Schadenfreude - is the act of enjoying or reveling in someone else's misfortune, usually someone who on some level is a rival or opponent. Not to be confused, this is not about finding happiness in their misery, but more a one-off event that helps you feel some sort of superiority in the moment.
Example; You and a classmate are always at the top of the class for maths but this past year she seems to be breezing through and you have had your struggles. She is a friend, a good friend and you wonder if it is pure jealousy or if you are finally at the wall where you don't understand anymore. Either way, that big smile she has when her tests are returned is wearing thin. And today your mark wasn't good but the teacher tells the class about her success, just falling short of 100%.
Three days later she returns from the principal's office in tears and confides that she has been caught cheating on the previous maths test and has received an automatic fail. Your heart goes to her as a dear friend but somewhere inside you are warmed by the situation. In the end, you have outscored her and done it correctly, she has been shamed but there is a guilty pleasure to it for you - Schadenfreude!!
It is an emotion that we all, undeniably, indulge in. Some of us don't care and others feel guilty later but as humans, it is practically impossible to avoid. Does this make you a bad person? Is it ok because everyone experiences it? Don't believe you do, try these.
Ever rejoice in your team's scoring due to an opponent's error? But you celebrated the error more than the score?
That dude at work who has it made. A stunning wife, amazing house, awesome car, just got a promotion that you went for. What's that though, his wife has just filed for divorce.
The waitress you work with gets all the big tips because she is stunningly beautiful and all the rich guys fawn all over her. But all that money is being pumped into her gambling addiction.
That politician you cannot stand but he just keeps getting re-elected. What a waste of oxygen, people just don't see it, and there you go, another landslide election win. But what is the front page story the following month? His political party is embroiled in a scandal for receiving kickbacks from underworld members.
Do you rejoice, even just a little at these sorts of things? Schadenfreude!!
Tiffany Watt Smith looks into the world of Schadenfreude and to read this gives you pleasure and makes you squirm which in a sense is its own form of Schadenfreude. Are we delighting in something here, and then feeling guilty or ashamed there? The book is filled with anecdotes like those I have laid out above but there isn't a large amount of substance. A lot of going over old philosopher's notes and political speeches of yesteryear but really, once you are told the meaning of Schadenfreude where else can the book go but to point it out?
All I can say is read it and smile or cringe as you do. Each time is really just a reflection of what your circumstances are. Rich/poor, male/female, caucasian/other, north/south, employed/unemployed, athletic/not, sports team 1/sports team 2 ..... and then you decide for yourself. Is this unavoidable human trait good, bad, funny, sick, stupid, or worthy? Just be careful because at some level you will be judging yourself.