No Filter: The Good, the Bad, and the Beautiful

by Paulina Porizkova

“A book about a rare life, profound love, profound grief, anxiety, self-assurance, empowerment, aging, loss, and joy. It is nuanced, complex, insightful, helpful, and constantly surprising.” —Ann Patchett, New York Times bestselling author of These Precious Days

Writer and former model Paulina Porizkova pens a series of intimate, introspective, and enlightening essays about the complexities of womanhood at every age, pulling back the glossy magazine cover and writing from the heart.

Born in Cold War Czechoslovakia, Paulina Porizkova rose to prominence as a model, appearing on her first Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover in 1984. As the face of Estée Lauder in 1989, she was one of the highest-paid models in the world. When she was cast in the music video for the song “Drive” by The Cars, it was love at first sight for her and frontman Ric Ocasek. He was forty at the time, and Porizkova was nineteen. The decades to come would bring marriage, motherhood, a budding writing career; and later sadness, loneliness, isolation, and eventually divorce. Following her ex-husband’s death—and the revelation of a deep betrayal—Porizkova stunned fans with her fierce vulnerability and disarming honesty as she let the whole world share in her experience of being a woman who must start over.

This is a wise and compelling exploration of heartbreak, grief, beauty, aging, relationships, re-invention and finding your purpose. In these essays, Porizkova bares her soul and shares the lessons she’s learned—often the hard way. After a lifetime of being looked at, she is ready to be heard.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Audiobook, Biography Memoir, Essays, Biography, Autobiography

240 pages, Hardcover

Published November 15, 2022

About the author

Paulina Porizkova, one of the original supermodels of the 1980s/1990s, appeared on two consecutive covers of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue, was twice chosen by People magazine as one of the "50 Most Beautiful People in the World," graced dozens of Vogue magazine covers, was the face of Estée Lauder, starred in several films, and was a judge on America's Next Top Model.

Paulina has written a novel, co-authored a children's book and contributed to an anthology of travel stories about her native country, the Czech Republic.

A voracious reader, she covers at least 100 titles a year.

Her latest op-ed can be found in The New York Times ("America Made Me a Feminist" June 2017).

Follow Paulina on Twitter, Instagram, FaceBook, and Goodreads.

Reviews

[Susie Stangland · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this cover to cover. Couldn’t put it down. I found her sincere and transparent. She lets herself be vulnerable to judgement but at the same time assumes so much reflective responsibility for the amount she acquiesced to boundaries her husband requested which hindered her career and lifelong savings, this reader felt empathetic and also recognizes she was so young. It was such a different time, the 80s. I appreciated how she openly discussed the concept of beauty, what it means. Her communist childhood and then her wealthy teen years were a fascinating contrast to read. I highly recommend her story as a fun revisit to American 80s icons and also a close look at a woman growing to independence.

[Mary · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was in college when Paulina met Ric making his bands’ MTV video so I was intrigued that she had written a book. Well, it’s not very well written. It’s a series of essays, not necessarily in chronological order. I didn’t mind this so much as the writing itself. This book felt like being tossed around in someone’s inner ramblings. Not fun! I think I read about her divorce/will battle at least four times! She uses far too much hyperbole and symbolism; I often had no idea what she’s talking about (what does it mean that some children learn to use the chimney to enter a house and that’s how she loved?). I don’t regret reading this, I learned a few things about Paulina, but I wouldn’t recommend it.

[M. Sarki · Rating 2 out of 5]

I appreciate what Paulina has achieved, her outspokenness, her life. But her story in essays is not interesting enough for me and there are so many better writers I prefer to read. I abandoned the book.

[Diem · Rating 4 out of 5]

So, I'll say it. This book surprised me. Because I don't think beautiful people can have depth and be skilled writers? No. Because I don't think models can have depth and be skilled writers? Closer. It's because I didn't think one of the industry's most in demand models would have the time or incentive to learn how to be a skilled writer.

Don't come at me. I have a nearly adult child who is a professional model and I have spent a bit of time learning about the industry and there is nothing about it that particularly encourages the participants to be curious about the world outside of the hustle. It doesn't actively discourage it, but if you're Paulina and you're working A LOT from the age of 15 into motherhood...well, I don't see where there's time to pursue almost anything else.

In the years since then, I don't know, I haven't followed her career but once you've been successful in one field it is unusual to decide to be good at something else.

But here she is, she took classes and worked at it for years and as it turns out, she's a polymath. What can you say? Sometimes nature gives with both hands...and then the gifted person puts in the work.

Porizkova is a story teller and has some very good insights about aging, about womanhood, about codependency, about totalitarianism, about anxiety disorder, about marriage, about divorce, about widowhood, about betrayal. Never preachy, never self-piteous, never taking herself too seriously. She neither assigns blame nor lets people off the hook. She has a very holistic approach to assessing the behavior of the people in her life. It's damn refreshing.

Who should read this? I really don't know. The book isn't necessarily about anything specific. It isn't specifically about modeling, or aging, or grief. Although those are all themes. It's just a very interesting collection of essays written by an astute observer of life who has seen things from a vantage point not many get to experience.

She was a fantastic reader, btw. Not all writers are.

[Katerina · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book leaves me with a certain indifference. Like a magazine at the hairdresser's. I don't get the meaning. No message I could receive. A little too much whining at high level.
The palm reading thing at the end kicked me out completely.

And then.... my perception of this time of socialism Paulina is writing about was really different. Where I grew up, it would never have occurred to me to report relatives or neighbor children to the Stasi. Paulina is only two years older than me. I find the portrayal of these events in Czechoslovakia questionable.

Overall, people age differently today than in my parents' generation. The natural aging process has also changed. People look better (aged less) now than they did back then. That's my impression.

In principle, I don't see anything wrong with women and men trying to slow down their aging process (healthy lifestyle, for example).

I wouldn't demonize Botox either. Botox doesn't erase beauty - it preserves it in my eyes. And beauty is not just a pretty face. It is the human being in its entirety. And if you hate your wrinkles, you're welcome to get rid of them.

So.... middle-aged women become invisible because they are no longer attractive... That statement just pisses me off. To be honest, at 55 I feel more visible than ever. In every relation. There's also an undeniable authority that I couldn't project in my 20's because I was a just a young chick.

I don't know what I expected. What I miss most is the depth. But that's probably in the nature of things. Beauty. I would have liked to get to the heart of the matter.

What crossed my mind last night: Paulina blames her mother for abandoning her in search of self-realization. Paulina's development was shaped to a decisive extent by this. Later in life, her husband complains about abandonment when Paulina breaks away from him in her personal development. So the circle seems to be closed. She should realize that because in her life glimpses it's all there.

[Melissa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I lost interest several times. For a short book, it seemed to drag. It felt very repetitive. Even the stories about her marriage weren’t that interesting. I appreciate her honesty relating to aging and beauty. But I was kinda just waiting for it to be over.

[Zibby Owens · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a memoir by the famous model, where she talks about her life, her modeling career, and the death of her husband. It also covered her early life and what it was like to live in the communist country of Czechoslovakia. This book had so many poignant and heartfelt moments. The author left nothing on the table. I learned so much about loss and grief, and heartbreak.

There were a lot of chapters or short essays where the author talked so much about what it was like to lose her husband and the public cutting out of his will and how the author dealt with that. It also covered her private pain and the public issues of being a public figure. One passage I loved was when she wrote, "While the physical pain of grief feels like a tall, strong, cold person gripping you from behind, arms crossed over your chest and forcing your air out, the pain of heartbreak is more immediate. It is someone plunging their hand into your chest, taking ahold of your heart and crushing it between their fingers."

To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://www.momsdonthavetimetoreadboo...

[Elizabeth Jorgensen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a book of essays, but unlike other books of essays I've read, this one follows a logical order. It felt more like a memoir, and I mean that as the highest compliment. This is a fast read -- and Paulina has created a compelling, interesting and well written book (although she only took four months to write it). It's part of the Open Field series by Maria Shriver.

NO FILTER is fascinating, well-done and emotional. I didn't know who The Cars were, nor her lover and husband Ric who she spends a lot of time exploring. I also wasn't aware of Paulina's level of social media notoriety. From Paulina, there is much to learn about growing, relationships, aging.

[Yuko Shimizu · Rating 5 out of 5]

OMG I freakin’ loved this book!
I’m not into celebrity memoirs, and I only picked it up because the books I have been reading lately were too intense and I needed something light.
Lots of wisdoms of life. What a woman.
You should pick it up too.

[Dyane Harwood · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I was a teen in the 80s, I rarely wrote fan letters, but when I did write them, I sent them to extraordinary women I admired, such as Madeleine L’Engle. (I received a lovely, handwritten reply.)

While our family drove drove from L.A. to the Sierras in an old Volvo station wagon, I painstakingly wrote Paulina Porizkova a fan letter in my Pentel rainbow-hued pens. I don’t know where I sent the letter, and I don’t know if she ever received it, but I was sad I never got a reply from a woman whose beauty reached out and somehow inspired me.

40 years letter, I am now a published author, freelance writer, and mental health/vegan advocate. I was thrilled that "No Filter” absolutely blew me away. The writing is nothing short of brilliant. Her experiences will remain with me for a long time, and although I never received the personal reply I had hoped for, “No Filter” has affected me in a profound way; I’ve gotten to know a bit of this amazing woman’s background and perspective that has helped me look at my own life differently, and with meaning. What a fantastic book. Thank you Paulina.

[melhara · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5

I didn't know who Paulina Porizkova was until she appeared on the Red Table Talk to promote this book. I really liked her personality and knew that I would be interested in reading her book (particularly the audiobook).

I quite enjoyed the audiobook. I listened at x1.2 speed which seems closer to Porizkova's regular speaking speed. She shared really interesting stories about leaving communist Czechoslovakia for Sweden, her experience in the modeling industry (and the sexual harassment that would occur), and her seemingly amicable separation from her husband and rock star Ric Ocasek which was complicated by his untimely death.

I thought Paulina was a good storyteller. I really enjoyed listening to her stories via audiobook - it was like listening to a friend or family telling me their drama-filled life story in an engaging way and imparting some of their wisdom.

[Janalee · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wish I knew who recommended this book. (Reads quickly in hours.) I have never heard of her or even recognized her as a world-famous model. But after reading her essays on life, she’s now my new friend.

Notes:

* On being a young model, who was mistreated and treated like a sex object by every male in the industry, including those photographing her: “In modeling, careers start young and often end young. When you are told the rules as a child, you don’t question them. I was told models had to be young, because their smooth skin reflected light in a way that older faces did not. But I suspect there is another, darker reason for having 17--year-olds hawking anti-wrinkle creams… why are there no women in modeling? Because a girl doesn’t know how to say no. A girl does not know her own power. A girl does not know her value. Because she wants people to like her, she puts up with things she never should have.”

*On being tall: “ you can make fun of a tall man, but his very essence, his masculinity, will never be questioned. When you make fun of a tall woman, you’re doing the exact opposite. By being tall, she has inadvertently stepped into the male domain. Short boys in school often become smart or funny or athletic to build them selves up. Tall girls have to lessen themselves, be less of everything”. Soon she realizes… “Tall women were powerful women. And only drew the man who were up to the challenge.”

* On the responsibility of beauty: “ Beauty is a gift. It’s neither an accomplishment nor a fault. Generally, if you are given a gift, your responsibility is to make use of it. When a person is born with an athletic or artistic ability and becomes a celebrated athlete or artist we don’t shame them for using their gift. If a child is intelligent we encourage them to get an education study hard develop their gift as much as possible, and use it to change the world. Wasted talent is a waste of potential. But when your gift is beauty, developing it is considered vain and narcissistic. Trying to maintain it is likewise shameful, whereas in athletics it’s practically heroic.”


“ Though beauty may be seen as a gift, beauty is also ambiguous and contradictory. It is subjective. The perception of beauty changes. Just in the past few decades we have gone from celebrating the 80s Glamazon to the 90s waifs to the 2000s enhanced curves. Being seen as beautiful is all about being in the right place at the right time with the right attributes. Had you plunked me down a century earlier, I would’ve been a sallow , forbiddingly tall, and angular woman with few marriageable prospects. After all, Van gogh had died penniless, unable to sell much of his art.”

On anxiety meds, lexapro: “ I spent two years with Lexapro, the most mellow two years of my life. My immediate frustrations were comforted, my resentments muffled, my anxiety calmed;I was wrapped in a thick warm comforter, insulated against the rough blows that came with living… but I was also insulated from fun things, like my creativity and my sexuality. I found I had no need to actually express anything. This is akin to a cook who has no appetite. Sure it’s possible to work, but the results will be uninspired at best. I felt emotionally Botoxed. Who was I under the blanket of medication? what did I really feel like? I begin to wonder and to want my feeling back even at the steep price of misery.”

“ i’m starting to wonder whether antidepressants can often be the emotional equivalent of plastic surgery for middle-aged women. With them, we can stave off the anguish of change; we can take breaks from the afflictions of living. But is it also possible that through the years, we pay another price: the price of going through life somewhat anesthetized?” Don’t worry , she acknowledges that it’s very necessary for some to survive.

[Lynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I listened to the audiobook and thoroughly enjoyed it. Growing up I absolutely idolised Paulina when she was one of the first "supermodels" gracing the covers of all the glossy mags my mom read and she was the face of Estee Lauder too. She just fascinated me and recently I stumbled upon on her Instagram and was amazed that she is now one of these older generation models that is supporting the "aging gracefully" campaign. To hear her narrating her story was such a treat.

[Andrea McDowell · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was fine. A bit uneven; surprisingly strong in some aspects, repetitive in others.

I was never aware of her marriage and had no idea who her husband is/was until I started following her on IG, so I'm probably not her target audience for the sections covering that relationship, its dissolution, his death and the revised will that so devastated her. I think there's a lot of material here to expand on this in a more meaningful way, but the pieces felt a bit short. That said, I appreciated the way she talked about her expectations about marriage and romance and how her childhood shaped her into someone who would accept what appears to be a very controlling relationship where she gave a lot away for little reward. Unlike some other reviewers, I perfectly understood her chimney-front door metaphor -- as someone who has largely made her peace with camping out in the backyards of the houses she wants inside of, to expand on that metaphor, I felt deeply about her struggles to unlearn decades of those patterns.

But her writing about her experiences with modelling were the real strength of the book for me. Not because of any salacious details about celebrities or photographers, parties or photo shoots, but because of how she reflects on how warped it is that our society's "ideal woman," as shaped by the men who control those industries, is a girl. Not just physically (slim, smooth, shiny, perky) but malleable, naïve, submissive. Boundaryless. Some of the anecdotes were both deeply disturbing and completely relatable. I'd like to believe things have changed (for all of us), but I'm not sure they have.

Rated three stars because some of the essays unrelated to those topics were a little flat for me. On the whole a quick read and worth reading, if either of the above subjects appeal to you.

[Laura Boyd · Rating 2 out of 5]

2 1/2 stars.
I really like her, but it was sad and frustrating how naive she was about money. I mean- she’s travelled the world and worked since she was 15, but then just seem to not use common sense after meeting Ric.
He comes across as a terrible, terrible person, and she didn’t even mention how awful he was to his first four sons who can’t stand him either.
It was just sad and frustrating.
👎🏻

[Joy Cantor · Rating 2 out of 5]

Very boring. A huge disappointment.
And I like her! Just very surface and a bore.

[Gina · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5+ stars

Paulina Porizkova's No Filter: The Good, The Bad, and The Beautiful is a collection of essays, and for me, essays as a genre are rather hit or miss. This was mostly a hit.

The essays are raw and beautiful. At times the lack of chronological consistency and the repetition confounded me. The stories of her childhood were so interesting and moving, and Pani Rusova is my favorite. I hope to be someone's Pani Rusova one day!

Frankly, this is a woman who experienced varying degrees of toxic and controlling "love" from an early age. At 57, she still does not see clearly that Ric Ocasek dressing her in his personal style, cutting her off from friends, cheating on his second wife with her, etc. was CONTROL, not love. I am not saying that he didn't love her, but she was a teenager dating a man twice her age, and reading her stories were like neon signs in Times Square -- CONTROL, CONTROL, CONTROL!

For the reading snobs who discount audiobooks as "not really reading", I say bosh! While I liked this book, I know that I would have enjoyed it more had Paulina narrated an audiobook. There is something very personal and moving about hearing an author give voice to their stories.

[Julia]

DNF at 12%. I had no idea who she was prior to this book so had no preconceived notions and I liked her message re beauty and ageing, but.... Whilst I liked her intro, the first few essays I read had a certain tone to them. Increasingly whiny. She keeps saying that she had no choices, things happened to her without her choice in the matter, but that's not really true, is it? Pursuing and staying in the modelling career was a choice, albeit a passive one. Going to a supermarket knowing your husband will be recognized and approached by random strangers is also a choice. Again, a passive one. There's a whiff of victim mentality here that I personally struggle to empathise with, perhaps because I'd gone through some similar situations (being uprooted as a child to a different country, unwanted and inappropriate "attention" from men as a teenager, lacking privacy is a claustrophobic community) in my life so I have a certain bias. So I'm just going to show myself out.

[Hana · Rating 2 out of 5]

The sections on her childhood in Czechoslovakia were mildly interesting, but overall really nothing new to add here

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s easy to hate this woman. Rich, famous, gorgeous and married to a rock star. What could she have to complain about?
Plenty. Read the chapter called Occupied and imagine living like that. Escape to Sweden where things should be wonderful but they aren’t. Imagine being left alone to care for your baby brother for two weeks while mom has her breakdown. Creepy photographers. Controlling husband. Lifelong anxiety.
She’s brave to write this. You never really know what is going on with anyone. Hope she gains some self confidence and finds true love.

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

you cant even say this is the story of a model who married a rockstar and her life in that crazy celebrity world. there’s so much more to this book and so much more to paulina as a person. there’s so many beautiful essays that i think everyone can relate to in someway. she said she wanted to write a book that would show people that they’re not alone and they’re not hopeless while battling through whatever darkness they’re facing. that is exactly what this book is

[Steph · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this was an interesting look into Paulina Porizkova’s life. She became a model at such a young age and in the decade of excess (the 80s). I appreciated her honesty as she looked back at growing up and discovering who she was and how she got to where she is now. The essays cover a lot of info but some things aren’t fully discussed. Enjoyable read that celebrity memoir fans will enjoy.

[Erin Mulcahy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just meh, today it’s raining out so this book is like the weather, makes me want to yawn. All very surface level and jumps around to different periods in her life

[Tanya · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very quick read - essays totaling 155 pages. Reserved and read from my library app.
Paulina is a good writer - I've read some of her essays before. She is very open and forthright - about her childhood, her career, her marriage. About being gifted with great beauty and growing older without a lot of procedures. Contemplating if her former career (model) is part of the problem driving women to try and hold back the hands of time.

Frank talk about growing up. Bottom line: All women who are married are in a sense, married to children. Sorry fellas, it's true. And we have to learn to be strong, to be resilient, and to try and forge a life of our own without someone trying to control us.

The part about her older neighbor in Czechoslovakia who wrapped oat kernels in candy foil really moved me. I'd love to include a picture of the craft here but Google it - "oats wrapped in foil." There is a big stock image available. Those who have the least in life make the most of what they have. That story really touched me.

[H · Rating 3 out of 5]

The parts of the book about the author's life are rather sad and sweet and heartbreaking. Her adult life and especially her almost ex husband cutting her out of her will is also very sad. The book jumps around a little too much for my taste, but the parts that about her life are sad.

I found that he constant need to have men find her desirable to be a product of a society in which young and beautiful women receive all the attention that they could ever want to the detriment of older or less attractive women. She was at the top of everything. She has had men find her desirable her whole life.

What I have a problem with is her talking about her own beauty. It was in the best case inappropriate and in the worst cases insulting and pathetic. She surely earned a substantial amount of money thanks to her beauty in a world and especially a country that puts the highest premium of all on youth and physical beauty. She was sitting on top of the heap. Most women would have loved to have been that beautiful and most every man would kill just to have a coffee with her. Don't tell us that you didn't enjoy the beauty of youth, you just wanted to be a 'wise older woman.' Come on.

The worst part is when she tries to reassure women that the signs of age on their faces should be worn as badges of courage (like "crepy skin looks like silk sheets," "lip lines are a sign of too much kissing"). It is clear in looking at Ms. Porizkova's face that she probably gets her share of Fraxel, Vivace, Botox, lip injections, Voluma, Ultherapy and Novothreads. It is hard to hear someone tell us that we should be happy aging graceful when she works as hard as she does to look as good as she does. I found her thoughts about her beauty to sound spoiled and disingenuous.

[Joanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Different and smart memoir in that it’s written in essays, then organized in neither a biographical or even logical outline.

Paulina speaks about fame, as she’s never not been famous having been a celebrated Czech child refugee in Europe since she was eight. And includes many of her thoughts on her ‘objectification’ stemming from her beauty and being a model and subsequently, always being seen-yet-not-heard: all made for insightful reading.

Her husband, The Cars’ Ric Ocasek’s, death seems to have been the propelling release Paulina needed to get her honest and emotional views on mental health, combatting relationships as an ‘occupying force’, and the invisibility that accompanies aging down on paper, and we all can benefit. She’s bold, often swims against the stream, and as Paulina herself would say, you’ll probably be surprised at how well she writes. In fact, I think there was a chapter specifically about that!

[Jocie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Compilation of essays. I had heard about her husband cutting her out of his will right before he died. They adored each other, but he also was immature and controlling (told her what to wear, what jobs to take, had her cut off all of her friends that were guys, controlled the money and made it seem like her financial contribution was small). I think they really loved each other, but he was obsessive and she finally (decades later) pushed back against being controlled. Instead of choosing to grow up he withdrew to punish her and they eventually separated.

I was very surprised about her perspective on her parents. They rescued her from Soviet-controlled czechoslovakia (years after they initially left her behind), but she wished they hadn't as her grandma was actually the only one who adored her and her parents separated as soon as they brought her to Sweden. She struggled with feeling wanted her whole life, and thus the reason Ric Ocasek's obsessive type love was appealing to her.

[Suzyq · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm about the same age as Paulina, and always considered her the most naturally beautiful among the supermodels of the 80's. I remember early interviews from that era for her unusual candor and thoughtfulness. She never seemed that impressed by the "glamour" of her business; always talked about it like a job. I enjoyed this book for the same things I always appreciated about her: she's brutally honest, with herself and the reader, and she's become a really good writer. Her European sensibility is different from American ideas about family and self. However, spending an entire book with her wasn't very fun. She's a serious-minded woman with a life that's had deeply sad events in it. I appreciated the book more than I enjoyed it.

[Beth Tomkiw · Rating 4 out of 5]

I follow Paulina on Instagram and admire her commitment to aging gracefully. Had I not red this book, I would have always considered her a gorgeous woman of privilege who lived a charmed life. I still think she is gorgeous, but she is like most of us: a woman who faces insecurities and lots of emotional ups and downs. Paulina bares her life and soul in this book. Gratefully, through her “filter,” I find it easier to be kind to myself and appreciate my beauty as I approach my 60th circle around the sun. Thank you, Paulina. I wish we could meet so I could thank you in person. We are all beautiful. And there is liberation in becoming invisible.

[Alli James · Rating 4 out of 5]

I listened to this on Audible and I was impressed with how intelligent and well spoken Paulina is (she is definitely not just another pretty face). I love her aging-positive stance and her journey to self confidence and feeling beautiful in her own 57 yo skin (she is the same age as me). I can't give this 5 stars, however, because Paulina keeps circling back to the betrayal by her husband Ric Ocasek (I mean, he did indeed betray her, but I just want to encourage her to let that shit goooooooo). This was a short listen, fewer that six hours if I recall correctly. It left me wanting more.