Queen Menopause: Finding your majesty in the mayhem

by Alison Daddo

A friendly, frank, compassionate and comprehensive companion for any woman experiencing menopause, or anyone wondering what to expect. Every woman will eventually go through menopause - that's half the population of the planet! And yet it's something that is still not fully explored. It's held in shame for some women and ignored by others. It can be devastating to some and a call to freedom for others. After going through her own 'change', Alison Daddo wanted to explore all the feelings around menopause and especially the post menopausal years that so many women talk about as being 'the best years of their life'. Through sharing her own experience in a very real way, Alison hopes that women won't feel so alone in what can be a very lonely time. Alongside stories from some very well-known Australian women (and the men in their lives), including Georgie Parker, Anita Heiss and Rhonda Burchmore,  Queen Menopause  is the guide Ali wishes she had when she was approaching menopause - so she could be more prepared for what was coming, embrace the process and feel supported.

Genres: Nonfiction, Health, Audiobook

Audio CD

Published July 15, 2022

Reviews

[Mandy White (mandylovestoread) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Alison, thank you.

Queen Menopause was a book that I was umming and ahhing about picking up. Goodness, I am so happy I bought it. It was absolutely the book that I needed at this time in my life. Women's health and issues are still very much a taboo subject and Alison Daddo made be realise that it is ok to talk about these things. We need to talk about these things.

I was a big fan of Alison in the 80' and 90's, when she was Alison Brae and Dolly's favourite cover model. I loved hearing about her days as a model, marrying Cameron and moving to the US.

Her honesty in this book was very refreshing. She talks openly about her experience with menopause at all stages. It is a scary time in your life and her stories really helped me get my head around it more. I loved to read her stories, and the stories from the other women and men. It is a natural an normal part of life that all women will eventually have to go through.

There is so much helpful information and tips on things to try. She explains what all the different stages are and what you can try to help ease the symptoms. I learnt so much about what is to come and I am happy to now have some sort of guidance. And to know that it is not all bad news!!

A must read for all women or all ages. Men would absolutely benefit from reading this too.

[Nat K · Rating 3 out of 5]

One day you wake up and don’t recognise yourself anymore. Your body feels different. There are aches and pains that weren’t there before. You’ve put on weight despite eating well and exercising. Your crowning glory no longer is. The brain fog! And outbursts of moodiness where other people don’t recognise you. Oh the rage!

Alison Daddo was an Aussie “it” girl in the 1980s, gracing many a cover of Dolly magazine which every teen girl bought back in the day. It was a veritable teenage bible which Lisa Wilkinson used to be the Editor of. Ali then went on to marry Cameron Daddo who at the time hosted the TV show Perfect Match. So she’s definitely an Aussie sweetheart and well known here. In her book she explores all of these symptoms and more as they happened to her. Leading a busy life, she couldn’t understand why things started to feel like they were falling apart.

As Alison points out, menopause is something that half of the world’s population will go through at some point. And yet it’s still such an avoided topic. The big M.

Women are very much at the mercy of their hormones, and the period (no pun intended) of perimenopause and menopause can be a rollercoaster. With humour and openness Ali talks about her experiences, and wishes more support would be available with an event that receives such differing views on “how” to handle this time. Included here are other women’s experiences who are well known to Aussies, such as Georgie Parker, Anita Heiss, Rhonda Burchmore, Lynne McGranger and Sally Obermeder who went through an early menopause induced due to cancer therapy. Each woman's experience is different, and sharing can help others know they’re not alone and they’re not going mad.

"The real difficulty is to overcome how you think of yourself."
- Maya Angelou

The book encourages women to be kinder to themselves. To seek help - whether herbal or medical. To talk to each other and share what they’re going through. To embrace this new version of themselves and not be defined by society’s view of women of a certain age. Especially as in most of western society growing older isn't necessarily seen as a privilege with knowledge and experiences to learn from. Which can make people already going through a lot to question their worth.

”We all begin again every day; every time we wake up it’s another renewal. So goes menopause - it’s a renewal of the most significant kind. A metamorphosis involving some mighty big changes. If we didn’t experience all the changes and pains and challenges would the other side feel as sweet? So keep climbing, make sure you take your crown. You earned it. You are Queen Menopause.”

3.5 stars ✩ for the honesty. And fantabulous quotes throughout.

[Kate thebooklover]

This is just the book I needed someone to write, I lost my mum in my late twenties and a conversation about menopause was something I never thought to have and by the time I thought to have it with my grandmother her mind had already escaped her. And without any other female family members to impart their wisdom this book has really helped to fill in the gaps.

Full of information that I know I will refer back to when the time comes. The chats she had with men was insightful and helped open conversations with my husband at all the joys of being a woman 🤣

I especially loved the tips on what foods and vitamins will best help to relieve symptoms.

I highly recommend this one

[Maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of great information presented in a very personal yet professional way. I loved her relating her own experiences that sometimes mirrored my own. I listened to this one and will definitely buy a print copy to have a reference. Tons of good tips on how to get out of this funk and find yourself again.

[Amanda Hack · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a fantastic book. I idolized Alison as a teen when she was in the cover of every Dolly mag in the 80’s. It’s so comforting to know what a down to earth person she really is!
I loved the beginning when she talked about her career. And the book just kept on getting better. I have learnt so much from Alison’s book. I picked it up as a whim when I saw it at the bookshop and boy am I glad I did!
She has a natural talent for writing. A great balance of being relatable but also knowledgeable.
Packed with so much helpful info. I wish this book was given out to every woman (and their partners!!) at every pap-test/mammogram appointment by the health authorities!!
We’ll done Alison on a great book.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I want to thank Alison for writing this book.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to read the book, because I had heard her interviewed about her work with pregnant women and she came across as one of those women who talked gushingly about “womens empowerment” the “beauty of womens spirits” “the amazing bodies” and “beautiful pregnancy hormones” in the way that todays modern women do. I don’t value those kind of conversations. she came across as a bit too woke and painful for me to listen to/read. I don’t tend to give much thought the politics of being a woman, I just get on with being one,
But, here I was going through perimenopause and the book was available at my local library on audio, so I gave it a go.

The thing that most struck me about menopause is that nobody actually knows much about it and it’s frustrating to find yourself in it and realise nobody talks about it, and despite half of the population experiencing it at some point, medicine seems to have very few answers. Having sailed through hormonal things like periods and puberty previously, I wasn’t expecting this at 50. Having Alison complaining about hot flushes and feeling ugly, struggling to shift kilos that had gathered around her waist (and even looking a bit dumpy and fat in recent photos despite her previous status as Australia’s favourite Dolly Model) made me feel less alone and she had some ideas and tips, as well as some other womens experiences listed. She did go on a bit about the beauty and wonder of women but she also swore a lot, so it made up for it.

[Naomi Shippen · Rating 5 out of 5]

In Queen Menopause: Finding Your Majesty in the Mayhem, Alison Daddo gives an intimate and honest account of her journey through menopause. It was a particularly rough ride for Alison, with debilitating hot flushes, weight gain and insomnia, accompanied by feelings of despair and worthlessness.

Alison tells her story with humour and a friendly, conversational style. She recounts her life as a successful model, a wife and mother and her career in women’s healthcare, and shares entries from her personal journal. Some of the journal entries capture her lowest moments, where in a society that worships youth and physical beauty, the former cover girl suffers a crisis of self-loathing. I found myself flipping to the front cover as I read these entries, unable to reconcile the beautiful, smiling face with the negative view Alison had of herself. It was heartbreaking.

The back chapters of the book are a wonderful reference, with practical support and advice. These chapters feature personal accounts of menopause from some famous women, as well as a guide to treatments, remedies, and strategies for navigating the changes that menopause brings.

In sharing her story, Alison Daddo shines a light on this important part of a woman’s life that is often maligned and silenced. Queen Menopause is an empowering guide for coming through this transition fighting fit and fierce. In sharing our stories of menopause, we help both other women and ourselves.

Long live the Queen!

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a well written book on a subject that doesn’t get spoken enough about. Menopause is something that most women will experience in their life and for many it’s a journey that they would rather not go through. This is such an informative book with loads of tips and helpful suggestions to help get women through this tough stage of life. In fact it’s good book for men to read to help them understand what women have to go through. Highly recommended.

[Sally · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book about womens journey into and out of menopause. We need to talk more about these and many other female “stuff”. Alison wrote with beautiful poise and character straight from the heart so I felt like I was chatting with a friend. This more is both informative and reassuring so you feel less lonely. All you mid forty women this is a must read.

[Susanne Singh · Rating 5 out of 5]

I remember Ali from her Dolly days and was intrigued to read this book. I found myself nodding in agreement with so much of this book as I am similar age to author. The topic of menopause needs to be discussed more as all women will go through this. We don’t have the option to say no thanks.

[Kali Napier · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alison and Dolly mag got me through puberty, so when I saw her book on dealing with menopause I thought “how perfect”. But just as Dolly set me up with expectations of relationships that never materialised, this book was not aimed at me. It is really only for women who are partnered or expect to be partnered in their remaining third of life.
I need a guide for going through menopause single, the stuff up top matters more than that down below!!!

[Reannon Bowen]

If you want to read about someone’s experience with menopause and their life before that, this might interest you. If you’re looking for a book to help you navigate your own way through peri & beyond menopause, then this not the book for you.

[Victoria Rosario · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it, found it humorous and enjoyable to read. Funny and honest. I love the help section as something I will definitely reference as things arise.
Such an important subject that is so often ignored
Thank you Alison Daddo for sharing such a person account of your experience

[Michaela · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have been an Alison fan since the Dolly days, so found this book insightful especially as she does recount her early years. Overall a realistic view of menopause and what to expect; with lots of great ideas to get through it. I'm glad i read it.

[Flip · Rating 5 out of 5]

Spot on. Most of this book made sense to me. Made me realise I am not going mad and my body is not falling apart

[Tanya Curran · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was looking forward to reading this book. I was wanting to find out more about menopause and the book did give you that. One woman’s experience but I found the book depressing. And I seriously think her husband is a saint. I had to push myself to finish reading it which was a shame. I kept hoping it would get better. Not my favourite read.

[Antoinette · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really wish there was a book when I was going through menopause which was around 12 years ago. However, this book clarified so much for me as to what was happening to me. I am in a small percentage that symptoms don’t go away completely, and Alison Daddo has helped me understand my story and delve further into it.

[Helen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I definitely resonated with this - mostly about the lack of sleep etc
As to the care of what my partner was going through or not - did not give a damn!
This part of life is when one needs support and care and empathy and if not given by your partner than you find it in yourself!

[Maddmum M · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you for sharing your story and being so open and honest!
It is such a blessing to have women like you speak out and make menopause an everyday subject, not taboo anymore.
I know I will be doing the same in my small community.

[Hayley]

Abandoned at 25%. Unfortunately most self help books are not for me. This one fell into that category. I didn’t feel I was gaining anything from reading this and it read more like a memoir.

[Rebecca Schembri · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm so glad I found this book. It is honest without heavy medical terminology. Alison Daddo keeps it real and helps make sense of the madness menopause throws at you

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is more than just a book about menopause. It’s honest, funny, interesting and educational all at the same time. A lot of times I found myself nodding along with what I was reading and say yep that’s me. Also times I was saying, I hope that won’t be me. I loved the way partners were bought into the book, how they deal with spouses going through menopause and having absolutely no idea how to deal with it.

I told a friend (medical practitioner) that I was going to read this book. She said don’t be stupid read a book about it by a professional, educated and reputable person. They were sooooo wrong and I’m glad I didn’t listen. There is nothing more educated and reputable than a person actually going through it and speaking about all the highs and the oh sooooooo many lows not only about their experience but others as well. I feel nothing got kissed and all bases were covered.

I recommend this to everyone to read, not just the ladies but their spouses also.

As Alison says, talk about it. And now my coworkers and I know way more about each other than we ever did or thought we ever would.

Read it and tell others about it.

[Valerie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everything about this book was fabulous. I loved the honesty and authenticity. I went through menopause on the earliest side of the spectrum. I am over it now but boy, I wished I had read this book when I was going through peri-menopause and during the actual menopause. I find nobody, especially younger women, do not want to talk about it and find it embarrassing. Everything in this book helps to elevate menopause for the journey it is—a right of passage for all women. I have always loved Alison Daddo. We are similar ages and I remember buying Dolly as soon as it hit the news stands and would be so excited when she were on the cover. A huge, heartfelt thank you to Alison for her honesty and sharing her genuine life. Alison you are a kindred spirit and I admire you even more for this book, Congratulations. Beautifully written. Beautifully spoken - such calming dulcet vocal tones. My daughter who is in her early 20s, now has a gift. This book! I will guide her to it when it’s her time. God willing I will still be there, as a wise woman to be able to this. This book has given me the tools.

[Yuko · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very frank and honest account of how she herself had experienced menopause and full of sincere advice on how to best cope with the transition- both for the woman and her partner.

It is a wonder how women in public life cope with this period of our hormonal changes.

Being pregnant and going through menopause both have brain fog as a possible side effect. If men had the same issue we would have effective treatment to compensate for such unwanted effects. Is it because we are somehow managing to be still effective in our daily lives? We don’t complain enough, perhaps ?

[Lemonade · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this book and it was written in a nice easy-to-read style, like I was chatting to a friend.
I thank Alison for sharing her personal story and her tips on menopause.

The only thing I would say is that there is a very strong focus on having sex and references to having children in this book. Society needs to remember that there are many women who are single (and who don't desire or want sex at all- and are very happy!) and who don't have children (or want them - and are very happy!) and they all go through menopause too.

Women should never have sex if they don't want to!

[Sarah Morrison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank God for this book!

Beautiful and honestly written. Articulate, factual, funny and transparent. Wonderful for women going through menopause, peri menopause, pre menopause, post menopause. Beneficial for partners to read also.
Well Done Ali for opening up the door to menopause and expelling the myths, taking the shame and embarrassment away from discussing it and just allowing the discussions around it be more honest and frank.

[Alison · Rating 3 out of 5]

You can tell that I'm going through menopause with all the menopause books that I've been reading lately. This one was also good, with Alison talking about her life, how she and other women have dealt with menopausal and peri-menopausal symptoms and lots about simple health issues, treatments and life-style changes. Written in a conversational way, with a bit of a bio in regards to Daddo, and not overly preachy or technical.

[Toni Umar]

3.5. A very handy and nicely written guide to peri menopause. A part memoir by the author with much of her own experiences, lots of hints and suggestions to deal with symptoms and a final chapter sharing other women’s experiences. I waited a long time on reserve at our local library to borrow this book. I will recommend it to other women for sure.

[Meretini · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this book as a research piece for a podcast I have been asked to be a part of and couldn’t help but feel like I’m going through perimenopause as I listened. Really want to see an indigenous approach to menopause which she does talk about for a bit but this is definitely more aligned to a western idea of menopause. Was a great laugh and very well read by Allison.

[Sharon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank god for this book. As women and as Alison states over & over, we as women need to discuss this stage of our lives, as freely as we do our periods and childbirth.
I can relate to so much of what has been said in these pages and will be taking away certain parts of this book as they relate to me.
Every mature woman should read this book just for an idea of what to possibly expect.