Please make me pretty, I don't want to die: Poems

by Tawanda Mulalu

The debut collection of an exciting new voice in poetry



Please make me pretty, I don't want to die explores tactility, sound, sensuality, and intimacy. Set across the four seasons of a year, these fresh and original poems by Tawanda Mulalu combine an inviting confessional voice and offbeat imagery, and offer an appealing mixture of seriousness and humor.

The speaker of these poems probes romantic and interracial intimacy, the strangeness and difficulty of his experiences as a diasporic Black African in White America, his time working as a teacher's assistant in a third-grade classroom, and his ambivalent admiration for canonical poets who have influenced him, especially Sylvia Plath. Juxtaposing traditional forms such as sonnets and elegies with less orthodox interjections, such as prose-poem "prayers" and other meditations, the collection presents a poetic world both familiar and jarring--one in which history, the body, and poetry can collide in a single surprising turn of image: "The stars also suffer. Immense and dead, their gasses burn / distant like castanets of antebellum teeth. My open window / a synecdoche of country."

Genres: Poetry, Audiobook

104 pages, Paperback

First published September 13, 2022

About the author

Tawanda Mulalu was born in Gaborone, Botswana, in 1997.

His first book, Please make me pretty, I don’t want to die was selected by Susan Stewart for the Princeton Series of Contemporary Poets and is listed as a best poetry book of 2022 by The Boston Globe, The New York Times and The Washington Post.

His chapbook Nearness was chosen as the winner of The New Delta Review 2020-21 Chapbook Contest, judged by Brandon Shimoda.

Tawanda’s poems appear or are forthcoming in Brittle Paper, Lana Turner, Lolwe, The New England Review?, The Paris Review, A Public Space and elsewhere.

His writing has been supported by Brooklyn Poets, the Community of Writers, the New York State Summer Writers Institute and Tin House Books.

Tawanda has also served as a Ledecky Fellow for Harvard Magazine and as the first Diversity and Inclusion Chair of The Harvard Advocate.

He was recently awarded The Denver Quarterly’s 2022 Bin Ramke Prize for Poetry.

Reviews

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

“The poem required sound from a body. The poem required
meter heard by those trees. I gift a woman’s voice bottled
so cleanly for you. Salt it. And coo admiringly with tongue.
There were other names: Sogolon, Madhavi, ubume. Leda.
Ariel. Hierarchy in how I love? Not violets, no—implant
an ending: known for representing purity, white flowers are
a neutral tone that accents any color. Camelia. Wisteria. Lust.”

[johnny ♡ · Rating 3 out of 5]

not what i expected, but still lovely.

[Sarah Cavar · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really wanted to give this five stars, because the first two sections, “Summer” and “Fall” were incredible. Unfortunately, much of “Winter” and “Spring” felt rather over-workshopped and just didn’t work for me. Still absolutely a collection worth picking up — the first few poems in particular are absolute BANGERS that I will be returning to often.

[Summer · Rating 5 out of 5]

startling & honest & some of the most innovative images I have had the pleasure of spending time with. these poems are aching & beautiful & I will reread over + over again

[Meg · Rating 5 out of 5]

UGHHHHHHHH I LOVED THIS SO MUCH

[Irene · Rating 4 out of 5]

Vibrant, evocative and educated, might sum this work up the best. Mulalu is a good wordsmith and some of this phrases are splendid, creating little world within so few a words. There is a melancholy that shifts in his poetry, sometimes overwhelming, other times distant and more like longing. Certain ideas repeated themselves as themes, the body and music cone to mind the strongest, and give it a thread that follows it through. Very enjoyable, even though I feel like I'm not the target audience.

[Isidora · Rating 1 out of 5]

The only good one was Hamlet tries Prozac. Expected more. :(

[Truls Ljungström · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jag har en förkärlek för psykologiserande lärd lyrik. Den ställer sig, för mig, i samma tradition som Shelley eller Cavafy- formuleringarna kanske är mytiska och beskriver det som inte finns, men de talar om författaren mer än om objektet som beskrivs. Mulalu skriver lärt. fantastiskt väl. och berörande. Hans mytologiserande är kvalitativt annorlunda än de förras - hos Mulalu är det grodorna som talar till honom, mer än döda hjältar eller älvadrottningar. Är det lyrik som vänder upp och ned på min värld? Nej. Men det måste det inte heller vara. Vad Mulalu har är istället underfundiga och träffande formuleringar.

Att beskriva oro som en stjärnas födsel i min njursten är så fantastiskt välfunnet att jag nog kommer att skaffa mig fler samlingar av honom, och denna i tryck, även om det inte är världsomvälvande. Det finns för många sådana formuleringar för att avstå. Väldigt ofta blir det som hos Snoilsky - formuleringen om circusflickan som Nemesis förklädd till nymf är inte heller något som kommer att vända upp och ned på din värld, men precis som stjärnnjurstenen tror jag att det är en formulering som stannar hos dig. Det är yrkesskicklighet i det, och Mulalu synes mig yrkesskicklig.

Jag är glad över att jag läste denna - titeln var spännande nog att locka mig, och jag tycker att den levererar allt vad man kan be om.

[Cait · Rating 3 out of 5]

it's been a while since I've read poetry I wasn't immediately in love with. funny enough, a goodreads mutual whose taste I trust had almost the opposite experience, but I found that the collect got substantially better as it progressed: I much preferred 'winter' and 'spring' to the 'summer' and 'fall' sections, although even early on it's interesting in its exploration and examination of the intersection between race and gender (I mean, just look at the cover) and its reflections on the tenderness of people who are black and who are read as male; I was particularly interested in the speaker's protestation (but I'm not a boy) in the poem "symphony" about kissing a frog. see also mulalu calling out and playing with and around the casual racism of sylvia plath and others.

some highlights:

"prayer"

"good long poem"

"american elegy" (I know no music for how a country should end! whew!)

.

still, though, as strong as I found it by the end, it was unsteady enough in its initial steps on the path to getting there that I can't rate it higher than 3 stars.

[Kate]

Latest book of poetry read to answer the question of whether I like/understand contemporary poetry. I like this book best out of all the ones I’ve read (if for some reason you’re interested they’ll all be in a folder on my profile called, creatively, “poetry”). My favorite poems here are “Prayer” (“Though I fail you generously and deeply…” since there are multiple “Prayer”s), “Frenzy”, and “Clarity”. I don’t know if I have a cogent way of saying why I liked this, only that it’s sometimes very funny, has a little religiosity, contrasts Sylvia Plath poems with contemporary tragedies, and I like what seemed like themes of self-perception, identity, and history. So, more like this would be good.

If you have any recommendations for collections of poems published in, say, the last 5 years, would welcome.

[Sophie]

Quotes

I don’t go on / walks depending on the news (Film Studies)

You flew home to California. I sleep in a friend’s basement (Pokémon Blue)

Like any lover, I’m into failed experiments. (Symphony)

I am hurting myself by liking things. (Prayer)

how to sleep forever but someone notices / long enough to come and wake you into spring. (all we got was autumn all we got was winter)

Shower, scrub hard: / no American girl pressed beneath. / These kinks clog beneath. (Saturday morning my hair meets this drain)

All my life is with you even on Tuesday. (Third Sonnet)

My skin is every/thing, is everything and me, / anything but / me, is me—but / you ask. It does not belong to / you, I can’t make it belong to / you—and my girl makes films. (Film Studies III)

Please. Fail me harder fail me faster yes, / fail me. (Prayer)

Forgive then this invocation again to paint my face, / but I feel necessary when my tongue is in your cochlea (Ear)

[Catherine Hayden · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 I liked how the poems were written: without too much structure and sometimes a bit conversationally. I can’t say I was overly obsessed though, but I’m sure with a closer read I would come to appreciate it more. Many centered on Blackness in America which gave me an interesting perspective and certainly asks for more dissection from me when viewed through my white gaze

[Luke Gorham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Maybe the more clever use of language this year.

[Anatoly Molotkov · Rating 5 out of 5]

"watch from the ashes and no one rises and how men continue/ to breathe this air. almost thankful for not being consumed..." Tawanda Mulalu's collection is a wrenching, personal investigation of an individual's role in history and in today's flawed reality.

[Kathie Yang · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

poems of identity within context, allusions, imaginative language, organized well into seasons.

“Hold my ribs. There’s sky
and it continues. Despite
mind, I live. There’s sky.” (31)

insightful and honest, i liked some of the poems a lot, the elegies were okay, overall many enjoyable phrases to savor

“But he shouldn’t have paid me as a gardener…No, Henry paid my hands to hold his loneliness.” (9)

repetitive at times. gut-wrenching at times. perhaps could be rated more truthfully by someone is Black in America.

“the boy with a name with a toy gun/In the park. Their imagination kills him.” (69)

[J · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not quite a 4, but definitely not a 3 either. I didn’t love or hate this collection. There were moments when I was moved by the poems, while others… not as much. One thing that stood out throughout this collection was Mulalu’s beautiful and unique use of language. I was particularly taken to the musicality of his poems, and there were a lot of musical references as well that I enjoyed.

This collection is divided up into seasons, and the poems of each section seemed appropriate in tone and imagery. A lot of these poems focus on identity, some of which tied into the ever-present anti-Blackness found in the United States; I’ll admit this was done pretty abstractly though—

I’ll admit that I may not have been in the right headspace when I read these poems, which means I could have missed a few things here and there. I’ll have to look more into Mulalu’s works, though, because the way he uses language is stunning.

[Olivia-Savannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very mixed feeling collection to me.

On one hand - there were poems I really adored in this. With a great use of language, structure and form to buoyance the meaning and themes of the poem. And they were ones which lingered with me and had me thinking about them after reading. I wanted to dissect and analyse those poems. And I could see how they tied in to present day issues / concepts.

But then on the other hand - there were poems which really didn't do anything for me. Where I felt like the images and words together felt a bit too random and lost me a bit too much. At times I can see what the poet was aiming for, but it didn't quite hit the mark for me and fell in to me either forgetting or feeling neutral about the poem.

So it was mixed. Some great, some good, some meh.

[Ashley McMullen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Please make me pretty, I don't want to die: Poems by Tawanda Mulalu explored a lot of different topics through experimental forms as well as well-known poetry structures. However, most of the time, I had a hard time connecting with the poems and wondered if I was struggling with the content or if I just genuinely wasn't smart enough to understand it.

That being said, there are themes dealing with mixed race relationships, what it means to be a Black African in today's United States of America, and sex all intertwined with some humor and a lot of reflection. I'm sure if I sat down and discussed these poems with people who are skilled in poetry analyzation, I would be able to get more out of them. But, as it stands, this was a decent collection of poetry for me, but not one I see myself referring back to often.

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

How are people so creative and we choose to make these harmful racial power structures? Mulalu writes of this incongruous reality.

"Consider the naming of this place. Who they took it from. How we once nearly named each other here. November, I am thankful for the suffering of other nations. How we grasp at solidarity again your pale kind." (26)

Gorgeous - tenderness to the yearning of a loving touch.

"I'm a little bit vampiric. I'm into mouths. I'm into necks." (59)

Take form and make it new, like Jericho Brown. Elegies, aria, prayer, etc--

Also for fans of Natalie Eilbert, Khadijah Queen.

[Margaryta · Rating 4 out of 5]

It took me about half of the collection to realize that these poems are best read aloud with someone. There is a communal quality to them and Mulalu's words have an even heavier impact once they are released into the world. Several poems already have a strong impact even when silently, like "Pokemon Blue" and "Hamlet Tries Prozac", but the majority of them have an added layer when spoken rather than read. It is also a collection that benefits from a patient and measured read, not because the poems are "difficult" or not enjoyable, but because that felt like the only way to do Mulalu's poetic work justice. I hope people give this one a chance and really sit with it, it has so much to offer.

[Bri · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wish you could do half stars on here, I saw another review that says "not a 3 but not quite a 4 either" and I agree that it lingers somewhere in the middle of the two. I didn't always understand the poems (perhaps I'm not the right audience) but there was a very specific voice throughout and the playfulness with the language at times is really great. There's an absurdist element to them. The poems did move me regardless of whether I fully grasped the meaning or not, so I think the collection still does it's job. It just didn't fully wow me. Sometimes the repetition was a bit much when reading the poems back to back, but I think they would've been more enjoyable individually. I did see an interview Mulalu did after this collection where he talks about wanting more clarity in his work, so I believe if he continues with poetry, his future works will strengthen as he grows his craft.

[Allison · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the way this collection was organized by season, and the poems selected for each season were well-matched. Some of the imagery used was lost on me as a reader, particularly that regarding desire, whereas the musings on race and depression stuck with me. Standouts from this collection include:
Argo, My Argo
Elegy (from the Summer section)
the Film Studies series
Hamlet Tries Prozac
Renga
Prayer (from the Winter section)
Forgiveness Rock Record
Vertebrae
Clarity

[Amy]

I don’t think I’m sharp enough to appreciate these poems cuz they slipped through my fingers and I couldn’t take hold. Favorite poem was Third Sonnet—

“The statue I’m eyeing
in this country would have wanted me dead or
at the very least deeply unhappy. This is not another race poem
but often I look at us and cosplay radicalism.
Can I lie to you quickly? I have never wanted another
version of events. This is my best life. All my life
is with you even on Tuesday.”

[Maja · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Then words are sometimes water
They're the flow of sound
From each to the next, little sips then swallowing"

"Can I lie to you quickly? I have never wanted another version of events. This is my best life. All my life is with you even on Tuesday."

"I'm a little bit vampiric. I'm into mouths. I'm into necks. I'm into singing things. I'm heavy with all sorts of muddled horns. Long, hollow, cold."

[Viktoria]

Tawada Mulalu’s poems are loaded with a variety of memorable images. I didn’t always get the individual parts of the poems, but those images were well worth reading the poems for. Liked Mulalu’s strong sense of self and also being black in America.

[Kathleen · Rating 5 out of 5]

That little note he wrote me

knowing that I'm moving soon to New York
to sit at a desk to make rich people richer

and maybe siphon money away from palcces
like the Continent that I was born in and

that Mahid's parents were born in and --

(75)

[Jee Koh · Rating 3 out of 5]

An obviously gifted poet, but his youthful concerns made me feel ancient. The poems also tend to run into one another, as much of contemporary American poetry does, and so it's hard to remember any particular one.

[Chiquita Dave · Rating 2 out of 5]

"Last night, Achebe tried again and I nearly heard him."

i was excited for this one! alas a few moments of acute brilliance and postcolonial meaning-making are lost in a sludge of yuppie angst. ah well.

[silas denver melvin · Rating 4 out of 5]

think i would benefit from having a physical copy that i could annotate. some poems felt difficult in the sense that i can't put my hands on them and literally draw out connections and meanings but still very clearly masterful and worth the effort of understanding

[Jane Cleland · Rating 5 out of 5]

I get a certain feel when poems excite me, tease me, intrigue me, and Mulalu’s poems do all of that and more. I especially admire Mulalu’s ability to embrace simplicity and reach great heights, as in this line: “So, I’m part of this thing where fish learned to walk.”