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How We Love Matters: A Call to Practice Relentless Racial Reconciliation
This powerful book reimagines discipleship by begging us to acknowledge that racism exists in the Church—and offers the hopeful message that we can disciple it out.
It is not an accident that racism is alive and well in the American church. Racism has, in fact, been taught within the church for so long most of us don’t even recognize it anymore. Pastor Albert Tate guides all of us in acknowledging the racism that keeps us from loving each other the way God intends and encourages siblings in Christ to sit together in racial discomfort, examining the role we may play in someone’s else’s struggle. How We Love Matters is a series of nine moving letters that educate, enlighten, and reimagine discipleship in a way that flips the church on its head. In these letters that include Dear Whiteness, Dear America, and Dear Church, Tate calls out racism in the world, the church, within himself and us. These letters present an anti-racist mission and vision for believers to follow that helps us to speak up at the family table and call out this evil so it will not persist in future generations. Tate believes that the only way to make change is by telling the truth about where we are—relationally, internally, and spiritually. How We Love Matters is an exposition of relevant Biblical truth, a clarion call for all believers to examine how they see and understand each other, and it is a way forward toward justice, reconciliation, and healing. Because, yes, it is important that we love each other, but it is even more important how we love each other.
It is not an accident that racism is alive and well in the American church. Racism has, in fact, been taught within the church for so long most of us don’t even recognize it anymore. Pastor Albert Tate guides all of us in acknowledging the racism that keeps us from loving each other the way God intends and encourages siblings in Christ to sit together in racial discomfort, examining the role we may play in someone’s else’s struggle. How We Love Matters is a series of nine moving letters that educate, enlighten, and reimagine discipleship in a way that flips the church on its head. In these letters that include Dear Whiteness, Dear America, and Dear Church, Tate calls out racism in the world, the church, within himself and us. These letters present an anti-racist mission and vision for believers to follow that helps us to speak up at the family table and call out this evil so it will not persist in future generations. Tate believes that the only way to make change is by telling the truth about where we are—relationally, internally, and spiritually. How We Love Matters is an exposition of relevant Biblical truth, a clarion call for all believers to examine how they see and understand each other, and it is a way forward toward justice, reconciliation, and healing. Because, yes, it is important that we love each other, but it is even more important how we love each other.
249 pages, Kindle Edition
Published March 8, 2022
32 people are currently reading
1474 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 44 reviews
March 11, 2022
This is a very personal account. Tate begins by explaining his motivation in writing the book. He was with his family at a scenic overlook in the California foothills, enjoying the view, when a police car drove in the lot and parked some distance away. The policemen were just chatting, taking a break. Soon Tate's nine year old son went to their own car and sat in the back. When questioned, the boy said he was afraid of the police. “I could die.” Tate realized there was a new generation already marked by racism. He wrote this book to have a candid discussion on the issue.
Tate combines personal experiences, stories of racial injustice, and biblical injunctions to help readers understand the reality of racism and what we can do. The book is very enlightening as to how Blacks feel in danger in so many situations that would not concern us whites. He also drew my attention to the difference between equality and equity.
Part memoir, part enlightening account of racism experienced in the past and today, this is a good book for Christians to understand the situation. It is also a challenge. Tate writes, “Our connection with God fuels our connection with one another because it is through our love of Jesus that we're able to love our neighbor...” (249/3180) That's a challenge to really evaluate our relationship with God. And the challenge that stopped me short. “You don't get to love me in whatever way is most comfortable to you.” (880/3180)
I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
Tate combines personal experiences, stories of racial injustice, and biblical injunctions to help readers understand the reality of racism and what we can do. The book is very enlightening as to how Blacks feel in danger in so many situations that would not concern us whites. He also drew my attention to the difference between equality and equity.
Part memoir, part enlightening account of racism experienced in the past and today, this is a good book for Christians to understand the situation. It is also a challenge. Tate writes, “Our connection with God fuels our connection with one another because it is through our love of Jesus that we're able to love our neighbor...” (249/3180) That's a challenge to really evaluate our relationship with God. And the challenge that stopped me short. “You don't get to love me in whatever way is most comfortable to you.” (880/3180)
I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
August 24, 2022
This is a first book coming from one of my favorite faculty pastors of Willow Creek Church. Albert Tate has a way with words, humor and style to bring his messages to diverse audiences. In the opening of this book, Albert talks about getting in shape to run a marathon, and he’s never run a day in his life. Finally a member of his church decides to train him and he comes over to start. After a period of exertion and sweating Albert asks when this torture will finally be over, to which the trainer responds that was just the warm-up. Albert explains in his book, he also will stretch us, not our bodies but our thoughts about love, race and what God has to say about racial reconciliation. This is about my tenth book dealing with race and yet still sections of the book do stretch me…words, phrases, etc. But stretching is good. Better yet, one of my book clubs is candidly discussing diversity and love. Love is loving people who don’t look like you, act like you, vote like you, etc. Love them all and care about their issues. Valued insights.
September 13, 2022
A deeply impacting read for me. Being at the table together has become such a powerful image for me from his life, perspective and writing. Albert invites us into his life and then pastors us with compassion, heartache, empathy and conviction in ways that make me want to live differently - moving towards my brothers and sisters of differing ethnicity. It is becoming a call to listen, understand, ache and hopefully walk differently together. This is a must read in our times of racial pain, heartache and despair.
January 26, 2024
I really got a lot out of this book. Tate touched on so many aspects of life and where we can work on growth in a way that was honest but not offensive. I think this book could help so many people work on reconciliation and understanding how we can love each other better.
April 22, 2022
Excellent book on biblical racial reconciliation that has practical tips on how we can all sit at the table together in love
December 15, 2023
Everyone should read this book.
March 30, 2022
Still trying to wrap my mind around the words on these pages but - this book was incredible. I have read a lot of books surrounding race reconciliation and the church and this is by far the very best. Albert Tate is incredible. His personal story woven into the mix of his heart for a multiethnic church, a church that is devoted to race reconciliation. I smiled, I cried, I took every word to heart. As someone who has been in the ministry space and ultimately hurt in that space, this book was so relatable. As Christians we have a responsibility to speak up, care and learn about the oppressed. There are no excuses to not be making race reconciliation a priority in the white evangelical church. A must read for everyone. Definitely a book I will read again in the future.
May 16, 2022
In How We Love Matters, Albert Tate has written an impactful book on the subject of racism. He wrote it as a series of nine letters and the idea is inspired by Dr. King’s letters from Birmingham. Some of the nine letters included to readers, siblings, America, Church, Jesus, whiteness, and much more. He is a pastor at a multiethnic church with the majority of the congregation is white. He begins the book by sharing how it took only 9 minutes and 29 seconds for George Floyd to be killed by suffocation from a police officer’s knee pressed down against his neck. This led to protests and a stance against police brutality. This all occurred in the year of 2020 when the world was dealing with the effects of covid-19. He also shared a personal story that happened with his nine-year-old son. They were together as a family enjoying nature when two cops parked near them. His son went back to the car to hid because he was afraid, he was going to die. He stated how this is a deep fear that many Black men face.
He explored the major topic of whiteness and how it is displayed in our culture. Some of the examples included, Band-Aid colors, iPhone face ID, and emojis. He explained how we are taught whiteness is better and this led us to facing racial oppression. He looked at how it’s in your best interest to act white in order to get upward mobility. All of this is a hidden message that we are told to follow by our culture. Even though it’s really spoken out loud. He looked at racism and how we act when a Black person is gunned down and people are trying to find the reason as to why the victim deserved what he got. He explained how satan act in all of this and how he tries to convince us that racism isn’t real. He looked at the story of Zacchaeus and how Jesus invited him to his house to sit at his table. The world wouldn’t have pick Zacchaeus. He is eventually changed and he repents and he gives back to others what he has taken.
I would recommend this life changing book to anyone is tired of racism and they are wanting to see a change. I immensely loved how Albert explored the different dynamics of where we currently are in racism. I liked how open he was in sharing personal stories and examples. I was very opened in reading his perceptive on racism and the different conflicts in our America, church, and community. This book has tons of inspiration about how we can work towards racial reconciliation and he tries to teach readers on how we can truly love one another like Jesus does.
"I received this book free from the publisher, Hachette Book Group/Faithwords for my honest review.”
He explored the major topic of whiteness and how it is displayed in our culture. Some of the examples included, Band-Aid colors, iPhone face ID, and emojis. He explained how we are taught whiteness is better and this led us to facing racial oppression. He looked at how it’s in your best interest to act white in order to get upward mobility. All of this is a hidden message that we are told to follow by our culture. Even though it’s really spoken out loud. He looked at racism and how we act when a Black person is gunned down and people are trying to find the reason as to why the victim deserved what he got. He explained how satan act in all of this and how he tries to convince us that racism isn’t real. He looked at the story of Zacchaeus and how Jesus invited him to his house to sit at his table. The world wouldn’t have pick Zacchaeus. He is eventually changed and he repents and he gives back to others what he has taken.
I would recommend this life changing book to anyone is tired of racism and they are wanting to see a change. I immensely loved how Albert explored the different dynamics of where we currently are in racism. I liked how open he was in sharing personal stories and examples. I was very opened in reading his perceptive on racism and the different conflicts in our America, church, and community. This book has tons of inspiration about how we can work towards racial reconciliation and he tries to teach readers on how we can truly love one another like Jesus does.
"I received this book free from the publisher, Hachette Book Group/Faithwords for my honest review.”
June 28, 2022
This book was okay, thus the 3 stars. I didn't disagree with his views on race and racism, but they were not particularly novel or profound. I appreciated Tate's use of memoir and frequent citation of Scripture, but there are other, better books that more fully incorporate sociology or ecclesiology--I wanted more commentary on society and on practical steps for Christians. Tate is an orthodox Christian who can speak well to the need for racial justice within evangelical Protestantism, so I would recommend this book to conservative/evangelical Christians taking early steps toward racial reconciliation and racial justice. In that sense, it reminded me of Linne's The New Reformation: Finding Hope in the Fight for Ethnic Unity, Gray's How to Heal Our Racial Divide: What the Bible Says, and the First Christians Knew, about Racial Reconciliation, Jarvis' Redemptive Kingdom Diversity: A Biblical Theology of the People of God, or Mason's Woke Church: An Urgent Call for Christians in America to Confront Racism and Injustice, all of which have their uses.
March 19, 2022
I Thought I Really Knew Love
As a follower of Albert Tate throughout the decades, the way he encapsulates the multifaceted issues of todays times is always engaging; however, after hearing this book, in his words, with his experiences, and his evolutionary viewpoint of where we need to go, I’m speechless. As an AA woman, many of his experiences were my own, but as a believer of Christ, his call to action, not just for everyone else, but for me personally, has challenged me beyond belief. His pragmatic approach intertwined with biblical truths, interlaced with practical stories has ensured that I will listen again, take more notes and exercise strategies. I’m humbled.
I’m challenged.
I’m broken, and yet, I am still His.
Wholly broken, seeking to be Wholly Healed. For my children. For my grandchildren. For my future generations.
Albert has reminded me that our broken pieces are the grandest part of His Masterpiece, and it is all For His Glory. Thank you Pastor. For your transparency. For your willingness. For your pursuit of a greater nation. Thank you for showing us how to really love!
As a follower of Albert Tate throughout the decades, the way he encapsulates the multifaceted issues of todays times is always engaging; however, after hearing this book, in his words, with his experiences, and his evolutionary viewpoint of where we need to go, I’m speechless. As an AA woman, many of his experiences were my own, but as a believer of Christ, his call to action, not just for everyone else, but for me personally, has challenged me beyond belief. His pragmatic approach intertwined with biblical truths, interlaced with practical stories has ensured that I will listen again, take more notes and exercise strategies. I’m humbled.
I’m challenged.
I’m broken, and yet, I am still His.
Wholly broken, seeking to be Wholly Healed. For my children. For my grandchildren. For my future generations.
Albert has reminded me that our broken pieces are the grandest part of His Masterpiece, and it is all For His Glory. Thank you Pastor. For your transparency. For your willingness. For your pursuit of a greater nation. Thank you for showing us how to really love!
April 24, 2023
This is one of the best books I've read about race relations. Pastor Tate's basic premise is that if we are believers, God is working in our hearts to change us. And as we are changing and growing, our views on race relations must also change and grow. A person is not better than another based on his skin color, but certainly some people have been treated more unjustly than others based on their skin color and some (white people) have enjoyed greater privilege based on skin color. It is not enough to say I love others who are different to me. How we love that person matters! He describes how to love better.
Pastor Tate writes this book as I imagine him talking (not that I've ever heard him!). He talks to us like friends, but a friend who is not afraid to tell the truth because he loves us. My only complaint about the book is his overuse of the word "just" as in "I just love how...." or "He just wants to...." or "I just think it's....". But then, if the style of the book is a conversation, I guess he would use that word a lot in conversation, so I just tried to not let it annoy me. :)
Pastor Tate writes this book as I imagine him talking (not that I've ever heard him!). He talks to us like friends, but a friend who is not afraid to tell the truth because he loves us. My only complaint about the book is his overuse of the word "just" as in "I just love how...." or "He just wants to...." or "I just think it's....". But then, if the style of the book is a conversation, I guess he would use that word a lot in conversation, so I just tried to not let it annoy me. :)
June 10, 2022
"Anything that makes you feel better about loving your neighbor less is probably godless."
I 1000% recommend the audiobook for this one. Albert Tate's voice adds so much. Here's the review I left on Audible:
Deeply Personal, Yet Widely Applicable...
Albert Tate has done it again. After following his preaching for just over a decade, I have once again felt challenged, encouraged and renewed by his words. I also felt something else: frustration... but an important, healthy frustration that leads us out of complacency and into action.
For anyone interested in diving into this exemplary piece of writing, I invite you to approach this with openness and readiness to listen and be humble. Come with your mind set on learning, not defending. Come ready to share in Albert Tate's sorrows and victories. Come ready and willing to be changed. Just come.
I 1000% recommend the audiobook for this one. Albert Tate's voice adds so much. Here's the review I left on Audible:
Deeply Personal, Yet Widely Applicable...
Albert Tate has done it again. After following his preaching for just over a decade, I have once again felt challenged, encouraged and renewed by his words. I also felt something else: frustration... but an important, healthy frustration that leads us out of complacency and into action.
For anyone interested in diving into this exemplary piece of writing, I invite you to approach this with openness and readiness to listen and be humble. Come with your mind set on learning, not defending. Come ready to share in Albert Tate's sorrows and victories. Come ready and willing to be changed. Just come.
Read
November 7, 2022The title gives the impression this book is going to be more grounded in research or how to. It is mostly a meandering memoir. The impact would be greater if the title was more clear. It was off putting that he chose to state ideas from The Body Keeps the Score without bothering to read the book.
The issues I have all feel like an error of the publisher/editor rather than any fault of the author. Ultimately, I wasn’t here for a memoir and the author and I are mostly aligned already anyway.
DNF ☹️
The issues I have all feel like an error of the publisher/editor rather than any fault of the author. Ultimately, I wasn’t here for a memoir and the author and I are mostly aligned already anyway.
DNF ☹️
August 6, 2022
So good! Tate sets up difficult conversations on the foundation of race. If we want a diverse church, we will be offended! This challenged me and broke me in all the best ways.
The big idea: being offended is a prerequisite to loving others well. The more we go through it, the stronger that muscle for love gets.
The big idea: being offended is a prerequisite to loving others well. The more we go through it, the stronger that muscle for love gets.
November 29, 2022
This is a story about race, love, Mississippi and God. It's a "get it together and stop being racist" love note to humanity. That may sound impossible, but Pastor Tate writes with compassion, directness, and his very specific sense of humor. A recipe for progress if I ever saw one. White people, especially, need to pick this thing up. Stat.
August 12, 2023
Powerful, eye opening, and honestly a must read for everyone. I love Albert -his preaching, his personality, and his love for people. There are so many things I want to remember from this read, so many things I have to look at inside myself. You won’t be sorry if you take the time to read this. Thank you Albert
March 12, 2022
Thoroughly enjoyed this material. Excellent meaningful transparent book. The subject has become something dear to my heart. It’s time to the body of Christ, the Called out one’s, to start looking like his kids. Well done Pastor Albert Tate, well done
April 6, 2022
A Very Important Message
I would recommend this book to every pastor, no matter the ethnicity. Pray over the passages that you find difficult and consider how God can use you as a sibling sitting at the family table with Jesus at the head.
I would recommend this book to every pastor, no matter the ethnicity. Pray over the passages that you find difficult and consider how God can use you as a sibling sitting at the family table with Jesus at the head.
April 12, 2022
Tate writes from an honest, broken, yet hopeful heart. He encourages the reader to do the hard work of loving people who are different than us. He provides steps people can take towards practicing relentless racial reconciliation. His story telling is second to none. I highly recommend this book
April 18, 2022
The most grace filled conversation about racial reconciliation. I was moved to tears several times. Albert Tate has an amazing gift of storytelling. If you are willing to listen and learn, this book will change your life. For the better.
April 19, 2022
I love Albert Tate. Because of his speaking and writing style, this read is enjoyable, but because of the content of this book, this read is painful in a healthy way. It forced me to constantly check and re-examine my heart and recognize how my race has impacted the way I view the world.
May 30, 2022
An excellent discussion about the problem of racism in America from a Christian lens. Tate reminds us that “Jesus didn’t flip people. He didn’t flip them off. He turned table.” We need to accept and express grace to bring about change.
October 13, 2022
This is my 5th book about understanding racial relations in America.
Yes, read up on the history of racism in America first. But then with this book, confront your own own heart and outward actions. I’ll take the challenge to love even when I still struggle to see.
Yes, read up on the history of racism in America first. But then with this book, confront your own own heart and outward actions. I’ll take the challenge to love even when I still struggle to see.
April 25, 2022
This is an excellent book. Full of biblical truth and a call to love well and love like Jesus. I will definitely be recommending this book and its one I will likely read again.
April 30, 2022
I heard Albert Tate on The Holy Post podcast. This was a very engaging book and spoke about racial reconciliation with such love for others. A very practical and necessary book.
May 11, 2022
Thank you Albert Tate
… for modeling the possible, for setting the table where there is a place for everyone. How we love does matter after all.
… for modeling the possible, for setting the table where there is a place for everyone. How we love does matter after all.
May 13, 2022
Tate knows the culture and has the experience and wisdom to win you. A great and fresh understanding of our on going pursuit of racial reconciliation.
May 18, 2022
Recommended Reading!!!
May 21, 2022
Candid, challenging encouragement to the church to truly listen to and love our spiritual siblings.
May 30, 2022
This was such a moving read. I really appreciated the letter format, and I really enjoyed the conversational style of writing. Really accessible without being youthful.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 44 reviews