What do you think?
Rate this book
Drop the Pink Elephant: 15 Ways to Say What You Mean...and Mean What You Say
"As GMTV anchor, I interview hundreds of people every year. However well they interview, every single person would find it easier to explain their case by following these simple principles." EAMONN HOLMES, GMTV Presenter
"[Drop the Pink Elephant]...tackle[s] every aspect of personal communication in a crisp, entertaining style." THE PLAIN ENGLISH SOCIETY
"There can be no whitewash at the White House." (Richard Nixon). These nine words turned the American nation against their President. Why? Because people hadn't linked the White House with a cover up until Nixon himself made the connection. His own denial created the story.
It is perhaps the most famous Pink Elephant in history. But what exactly is a 'Pink Elephant'? Pink Elephants are the unnecessary negatives that clutter your conversation and meaning, sending out the wrong signals to anyone you communicate with.
In Drop the Pink Elephant, Bill McFarlan reveals how to avoid the deadly trap of allowing poor communication skills to obscure your meaning and reduce your effectiveness. Drop the Pink Elephant is filled with helpful, simple and practical advice on how to make your words count for more. Put these straightforward lessons into practice and you will notice immediately how much more effectively you are able to communicate with others.
Sharpen your conversation by:
* FIRST SPOTTING, THEN DROPPING THE PINK ELEPHANT
* GETTING RID OF THE JARGON
* LEARNING TO SPEAK IN PICTURES
* RECOGNISING WHEN YOU SHOULD APOLOGISE OR THANK PEOPLE
* CAPTIVATING AN AUDIENCE
N.B. No animals were hurt in the making of this book. (Can you spot your first Pink Elephant?)
"[Drop the Pink Elephant]...tackle[s] every aspect of personal communication in a crisp, entertaining style." THE PLAIN ENGLISH SOCIETY
"There can be no whitewash at the White House." (Richard Nixon). These nine words turned the American nation against their President. Why? Because people hadn't linked the White House with a cover up until Nixon himself made the connection. His own denial created the story.
It is perhaps the most famous Pink Elephant in history. But what exactly is a 'Pink Elephant'? Pink Elephants are the unnecessary negatives that clutter your conversation and meaning, sending out the wrong signals to anyone you communicate with.
In Drop the Pink Elephant, Bill McFarlan reveals how to avoid the deadly trap of allowing poor communication skills to obscure your meaning and reduce your effectiveness. Drop the Pink Elephant is filled with helpful, simple and practical advice on how to make your words count for more. Put these straightforward lessons into practice and you will notice immediately how much more effectively you are able to communicate with others.
Sharpen your conversation by:
* FIRST SPOTTING, THEN DROPPING THE PINK ELEPHANT
* GETTING RID OF THE JARGON
* LEARNING TO SPEAK IN PICTURES
* RECOGNISING WHEN YOU SHOULD APOLOGISE OR THANK PEOPLE
* CAPTIVATING AN AUDIENCE
N.B. No animals were hurt in the making of this book. (Can you spot your first Pink Elephant?)
202 pages, Paperback
First published April 23, 2003
34 people are currently reading
363 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
August 11, 2023
Don't even know where to start.
It's a total of 5 out of five. For anyone living in contact with people during everyday life, this book can be such an inspiration. The drive for improvement has never been so close.
I was recommended this book to "correct" some of my weaknesses. Therefore, I arrived quite negative at the beginning. Having finished reading it, I can only say that it was worth it.
Regret, reason, remedy will remain with me for sure. And I start already noticing pink elephants everywhere:)
It's a total of 5 out of five. For anyone living in contact with people during everyday life, this book can be such an inspiration. The drive for improvement has never been so close.
I was recommended this book to "correct" some of my weaknesses. Therefore, I arrived quite negative at the beginning. Having finished reading it, I can only say that it was worth it.
Regret, reason, remedy will remain with me for sure. And I start already noticing pink elephants everywhere:)
August 20, 2008
Wonderful book for anyone that communicates (that would be all of us). The author is British and some of his references are a little odd for American readers, but still appropriate. I'm very impressed with this book. I initially thought it would help me at work but I think it will help me everywhere in my life. I highly recommend Pink Elephants
September 26, 2010
Highlights the 'Do's and 'Don't's of Communication. The beauty lies in the simplicity of the words, very cleverly written. A must read for all those who think that they can communicate and those who can't!
June 29, 2023
I will attempt to avoid Pink Elephants (PEs) in this review; it's harder than it looks. The only reason I can reconcile a negative review here is that people misunderstand the significance and underestimate the difficulty of learning the skills at first, yet it is so rewarding when you can express yourself well.
This is one of the best non-fiction books I have read (I am unsure if I slipped in a required Pink Elephant there). As I was learning to write better reports, this book vastly improved my ability to express myself clearly. If you have to edit, even if it takes twenty minutes to re-write one sentence, the new clarity will be astounding. It is so much more meaningful to describe what something or someone is (or does) because the absence of information is almost meaningless, and denial emphasises the negativity of the issue. Exceptions are noted. It took 40 minutes for me to write this.
I have used these skills for writing court reports, speaking apologies and for life-affirming publications. The book is educational, entertains and makes points very vividly. I will omit written fun examples as the author makes them more clearly. This book was truly one of my favourite learning tools and I highly recommend it. I bought two different editions years ago. I must read one again to see if my opinion has changed; it's a great skill to learn.
This is one of the best non-fiction books I have read (I am unsure if I slipped in a required Pink Elephant there). As I was learning to write better reports, this book vastly improved my ability to express myself clearly. If you have to edit, even if it takes twenty minutes to re-write one sentence, the new clarity will be astounding. It is so much more meaningful to describe what something or someone is (or does) because the absence of information is almost meaningless, and denial emphasises the negativity of the issue. Exceptions are noted. It took 40 minutes for me to write this.
I have used these skills for writing court reports, speaking apologies and for life-affirming publications. The book is educational, entertains and makes points very vividly. I will omit written fun examples as the author makes them more clearly. This book was truly one of my favourite learning tools and I highly recommend it. I bought two different editions years ago. I must read one again to see if my opinion has changed; it's a great skill to learn.
January 3, 2026
A good friend gave me this book - he felt it had changed his world in terms of communication effectiveness. The news-related anecdotes are increasingly out dated (published 2004) but there are some timeless messages about communicating with integrity. I found about half the fifteen chapters well worth a read for original and thought provoking content. Key takeaways for me:
- Pink elephant spotting - eg. No offence but…; I don’t want to be bitchy but…; I’m not racist. Every time you are tempted to use a sentence with a “not” or a “don’t” or any “n’t”, convert it to a positive
- When something goes wrong use RRR - regret, reason, remedy
- Beware the white lie
- Remove words that dilute the message / or are just about false modesty– quite, relatively, hopefully, fairly, reasonably
- Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know,” and follow it up with what you do know
- Think of the audience: what do I want to say? Who am I talking to? So how should I explain it?
- One of the greatest compliments anyone can pay you is to tell you that you are a great listener. Big people monopoly the listening. Small people monopoly the talking that David Schwartz.
- First think, then talk, then act. “There are some who speak one moment before they think” – Jean de la Bruyère (1645 - 1696)
- Pink elephant spotting - eg. No offence but…; I don’t want to be bitchy but…; I’m not racist. Every time you are tempted to use a sentence with a “not” or a “don’t” or any “n’t”, convert it to a positive
- When something goes wrong use RRR - regret, reason, remedy
- Beware the white lie
- Remove words that dilute the message / or are just about false modesty– quite, relatively, hopefully, fairly, reasonably
- Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know,” and follow it up with what you do know
- Think of the audience: what do I want to say? Who am I talking to? So how should I explain it?
- One of the greatest compliments anyone can pay you is to tell you that you are a great listener. Big people monopoly the listening. Small people monopoly the talking that David Schwartz.
- First think, then talk, then act. “There are some who speak one moment before they think” – Jean de la Bruyère (1645 - 1696)
February 20, 2018
Reads like a self-help book from Alan Partridge, replete with anecdotes involving d-list celebrities from the 80s and an important squash match, the result of which I will not spoil for you. Needless to say, however, that the author had the last laugh.
Foreword is, of course, by Eamonn Holmes.
Should really be one page with 7-10 bullets points on, but he's had to stretch it out to a full 170 pages to make people feel they're getting good value. Just skip to the recap at the end of each chapter.
Foreword is, of course, by Eamonn Holmes.
Should really be one page with 7-10 bullets points on, but he's had to stretch it out to a full 170 pages to make people feel they're getting good value. Just skip to the recap at the end of each chapter.
November 26, 2017
Interesting and good thing to read.
January 31, 2018
The book is an easy read and though i thought there would be thought provoking visuals inside, there weren't. Also, few rules stated are based on ordinary common sense but profound nevertheless.
January 2, 2019
Recommended read
Very thought provoking but common sense book. I am already putting this advice into practice on a daily basis ... and with good effect.
Very thought provoking but common sense book. I am already putting this advice into practice on a daily basis ... and with good effect.
February 14, 2013
The author of the book of the same title, Bill McFarlan, is a journalist, broadcaster and Managing Director of a Britain’s media consultancy firm. The book reveals how to avoid the deadly trap of allowing poor communication skills to obscure your meaning and reduce your effectiveness. “Pink Elephants” are the unnecessary negatives that clutter your conversation and meaning, sending out the wrong signals to anyone you communicate with.
Some examples and phrases of Pink Elephants:
“Telling my story was never about money.”
– Paul Burrell, former butler to Princess Diana who sold his story to the Daily Mirror.
“I don’t want to gossip but …”
“No offence but …”
“But I don’t think it’s … been done with malicious intent.”
Pink Elephants only draw attention to the very thing you want to avoid.
Be positive in your writing or conversation. Drop the Pink Elephants. There is no need to use negative words. If you have nothing to hide, words used will be honest. The bottom line: be truthful and be aware of Pink Elephants in your conversations.
The book covers suggestions to sharpen your conversation by:
• first spotting, then dropping the Pink Elephant
• getting rid of the jargon
• learning to speak in pictures
• recognising when you should apologise or thank people
• captivating an audience
Some examples and phrases of Pink Elephants:
“Telling my story was never about money.”
– Paul Burrell, former butler to Princess Diana who sold his story to the Daily Mirror.
“I don’t want to gossip but …”
“No offence but …”
“But I don’t think it’s … been done with malicious intent.”
Pink Elephants only draw attention to the very thing you want to avoid.
Be positive in your writing or conversation. Drop the Pink Elephants. There is no need to use negative words. If you have nothing to hide, words used will be honest. The bottom line: be truthful and be aware of Pink Elephants in your conversations.
The book covers suggestions to sharpen your conversation by:
• first spotting, then dropping the Pink Elephant
• getting rid of the jargon
• learning to speak in pictures
• recognising when you should apologise or thank people
• captivating an audience
February 27, 2013
I first read this book several years ago and it bears re-reading. Communication is not an exact science and anything we can do to make our communications easy to understand the more likely we are to get our message over to the people who need to hear it. Apart from the quirky title and the pink elephant cartoons and footprints throughout this book it does have some serious messages for everyone not just in the workplace.
How often do you say something and mean the opposite? How often have people interpreted what you’ve said in completely the wrong way? This book will show you how you can say things so that people will get the message that you want them to receive. It will also tell you how not to bore your listeners to tears by telling them at length about things in which they can have no possible interest.
The book is about listening as well as talking and about all forms of communication not just speech. Any form of instant communication can lead you into all sorts of problems if you don’t think about what you’ve written before you press the send button. Read this book and think twice or three times before you send your tactless communications into cyberspace and alienate the people you’re supposed to be getting o your side.
How often do you say something and mean the opposite? How often have people interpreted what you’ve said in completely the wrong way? This book will show you how you can say things so that people will get the message that you want them to receive. It will also tell you how not to bore your listeners to tears by telling them at length about things in which they can have no possible interest.
The book is about listening as well as talking and about all forms of communication not just speech. Any form of instant communication can lead you into all sorts of problems if you don’t think about what you’ve written before you press the send button. Read this book and think twice or three times before you send your tactless communications into cyberspace and alienate the people you’re supposed to be getting o your side.
August 5, 2014
This is a great little book on how to communicate more clearly and effectively. The "pink elephant" is a word or phrase that waters down your message (e.g. "hopefully", "I'll try", or "I'll do my best"; or a "not" which in fact gives the audience the exact opposite message to the one you want to get across (cf Bill Clinton's infamous "I did NOT have sexual relations with that woman"). The author comes across as being credible, also offering up his own embarrassing mistakes to show that no one is perfect and we can always improve. I think we have to constantly remind ourselves of these little "rules", and it'll definitely be worth re-reading this book further down the line.
July 31, 2009
كتاب مترابط كل جزء متصل بالآخر
وبالفعل أصبحت ألتقط الفيل الزهري في حوارات الآخرين وكان هذا الجزء ممتع
والجزء المتعب حين كنت أبحث عن بدائل لجمل الفيل الزهري
أشعرني بأن المفردات لدي قليلة
وأعجبني أسلوب الاعتذار فعلا رآئع ومؤثر رغم بساطته
ولاحظت أن صفحة 155 تلخص الكتاب بشكل نقطي
والآن سأذهب لأتدرب على استبعاد الفيل الزهري *_^
وبالفعل أصبحت ألتقط الفيل الزهري في حوارات الآخرين وكان هذا الجزء ممتع
والجزء المتعب حين كنت أبحث عن بدائل لجمل الفيل الزهري
أشعرني بأن المفردات لدي قليلة
وأعجبني أسلوب الاعتذار فعلا رآئع ومؤثر رغم بساطته
ولاحظت أن صفحة 155 تلخص الكتاب بشكل نقطي
والآن سأذهب لأتدرب على استبعاد الفيل الزهري *_^
April 7, 2013
This book is good at helping you spot phrases that pepper your dialogue and helps you to weed them out to your benefit.
If you can get your hands on a copy either second hand or by loan, I'd recommend doing so.
If you can get your hands on a copy either second hand or by loan, I'd recommend doing so.
December 22, 2014
I read this book as part of a personal development book club in work. it was easy to read and male complete sense. I pick up on poor communication and pink elephants regularly now. helped my awareness
November 13, 2008
كتاب لتطوير مهارات التحدث و التخاطب
نصائح فعلاً مفيدة و قصص ممتعه
كتاب قراءه خفيفة قرأت معظمه في السيارة من وإلى العمل
نصائح فعلاً مفيدة و قصص ممتعه
كتاب قراءه خفيفة قرأت معظمه في السيارة من وإلى العمل
February 21, 2009
Very helpful if you have difficult co-workers or you have to meet clients.
August 16, 2013
كتاب ممتاز .. لم أنتهي منه
بطيييييئه
:(
بطيييييئه
:(
Currently reading
January 14, 2010this is an ongoing read for me, everytime i can't get my foot outta my mouth, i pick this book up :)
July 4, 2010
Very insightful read
December 9, 2012
Language is really facsinating!
March 4, 2013
An excellent, easy to read guide that'll help the novice, and remind the experienced, how to communicate effectively.
May 23, 2013
Fantastic book on communication!!
June 18, 2013
I loved this book....learnt lots about communication. Would definitely recommend to all from public speakers to house wives!
Read
November 6, 2013ok
October 16, 2014
A few useful tips but mostly stating the obvious and too many examples/name dropping. Found it a bit rambling at times too. Good job it was short and didn't take too much time to finish.
June 6, 2015
A really easy to read but very useful book on effective communication. I really enjoyed it
May 31, 2016
I had a good learning from this book. We normally don't watch the true meaning of our (or other's) talk ! this book makes our understanding different and in the right direction.
April 12, 2011
Very good and found it to be very practical, with a good amount of real world examples
June 13, 2011
كتاب سلس ومفيد يساعدك في تطوير مهاراتك في التواصل بوضوح وإيجابية
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews