Building a bodyguard to kill your aristocratic niece’s vengeful ex-husband should be easy for a witch.
All you need is the right body and the right magic, and soon you have a mindless killer to do your bidding.
Of course, it all depends on what the butler brings back from the cemetery.
For Frances Stein, reanimating the dead is one thing, but convincing the corpse there’s life after death is another. Finding out he’s neither mindless nor killer is something else entirely.
Especially when he’s her last hope, because they both have a limited lifespan, and time is literally running out…
In the town of Maund, the independent-minded Lady Rosalind Stein is married to Lord Rudolf Dibkiss, a thoroughly nasty personality with few friends, following an arrangement made between Rudolf and her father. In fact they’ve been married for several years, but Rosa has never allowed her husband to consummate their marriage.
The book starts explosively when Rudolf blows up Rosa’s alchemical laboratory whilst trying to make a love potion. Luckily the rest of the castle is still intact, and Rosa is soon able to establish a new laboratory for herself – once she’s ejected her unpleasant husband from the castle, which is her property. This sets the scene for Rudolf to spend the rest of the book trying to kill her in order to inherit Castle Stein.
The author employs solid story-telling techniques to tell this tale, told in the authorial narration style. The book has a feminist streak which I appreciate greatly. Characters fulfil their roles as much as in any plot-driven story, but also have a life of their own due to careful character-building.
In a nearby cottage lives Lady Rosalind’s Aunt Fran, a witch by profession. That should tell you to expect some serious magic, and sheds some light on Rosa’s leanings in this direction. We first meet Fran’s familiar Sooty in the guise of a white lion, but this chatty, shapeshifting kitty can adopt a new identity as a white domestic cat for everyday (and espionage) purposes. Aunt Fran has a sense of humour, though, and this leads to some fun when she sells up and takes Sooty with her to live with Rosa, determined to protect her niece from Rudolf at all costs.
Meanwhile (and I do mean ’mean’!), Rudolf settles down to a new life based in the local hostelry, accompanied on and off by his only friends, fellow aristocrats, Yedder and Guildman. He would have them believe he’s there to instruct them in techniques for being a lord. But Guildman has a secret of his own…
Don’t read this book if you don’t enjoy a blend of humour, fantasy, and a sprinkling of humanity mixed in. Don’t read it if you don’t like everyday settings in a fantasy world, with characters ranging from kind to evil to ingenious. I’m not much into fantastical humour fiction, although I once sat next to the very witty and lovely Terry Pratchett at dinner, and found him even more amusing in the flesh; but this book kept me reading, and gave me several days’ worth of enjoyment to start the day!
So if you enjoy fun situations in extraordinary settings, with larger than life characters and witty presentation, then do go buy it and read it. You won’t regret it!
Lady Rosalind Dibkiss has finally kicked her worthless husband out of her ancestral castle and decided to live for herself, conducting alchemical experiments and haranguing her resident builder into maybe repairing a tower the worthless husband destroyed. The worthless husband, in turn, has decided that he needs to retake the castle and kill his wife with the dubious aid of two old army chums. Witch Frances Stein, Lady Roz’s dying aunt, has decided that the best way to protect her niece from the rapidly escalating schemes of the worthless husband is to reanimate a corpse and convince it to be a bodyguard and protect Rosalind, her castle, and everyone in it.
Written with wit, warmth, and whimsical logic, Twicetime is everything you want from a fairytale for grown-ups. There is love and humor and heartache all on the page, and Carman handles each with a deft touch as she weaves between the dark absurdity of the worthless husband’s spiraling pathology, the allies working to protect Rosalind’s castle, and the steadily ticking down of Frances’ life.
Mature without taking itself too seriously, melodramatic but in ways you are not expecting, and written with a true heart for the world she has built, this is only Carol Carman’s second outing as a novelist, but if Twicetime is the standard she writes to now, her future can only be bright.
A great read if you like witty banter and one-liners in your fantasy books.
I met Carol Carman at an Alternative Fayre and after reading the blurb of this book, I was immediately intrigued and decided to buy a copy. It was so lovely to have it signed too.
I was not disappointed. Strong, no-nonsense women, a murderous ex-husband, some loyal servants, and a “monster” with a heart of gold. Throw in some mad capers, some Lords with more money than sense, a semi-retired witch, a talking cat and you’ve got Twicetime.
If you like Terry Pratchett’s work then you’ll find this to be of a similar style - thoroughly enjoyable. I’m not going to spoil it, just go and read it.
A verging on the bizarre 'magical fantasy' novel that defies our logic, while it's feet planted firmly on the ground, and being sustained by strong tea in copious quantities.
The writer pokes fun at men who haven't quite grown up, with classic one-liners, a razor sharp wit for the absurd, humour that's as sharp as a scalpel and glitters brightly as it shows us human nature laid bare, but her understanding of what makes us tick is spot on.
Has all the classic tropes of a fairy tale with an enduring caste all finding their way to their own fulfilment.
ps, talking of 'fairy tales', it's a great Edith Nesbit type ending. Let that be a lesson to him.