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Where I Was: A Memoir About Forgetting and Remembering
Where I Was: A Memoir About Forgetting and Remembering is a rich and compelling account of the life of an extraordinary woman. In a land of many cultures, races, and religions; in a state where politics and public policies impinge, sometimes callously, on the daily lives of its denizens, Constance captures through humorous and moving accounts the images of the people, places and events that are the source of her most powerful memories. These images are connected to key turning points in her personal journey, set against or within the context of important historical events. In this reissue of her 2013 memoir, Constance reflects on current advocacy movements and on the events that led to the AWARE saga that would shape the rest of her life.
- GenresNonfiction
300 pages, Paperback
Published March 1, 2022
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
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March 28, 2022Phenomenal. I adore how this is also a love letter to the books, ideas, and quotes that have stayed with Constance throughout her life. I was also surprised to read that several of AWARE’s events in its early days were held in public libraries like Queenstown and Marine Parade! Surely this has to do with having a feminist librarian in charge, i.e. Hedwig Anuar. What an idea — that our libraries can also be spaces for community and civil society.
April 9, 2022
I once had the privilege of attending a writing workshop Constance hosted in person at the AWARE centre for members. Her work with AWARE and civil society is dear to me and invaluable to many others. You often hear about her from the perspective of others, so I did enjoy reading about her life and achievements through her own perspective.
In Where I Was, Constance Singam maps out her life and experiences through key events - starting from when her childhood in Kerala when her family moved back because of the Japanese occupation in Singapore, in Singapore as a young woman and marriage to N.T.R. Singam, her life overseas after the death of her husband at a young age, and her rich life in activism and civil society soon after leading up to the present. She weaves commentary on key historical events into the memoir as well, such as Operation Spectrum and Coldstore, how PAP came into power, the merger and separation from Malaysia, the AWARE saga.
History comes alive through firsthand accounts but I must admit I didn't truly understand how that is until I read this memoir. It's fascinating to be able to capture a slice of time through the little experiences - the commentary of cab drivers allowing a glimpse into the worries and beliefs of Singapore's working class back then, how she had to drive to the library during lunchtime to get a handwritten letter typed by the librarian, how Singaporeans live in real fear of the police if you dared to support the opposition party. I know AWARE's history pretty well but I really felt like I was there with her. She talked about how fearful some of the members were after one member was detained by the ISA, how friends advised her to stop her work. She talked about how the first panel AWARE held at the library garnered only 5 interested participants, but eventually grew to massive movements. She talked about her nervousness speaking in public, which is surprising because she speaks so well in the AWARE AGMs.
I enjoyed her crisp, matter-of-fact storytelling. I feel like I'm sitting in her living room listening to her stories. A really warm, welcoming read.
In Where I Was, Constance Singam maps out her life and experiences through key events - starting from when her childhood in Kerala when her family moved back because of the Japanese occupation in Singapore, in Singapore as a young woman and marriage to N.T.R. Singam, her life overseas after the death of her husband at a young age, and her rich life in activism and civil society soon after leading up to the present. She weaves commentary on key historical events into the memoir as well, such as Operation Spectrum and Coldstore, how PAP came into power, the merger and separation from Malaysia, the AWARE saga.
History comes alive through firsthand accounts but I must admit I didn't truly understand how that is until I read this memoir. It's fascinating to be able to capture a slice of time through the little experiences - the commentary of cab drivers allowing a glimpse into the worries and beliefs of Singapore's working class back then, how she had to drive to the library during lunchtime to get a handwritten letter typed by the librarian, how Singaporeans live in real fear of the police if you dared to support the opposition party. I know AWARE's history pretty well but I really felt like I was there with her. She talked about how fearful some of the members were after one member was detained by the ISA, how friends advised her to stop her work. She talked about how the first panel AWARE held at the library garnered only 5 interested participants, but eventually grew to massive movements. She talked about her nervousness speaking in public, which is surprising because she speaks so well in the AWARE AGMs.
I enjoyed her crisp, matter-of-fact storytelling. I feel like I'm sitting in her living room listening to her stories. A really warm, welcoming read.
February 2, 2026
a friend introduced me to singam's work and what strikes me most is how the memoir captures the internal contradictions of advocacy work. i.e even within AWARE's leadership, feminism meant different things to different people while also uncovering a reality of coalition-building.
there's this observation about the "package deal" problem: if you identify as feminist, do you also need positions on lesbian rights, homosexuality, sex work? where do the boundaries lie, and who decides which struggles are legitimately connected?
mostly, the memoir reveals how advocacy work in singapore involves constant navigation - of structural barriers, strategic compromises, the negotiation between what's possible and what's necessary. the questions it raises feel more valuable than any definitive answers it might offer.
there's this observation about the "package deal" problem: if you identify as feminist, do you also need positions on lesbian rights, homosexuality, sex work? where do the boundaries lie, and who decides which struggles are legitimately connected?
mostly, the memoir reveals how advocacy work in singapore involves constant navigation - of structural barriers, strategic compromises, the negotiation between what's possible and what's necessary. the questions it raises feel more valuable than any definitive answers it might offer.
April 18, 2022
Where I Was is Constance Singam's memoir, where she details her beginnings in Kerala and Singapore, as well as her unique journey in becoming one of Singapore's most notable civil society members amidst life and loss.
What initially drew me to this book was my curiosity about the AWARE saga and its legacy, since I'd only been a child when it happened. And while Singam's account of it is extremely illuminating and emotional to read, her memoir brings so much more to the table.
With easygoing prose, I enjoyed seeing how Singam's multicultural childhood experiences shaped the way she perceived the world around her. Moreover, as someone who lived through the tumultuous changes that Singapore underwent in the 60s to the present, I learnt a lot more about the sentiments of the everyday Singaporean through her commentary on several historical events, ranging from Singapore's merger and separation from Malaysia to Operation Spectrum and Coldstore.
Additionally, Singam included a global context in the backdrop of such events, allowing readers (especially those of the younger generation) to better understand how international events were connected to our local context.
Throughout this recounting, she also delivers the important message that life need not follow along the path society expects us to go—she took sabbaticals from work, and went back to school much later in her life, all of which would be invaluable experiences that make her who she is today.
I highly recommend all Singaporeans to check this out!
Thank you Ethos Books for providing me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
What initially drew me to this book was my curiosity about the AWARE saga and its legacy, since I'd only been a child when it happened. And while Singam's account of it is extremely illuminating and emotional to read, her memoir brings so much more to the table.
With easygoing prose, I enjoyed seeing how Singam's multicultural childhood experiences shaped the way she perceived the world around her. Moreover, as someone who lived through the tumultuous changes that Singapore underwent in the 60s to the present, I learnt a lot more about the sentiments of the everyday Singaporean through her commentary on several historical events, ranging from Singapore's merger and separation from Malaysia to Operation Spectrum and Coldstore.
Additionally, Singam included a global context in the backdrop of such events, allowing readers (especially those of the younger generation) to better understand how international events were connected to our local context.
Throughout this recounting, she also delivers the important message that life need not follow along the path society expects us to go—she took sabbaticals from work, and went back to school much later in her life, all of which would be invaluable experiences that make her who she is today.
I highly recommend all Singaporeans to check this out!
Thank you Ethos Books for providing me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
August 12, 2023
From childhood to a reflective senior citizen, Constance Singham takes you on a walk through the decades of her life, checking in with the significant events of the times. In Singapore, that means the gradual and reluctant transition to a more open society, and the many challenges to the status quo which AWARE led.
It does build up to her significant time with AWARE, as she could have been a dutiful homemaker not for sudden changes. She provides her account of the AWARE Saga when civil society experienced an upheaval from an unlikely source, which resonates until today.
It’s well paced and an excellent book for younger Singaporeans to get a glimpse of the events which shape the present day, especially for anyone involved with civil
society, even marginally.
I wanted to read this as soon as I saw the review in local newspapers. I lived through many of the events she describes (she got started later in her life) and her actions helped shaped the society I lived in as they were pioneers. It was the backdrop against which many of us functioned in different areas of civil society.
It does build up to her significant time with AWARE, as she could have been a dutiful homemaker not for sudden changes. She provides her account of the AWARE Saga when civil society experienced an upheaval from an unlikely source, which resonates until today.
It’s well paced and an excellent book for younger Singaporeans to get a glimpse of the events which shape the present day, especially for anyone involved with civil
society, even marginally.
I wanted to read this as soon as I saw the review in local newspapers. I lived through many of the events she describes (she got started later in her life) and her actions helped shaped the society I lived in as they were pioneers. It was the backdrop against which many of us functioned in different areas of civil society.
September 21, 2023
Such a warm and pleasant read. I really enjoyed getting to know Constance through her writing, from her childhood in Kerala to her activism work in Singapore. She also provided insights into historical and political events that continue to have a ripple effect on civil society today. Now working in this space, certain things make a lot more sense. I wish she had explored her work in AWARE a bit more, but I imagine that her time there would be more than enough to fill another book.
October 21, 2023
I loved it. Such an exemplary life & personality! The book is much better, well edited and coherent and flows beautifully in her voice and conviction. Constance is an exceptional Malayalee & Singaporean. More than sharing her life, the book reflects her life’s philosophy and teaches you about a trailblazer and a person of integrity and honesty, rare traits.
December 1, 2024
I inhaled this book over a weekend. Memoirs worth reading are written by people who have led difficult and extraordinary lives. Constance Singam's love for reading and literature came through in the way she turned her painful life (in civil society of Singapore) into one of the most hopeful and exquisite books I have read this year.
July 9, 2022
3.8
A pleasant, enjoyable get-to-know-Constance. Thank you to Constance Singam and the amazing women who have help improved lives.
This was a Singapore "through the years of sorts too.
A pleasant, enjoyable get-to-know-Constance. Thank you to Constance Singam and the amazing women who have help improved lives.
This was a Singapore "through the years of sorts too.
November 7, 2023
Truly the personal is political and this memoir beautifully captures that
April 23, 2022
Where I Was is a memoir written by Constance Singam which recounts her life as a girl living in Kerala, India, to becoming a well-respected member of Singapore’s civil society at AWARE (Association of Women for Action and Research).
Through recollections of the different stages in her life, we see how events throughout her formative years moulded her to become a committed civil activist. There are, or course, periods of ups and downs, including the struggles of identity, the loss of her husband, and the whole well-reported AWARE Saga that occurred in 2009 (the most exciting bit).
As someone who is, admittedly, not very interested in politics or civil activism, this was a surprisingly eye-opening read that made me more aware of the civic responsibility we all hold as citizens and the need for independent thought.
I particularly enjoyed Singam’s narrative voice, which balances intellect, humility, and humour, to an effective degree of imparting insight and wisdom. An essential read for civil activists!
4.5/5
Through recollections of the different stages in her life, we see how events throughout her formative years moulded her to become a committed civil activist. There are, or course, periods of ups and downs, including the struggles of identity, the loss of her husband, and the whole well-reported AWARE Saga that occurred in 2009 (the most exciting bit).
As someone who is, admittedly, not very interested in politics or civil activism, this was a surprisingly eye-opening read that made me more aware of the civic responsibility we all hold as citizens and the need for independent thought.
I particularly enjoyed Singam’s narrative voice, which balances intellect, humility, and humour, to an effective degree of imparting insight and wisdom. An essential read for civil activists!
4.5/5
April 7, 2023
Picked this up cuz Singam is such an inspiring pioneer in Spore's activism landscape :') Interesting to learn about her life history - back in Kerala, then to SG, Aussie, and shuffling between these places.
She also made it a point to situate her life events within SG's political developments/and changes. Very enlightening to see how macro changes affected her daily personal life circumstances.
I did wish that she shared more about her work and the struggles of her time in AWARE as I was hoping to better understand the activism landscape , and how it had evolved overtime.
She also made it a point to situate her life events within SG's political developments/and changes. Very enlightening to see how macro changes affected her daily personal life circumstances.
I did wish that she shared more about her work and the struggles of her time in AWARE as I was hoping to better understand the activism landscape , and how it had evolved overtime.
December 30, 2025
I bought the book at its launch in 2023, and I finished reading it in two days. I do not ordinarily fancy reading local writers unless I am persuaded that they are worth my time, money, and effort. I did not read "Where I Was" for this reason; on the contrary, I read it in order to understand the writer, whom I met at the launch but who nevertheless failed to leave an impression strong enough to prevail upon me to invest my time in reading her work.
In spite of the impression her personality made upon me that night, I read "Where I Was" from the first word of “And So It Begins” to the last, which trailed off on a faint note of melancholy.
On the whole, I cannot help but acquiesce in the view that it reads rather smoothly, carrying the reader along --- especially one who is thoroughly familiar with the political, social, cultural, and historical milestones, landscape, and events that made banner headlines from the 1960s to the 1990s. I have no doubt that Singam writes well, not so much, however, in the style or manner of the writers she claims to enjoy, but rather in the manner of busy journalists who churn out reams of write-ups for the dailies. There are a number of incidents that she describes which arrested my attention almost instantly, transporting me to those moments in history.
I might be thoroughgoingly wrong, but I could not divest myself of the sneaking suspicion that the book is more a diatribe about the AWARE saga and the personas that characterise it than a memoir meant to shed light on the incidents that informed her mind. If that were indeed the intention, then my congratulations to Singam, who somehow managed to achieve that purpose without jarring an otherwise coherent narrative.
It is an unmistakable observation for any astute reader that the writer is evidently torn between Scylla and Charybdis --- between reality and her own feelings about Singapore, its leaders, and PAP policies. That is pardonable, given that the writer made no pretence of not harbouring such strong emotions.
In spite of the impression her personality made upon me that night, I read "Where I Was" from the first word of “And So It Begins” to the last, which trailed off on a faint note of melancholy.
On the whole, I cannot help but acquiesce in the view that it reads rather smoothly, carrying the reader along --- especially one who is thoroughly familiar with the political, social, cultural, and historical milestones, landscape, and events that made banner headlines from the 1960s to the 1990s. I have no doubt that Singam writes well, not so much, however, in the style or manner of the writers she claims to enjoy, but rather in the manner of busy journalists who churn out reams of write-ups for the dailies. There are a number of incidents that she describes which arrested my attention almost instantly, transporting me to those moments in history.
I might be thoroughgoingly wrong, but I could not divest myself of the sneaking suspicion that the book is more a diatribe about the AWARE saga and the personas that characterise it than a memoir meant to shed light on the incidents that informed her mind. If that were indeed the intention, then my congratulations to Singam, who somehow managed to achieve that purpose without jarring an otherwise coherent narrative.
It is an unmistakable observation for any astute reader that the writer is evidently torn between Scylla and Charybdis --- between reality and her own feelings about Singapore, its leaders, and PAP policies. That is pardonable, given that the writer made no pretence of not harbouring such strong emotions.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews