This Is Your Own Time You’re Wasting: Classroom Confessions, Calamities and Clangers

by Lee Parkinson, Adam Parkinson

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER The side-splittingly hilarious and heart-warming next book from your favourite teacher duo, The Two Mr Ps. Now put that thing down! Yes YOU.
It’s time to sit up and listen … From the stars of Two Mr Ps in a Pod(Cast) and the bestselling authors of Put a Wet Paper Towel On It comes a book filled with chaos, clangers and confessions from the … classrooms. You’ll be taken on a journey where you’ll meet a rogues’ gallery of classroom characters, read some juicy teacher confessions and learn why every primary teacher’s least favourite lesson is the dreaded … SEX EDUCATION! You’ll even get the inside scoop on what it was like (attempting) to teach during a pandemic. So, settle down, grab a cuppa and enjoy this book as we pull back the curtain on the weird and wonderful world of primary schools. After all, THIS IS YOUR OWN TIME YOU’RE WASTING.

Genres: Nonfiction, Education, Memoir, Humor, Audiobook

336 pages, Hardcover

Published October 11, 2022

Reviews

[Stephen · Rating 4 out of 5]

thanks to the publishers and netgalley for a free copy in return for an open and honest review.

Found the latest in this series funny as the first with the further adventures and stories of the school teachers, didn't disappoint and can see school teacher relating to this book and maybe had experienced similar things.

[Sofia 🍉 · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book I’ve dipped in and out, and it’s such a fun read! ‘90s kids and pre-90s kids will appreciate this book because it includes a lot of school aspects we can relate to and will bring memories back (whether you like them or not is another story)

[Lynn Butterfield · Rating 3 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Lee and Adam Parkinson are 2 primary school teachers who have written a comedy non-fiction book about their experiences in the profession. They include whole chapters on embarrassing parental encounters, show and tell and teaching during the pandemic.

✨
This book was good, but I feel it was only interesting to me as I am also a teacher. However, as I’m a secondary school teacher, I did feel that I was far less interested in this than I would be as a primary school teacher. There were parts of the humour that I just didn’t get, leaving me wondering whether many non-teachers would relate to this. Anyway, it did give me a laugh - especially the sex ed bit 😂 And it has inspired me to listen to the Two P’s in a Pod podcast!

[Louise Bath · Rating 3 out of 5]

Having seen and loved Lee and Adam Parkinson when I saw them on This Morning, and having experience of volunteering in Early Years education and teacher training, I was expecting to love this book - but unfortunately, I found it disappointing. Yes, there are some *fabulously* funny stories, and there are some *fantastic* observations on what's wrong with the funding, administration and observations of teaching; there's no doubting the dedication and love of teaching the personable Parkinson brothers have: and most teachers will be nodding in agreement with their recommendations.

However, as it stands, much of this book *may* go over the heads of general readers - and I really do wonder if the manuscript was seen by an editor prior to publication.

On a personal level, I liked the separation of each brother's contributions by the use of different fonts, although I soon forgot which brother was which. But one issue I had was the book's general style; if, like their first book this was generated via their podcast, it's a shame that it reads like a transcription of said podcast. The opening of the book reads like the script of an over-enthusiastic 80s/90s Saturday morning children's TV show, and the overuse of exclamation marks really irritated me.

Ironically, punctuation is another issue for me. Paragraphs and sentences really need to have more than commas sometimes, to avoid the reader being puzzled when a train of thought seems to end abruptly, and having to reread passages until they make sense. Don't be afraid of colons and semicolons!

I said earlier that general readers might struggle with this book - I know I did! - and I stand by that and my concern about the editing process before publication. I didn't *hate* this book by any means, or my rating would've been much lower! However, what this book badly needs is a glossary of terms and acronyms used; we've all heard of - eg - 'Ofsted', but what does it actually mean? It was frustrating to be really enjoying a section only to be brought up short by jargon that'll be familiar to teachers and probably parents of school-age children, but means very little to anyone else.

At the end of the day though, this is still well-worth a read: a good insight into the teaching profession and a slap-down to anyone who thinks it's an easy job for lazy people, with months of holidays and a working week of 9am-3pm!

[karla_bookishlife · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a cracking read! If you haven't read the first book :"Put a Wet Paper Towel on it" or heard of the two Mr Ps, you need to fix this immediately! This second book I'd the perfect follow up to the first, jam-packed with more comedy gold. I laughed I cried laughing and gulp, I even welled up a little at some of the deeply profound statements our little cherubs come up with: "What do you want to be when you are older? - Happy". Exactly that! As a teacher, I would happily gift this book to all my colleagues. Indeed both books should be handed out immediately to all who enter the profession. You will recognise yourself and your classes between the pages. However, you don't need to have an affiliation with the teaching profession to read and appreciate the humour. You will recognise the hilarious tales and one off lines from your own school days, from your kids, or from your experiences of lockdown homeschooling. I love the reminiscing about how good it felt when the TV used to be wheeled into the classroom- my own children will never understand what a joy that was! A good eye-opener to what really goes on behind the scenes in schools. Laugh out loud musings that left me chuckling to myself all day long. #ThisIsYourOwnTimeYoureWasting #LeeParkinson #AdamParkinson #Netgalley #TheTwoMrPs #comedygold

[David Shepherd · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks to the publishers and NetGalley for a free copy in return for an open and honest review.

This is the second of the collections of the amusing anecdotes that happen to teachers in the classroom.

I have no doubt that many teachers (primary particularly) will recognise many of the scenarios appearing in the book.

However, you do not need to be a teacher to appreciate the humour in this (and the previous) books. You will likely recognise the humorous stories and one-off lines from your school. I know that I recall the days when the TV was wheeled into the classroom and the teacher then struggled for 10-15 minutes to get reception (there were only 3 channels at the time).

Definite laugh out loud moments and lots of smiles and definitely some sniggering!

The book is based on a podcast (‘Two Mr P’s in a Pod(cast)’)

[Liam Crook-Chambers · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the second book by the two Mr P’s, two primary school teachers who have built up a following over the last number of years with their anecdotes and stories of primary school life which have been turned into a podcast as well as the books. Working in a primary school myself, I found this a very relatable and enjoyable book. There are some hilarious ‘laugh out loud’ moments including the list of issues in the first aid book and some of the comments made during sex ed lessons. I would strongly recommend that adults who don’t work in schools also read this - schools can be a wonderful place but also a really tough and challenging place too and this book only scratches the surface on what it is like day to day in a primary school.

[Jonathan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was fortunate enough to be an advanced reader of the original work 'Put A Wet Paper Towel on It: The Weird and Wonderful World of Primary Schools'. So when I heard there was a sequel, I bought it instantly.

Like the original, this has the perfect mix of nostalgia and humour and discusses how the education system has changed, both in recent times and very recent times, through COVID-19.

It is an effortless read and highly recommended to anyone in education who fondly remembers their school days or loves a 'confessions' book.

[Ash · Rating 5 out of 5]

Speaking as a teacher, there are so many great stories and points to come out of this book. It describes the ups and downs, while not exaggerating and being frank and honest. It's hard not to feel proud of the profession whilst reading this.

The book itself is something that anyone who has no kids or thinks they know what being in the classroom is like should give a read.
Told with great humour, I'd recommend this to anyone!

[Kath · Rating 4 out of 5]

This can be slightly repetitive and preachy in parts so I expect the original podcasts were more punchy. The authors are obviously brilliant teachers who really care about their pupils and the situations are easy to relate to apart from some bloke-ish tales and a preoccupation with 'wind'. The phrase 'not making good choices' made me laugh every time.

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought I should read the sequel and it was again a pretty funny insight into life in schools. I love the addition of other peoples stories also!

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

Enjoyed the funny stories but I did expect more. The end of the book got very preachy. Don’t get me wrong, I agree with everything that was written but I just expected more funny stories.

[Undomiel Books · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very funny, witty and enjoyable read - even though I work in secondary education, the antics of primary education are not far off my own experiences, and this book just gave me so much nostalgia for being in primary myself.

[Molly K · Rating 3 out of 5]

‘This is your own time you’re wasting’ is an amusing tale written about teaching, published by two brothers, both of which are primary school teachers.

It’s a quick read, helped by the light and easy tone the book takes - it feels almost conversational. But do not be fooled - among the jokes and the light hearted stories about the unbelievable amount of mess children make there are hard truths contained within the tale. About the hours. About the detrimental affect of lockdown on children and staff alike. It was a wonderful read.

However, I can’t help but feel multiple parts felt like a walking advertisement which really took away from the light hearted nature of the story. In the lockdown chapters there were paragraphs about how it was great because his business ran fully online and oh did he mention his private coaching sessions? It felt just really unnecessary.

Thank you to netgalley for the ARC.

[Alison Bradbury · Rating 2 out of 5]

As a Primary School teacher I was intrigued to read this book - I am only glad I received a review copy and didn't have to buy it as it would have been money I felt cheated of.

Reading like a transcript from a podcast, this books is packed with stories that have been sent to Lee and Adam for their podcasts. I have been in and around education for my entire life and been a primary teacher for the last 20 years and I can honestly say that I have never come across anything like the 'stories' in this book. I didn't appreciate the absolute swathes of the book that are dedicated to fart jokes, stories and mishaps - they seem to appear on every single page. The lazy stereotyping of all girls being clingy swots and all boys being cheeky, jokey sports mad kids is just a plain lie - I have taught hundreds of clever boys and sporty girls, laughed with the girls at their jokes and held the hands of clingy boys all day, so to portray it the way it is in this book seems unfair - I can only imagine that the two writers see themselves as the jokey, cheeky, sporty boys that the teachers could rely on.

I was so close to giving up on this book and was considering a one star review but it saved itself with the last two chapters where there is genuine insightful discussion of teaching during and post pandemic. This was interesting and engaging and had a different tone to the rest - how I wish it had all been like this! Yes, by all means, share stories from the classroom (I could tell a few of my own), but this reads like office gossip and I had trouble believing it.

For books with (genuinely) funny stories of school life you should consider reading Gervase Phinn which are much better and are actually very funny!!

Thanks to Netgalley and the publishers for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Helen Frost · Rating 4 out of 5]

Now reading this on my sacred six week holiday was either my best or my worst idea ever seeing as I’ve worked in early years for the last nine years or so. Excuse any typos, I’m coming at you from a caravan with sketchy internet in rainy Scarborough. Anyway, turns out it was a good plan and I was chuckling out loud pretty much from the first page. Also thank you for giving EYFS teachers their own sections and voicing what a uniquely tough job we face (and how many times we’re faced with bodily fluids and worse on a daily basis).
The anecdotes are numerous and entirely relatable, I could definitely add many of my own and it gave a real sense of comradeship. I also related to a lot of the points as a parent and a homeschool survivor.
Your book certainly evoked lots of memories from my own time at Primary School so I think the reach of the book is pretty much everyone and who doesn’t love a few leaked secrets from the ‘other side’ that is the staffroom?!
A few minor points on SPAG though because, as a teacher, you have to be entirely bulletproof on this or you get your audience twitching in horror or delight.
A great number of times (ahem) you use the word amount when you mean number. I’m not entirely sure what you mean by coits, is that quoits? Also a compass has no place in a pencil case unless you’re taking it on an orienteering expedition, I think you mean a pair or a set of compasses. Lastly, in your golf anecdote I would definitely go with ground rather than floor, being outside. Right, I’ll tuck my red marking pen away again, as you were.
Overall though, an utterly brilliant follow up to the original and I almost enjoyed it more. I also loved your unique take and opinions on life and wholeheartedly agreed with your stances throughout.
Thank you for all the laughs.

[Gareth Morris · Rating 2 out of 5]

Disappointing

Largely disappointing compilation of other teachers’ stories.

I found the book largely unreadable for a few reasons: firstly, it is poorly formatted on kindle, so the different fonts used to indicate the respective author of a section doesn’t display. As a consequence, the text comes across as an author having a conversation with themselves. Additionally, quite a few spelling, grammar and punctuation mistakes are to be found.

Further, I could not make sense who this book was pitched at; it is written as if it is for kids, though risqué anecdotes suggest that this is not true. I couldn’t enjoy the very chatty style, which seems more like a podcast transcript than a book.

The majority of the books was either nothing to do with teaching (instead rambling anecdotes about the authors’ families and friends) or written by other teachers and quoted to pad out the pages - there was very little substance here, I found. Admittedly, there were some genuinely insightful comments and commentary about teaching during the pandemic towards the end of the book (hence the second star), but I felt it was very much too little, too late.

Undoubtedly there will be some that enjoy reading this book, but I wasn’t one of them.

[Alison Starnes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lee and Adam Parkinson's second book has a similar diet to their first, an inside look at education based on their popular podcast Two Mr Ps in a Pod(cast).

Teachers and parents have shared their stories, some definitely more embarrassing than others.

Reading some of the stories recounted here made me chuckle, bringing back memories of children and teachers from my schooldays.

Inevitably, some stories involve bodily functions and items that belong in an adults only environment but somehow found their way into 'Show and Tell' sessions. Teachers didn't always realise what some items were for, leading to huge embarrassment when enlightened by colleagues.

Some practices adopted during the pandemic, such as the introduction of digital teaching platforms, have led to positive changes in education; however, resistance remains.

The authors are passionate about young people having a positive relationship with social media and argue for the introduction of a Digital Literacy Framework in England (it already exists in Wales).

This is an entertaining read that also makes some salient points around education, and can be enjoyed by educators and parents alike.

I received a free digital ARC of this book from HarperCollins UK, and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Felicity 'Flick' · Rating 5 out of 5]

I need to admit that I haven’t read “ Put a wet paper towel on it.” I can feel the judging already 😂😂 but I am on my way to get the first book…. Honest.

I have loved every minute of this book, from Show & tell to Pandemic (being a parent during that time.) to “o moments” and to everything else. I have nodded my head to all the parts I can see happening in my school or what I’ve been through. I have sniggered to myself and my son asking “are you okay?” To cringing and saying “oh my goodness.” Out loud 😂😂

During the Pandemic I was lucky to be at home with my son who has ADHD, helping him throughout the session. I didn’t want to send him in during the pandemic and he didn’t want to as it was all different, luckily I was able to help him throughout that up and down year. But coming back in school it has been wonderful, seeing the children grow during every moment and smiling when they get something correct or seeing their confidence shine- I do love being a Teaching Assistant.

I do hope another book comes out soon. Thank you to both Mr P’s for the best book ever!!

Parents and teaching staff this is a must read book, you won’t regret it.

[Louise (Bookmarks and Stages blog) Cannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

From teacher duo and hosts of Two Mr Ps in a Pod(cast), brings funny book: This Is Your Own Time You're Wasting. It will resonate with most child educators and support staff. I, myself work with children of many ages and have done for many years and this is a book for both parents/caregivers and education staff to have fun over, especially staff. There are anecdotes galore, from Show and Tell and how not everything might be quite what you would expect to kids wanting to share every detail with you, including bodily functions to stories they tell to the antics they get up to. For parents/caregivers, there are certain things that will give them insights into what they may not see in the home and also a small bit about staff.

It also serves a little bit of a reminder of education in the pandemic, to a certain extent as the focus is on teachers and we know that there are many other people involved to make education work.

The style is chatty, much like a podcast is, so it makes this a book that's easy to dip in and out of, rather perhaps, feeling the need to read it all in one go. For the type of book it is, I don't necessarily think that's a bad thing or way to read it.

[Mark · Rating 3 out of 5]

As a retired primary school teacher, I have plenty of experience of the education related horror stories collected in the first 75% of this book. Unfortunately an anthology of decontextualised teacher anecdotes didn’t do much for this reader and I quickly succumbed to bodily function fatigue (chapter 7 is literally full of excrement). In the final quarter, the authors change their approach and reflect on their own experiences especially with regard to teaching during the pandemic. This makes for a much more coherent and satisfactory reading experience.
I would take issue though with the authors’ belief that marking is a waste of time. How are children meant to learn if they don’t get feedback on their efforts? Old fashioned teachers like me would consider it disrespectful to our pupils not to mark their work. Marking needs to be constructive and appropriate to the age and ability of the child and pupils need to be given time to read and respond to what the teacher’s written. Of course it got easier when I jumped ship to the private sector at 50 where I was trusted to get on with the job of enthusing manageable numbers of children without too much senior management interference.

[Nicola Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a super fun book based on teaching primary school kids from the perspective of teachers! I adored the first book and when I saw there was a release for the second, I couldn’t wait! If you’re looking for a guaranteed hilarious and funny read, this is your book.

It’s based off the podcast ‘Two Mr P’s in a Pod(cast)’ - brilliant name by the way, and had be chuckling throughout / slightly nauseous (vomit and poo I’ll say no more) those poor teachers! I was hugely entertained as I read it from cover to cover and the content included was all brilliant.

The book soon dwindled to nothing and I’d finished it in a blink of an eye. I don’t think I could ever get bored reading these stories and confessions from the teachers. More please!

Great work Mr P’s. Gold star stickers all round. Teachers do a fab job and my hat will always go off to them in a bow of awe and admiration for what they do.

Thank you to the authors and publisher for this book via NetGalley in return for my honest thoughts and review.

[Lucy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having read the first book by the Mr P's, I was incredibly excited to pick up this second instalment of life as a Primary School teacher. It doesn't matter if you haven't read the previous book; this will work as a stand-alone if necessary.

This read is entertaining, comical, and credible, ensuring many will be able to relate to these tales, whether reminiscing over your school days or if you work in these settings. With chapters covering things like 'Show and Tell' and 'Teaching Through A Pandemic', and 'Weird Parent Interactions', this needs celebrating for providing some humour in today's harsh climates.

The way these two tell a story is a huge part of why I enjoyed this so much! I flittered between audio and digital, and the narration version had me laughing loudly whilst hanging out the washing.

Admittingly, I did enjoy the first book more; however, this read still comes highly recommended for some light-hearted reading, which is not to be taken too seriously.

[Theediscerning · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well, if you’re going to give a reviewer a gift of a title like that… This reads very much like the verbiage from some podcasters you’ve never heard of but quickly – Oh. So. Quickly. – realise just love the sound of their own voices. But they’re not the only culprits, for the teachers when they eventually get quoted can waffle on – one twice-as-long-as-it-need-be anecdote about the playground whistle being mistaken for the ‘go!’ signal by a school trip’s steam train driver, before the kids were anywhere near on board, would get about a B for lack of editing.

So this says a heck of a lot more about the standards of British schoolin then it thinked it did. Potentially this is toilet browsing for those in the industry – as long as they’re the rare few that want to spend more time thinking about it than they already have to. For anyone else, an hour’s lesson with these guys would be 55 minutes too many.

[Ace · Rating 5 out of 5]

I feel I am slightly biased as after reading the first book (also via NetGalley - thank you), I have been an avid listener of the podcast, despite not being a parent or anything to do with the teaching profession. My housemate is an early years teacher and it's been a delight getting some more insight into her world.

Lee and Adam are a delight, both in audio and text, I can wholeheartedly say this book isn't to be missed, even if you've not read the first book or don't teach or have kids.

Genuine, snort laugh out loud moments all the way.

I thought retail /customer service took infinite amounts of patience but compared to the nonsense that teachers seem to encounter on a near daily basis... They're absolute saints!

[Jo-anne Atkinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Primary schools are a mine of hilarity, from the antics of the children to the embarrassment of the staff. In this book the two Mr Ps take a selection of anecdotes from their podcast and add in a few new ones. I loved the stories, although my experience is more secondary I empathise completely. I also like the fact that the two Mr Ps don't work in leafy suburbs as evidenced by some of the language and the standout tale about the tattoo.
My only negative is that large chunks of the book are taken up with rants about politics and that really spoils it. Yes, OFSTED/SLT/Governments guidelines are frustrating and often soul-destroying but we don't need to be reminded in a book that is based on humour.

[Mrs · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t know what to say about this book other than it is really good. It made me laugh with some of the stories and anecdotes throughout the book. Having school teacher friends I know how hard they work and through covid it must have been horrendous. I cannot recommend it enough and it is as good as the first novel Put a Wet Paper Towel on it. My grandchildren were home schooled through the pandemic and I know from their parents who traumatic it was. Put school teachers on the top pillar for excellence and for all the work they do inside and outside of school. Please read this book and treat teachers with the respect they most definitely deserve although most parents do I am sure. Loved it

[Amna Waqar · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm writing this review a week after coming back from Robinwood - I'm still exhausted!
The two Mr Ps have done it again! This is a great follow up from Put A Wet Paper Towel On It and is relatable for anyone who works/has worked in a school.
There are plenty of laugh out loud moments through anecdotes all involving teachers. As well as hilarious stories, there is also a chapter on how difficult it was teaching and home schooling during the pandemic. And as with the first book, the two Mr Ps continue with their firm critique of the education system.
A highly recommended read for anyone who has ever taught in a school.
My thanks to NetGalley and HarperCollins UK for providing me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Jordan · Rating 2 out of 5]

"It's your own time you're wasting" is a follow on book to the very enjoyable "Put a wet paper towel on it" and is filled with anecdotes and experiences from the unpredictable world of primary school teaching.

Although I really enjoyed the previous book, this one seemed a bit lacking in comparison. Focusing on anecdotes and (true) stereotypes for humour I didn't get the dose of insight that I did with the first book. It's definitely a funny and easy read, but not as compelling as the first.

I'm sorry to say I also found the humour a bit blokey for me, maybe it was the amount of fart jokes, and I'm sorry to be a buzz kill, but something about this book just didn't do it for me.

[Laura Stevenson · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a read. I spent most of my time laughing out loud while reading this. It perfectly sums up the life of a teacher and I recognised a lot of things that I've said and experienced in the classroom.

I love listening to the two Mr P's podcasts so it was a no-brainer that I'd want to read this book.

It's not only good for educators but it would also give parents an insight into life in a primary school setting.

On a serious note the chapter on the pandemic was very touching as again it summed up everything that educators experienced during a very stressful time.

I'm hoping for a third instalment at a later stage. 100% would recommend.