So objectively, let’s clear a few things up before we actually talk about this:
1. This is the first fanfiction I’ve read since high school when I was deep in the throws of my One Direction Infection - so choosing the most popular (and incredibly lengthy) Hannigram fanfic on ao3 at around 2,000 pages seemed like a pretty natural progression.
2. As Donna Tart (The Secret History) once beautifully wrote, “I am nothing in my soul if not obsessive,” and it was probably one of the first times I saw myself described so fully in just one sentence. Everything I’ve ever loved, if you took it away from me, you’d see the imprints of my nails trying to mark it as my own in the same way that which holds my love has become a part of me within my psyche. Can I dare to tack on the sentiment “This has always been my design”? Could I propose that I’ve been designed to obsessively consume?
3. I am a sucker (absolute and complete sucker) for cannibalism as a metaphor for all-consuming and devouring (pun intended) love. Naturally, the NBC TV series Hannibal was going to become something that sunk its teeth deep into my heart. (Despite my opinion that while cannibalism in the show does not represent consuming love, the act of cannibalism together in Hannigram does) (And despite the fact that I truly was not expecting myself to become so completely obsessed with this show).
4. I LOVE Hannigram. I’ll say it loud and proud. I am a huge Will Graham and Hannibal Lecter shipper. It’s obvious as much when the actors themselves and the rest of the cast feel as much the same. It’s obvious in the way the two men yearn for each other. It’s clear in every scene and both men’s actions.
5. I read this for about an hour before bed every night since I finished the show and needed something to hold me over before the actual books became available at my library. I’m also learning that the show and books are different. Probably the only reason I chose to read this was because it’s literally the most popular. That said, if you’re planning on reading this ever, just note that this is the freakiest most insane fanfic I’ve ever read. Good Lord.
Okay, so now that I’ve prefaced the actual review, I will start by saying I am at a loss for what I would rate this mammoth of a book. One because it was so well written, but two because it was so out of character from the actual TV characters. If I removed who each character was from the way I knew them to be, this book was pretty fun despite all the odd shit. BUT it’s so hard to separate them. After a certain point, it’s like the author just turned Will into a girl/dog. Will Graham is a sassy but MASCULINE and THICK MAN! But that’s not how he was presented in this fic. Okay, fine, it’s somewhat an alternate universe given Will and Hannibal meet under different circumstances - but even Hannibal is so different. Alana, Jack, Beverly - everyone - so different. And it’s almost cringey after a certain point. I did see on reddit that this fic was actually the author’s attempt to practice writing bdsm/kinks which I totally understand because what other safer space can you practice your writing, but it’s almost like - ok who are these people and why am I reading something so personal? But then there are some scenes that are so well written and felt so true to the characters where you’re thinking - wow wait this could’ve totally happened in the show.
So realistically, it’s hard to rate fanfiction when you’re such an avid real book (-in a non offensive way- maybe the right word is published?) reader because you can take both the characters and the writing into account as a complete work living within just those pages, rather than with fanfiction where you’ll still be comparing it to the original source material.
Ultimately, my rambles have to stop somewhere and I’ll choose to end by explicitly saying I find myself quite into Will Graham the TV character. Honestly just perfect character design. Perfect glasses, curly brown hair, canonically a runner, mentally messed up, sassy, gruff… I’ll consider reading more fanfic on the side while I slowly nurse myself out into the peripherals of this fandom and carry on with my life…