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The Sensitive Ones: Healing and Understanding Your Child's Mental Health
"Stop trying to fix me." Years into her daughter Ellie's mental health journey, this statement stopped Heather Nardi in her tracks.
Ellie was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and spent years in traditional treatment with prescription medications, therapy, and outpatient and inpatient facilities.
But she wasn't getting better. And Heather intuitively knew there had to be another way.
What Heather discovered was life-changing: her child's symptoms that were unsuccessfully treated as a disorder were―in fact―traits of an empath and highly sensitive person (HSP). And they were traits that Heather herself shared.
Now a speaker and life coach known as "The Empath Mama," Heather Nardi is a fierce advocate for other families shifting the story from "disorder" to "trait."
Inside this parenting advice book for the highly sensitive child and empath, find:
-an introduction to HSP (highly sensitive person) and empath characteristics and why they are commonly misdiagnosed as mental illness,
-parenting tips for avoiding frustration and stress by embracing sensitivity as a gift,
-coping skills for overwhelm and overstimulation, like routines, space for quiet time, and creative outlets,
-how to advocate for your child by becoming an expert in their needs, and
-holistic health pathways like diet, animal therapy, mindfulness, and spiritual practices.
Understanding and acceptance can heal the past and present. The Sensitive Ones is an honest first-hand account of how one mother learned to embrace her and her daughter's sensitivity so they could both live healthy, empowered lives.
Fans of The Highly Sensitive Child and Sensitive is the New Strong will feel empowered as parents to their highly sensitive child.
Ellie was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and spent years in traditional treatment with prescription medications, therapy, and outpatient and inpatient facilities.
But she wasn't getting better. And Heather intuitively knew there had to be another way.
What Heather discovered was life-changing: her child's symptoms that were unsuccessfully treated as a disorder were―in fact―traits of an empath and highly sensitive person (HSP). And they were traits that Heather herself shared.
Now a speaker and life coach known as "The Empath Mama," Heather Nardi is a fierce advocate for other families shifting the story from "disorder" to "trait."
Inside this parenting advice book for the highly sensitive child and empath, find:
-an introduction to HSP (highly sensitive person) and empath characteristics and why they are commonly misdiagnosed as mental illness,
-parenting tips for avoiding frustration and stress by embracing sensitivity as a gift,
-coping skills for overwhelm and overstimulation, like routines, space for quiet time, and creative outlets,
-how to advocate for your child by becoming an expert in their needs, and
-holistic health pathways like diet, animal therapy, mindfulness, and spiritual practices.
Understanding and acceptance can heal the past and present. The Sensitive Ones is an honest first-hand account of how one mother learned to embrace her and her daughter's sensitivity so they could both live healthy, empowered lives.
Fans of The Highly Sensitive Child and Sensitive is the New Strong will feel empowered as parents to their highly sensitive child.
- GenresNonfictionParenting
160 pages, Paperback
Published April 12, 2022
77 people are currently reading
99 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
December 5, 2025
I really enjoyed reading this book about the author's journey to find a path forward with her daughter's very young diagnosis of mental health issues at the age of 8 years old.
The key recommendations are sound: listen to your intuition, listen to your child, listen to your family, learn to be resilient and find comfort, strength and courage in modalities that feel right to you (within reason).
The book repeated a lot of information and I felt as though the author perpetuated some negative stereotypes or information even as she extolled the value of her own personal spiritual journey. While she relates the story of a shift in her daughter at age 14 after being sent off to an in-patient clinical setting as having blossomed and grown into a highly sensitive empath, she still continues to refer to her daughter as having mental health issues.
I felt like the author should choose -- is this a person with a mental health issue -- or is this a misunderstood sensitive empath? Sure, it can be both - but it seems to me that if she's quit all her medications, quit therapy and is using crystals and flower essences and coping mechanisms for resilience, maybe she isn't and never was suffering a mental health issue?
The author relates a story about how a social worker sent to her home interviewed her and said "I think that it's your parenting that is causing these issues." The author was destroyed by this assessment - but then goes on to describe how her husband's more structured parenting style and her own laissez-faire style created confusion for her daughter and resulted in some of the behavior that was observed. So, maybe, yes -- this was the result of contradictory parenting styles. It's better to find out sooner than later -- and, I should imagine, if she's so self-aware and open minded that she's willing to seek out a medium and the advice of angels or ghosts, she might also be willing to examine how her own behavior and choices had an impact on her daughter.
ORIGINAL URL: http://www.livegreenwearblack.com/202...
© Jennifer R Clark. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License. You may share and adapt this content with proper attribution
The key recommendations are sound: listen to your intuition, listen to your child, listen to your family, learn to be resilient and find comfort, strength and courage in modalities that feel right to you (within reason).
The book repeated a lot of information and I felt as though the author perpetuated some negative stereotypes or information even as she extolled the value of her own personal spiritual journey. While she relates the story of a shift in her daughter at age 14 after being sent off to an in-patient clinical setting as having blossomed and grown into a highly sensitive empath, she still continues to refer to her daughter as having mental health issues.
I felt like the author should choose -- is this a person with a mental health issue -- or is this a misunderstood sensitive empath? Sure, it can be both - but it seems to me that if she's quit all her medications, quit therapy and is using crystals and flower essences and coping mechanisms for resilience, maybe she isn't and never was suffering a mental health issue?
The author relates a story about how a social worker sent to her home interviewed her and said "I think that it's your parenting that is causing these issues." The author was destroyed by this assessment - but then goes on to describe how her husband's more structured parenting style and her own laissez-faire style created confusion for her daughter and resulted in some of the behavior that was observed. So, maybe, yes -- this was the result of contradictory parenting styles. It's better to find out sooner than later -- and, I should imagine, if she's so self-aware and open minded that she's willing to seek out a medium and the advice of angels or ghosts, she might also be willing to examine how her own behavior and choices had an impact on her daughter.
ORIGINAL URL: http://www.livegreenwearblack.com/202...
© Jennifer R Clark. This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License. You may share and adapt this content with proper attribution
January 7, 2024
My intuition is sometimes very wrong when choosing books to read 🙄
March 31, 2022
I am so thankful that Heather Nardi chose to share her experiences and those of her family in this poignant and honest book. Her daughter was diagnosed with a mental illness at 8 years old and she first sought to help via the route of mainstream medicine. However, with her steady decline after years of being medicated, with often terrifying side effects, she felt compelled to try a different approach. She began to focus on first addressing her own childhood traumas and current issues, which led to understanding her child better. Learning more about highly sensitive empathetic people, she realized that her and her daughter both fit the description. This knowledge played a key role in how she changed how she approached parenting a gifted and “different” child.
After her daughter told her she wanted to get off all medication she started looking into more holistic approaches. What I loved about this book was that Nardi was not pushy at all with her views. So many books nowadays are either extremely pro-medicine or the opposite-trying to shove holistic practices down your throat as the be all end all. This is not that. Nardi simply explains how she tried a number of different things and what worked for her family specifically. I appreciated that she was very aware that every person is different with different and ever changing needs. Personally, a lot of the things she wrote about really resonated with me. Finding a balance between spiritual, mental and emotional well being and the different ways you can do that. She emphasized how helpful shadow work, meditation, Reiki and essential oils helped her. I also enjoyed the connections she made between empaths sometimes being more prone to experience psychic abilities or seeing flutters from the other side. While I understand some people may scoff at these types of ideas I believe there is a need for a balance between logical and spiritual emotional views. All in all, this book brought me joy and made me feel optimistic about my ability to stop the cycle of generational trauma within my own family.
After her daughter told her she wanted to get off all medication she started looking into more holistic approaches. What I loved about this book was that Nardi was not pushy at all with her views. So many books nowadays are either extremely pro-medicine or the opposite-trying to shove holistic practices down your throat as the be all end all. This is not that. Nardi simply explains how she tried a number of different things and what worked for her family specifically. I appreciated that she was very aware that every person is different with different and ever changing needs. Personally, a lot of the things she wrote about really resonated with me. Finding a balance between spiritual, mental and emotional well being and the different ways you can do that. She emphasized how helpful shadow work, meditation, Reiki and essential oils helped her. I also enjoyed the connections she made between empaths sometimes being more prone to experience psychic abilities or seeing flutters from the other side. While I understand some people may scoff at these types of ideas I believe there is a need for a balance between logical and spiritual emotional views. All in all, this book brought me joy and made me feel optimistic about my ability to stop the cycle of generational trauma within my own family.
April 11, 2022
The sensitive ones by Heather Nardi is an emotional read which digs into a mothers journey of supporting her empathic daughter. This book is brimming with heartfelt writing which I fell in love with within the first few pages of this book.
I have my own experiences with mental health difficulties, and could resonate to the author’s daughter, Ellie on a deep level. It soon became apparent how similar my own life has been thus far, when compared to Ellie’s. Reading this book and about the author's experience, gave me the interesting point of view of those surrounding myself: What is their experience like living with me, a person who is mentally ill? Heather Nardi excels at showcasing her perspective as the mother of Ellie in this book.
This book has a definite balance between experience and knowledge, with some of the book dipping into the author's experiences, and some delving into key tips for readers trying to support themselves or their emotional children.
I also think that this book does an excellent job at discussing science with spirituality using a sensitive tone, through acknowledgement of medicine as a tool for helping those with mental illness, but also through sharing holistic healing options.
This is a well written book which combines the perspectives of a daughter with mental illness but also everyone around her as well. Furthermore I liked that the sibling point of view was shown in the more practical side of the book.
Overall I think this book is an explorative read about empaths, highly sensitive individuals and also those who have increased emotions. I believe that many can benefit from reading this: those in a similar situation and for those who feel or wish to be more spiritually aligned in general. Thankyou to Netgalley, Heather Nardi and Wise Ink Creative Publishing for the DRC!
I have my own experiences with mental health difficulties, and could resonate to the author’s daughter, Ellie on a deep level. It soon became apparent how similar my own life has been thus far, when compared to Ellie’s. Reading this book and about the author's experience, gave me the interesting point of view of those surrounding myself: What is their experience like living with me, a person who is mentally ill? Heather Nardi excels at showcasing her perspective as the mother of Ellie in this book.
This book has a definite balance between experience and knowledge, with some of the book dipping into the author's experiences, and some delving into key tips for readers trying to support themselves or their emotional children.
I also think that this book does an excellent job at discussing science with spirituality using a sensitive tone, through acknowledgement of medicine as a tool for helping those with mental illness, but also through sharing holistic healing options.
This is a well written book which combines the perspectives of a daughter with mental illness but also everyone around her as well. Furthermore I liked that the sibling point of view was shown in the more practical side of the book.
Overall I think this book is an explorative read about empaths, highly sensitive individuals and also those who have increased emotions. I believe that many can benefit from reading this: those in a similar situation and for those who feel or wish to be more spiritually aligned in general. Thankyou to Netgalley, Heather Nardi and Wise Ink Creative Publishing for the DRC!
April 18, 2022
Overall this is a powerful testimony of a mother and her family history as she recounts her struggle with her daughter's mental health challenges. Her daughter is considered an "empath", a term not always used or understood, yet the premise of this book.
The mother describes how her daughter's struggles were misunderstood by the inconsistent medical system. I can relate and appreciate the bottom line discussions of reminding us what is important (family), with actionable ways to advocate for ourselves in effort to avoid the codependent realm.
I do appreciate most of the spiritual discussion, though admittedly believe the granular level of talk about crystals and essential oils, etc. is a bit deeper than I'd like, and to me detracts from the read. I understand that's my opinion, and I understand the value for the author.
I appreciate and learned much from the discussion of "empathy" and "highly sensitive" children. Further, this has sparked me too look into some other books that she uses as a reference to continue this discussion.
The mother describes how her daughter's struggles were misunderstood by the inconsistent medical system. I can relate and appreciate the bottom line discussions of reminding us what is important (family), with actionable ways to advocate for ourselves in effort to avoid the codependent realm.
I do appreciate most of the spiritual discussion, though admittedly believe the granular level of talk about crystals and essential oils, etc. is a bit deeper than I'd like, and to me detracts from the read. I understand that's my opinion, and I understand the value for the author.
I appreciate and learned much from the discussion of "empathy" and "highly sensitive" children. Further, this has sparked me too look into some other books that she uses as a reference to continue this discussion.
April 24, 2022
In this honest and soul nourishing book, the author guides you through her child’s journey with mental illness. She authentically shares the moments that led to momentous growth and the big emotions she navigated along the way as a parent. This book is about more than mental health. It beautifully depicts the path of a highly sensitive mother and daughter as they heal and discover who they truly are. Whether you are navigating mental illness in your family, you feel you or your child may be highly sensitive, or you're simply ready to reconnect with your authentic self, this book is a must read!
December 31, 2024
Wow! I needed this. Fantastic read for those who are highly sensitive empaths. I highlighted and bookmarked so many key points I resonated with. Amazing! 😊
March 9, 2025
I really struggled with whether or not to review this book. But I made a promise to myself to review every book I read this year, and a goal to hit 30+.
I have read dozens of parenting books, and dozens more of “self-help” books, and I would not recommend this to anyone without first making sure they understood what they were getting into.
This book is not what it purports to be. I would estimate that about 10-15% is actually about the child in question. It felt like the other 80%+ feels like a self-aggrandizing ego trip about how great the author is for overcoming so much adversity and self-doubt.
It also isn’t about understanding a highly-sensitive child in the common parlance and understanding of that term. Rather, the author takes ‘sensitivity’ and ‘empathy’ to a whole new “new-age” level.
I won’t denigrate others’ beliefs—this was not at all for me—but if you believe in healing crystals, mediums, Reiki, and other similar so-called “new age” things, this might be the book for you. I was looking for something to help me understand my sensitive son, a child who is more sensitive than his peers—that’s it. This was not that book at all.
While I understand that the author speaks of her own experience as a self-diagnosed “highly sensitive empath”, that’s not a path to understanding a child, that’s a path to understanding oneself. Put simply, this is an EXTREMELY niche book. If you fall within that minuscule portion of society, this book may help you—and it is generally well-written enough. If, however, you are not a plant of that niche, I would recommend you find another avenue to try to better understand your sensitive child.
I have read dozens of parenting books, and dozens more of “self-help” books, and I would not recommend this to anyone without first making sure they understood what they were getting into.
This book is not what it purports to be. I would estimate that about 10-15% is actually about the child in question. It felt like the other 80%+ feels like a self-aggrandizing ego trip about how great the author is for overcoming so much adversity and self-doubt.
It also isn’t about understanding a highly-sensitive child in the common parlance and understanding of that term. Rather, the author takes ‘sensitivity’ and ‘empathy’ to a whole new “new-age” level.
I won’t denigrate others’ beliefs—this was not at all for me—but if you believe in healing crystals, mediums, Reiki, and other similar so-called “new age” things, this might be the book for you. I was looking for something to help me understand my sensitive son, a child who is more sensitive than his peers—that’s it. This was not that book at all.
While I understand that the author speaks of her own experience as a self-diagnosed “highly sensitive empath”, that’s not a path to understanding a child, that’s a path to understanding oneself. Put simply, this is an EXTREMELY niche book. If you fall within that minuscule portion of society, this book may help you—and it is generally well-written enough. If, however, you are not a plant of that niche, I would recommend you find another avenue to try to better understand your sensitive child.
April 10, 2022
Thank you to NetGalley for a free eARC copy of this book, in exchange for my honest review.
The most important thing I learned from this book is: you have to work on your own shit to help those around you. It's something I've learned in therapy, grad school, preach at work... and is the central theme in this book.
I could only give Nardi two stars for this book. Her story is her story... and I found a lot of scientific inaccuracies. That doesn't mean she didn't experience what she did-- I truly believe her family's journey as presented. I just worry that desperate parents might grasp at this narrative when what their child needs is traditional intervention (not even medication-- therapy).
The most important thing I learned from this book is: you have to work on your own shit to help those around you. It's something I've learned in therapy, grad school, preach at work... and is the central theme in this book.
I could only give Nardi two stars for this book. Her story is her story... and I found a lot of scientific inaccuracies. That doesn't mean she didn't experience what she did-- I truly believe her family's journey as presented. I just worry that desperate parents might grasp at this narrative when what their child needs is traditional intervention (not even medication-- therapy).
August 15, 2024
The author uses her experience coping with her daughter's mental illness, and the discoveries she made about her daughter and herself in the process, to provide guidance for how to function as a highly sensitive person or an empath and how to parent a child who is highly sensitive or empathic. The author and her husband utilized the traditional mental health treatment model for their daughter, and at one point it was even necessary for their daughter (Ellie) to undergo a prolonged stay in a mental health institution as a young teenager. However, the traditional approach was not working well for them. The medications made Ellie feel like a zombie or had other undesirable side effects. Benefits of treatment were often short-lived because the treatments did not adequately account for how Ellie experienced things emotionally, and did not provide her with the tools she needed to adequate cope with her environment. In trying to better understand herself and her daughter and find a way to more effectively help her daughter, the author explored various holistic treatment options and learned about the concepts of "highly sensitive child/person" and "empath."
The author starts out the book by recounting the moment when her ten-year-old daughter yelled at her, "Stop trying to fix me." It took a couple more years before the author realized what her daughter was really trying to stay. The author discusses how traditional western healthcare, especially mental health care, is focused on "fixing" the patient, as if the patient is just a problem that needs to be solved. However, Ellie did not need to be "fixed" but rather she needed to be accepted for who she was and given the tools to successfully function as someone who was highly sensitive. The author does not deny the benefits of medication, psychotherapy, etc., but encourages people to consider other treatment modalities, in addition to or possibly in place of the traditional model.
The reader will need to keep an open mind. Some of the things the author talks about doing/trying will sound very "woo woo" to many readers. There were multiple occasions where the author discussed something she explored/tried, and I instinctively thought that was "crazy", and I had to remind myself to step back and be open to the possibility that there might be something to what she was talking about.
In addition to encouraging readers to be open to other possible treatment options, the author provides a lot of advice, based on her own experience and what she has learned from others, about parenting a sensitive or empathic child, advocating for yourself and your child, how to manage your own self-care so you can be there for your child, how to help siblings cope with the situation and how to ensure that the needs of the siblings are not overlooked due to the focus on the highly sensitive child, finding a supportive community, etc.
The author starts out the book by recounting the moment when her ten-year-old daughter yelled at her, "Stop trying to fix me." It took a couple more years before the author realized what her daughter was really trying to stay. The author discusses how traditional western healthcare, especially mental health care, is focused on "fixing" the patient, as if the patient is just a problem that needs to be solved. However, Ellie did not need to be "fixed" but rather she needed to be accepted for who she was and given the tools to successfully function as someone who was highly sensitive. The author does not deny the benefits of medication, psychotherapy, etc., but encourages people to consider other treatment modalities, in addition to or possibly in place of the traditional model.
The reader will need to keep an open mind. Some of the things the author talks about doing/trying will sound very "woo woo" to many readers. There were multiple occasions where the author discussed something she explored/tried, and I instinctively thought that was "crazy", and I had to remind myself to step back and be open to the possibility that there might be something to what she was talking about.
In addition to encouraging readers to be open to other possible treatment options, the author provides a lot of advice, based on her own experience and what she has learned from others, about parenting a sensitive or empathic child, advocating for yourself and your child, how to manage your own self-care so you can be there for your child, how to help siblings cope with the situation and how to ensure that the needs of the siblings are not overlooked due to the focus on the highly sensitive child, finding a supportive community, etc.
May 4, 2022
Overall, I found this to be a pretty powerful testimony of a mother and her family as she they maneuvered around her daughter's mental health challenges.
Personally, I was interested and invested in her story and their journey. For such a highly developed country, our medical system leaves a lot to be desired. My favorite part of the book were the actionable ways to advocate for ourselves and our loved ones when it comes to our medical care and treatments. I was right there with her until... I wasn't. Once she refocused her discussion to crystals and mediums and essential oils, my skepticism took over and I lost interest/focus.
Overall, this was interesting read with some useful nuggets of information.
Many thanks to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for the advanced e-copy of this book in exchange for an honest opinion.
Personally, I was interested and invested in her story and their journey. For such a highly developed country, our medical system leaves a lot to be desired. My favorite part of the book were the actionable ways to advocate for ourselves and our loved ones when it comes to our medical care and treatments. I was right there with her until... I wasn't. Once she refocused her discussion to crystals and mediums and essential oils, my skepticism took over and I lost interest/focus.
Overall, this was interesting read with some useful nuggets of information.
Many thanks to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for the advanced e-copy of this book in exchange for an honest opinion.
March 22, 2024
Sensitive without viybdarues
This book wasn't really about Ellie as much as it was about how the author coped and learned from her experience with her daughter. She gave in a lot with her child and didn't set clear boundaries when she was young. This shifts as Nardi becomes more educated about mental illness and empathy. I didn't agree with the spiritual parts because of having a far different fath in Christianity than what she described. The suggestions on how to help yourself and your child were a good touch.
If you are divorced, this book won't work for you. A cohesive family unit is a large part of the book.
This book wasn't really about Ellie as much as it was about how the author coped and learned from her experience with her daughter. She gave in a lot with her child and didn't set clear boundaries when she was young. This shifts as Nardi becomes more educated about mental illness and empathy. I didn't agree with the spiritual parts because of having a far different fath in Christianity than what she described. The suggestions on how to help yourself and your child were a good touch.
If you are divorced, this book won't work for you. A cohesive family unit is a large part of the book.
January 26, 2023
I myself can relate to many of the instances her daughter delt with. I feel like the author still feels that her daughter has a mental illness even though she says that she is an empath herself, because she constantly says her daughter has a mental illness.
February 26, 2023
The Sensitive Ones:Healing andUnderstanding Your Child's Mental Health
Helpful for parents to learn more about handling their sensitive children. Good recommendations. THIS book is for newbies in parenting special kids.
Helpful for parents to learn more about handling their sensitive children. Good recommendations. THIS book is for newbies in parenting special kids.
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews