No Thanks, I'm Full: Breaking Through Dysfunction and Finding Unconditional Love Along the Way

by Debbie Payne

In “No Thanks, I’m Full,” Debbie Payne shares her life, growing up and living in Hamilton and Sarnia, Ontario, Canada. She was born into a dysfunctional family, which deeply affected her and the life choices she made. Debbie shares those experiences, the lessons she’s learned, and how becoming a mother and finding her inner strength gave her the determination to break the cycle of dysfunction and succeed. Throughout the manuscript, she celebrates those who have shown her unconditional love and support, especially her beloved dog of 15 years, Coco.

Full of rawness, humour, and compassion, “No Thanks, I’m Full” teaches us that we are all worthy, lovable human beings that deserve to live our best lives, and that being born into dysfunction does not have to dictate who you are or who you become.

144 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 9, 2022

About the author

In No Thanks, I'm Full, I share my life 's journey being born into generational trauma and how it affected some of my life's choices. How and why I broke through this cycle and lessons learned. Through determination along with the gifts of unconditional love given how I was able to find my inner strength to overcome some of my most challenging adversities. Full of rawness, humor and compassion I hope to inspire others to shed their shame and believe that they are worthy lovable human beings that deserve to live their best lives! In memory of my sister Gale who battled with her mental health most of her life I am donating part of my books proceeds to the Canadian Mental Health Association.

Reviews

[Cherylmcfarlanehotmail.Com · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a compelling memoire, written with honesty and heart.

[Taylor Lalonde · Rating 5 out of 5]

Debbie writes with such raw, truthful, vulnerable and emotionally powerful realism. Her ability to tell her life’s story is compelling and powerful. Picking up this book will have you looking at the clock and realizing you’re almost done the whole thing, I just couldn’t put it down. She truly put her heart and soul into every word in this book. In sharing these experiences with her audience she reminds us all that we really can preserver and get through anything thrown our way and that we are truly not alone in this big wide world. She also teaches that the unavoidable generational dysfunction and traumas that may have been brought upon us on children doesn’t have the power to dictate the life we choose to live for our futures. We pave our own paths. I would highly recommend this book to any reader.

[Lynn Downie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn't wait for Debbie to finish writing her book and have it published. I wasn't disappointed! Debbie's book was well written, honest, interesting and witty. It brought back so many memories for me, good and bad, as I could relate to many of her life experiences. Bravo Debbie on your first book I look forward to your next one.

[Yani Jacobs · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage"-Brené Brown
Debbie is such a courageous and resilient woman. After reading Debbie's story you are truly left
with the inspiration that no matter what...never give up! It is written with brutal honesty which
makes it both fascinating and inspirational.

[Cathy Mott · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic I could not put it down. It is very interesting yet upsetting to learn how some children are treated by their own family. A real eye opener for mental health. It takes a very strong person to share their personal story.

[Dennis Pitocco]

“Rarely do I come upon such a level of unvarnished truth and candor as Debbie has delivered here. For those traveling through the ups and downs of life wondering if they are alone in their challenges, this book is for you. Without question, a refreshing level of authentic storytelling at its very best. Pick it up and you simply won’t be able to put it down.”

Dennis J. Pitocco
Publisher & Editor-in-Chief, BizCatalyst 360°
Chief Reimaginator, 360° NATION

[Brenda]

Wow! What a wonderfully, well written book. Once I started reading it I couldn’t put it down. Can’t wait for the next one!

[Wendy L. Scott-Hawkins]

Deb’s story is a truthful account of the many obstacles she faced throughout her life but overcame with great pride. Her honesty and warm heart make the reader read on to see her though.

[Sue Eyre · Rating 5 out of 5]

I started reading Debbie's book and couldn't put it down! Her book was so interesting and raw. She tells it like it is. She put her life out there...for all of us to get to know her and understand her. I know her on a business level and I'm in awe of her honesty and her resilience. A remarkable person! Congrats on your first book. I hope there is more in the future!♡

[Robyn James · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is easy to read despite its subject matter – and as many attest, seriously hard to put down. Payne shares the type of personal story which ripples through the hearts and minds of many who were born into families of significant dysfunction, marked especially by a hellish ride through their formative years. While this book offers a deeply personal account of real tragedy born of intergenerational trauma, the author seems only to ask us to let her tell us about her life. While her first two decades are filled with a relatable onslaught of experiences many will likely see reflected in their own, the reader may feel they are left to find the depth in the emotion for themselves. I found the way this book is written cleverly invites us to reflect upon our own truth. Payne tells it disarmingly, not detailing her pain in a superficial or detached way, but as a flowing anthology of so many major and minor experiences, which almost literally seem not to take a hold of her. Told from the perspective of a mature woman who chose to face it all head on, she knows what she’s been through, and unreservedly, she never sinks into suffering. Note to self! Seriously, I laughed more than I cried.

This author is every child, every woman; a person who has survived an unrelenting backstory of family tragedy. Unexpectedly, she does not share nitty-gritty details in dramatic ways, nor claim personal reverie of rising above life by locking in metaphors of ‘defeating the darkness’, ‘climbing mountains’, or becoming ‘some kind of successful beyond measure’ after ‘turning pain into purpose’. She tells her truth. She seeks no spotlight. She delivers a balanced view, that despite any odds, one can live a steady and perhaps largely ‘normal’ life – one built choice by choice.

Payne was not spared by trauma, nor by life itself. But as sure as she felt every bit of her lived experience, we are implicitly invited to endure, by holding onto our own kind of hope. Despite all that became etched in her mind and heart, Payne demonstrated for herself an unwavering kind of perseverance that allowed her to hold a reflective awareness of her own truth, without ever letting it win. In addition to breaking the cycle of intergenerational trauma in her family of origin, she faced the usual challenges of everyday life with a courage and willingness to pick herself up after every fall, and stitch herself back together after every heartbreak. She knows herself deeply, a wise woman who’s been there and back more times than many will count. Remarkably, she has not let harshness define her, instead keeping a steady focus on giving her life the meaning she wanted it to have. She always steered herself towards what mattered most, and she is proof that love endures.

Her story now held in the pages of her book, I hope this author finds a new medium through which to continue to share her indomitable spirit and inherent wisdom for those who know that there are things no one should ever have to face, and there are paths we would prefer not to have to walk. Remember though, Payne more than suggests that we can allow ourselves to forge a path that we, most simply, want to choose.

[Annette Sykaluk · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book captured my attention from the first page. Even though I know the author, I did not know all of her life details. I felt a huge connection through having souses that support us in everything from our past to our futures.

Thankyou Debbie for showing me that there is so much hope for people who suffer from mental illness, dysfunctional lives and generally shitty backgrounds.

I couldn’t put the book down!!!!

[Mags Thomson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been reading No Thanks I'm Full these past two weekends and am swept away in the story. It's an easy read but it really pulls you into the twists and turns of Debbie's life! It just goes to show that life is all about navigating the curve balls! Well worth a read of this autobiography!

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deb writes about her life challenges without any second thought. It makes you realize everyone has things to overcome. It was a very interesting read.