (spoiler----- the egg! and the egg laying!!! wow).
The tentacle sex - ummm, yeah, that's my favorite part in this series, can you blame me?

I just loved it. This whole series is so good and I love every book in it, but Sloane and Loch are the ultimate favorite.

I don't know who was the inspiration for Loch, but I need more characters like him.

The first scene when I LAUGHED OUT LOUD, and it's only at 5%:

"I've also been thinking that Uncle Gordoth should change his name. Seeing as how he's been touched many times now by Chase, the 'Untouched' makes no sense."
"Loch, we can talk about that later--"
"I would like to suggest Gordoth the Slut."



And the next scene, at 7%

"Maybe we should do the nursery in purle, then, since that's Great Azaethoth's color, huh?"
"Although my great-great-great-grandfather is the most powerful of all the gods, he is not the best. That would be me."
"Do you have a color?"
"Yes."
"Well, what is it?"
"Purple, obviously."
...
"And before you ask me, I'm still not sold on 'Azaethoth the Lesser Junior'."
...
"I think Daniel Azaethoth the Lesser Junior sounds lovely."
"Perfect."


And if you're still not sold on the hilariousness of Loch:


"I'm just making sure you have your facts gay."
"Don't you mean straight?"
"No." Loch grinned at his own joke.
Profile Image for Janet (iamltr).
1,224 reviews84 followers
June 12, 2023
Well here we are

Book 5 of the tentacle sex and mystery series

There will be spoilers ahead

Ok so, in here we are back with Sloan and Loch the god of thieves and Sloan suddenly became very much pregnant. Not just a little preggers, but he went to take a nap and suddenly his belly is huge. He is gonna lay an egg.

Since some people have issues with pregnancy, just a heads up that this whole book basically revolved around being pregnant.

In this one there is no god trying to destroy the world, but just a normal double murder. Things happen, we find out that more ancient races still exist, they just mated with humans and now can look totally not like a kitty, fishman, or boar.

tbh, this mystery was way better than the ones before it, even with no god.

Yall know how it goes now, lots of tentacle sex with snippets of the actual mystery. Totally my vibe. I just have to point out that when Sloan got so big, they had trouble having sex at the beginning and at one point, Loch used his tentacles to pleasure himself with his tentacock. I first thought this was more like giving himself a bj, but nah, he totally sexed himself up by getting this massive thing inside another tentacle.

The baby egg is born near the end, they run off to solve the mystery and save some people, then come back and watch the new godlet be born.

While you and I know that Sloan birthed this babe himself, but how does he setup this child for life? I mean what will the birth certificate look like?

Anyways, we find out that Ell, the love of the zombie Fred's life, is the brother of Tedward from book 2. But its just a lot of infodumping with no actual visit from Ted, the kitty king, the kitty prince, nor Jay, who deserves love.

I will point out that I absolutely hated the fact that Sloan was being told all these hints and outright being told about things happening during the whole story, and he just forgets it all.

He would get these whispers, telling him something, he would think about it for a minute, then the next thing we know, he moves on to something else. Once or twice, I could forgive, but every single time??
Profile Image for Jacqueleen the Reading Queen♡.
1,542 reviews104 followers
March 3, 2022
I just love this series! It's always so much fun and guaranteed to be ridiculous. On top of that it's also hot as hell with all the steamy tentacle goodness. In book 5 we are back on a case with a very pregnant Sloane and his husband/god Loch. There are plenty of cameos from old favorites and even a new and powerful acquaintance whom I am very curious about. We are given very little information about him which of course makes me need to know more asap. Fans of the previous books will definitely enjoy this next adventure in the series.

At the end of the book is a sneak peek at book 6 and from the little snippet shared I'm getting some MMM vibes. It features a couple I know I've been dying for and it appears they may or may not be adding to their little romance. It could just be Hiers being a big tease or I could be right. All I know is I can't wait to find out!!
Profile Image for Juniper.
3,391 reviews24 followers
March 21, 2022
This series blends heat, humor, and a certain joyful absurdity that’s almost impossible to resist. Sloane and Loch are seriously delightful— together they’re everything you never knew you needed from an incredibly powerful (and seriously snarky) deity and his totally capable and amazing spouse— seriously, Sloane can be pregnant, deal with a god/husband run amok, and solve mysteries— that’s all kinds of impressive, and he deserves all the credit. Aside from my all time favorite duo, this story gives readers the chance to see some familiar faces from earlier in the series, as well as some narrative pieces moving into place for future installments as well. A great installment in a great series, well worth a read.

*I received an ARC of this book and am voluntarily leaving a review.
Profile Image for Amos24601.
1,286 reviews44 followers
March 6, 2022
Ahhh, the much anticipated return to Sloane and Loch. I have been eagerly awaiting this one. Sloane and Loch are two of my favorites book characters. Their chemistry, along with Loch’s puppy-like existence and Sloane’s adorable exasperation, make for a perfect match.

In Just Calamarried, Sloane finds himself navigating a murder investigation and a godly pregnancy. I loved how Hiers made Sloane’s pregnancy relatable. No, it’s isn’t the most beautiful experience for some of us, but the payout makes it worth it. That seems to be Sloane’s takeaway here. This aspect made the human element of this series standout beautifully. Loch is, well…Loch. He adds the comedic relief while being so endearing you just want to hug him. His absolute devotion to Sloane knows no bounds. I adore him.

There is a double murder mystery set against a backdrop of warring religious factions. Sloane is a wonderful investigator and this story really showed off his chops. We also get to visit with some old friends and meet a very intriguing new one. I would also be remiss if I didn’t mention the absolute sexiness of tentacle time between Loch and Sloane. It has no right being as sexy as it is. We get a glimpse of the next book, Our Shellfish Desires, and I am stoked for this one. It looks like a MMM triad and I am so here for it.

Another delightfully fun addition to a series that keeps on getting better.

*I received an ARC of this book and this is my honest review.
Profile Image for Natalie  H.
3,793 reviews30 followers
August 4, 2022
Aww cute baby. I'm liking how the family is getting bigger. More interested in the bigger picture than the smaller murders. Sloane and Az are as crazy as always.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Joyffree.
3,403 reviews60 followers
March 22, 2022
My favorite couple is highlighted once again
Our sweet Starkiller Sloane finds that carrying a gods baby is teeming with the unexpected - most leave him questioning his sanity
As the pregnancy advances Sloane finds himself a stressed mess
Add in a missing person who is not really missing
Two dead priests
A magical possible god mob boss who may or may not help and does not seem to be able to give straight answers (I am looking forward to more of this character)
A kidnapped cat with an attitude
A cult that wants to wake the old gods
And blessedly overly caring family-in-law
Oh and Loch (need I say more)
What is left of poor Sloane is swollen feet, nausea, and tattered nerves...

If you enjoy fantasy, seriously steamy smexy scenes, tentacles, mystery, suspense, light-hearted banter, immature gods, bad guys, folly, mpreg, humor, romance and so much more then this is the series for you
You will need to read the previous books to know what is going on and who is who
37 reviews1 follower
March 22, 2022
Every time I read the most recent book in this series I am reminded how much I wish I could be apart of this universe and have them as friends! By book 5 in a series I am usually only continuing the series for continuitys sake, however K.L. Hiers amazes me again by providing a series that keeps me not only engaged but has me actively wanting and wishing for the next book in the series. Sloan and Loch's antics throughout the book had me reading this all in one setting and laughing my but off the whole time, I'm talking continuous giggles that make my husband stop what he's doing to find out what in the world is wrong with me. As always, I adored this book and cannot wait for the next creatively named addition!
Profile Image for Latecia Jennings.
2,325 reviews10 followers
March 22, 2022
**ARC Review**

I really really am enjoying this series. It's oh so entertaining and watching Sloane and Loch progress in their relationship...they are soooo lovey dovey...so sweet. I have so much fun reading...the cases they get themselves involved in, the secondary characters...the romance...now a big plus with the addition to their family...so adorable. Let's not forget them tentacles...that's what had drawn me to the series in the first place...LOL. Loved these guys and that ending was super duper nice...I want more!
162 reviews
March 23, 2022
Azaethoth the Lesser Junior...giggle
Plot: Cults, mystery, mpreg, another hilarious episode of Loch and Sloane’s lovey-dovey life, this time with a godly pregnancy
Feels: Lots of laughs in this one
Drama: The mystery behind the two deaths, Sloane on the case while battling nausea
Heat: 4/5 - yes to more tentacle-loving and “sensuous sizzling slamming” lol
Characters: Loved revisiting previous characters - made me want to do a reread of the series
Pacing: Fast
Length: Wouldn’t have minded if this was longer…
Ending: HFN for the couple and a hint to more of Alexander and Rota’s story next. Can’t wait!
492 reviews3 followers
March 22, 2022
Absolutely fantastic!

While this book didn't necessarily add anything to the cultist arc I think it was incredibly necessary to the Sloan and loch romance. Interesting mystery, some action, lots of sweetness and heat, and loads more reasons to love these two as charcters. I actually cried a little during the naming ceremony. It was so amazing! Loved this book from beginning to end!

Thank you but also curse you for the teaser to the next book, now I want it even more!!
1,989 reviews25 followers
March 22, 2022
Sloane and Loch are perfect together. They have a little one on the way, newlyweds, and on top of that, they have to solve several murders. The book is funny, sweet, witty, romantic, and I love how attentive these two are to each other. The book had me laughing and I look forward to Loch's outrageous behaviour and the patience that Sloan has for his husband is amusing also.
It was great seeing the previous characters and I'm looking forward to Chase and Merrick's story.
Profile Image for Ida Umphers.
5,495 reviews47 followers
March 22, 2022
Sloane and Loch just get more and more entertaining as a couple and they have the perfect mix of steamy love story, caring parent vibes and snark. Here we get to see Sloane working brilliantly at his investigating and also dealing with all the stresses of pregnancy. Can't wait for the next entry in this series.
879 reviews4 followers
March 22, 2022
This is the best series! KL Hiers draws you in immediately and never lets you go! Sloane, Loch and their merry band of friends, foes and hilarious side characters keep you entertained from the get go. Unique and funny with a whole lotta love, this is absolutely wonderful and you need to check this out!
Profile Image for Melissa.
641 reviews1 follower
March 21, 2022
Sloane and Loch continue to be absolutely awesome! They are funny and sweet and totally smexy and I have loved watching thier relationship grow. I can only hope for more. More evil to fight, fun characters both old and new and all the pregnancy blues make this book totally unmissable.
I voluntarily reviewed an advance copy of this book.
Profile Image for Liz Prosser.
306 reviews1 follower
March 22, 2022
Wow! Another amazing addition to this other worldly series, chock full of laughs, love, murder, and suspense. Loch and Sloane are back in this book and they have a double murder to solve. As always Loch does some stealing while Sloane struggles with being pregnant. Another 5 star read in this incredible series!
Profile Image for Virginia Lee.
2,459 reviews35 followers
March 23, 2022
This is 5th book in the series. We finally got to cuddle and cute Loch story. The murder investigate and all the uptick of activity between the couple. Sloane and Loch are so crazy in love that you can feel it. Cant wait to see what happens next in this world
Profile Image for Jerri.
722 reviews4 followers
March 15, 2022
Join Loch and Sloane as they continue solving mysteries- and watch hilarity ensue. Sloan gets to experience pregnancy while Loch babies him outrageously. Quite a few characters from previous books drop in and add to the fun.
There are some truly touching moments, too. Loch and his family really are the best at loving and taking care of Sloane.
Fun story, lots of laugh. It’s a great addition to the series.
Profile Image for Suzy.
946 reviews7 followers
March 15, 2022
Sloane and Loch are back again and this time Sloane is pregnant with Loch's baby, poor Sloane is dealing with all the effects of a pregnancy, but Loch is adorable with Sloane, always make him feel comfortable and happy. I love this side of Loch!
There's a new case to solve and thank god this one is less dangerous and dramatic than before, It was so sweet to watch this two enjoy their pregnancy, also when the time comes for the baby to arrive it was amazing and I melted with them! I enjoy this book so much!
Profile Image for Jacquie Stewart.
2,623 reviews74 followers
March 11, 2022
4.5

It was great to be back with Sloane and Loch again. This time Sloane is pregnant with Loch's baby and is dealing with the effects of a godly pregnancy.
There's still a case to solve but it is less dramatic and dangerous than before. It was nice to slow down a bit and focus more on the relationship than plot.
Loved how the birth and everything after was handled
Profile Image for Leigh Gaskill.
839 reviews30 followers
August 6, 2022
Cute

I really like that even though we keep coming back to Sloane and Loch every other book, K.L. Hiers definitely keeps things fresh. Sloane and Loch are on a missing person's cade which leads them to a hidden world of beings that exist right alongside them that they never knew continued to exist on Aeon. And poor Sloane has to deal with accelerated pregnancy symptoms and delivery to top everything off, poor guy. I would be a little stressed too!

I liked the addition of Stoker, he likes to push Lochs buttons but his gratuitous flirtation with Sloane was actually very humorous, especially when it gets Loch going. A few more teensy tiny puzzle pieces (VERY TINY) fell into place, and this book sets up directly for the next one (which I'm excited for). Spice was ON POINT 🔥
Profile Image for Danis  ❤️ MM.
794 reviews6 followers
August 21, 2023
Sloane and Loch are back in book 5 of the series.

A very pregnant Sloane is trying to solve the murder of not one, but two religious leaders before the whole town erupts into violence. They also need to track down client's missing brother, who's wrapped up in all the mayhem. Along the way they meet Stoker, a supernatural gangster. Neither Loch nor Sloane know quite what Stoker is. But he's definitely powerful. Oh and he's quite the a$$hole too.

I really like Stoker. His complete lack of morals was refreshing. You just never knew what he was going to do but you did know it would benefit him, whatever it was. It was a good, fast paced story. And I always like Loch and Sloane together.
19 reviews
March 22, 2022
Every new book in this series is my favorite one! They keep getting better and better and I fall even more in love with the characters every time we meet them. The sexy times are even sexier, the laughs are even bigger and the mystery gets deeper and deeper. I cannot say enough how excited I was to be meeting Loch and Sloane's sweet little baby!

Hiers takes the opportunity to make something so unique in this series and every book expands this wonderful universe she's created. I'm always hooked from begining to end and I'll never be ready for the series to be over 💜
Profile Image for Joscelyn Smith.
2,298 reviews17 followers
March 29, 2022
Sloane and Loch continue to pull me in. These two wonderful characters and their fantastical world just keep getting better and better, I loved seeing their family get bigger. Another great addition to this entertaining series.

*I voluntarily reviewed an ARC of this book*
Profile Image for Jenn (not Lily).
4,794 reviews27 followers
April 23, 2024
3.5 stars
Not quite as enjoyable as book 1 or the stories that aren't centered on Sloane and Loch. It seems like their relationship development is solely centered on sex. Lots of sex. Lots and lots... The mystery was a little flimsy, too. Maybe I'll take a break from the series for a bit.
Profile Image for Sev.
265 reviews
August 26, 2022
Note to self: Do not read before bedtime because you'll be up half the night turning pages. Not to mention laughing -- been awhile since I'd read the previous book in this series and I'd forgotten how funny a certain Elder God can be, especially when dealing with his mate, other mortals, and various magical entities. But despite my lack of sleep, I was highly entertained. 4 stars.
Profile Image for Jeniver Maria.
612 reviews2 followers
October 19, 2022
Only this series are my favourites from all this author books. Loch was a funny god and Sloane was a male that has patience like a saint. Together they are a powerful couple
322 reviews1 follower
August 20, 2022
Another sweet entry into Sloane and Loth's love story. I liked the mystery in this story, and was glad for a change that it focused on something other than one of Loth's brothers trying to wake their father to destroy the world. It felt more like this book did some light world building but focused primarily on the plot of this book - which I highly appreciated.
Profile Image for Danielle.
1,061 reviews7 followers
August 3, 2023
Slightly less fun than the others in the series
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