No One Can Change Your Life Except For You

by Laura Whitmore

'Funny, positive and life-affirming, Laura is like a PT for your self-confidence.' SARA PASCOE

'Clear-headed advice and relatable honesty.' MATT HAIG

'My favourite kind of book - like a glass of wine with your smart, funny friend.' KATHERINE RYAN

'When I was a kid the first album I owned was by Wilson Phillips. I remember the lyric from the song Hold On, 'No one can change your life except for you'. It's how I've chosen to live my life. There is a freedom when you take back control. Stop waiting for someone to save you and do it yourself. I recognise everyone has different levels of struggle but no one just hands you a chance. We don't have to wait for Prince Charming to rescue us, or wait for the opportunity to come to us. We can be our own heroes. We can create our own dreams.'

Laura Whitmore knows lucky breaks come to those who are ready to step into their own power, even when they're feeling nervous as hell about it. In No One Can Change Your Life Except For You, she shares her experiences of overcoming heartbreak, body image worries, self-doubt and insecurity.

Laura has learned that optimism, self-belief and learning to accept yourself, will bring you more than anyone else can ever give you. And she shows how her own struggles can help you through yours.

Frank, heartfelt, inspirational and funny, this is a book to remind you that the hero you are looking for is YOU.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Audiobook, Irish Literature

272 pages, Paperback

Published January 3, 2023

Reviews

[Sophie Nixon · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars
This book is just feel-good 101. I have this weird love for reading about life from other people’s perspectives. Yes, nothing in this book is something I haven’t read from elsewhere but it’s the charm, wit and honesty that make is as fun as it is. I’d recommend picking this up if you need to just check yourself and find perspective in life, it’s a true depiction of the art of living as fully as you deserve to.

[Jade · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was looking forward to reading this book, No One Can Change Your Life Except For You, and having finished it I'm still not sure what I thought. Whilst at times I quite liked this book there were other times where I wasn't enjoying it at all.

I found this book didn't seem to know what it was trying to be and ended up as somewhere between self help, autobiography and lectures. Some of the stories in the book were interesting but they didn't always feel relevant. There were a lot of political things mentioned for a self help style book, I really don't care what someone's opinions on Trump are and some sections sounded more like a lecture than I'd like in this type of book. There were good parts about the book and it was nice to read some of the more self help pages and the affirmations at the end of each chapter are a nice addition and good to encourage more positivity.

I think this book was ok but it wasn't what I expected it to be. I think it would have been better if the book was clearly either self help or biography style. Maybe it would be more enjoyable for younger readers.

[Shannon Waters · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this, I may be biased as I really like Laura but would definitely recommend if you like books like this! ✨

[Milly · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was brilliant. Totally changed my perspective on life generally and opened up my view of Laura Whitmore. What an amazing and intelligent woman and a very talented writer. Would highly recommend.

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this across a week, reading a couple of chapters or so a day and absorbing what I read each time rather than whizzing through it like a normal book. During the UK’s third national lockdown, this has really helped me to understand my perspective of life and how I can change negative thoughts into positives. A very good read!

[Sophie]

DNF

[Lynn Butterfield · Rating 4 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
A feminist masterpiece ✨

[Emma Anderson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing book, a must read for everyone!

[Emma Hardy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was cynical that this may be another celebrity wishy washy read but its far from it. Packed with insight, and points of view but has a personal touch. Laura isn't afraid to touch on personal experiences and explore sensitive subjects. Its relatable, very engaging and focussed on empowerment.

[Chloe Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this book, it came into my life just at the right moment - I was on nights (again), I was tired, burnt out, and stressed. Along with working in the NHS, I’ve had a lot of anxiety and home stress. When I think about this book, I only wish I had read it sooner. This is the type of book that is inclusive to everyone - male/female/non-binary etc, you can still take away all the great lessons and advice given no matter what gender/identity.

A lot of the topics discussed are completely relatable as well as finding yourself able to resonate. At 25 years old, I was able to understand and relate, if I had read this at 21 I would have been able too and if I were to read this again at 30 - I’d still resonate but the lessons would mean something different.

At work, I am a wellbeing champion, I have created a wall full of positive affirmations, book recommendations, film recommendations, quotes of the week and it's full of bright colours and eye-catching. A lot of what Laura has written about in this book has been used on the wall. It is situated just outside our staff room and next to the staff toilets - the perfect stopping point when the day has got a little bit too much and you need to go into the toilet for a cry before putting on your superwoman/man face and heading back out 🦸🏼‍♀️🦸🏽‍♀️

From an NHS nurse, thank you for this book @thewhitmore We probably all have the same thoughts about certain situations and life's moments, but only you alone should have control and power over your choices and how you choose to live your life ✨

This is a book that will remain on my shelf for years to come. Let me know what your favourite positive quote or affirmation is below ⬇️

[Caroline Croezen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really like fellow Irish gal Laura but I was disappointed with this. I didn't learn anything new and she doesn't give away too much about herself. She refers to difficult work situations but doesn't name the job so there's no juicy gossip. I'm a year older than Laura so it could be more helpful to younger readers.

[Emily Dunthorne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Made me think, and made me laugh.

[Kate Henderson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Laura Whitmore you are a wonder!!!

I was lucky enough to be given an early copy of this book in exchange for an honest review, and I have also listened to the audio book too.
I think this book should be made compulsory for all young females! Whitmore does try and make this book inclusive for both male and female readers but I do strongly feel that this book would be more relatable to females. I am a 30 something female and I got a lot from this book, but I think that younger people would get a lot from it too. This book is a manual for looking at life in a more positive light and how to be a stronger person!

I definitely got a lot from this book, and I loved the mixture of 'self-help'/'self-care' writing, along with anecdotes from Laura Whitmore's own life. It was nice to get a slightly closer look into Whitmore's early life too. She is a very private person, so there isn't too much detail but it was welcomed nevertheless. Each section ends with an affirmation, and a summary - which means that the book is good for dipping in and out as well as reading in one go (like I did!)

The audiobook is narrated by Whitmore and as I always say, when an author narrates their book (especially in non-fiction) it just brings the book to life so much more.

This book has given me so much to take away, and it is definitely one that I will reread/re-listen too. I'm sure I will get something new from it every time. I recommend this to anyone - whether you're a fan of Laura Whitmore or not. It makes you take a new stance on life, and being comfortable in your own skin!!

Thank you Laura for such a great read/listen!

[🌶 peppersocks 🧦 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reflections and lessons learned:
“Change your perspective, change your world”

As a child I donned the imaginary waistcoat and denim, stood on the high hilled rocks, and struck power fist pulls into the body as I sang my heart out to Wilson Phillips - what a song, but I think that there were a lot of empowering 80s girl pop - we were being raised in a world of opportunity - ironically a crap time, but the optimism and ‘do it anyway’ attitude over-ruled worries.

I’m a bit older than Whitmore and haven’t necessarily tuned into anything as she was hosting but have the enjoyed what I’ve seen, and sought this book for the optimism. I totally agree with the use positive language and affirmations to tilt perspective. Smiling, body language, anxiety, vulnerability, picking to be surrounded by optimistic people as far as possible whilst still acknowledging that life isn’t as plain sailing for everyone, but purpose being the favourite word. Definitely borrowing the IKEA kinder egg milk and cookies mind trick!

It’s a shame as I felt that a few chapters felt crowbarred in to deliver an agenda that matched in with a few similar books recently, and didn’t feel part of the flow of the narrative. Is this publisher dictation? Perhaps that works on topics to stick out as things to pay attention to? Hmmm, I’m afraid for me the jury is out.. still a recommended read though

“It is impossible to be happy all the time... what we can achieve is control over our outlook, our perspective...”

[melodee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a fun and real self help book, it’s so far probably the best i’ve ever read under that genre and definitely changed my mindset and outlook after finally finishing it. A lot of the things she has said, although is very mainstream within self help/ self love talks, serves as important reminders. Whitmore talks a lot about taking your power back within your mind, constantly emphasising that it is you who is in control over your own life therefore no one can change your life except you because majority of our problems and worries are created within ourselves in our mind.

Some of my favourite quotes from the book:

“The face staring back at me is the one that is constant in my life. The face may get older, sprout more hairs - but it’s the one face i can rely on to be there. Instead of waiting for other faces in my life to show up, I realise the most important face to show up is my own.”

“A broken heart will never be the same afterwards. But we aren’t born to stay the same”

“The things that make you different are the things that make YOU, and the right people will love you for exactly who you are.”

“Be your authentic self and, if that means you annoy people, so be it. Annoying the hell out of them. Most of their doubts will come from their own insecurity about leaving whatever box they have trapped themselves in.”

“Sometimes the biggest obstacle you must overcome is yourself”

Obviously had sooo many more, I think I have over 25 page
markers in my book.

[Chris Nash · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’ve not read the blurb or been recommended this book you may spend the first few pages trying to work out what this book is, as the pages flit between autobiographical stories in no chronological order with little segments of advice in between.
In fact, when you get in to this book it’s an excellent read. A book full of advice and help and guidance all written in a super relatable way. Whilst being a celebrity herself you will read Laura’s stories and illustrations and instantly connect with them which makes you relate to every page. And if you let the points sync in you’ll feel empowered to make changes in your own life.
The reason for not giving it 5 stars is that the ‘jumpiness’ of the first few pages continues throughout and there are many times when you wonder how you’ve got from one point to another in the space of 2 sentences ... it really is like someone writing their thoughts as they appear!

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

No One Can Change Your Life Except For You gives insightful, empowering, and motivational advice on dealing with circumstances we can't change or that aren't always in your control. The book guides taking control and ownership of your issues and improving situations. It can be hard to control our intrusive and obsessive thoughts because the mind tells us things that are not good for us and can trick us into all sorts of feelings and thoughts. The important thing to realize is that they are YOUR THOUGHTS, and you can control them.

Chapters include:
She Is Strong: Just a Girl
She Is Happy: The Eternal Optimist and Finding Perspective
She Is Polished: Expectations
She Is Vulnerable: Open Your Heart
She Is Insecure: Stop Comparing
She Doesn't Always Know What To Do: Faking It
She Learns: We're in A Constant State of Evolution
She Is You: The Future

The book was relatable and relative. The chapters on vulnerability and insecurity really hit my heartstrings in the best way. ⚡💖

[Katie Young · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the kind of book I WISH I had read in my late teens/twenties. It's packed full of great advice on relationships, miscarriage, friendships, religion, social media and more. I love Laura's honest and open writing style and think it's wonderful that she is sharing her experiences in this book. It's also really good to hear someone in the public eye speaking up and offering good advice on how to approach social media in a healthier way. At the end of each chapter is a 'reflection' and 'affirmation' and I thought this was a lovely way to bring each chapter to a close and give some food for thought.

I enjoyed reading this book. Many thanks to Orion and NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Siobhán Lucid · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was so excited... to finish this book what a load of narcissistic bullsh*t. It wasn't a self help book or an autobiography... The going to Barcelona with a unnamed movie star and fighting off the mugger... Christ on a bike.... I didn't glean 1 piece of advice or sentiment I would reread let alone share with a friend. I'm sure she's good at presenting the shows I don't watch and maybe that's the demographic but I couldn't imagine recommending this book to young or old. And I understand the horrendous irony of me being so critical of a person who presents Love Island and I should have gone easier but honestly don't waste the evening reading this... if it wasn't for the reading challenge and the library being closed I would have dropped this book.

[Becca · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love a good self help book, I always finish them and feel like I can conquer the world! 😂 I’ve read so many you would think I could be a life coach by now but nope I’m still learning and I think I always will be.

Life’s challenging isn’t it and Laura’s book looks at self help in ways that you have the power to be your own hero. I LOVE that. In this book Laura discusses things like perspective, expectations and vulnerability. Along with beneficial advice that you can enforce yourself. We all have the power within us to save ourselves from anything. It’s a fun read with great advice.

I haven’t watched Love Island since Laura left (just keep forgetting it’s on and then can’t catch up 😂) but we love the Whitmore! 💕

[Allie Whitfield · Rating 4 out of 5]

Listened to this via Audible and it is well worth it. Part autobiography, part self help Laura has created an uplifting read/listen and I’d be amazed if anyone came away from it feeling negative. If you’ve delved into the realms of personal development books there will be little in this book you’ve never heard before, which is the only reason for me it’s not a 5 star - I’m calling this 4.5! However, the positive advice paired with Laura’s wit and charm is a great combo. A lovely insight into a strong woman who has grown up in the public eye. Well recommended.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

You Can Read This Review On My Blog!

Thank you so much to the team at Orion Spring for a free gifted copy of this book!

This is a lovely debut from Laura Whitmore, describing her life and the lessons that she has learnt throughout. Each chapter is titled with a stage of Whitmore’s life: ‘she is strong,’ ‘she is happy,’ ‘she is vulnerable,’ each section giving a poignant insight into what has led Whitmore to where she is today. It’s an incredibly easy read, but thought-provoking as well.

Whitmore’s poetry is interspersed throughout, a particular favourite of mine being ‘A Sad Poem,’ where Whitmore goes through the emotions and feelings that she experienced during one breakup. Each chapter ends with a related reflection and affirmation, ensuring that the reader is left thinking about her words.

There is advice about friendships, relationships, social media etc, and she puts a positive spin on every lesson that she’s learnt. The book is relatable and uplifting – Whitmore takes us on a positive and uplifting journey!

No One Can Change Your Life Except For You feels like a conversation with a friend – helpful, nurturing and kind, it is the perfect easy read for anyone looking to feel that they are not alone.

[Emma Dargue · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting self help style book that has some valuable things to say. I enjoyed this even those this type of self help book I don't usually like but really enjoyed this. I think one of the main reasons for liking this book is due to me really liking Laura Whitmore. There is also a lot of advice in this book that is incredibly useful at this time of my life.

[Gemma · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thinking about who we are!

This book makes you think about the way you think. Questioning yourself and the way you perceive yourself as a person. The affirmations are a great addition to the book and something to look back on to enable us to reflect. Thoroughly enjoyed and hopefully more to come from an inspirational woman.. Thank you Laura!

[Obsessed☆reads:) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I ACTUALLY FINISHED THIS. when i was gifted this i was like:NOOO i wont be able to finish this. it'll go so slow but it was actually a great read. With lots of comedy in between. It shouldve been 5 stars up until the point where her views were strongly opposed to mine. adn though those are hers. i feel like the writr shouldnt have broadcasted that piece of information

[SophieWorrall · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book.
It was so honest and real as well as full of humour.
I appreciated the reflections and affirmations through out the book. The book was very empowering and I loved that the books message through out is to love yourself!

[Charlotte · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book full of little anecdotes and short stories about being successful as a person and as a woman. How to face the challenge of being female in a patriarchal society. Offers mantras and exercises for each chapter.

[Monika · Rating 1 out of 5]

Cringe is all I can say. Most of it is just the author blabbering about her life and giving surface level self-help tips such as believe in yourself, change your vocabulary and set intentions.
Waste of time

[Laura Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great read from ‘the whitmore’ and worth picking up. Great advice, honest, relatable and I enjoyed the affirmations!

[Jessica Fear · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this book some what enjoyable, parts were great.. others not so much.
By the final few chapters I struggled to keep going