The Girl I Used To Be

by Debbie Howells

Marie Kondo for the soul.

Anna and Will have been passing in and out of each other’s lives since they were just kids.

Now 20 years later, Anna is married - she has a lovely house, a step daughter in university and a husband with a good job.

What she doesn’t have is joy. When she runs into Will it sparks something in her, a longing for the Anna she used to be.

Together they embark on a journey to find what brings them joy, to discard what doesn’t and to become the people they always wanted to be.

But in finding themselves, can they also find each other?

Genres: Romance

362 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 19, 2022

About the author

Debbie self-published three women's fiction novels before writing The Bones of You, her first psychological thriller. It was a Sunday Times bestseller and selected for the Richard and Judy book club.
Since, she was written The Beauty of the End, The Death of Her, Her Sister's Lie, the e-book bestseller The Vow, and her latest, The Secret.
Her women's fiction novel, The Life You Left Behind will be published on 23rd February.

Follow her on Facebook at Debbie Howells writer and on Instagram @_debbiehowells.

Reviews

[Shelley's Book Nook · Rating 2 out of 5]

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I have a job that’s meaningless, a marriage that grows ever more distant, while meeting Will again has reminded me of the girl I used to be.

I read and loved The Life You Left Behind by Debbie Howells and was really excited to get this one from NetGalley. Unfortunately, I was left feeling very disappointed and I found it hard to get into this book, it was very slow going. I do enjoy the find your teen/first love trope and I appreciated the format of the book. This one is told past/present via flashbacks (note to publisher I did not like the italic chapters) and I was pleased getting to know Anna and Will's romantic backstory.

I didn't like that Anna was still married while she pursued Will. I know her husband, James is an arse and he deserved to be left but do the leaving first, before you start something new, or even better be on your own first and get your head together. The same can be said for Will. If I were Anna I would never have gone back to Will in the first place, he too is an arse as he kept leaving her hanging over and over again...“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” I found both Will and Anna to be whiners and complaining all the time instead of doing something about it.

I did like the fact that we get both Will's and Anna's perspectives, there was a lot of internal dialogue from both of them and I felt that I got to know them well, they were normal, real human beings, flaws and all. It also helped me try to understand their dilemmas and their thought process for what they were doing. Watching Anna and Will grow into the people they really want to be was a joy to read and I really liked that both of them put their daughters front and center, that is a very redeeming quality. Will's ex, Darcey was a piece of work though, as she used her daughter to get back at Will and that's a low blow and shameful.

I think I had so many thoughts and feelings about this one because I divorced when my kids were small and would never do some of the things these two did. I liked the author's other book so much though that I'd be willing to give her another chance and look forward to what she comes up with next.

Many thanks to NetGalley, Debbie Howells, and Boldwood Books for the giving of the ARC.

#TheGirlIUsedToBe #NetGalley

[Emily Christopher · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Girl I Used to Be
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Genre: Fiction
Format: Kindle eBook
Date Published: 10/19/22
Author: Debbie Howells
Publisher: Boldwood Books
GR: 3.60

I requested a digital advanced readers copy from NetGalley and Boldwood Books and providing my opinion voluntarily and unbiased.

Synopsis: Anna and Will have been passing in and out of each other’s lives since they were just kids. Now 20 years later, Anna is married - she has a lovely house, a step daughter in university and a husband with a good job. What she doesn’t have is joy. When she runs into Will it sparks something in her, a longing for the Anna she used to be. Together they embark on a journey to find what brings them joy, to discard what doesn’t and to become the people they always wanted to be. But in finding themselves, can they also find each other?

My Thoughts: This book was a bit slower for me. Her first book, The Life You Left Behind, was amazing, so I was excited to get this one. The story was narrated in a present and past flashback POV by both Anna and Will, I do love the dual POV as you get a sense of both sides. It gave you a glimpse into their romantic backstory. Anna was married when she reunited with Will, which I did not care for. However, the back stories gives you an understanding of why. The characters were fleshed out, had depth, had flaws, and were creatively explored. The author’s writing style is complex, intriguing, even if I did not agree with some of the paths. I struggled staying and keeping in tuned with this book. Since Howells’ first book, I will definitely be on the lookout for her next book.

[Melanie’s reads · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars



The ever elusive joy that seems to be missing once people reach a certain age is becoming quite a trope. Stale marriage? Taken for granted? Treated like a doormat? What you need is joy!

I love a good ‘will they won’t they’ and I did like the MC’s Anna and Will. Old loves reunited is also close to my heart but I didn’t like the way they went about things. Sneaking, lying, and don’t even get me started on staying in unhappy marriages for children. It never works and just makes everyone unhappy.

Told via dual POV I liked seeing both sides of their lives, the paths they have taken and the reasons behind their choices. While most I did not agree with I could still understand.

For me the strongest characters were actually best friend Luce and Anna’s awful husband James. I felt that they at least had the guts to be who they were even if with James that was not a good thing.

The saccharine ideals was my main struggle with this book and the repetitive messages from the universe. Maybe I’m just an old cynic/non believer in all that sort of nonsense but to me if you’re unhappy do something about it without excusing or reasoning from some other worldly existence.

[Zara Harper · Rating 2 out of 5]

This felt like the longest fortune cookie nonsense ever, full of signs from the universe and flowery romantic notions! Will they/won’t they forever in the most ridiculous ways and reasons! I enjoyed the beginning, loved the duel povs and timelines and suddenly it went sideways for me! The first hit was when Anna starts a fling with Will even though she’s married…that’s a nope from me instantly. Then it gets worse and more silly when Will gets back together with his ex, who he can’t stand, just because their brat runs away! Not to mention the wonderful lifestyle of not having to work, having friends who happen to have spare villas lying around and every fridge has a bottle of champagne in it! This started off so well but plummeted beyond repair sadly!

[Susan Peterson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an endearing book about fate, about second chances, about living the life you’re meant to live. Anna and Will have been connected since teenagers, but although fate keeps bringing them together, circumstances always seem to get in their way. There are many ups and downs in this story, a winding tell that kept me wishing and hoping that everything would turn out the way it was supposed to.

[C · Rating 3 out of 5]

The story of Will and Anna was very intriguing at the beginning to entice you to know more. However, after a little while it lost its momentum for me personally.

It was a very slow burn type of romance, rollercoaster emotions going back and forth. Just when you expect them to get together, something else gets in their way.

At times this novel felt like you are having a chat with an old friend. To reminisce over being younger again.

Some quotes I really enjoyed:
“We take on all these limitations, mostly dictated by other people. They hold us back. Get in the way of our dreams.”

“That’s why there are so many unhappy relationships ships. Safety and familiarity are not easy things to give up”

SO True! The amount of people I know is pathetic that do this. Staying together for the sake of the kids etc. if you want a kid go have one, don’t stay with someone because of them. Anyone can produce a baby. But to have your child around potential harmful people as you don’t know them is a major no for me at least. Thank goodness the main character didn’t have children, although she basically raised her stepdaughter. But she was living in a bubble, quite literally as she was having the same days on repeat and actually Losing Herself piece by piece until she finally met someone from her past that reminded her, she has choices and the way she is currently she is not herself! She has become a complete bore that follows her dull husbands' orders. Thank goodness people in the novel eventually seen what they were doing wasn’t right for them. You put yourself first. Self-care and all that.

It was great to get views from both of them across random timelines you were not expecting. The characters are very well developed with their stories. I did wonder at times how did Anna stick with her husband with the way he was treating her.

Overall, it was a cute love story based on fate and chance.

Review: https://clife.blog/2022/10/14/book-re...

[Sunny · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the POV changing constantly as it made me feel like I’m watching a movie. But I’m not so sure about this main plot, and I just couldn’t grow love for any of the main characters.

We always wonder about the choices we didn’t take in the past, but this story made me feel rather uncomfortable, watching the two main characters lie, sneak out, and emotionally cheat. Not to mention I often wanted to scream at one of them for being so stupid for how they were acting towards each other. It was an okay book for me.

[Patty · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a beautiful book!

Tissue warning, you'll need some.

I found it a bit slow to start, but once the story got rolling, it kept my attention and captured all my emotions. Anna and Will's story is one of missed opportunities, many second chances, love, friendship, families and hope. Their timing was off for many years, after a breakup as young adults up to very recently when his daughter was in crisis. I found myself rooting for them, the next time they'll meet, what will happen, etc., really invested in their story.

I won't go into detail to avoid spoilers, but I highly recommend this book.

Thanks to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review this book, but my opinions are my own.

[Angie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars

This novel tells the story of Anna and Will as they each look back, separately and together, upon their younger years and consider what led them to their lives today. Told through alternating POV and going back and forth between the present and about 20 years prior, the story slowly reveals several elements of their lives and how they got to where they are today. The characters are very well developed, as are their backstories and the plot. Even though it alternates perspectives and time periods, it is not difficult to follow and the author gives adequate information so that you know what is going on when. That being said, I did find that it was quite slow moving and there was not a lot of real action taking place. While the past is not as prominent, since it is only featured in flashbacks and generally in shorter, italicized sections, the actual meat of the story often is told in those sections. As would be expected by almost any person reflecting back on their younger years; the past is often where we learned, grew, made mistakes and had a lot of fun, all before the responsibilities and challenges of adulthood really take over, so it makes sense that those sections have more interesting content, but it made it hard for me to really enjoy the story as a whole because of this contrast. I think that I also expected the reflection to be about Anna's life from childhood (maybe the cover and the term "girl" swayed me) when it was really more about her late teens/early twenties. As a result, it was also not quite what I was expecting. Overall it was a good book, just not as engaging as I would have liked.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher, Boldwood Books for giving me the chance to read and review this book and to Rachel from Rachel's Random Resources for her help organizing the blog tour.

#blogtour

[Anne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Something I really liked about this book was the authenticity of Anna’s experience – there aren’t always explosions and pyrotechnics as a relationship dies, sometimes it just withers and dies through an absence of care. I found it difficult to forgive her husband for his failures – and I totally identified with Anna as she asserted her right to live her own life and find her own path to happiness.

And then there was the romance, the lovely Will, there in the background for much of her life – the catalyst for her taking some action to do something about the joylessness of her life, it had a particular emotional intensity and I found myself entirely invested in its many twists and turns, hoping that they’d both find lives that brought them happiness. Their personal baggage – the families, the obligations and commitments – repeatedly keep them apart, and there were times when this book really broke my heart.

I really must commend the writing – it moves between the viewpoints of Anna and Will, into their innermost thoughts and under their skins, capturing the complexity of their emotions and the depth of their attraction to each other. And if that all sounds rather heavy, it really isn’t – there are plenty of moments of sheer joy before the barriers rise, touches of lightness and humour that make your heart sing. I liked the way the timeline was handled too – dipping into the past, their long history, all those opportunities that didn’t quite come to fruition.

The supporting cast is excellent – much of the book’s message is about people being there when you most need them, and Anna’s friendship network is particularly strong and well drawn. And then there are life’s surprises – the clouds that often eclipse the sunshine, the darkness you don’t see approaching, so sensitively handled – there’s heartbreak between this book’s pages, but it did leave me uplifted by its messages and with a smile on my face.

The author’s first book for Boldwood was a particular emotional rollercoaster – so is this one, but I thoroughly enjoyed the ride. Quite a read, and one I very much enjoyed – very highly recommended.

[Emma book blogger Fitzgerald · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars just wow. Near the end of the girl i used to be kept me on the edge of my sit . I was emotinal rollcoster i felt like i was on and i reread the end because i read it wrong do glad i reread and that happened. This is lovely story which is told two narratives Anna and Will . It goes to there past when tbey are teenages and to the future about there different lives and meeting up. I really glad that Anna did want she wanted to do and go travelling. It was lovely to see Anna character develop through the book. This story left me heartbroken but hapoy at the end. 5 stars wull defiantly read more of Debbie Howells books in tbe future . Thank you @rararesources and @DebbieHowells for being part of this tour and reviewing this book.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been a fan of Debbie's work for a while now. I have read and thoroughly enjoyed each of her books. I read the synopsis of 'The Girl I Used To Be' and it certainly sounded like the sort to book I have come to expect from Debbie- a thought provoking and an emotional read. Well it was certainly all that and so much more. I thoroughly enjoyed reading 'The Girl I Used To Be' but more about that in a bit.

I was drawn into this book from the very start. The book seemed to develop a hold over me and it was a hold that I wasn't willing to break. I found that I just couldn't put my Kindle down for any length of time. My Kindle wasn't exactly glued to my hand but it might as well have been because it travelled everywhere with me. I couldn't bear to miss a single second of the story. Part of the appeal of this story has to do with the characters of Anna and Will, who I absolutely loved. They used to be in a relationship as kids but it broke up and both went in the opposite directions. Both characters have been left mentally and emotionally scarred by what has happened in their respective lives since they last saw each other. I had to keep reading to see if both got the 'happy ever after' ending that both so deserved. The more of the book that I read, the more I wanted to read and the quicker the pages seemed to turn. All too quickly I reached the end of 'The Girl I Used To Be' and I had to say goodbye to Anna and Will. I found 'The Girl I Used To Be' to be a gripping and an emotional read that really did tug on my heart strings.

'The Girl I Used To Be' is superbly written but then I have come to expect nothing less from Debbie Howells. Debbie has one of those easy going writing styles that is easy to get used to and easy to get along with. In fact reading one of Debbie's books felt more like a chat between friends rather than reading a book. I hope that makes sense. For me, the story hit the ground running and maintained a steady pace throughout. The story mainly takes place in the present day with occasional flashback chapters describing things as they happened back in the day and events that led to where Will and Anna are now. Each chapter is written from the point of view of Anna or from Will. The chapters interlink well and the story flows seamlessly as a result. Reading this book certainly felt like a bit of an emotional rollercoaster ride with all the ups and downs, twists and turns. I felt myself going through every emotion that the characters went through.

In short, I thoroughly enjoyed reading 'The Girl I Used To Be' and I would definitely recommend this book to other readers. I will certainly be reading more of Debbie's work in the future. The score on the Ginger Book Geek board can only be 5* out of 5*.

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Originally reviewed for Chick Lit Central (www.chicklitcentral.com)

I really enjoyed The Girl I Used To Be–a big reason in large part due to my own life and how I’m a firm believer in things happening when they’re meant to, having had that kind of experience with my husband. We’ve known each other for over two decades, yet we didn’t get married until years after we met. The same sort of premise applies with Anna and Will.

Anna and Will have known each other for a very long time, and have always had a special connection, yet there have always been obligations and commitments that keep them apart. When they do run into one another, it’s usually after some life-altering event has occurred, yet they never share that information. Sometimes that lends into serious miscommunication, like the time Will’s brother was in a serious car accident, but he’d made plans to meet up with Anna and had no way to contact her to let her know the situation. From Anna’s point of view, he never showed up and wasn’t interested. And then years will go by where both characters think the worst, only lending into more division.

It’s hard not to relate with Anna and what she’s feeling. There were so many goals and dreams she’d had in her younger years; dreams she’d never pursued. In her older years, she has become complacent and accepts the state of her marriage because she’s fearful of what it might mean if she doesn’t. But she doesn’t feel like she fits in her own skin anymore. Like she’s growing beyond her current self, ready for a change. I appreciated how Will was the catalyst for that, yet ultimately, Anna wants something different because she wants to live her life to the fullest–on her own terms.

But much like the real world, both characters have lives and responsibilities. It’s not easy for Will to drop everything, again proving that they continue to walk on different paths that rarely line up together. Can Anna do what she’s dreamed of? Can Will? And what will that mean for those they hold dear? I loved the honesty of that–a strong five-star experience!

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

One phrase that describes this book is ‘A total joy to read’.

When I started reading, I found the story to be easy, enjoyable and uncomplicated. I wondered where the plot could go. Don’t be fooled, how wrong was I? Here they were, the cleverly interwoven threads that bind the characters and plot delicately together. Realistic and likeable characters facing ‘normal’ or relatable life experiences, make it easy for the reader to be swept along.

The story gathers pace, with unexpected turns as the characters face increasingly challenging situations. How Debbie Howells creates such clear images of the settings is beyond me, but I was there, in Bath, Glasgow and Ibiza, seeing the views they saw, hearing the cicadas and feeling the warmth of the sun, living the story with Ella and Will, caring very much about their relationship and developments. Having them alternate as narrators gives a well-rounded view, Lucy, a long-standing friend, gets a chapter later on in the plot too. Add to that flashbacks, which fill in back-stories and developments and you have a great read.

The author sensitively covers many difficult topics in this book: divorce, grief and loss, friendship and the importance of a life lived positively. Either the research was fabulous or the author speaks from experience.

Throughout the plot, we travel with the characters on a journey of reflection and self growth. The reader experiences bravery and overcoming adversity. The power of dreams, friendship and ‘family’ in its many forms is clearly portrayed.

There are so many reflection points in this book that pulled me up short and made me stop and think! I have bookmarked several pages to revisit. Ones that stay with me are: it is never too late; happiness comes from inside; we are not defined by the past, in fact we are prepared by the past. There was even an emotional gasp moment which I had to stifle, as I was reading late into the night. Another great read from Debbie Howells.

[Julie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Uplifting, warm-hearted and inspirational, Debbie Howells’ The Girl I Used to Be is a terrific book many readers are sure to relate to.

Anna and Will have been a part of each other’s lives ever since they were teenagers, but a lot has changed in the last twenty years. Anna is no longer a teenager, but a wife and mother with a lovely home and a thriving career. On paper, Anna seems to have it all – so why can’t she shake off this feeling that there is something missing in her life? Anna has lost the ability to feel joy and her life – although seemingly perfect – seems to be completely and utterly lacking. Might a chance meeting with Will remind her of the person she used to be before she got bogged down with duties and responsibilities?

As Will and Anna embark on a journey of fulfillment and discovery together, will they find the strength and courage to fight for what they want, make some difficult decisions about what is hampering their path to happiness and rediscover everything that had been missing in their lives? Will they make the most out of this second chance at happiness? Or will this exercise end up yielding just heartache and disappointment?

Debbie Howells’ The Girl I Used to Be is a brilliantly written, emotional and enjoyable read that should be required reading for women everywhere. A fantastic read about self-discovery, navigating one’s path to happiness and finding the strength to fight for your heart’s desire, The Girl I Used to Be is an insightful, compassionately told and entertaining page-turner I absolutely loved – highly recommended!

I voluntarily read and reviewed an Advanced Reader Copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[Esther Peacock · Rating 4 out of 5]

the girl I used to be by Debbie Howells
Anna and Will have passed in and out of each other's lives since they were teenagers.
Now 20 years later, Anna is married - she has a lovely house and a grown-up stepdaughter.
What she doesn't have is joy. So when she runs into Will, it ignites something in her, a longing for the Anna she used to be.
Together they embark on a journey to find what brings them joy, to discard what doesn't and become the people they always wanted to be.
But in finding themselves, can they also see each other?
Debbie has a distinctive expressive writing style. Whether it is a twisting thriller or, in this case, an uplifting romantic story, she always manages to incorporate many topics whilst telling the story.
The Girl I Used To Be is no different; it is a thought-provoking, reflective, emotional read.
The chapters mainly alternate between the viewpoints of Anna and Will; we learn of the kind of relationship they shared through their teenage years through periodic flashback scenes and how it evolves in the present day.
We also capture a divorce's complexity and heartbreak and its ripple effect on other loved ones, friends and acquaintances. This is just one instance where the supporting characters hold their own; they are true to life, expressive and appealing.
Ending on a happier note, we see what emerges through the dark times to the moments of sheer joy and happiness that life can bring.
I want to thank publishers Boldwood Books, author Debbie Howells and Rachels Random Resources for a place on tour and for a copy to read and review.

[Grass monster · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Blurb :
Anna and Will have been passing in and out of each other’s lives since they were just teenagers.
Now 20 years later, Anna is married - she has a lovely house, a grown-up stepdaughter and a husband with a good job.
What she doesn’t have is joy. When she runs into Will it sparks something in her, a longing for the Anna she used to be.
Together they embark on a journey to find what brings them joy, to discard what doesn’t and to become the people they always wanted to be.
But in finding themselves, can they also find each other?


My Thoughts :
Having enjoyed Debbie Howells books before, I was looking forward to reading her latest offering. The Blurb was intriguing and I wanted to jump straight in.
We meet Anna, married to James and no longer happy in her marriage or job. She feels something is missing. When Anna crosses pathes with Will, her childhood love there is always a missed opportunity but everytime he makes her feel alive again and the sparks fly. But its never meant to be.
When Will and Anna meet again more recently they embark on a journey on self discovery and this time see if things can be different and weather it is finally their time to shine.
Both dealing with unhappy lives, loss and tragedy, can they finally be there for each other and make each other happy.
Debbie Howells has a way with words that tells the story, it makes the reader feel they are in the thick of all the action.
Told from both points of view and alternating between past and present day with lots of twists and turns, beautiful places visited and great supporting characters, this is one story that I think will stay with the reader a long time.
Looking forward to the next read from this Author.

[Julia · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Girl I Used To Be by Debbie Howells is the most beautiful contemporary book that will fill your heart with love.
The book is a celebration of love. Love comes in many forms. True love requires self-sacrifice. True love sometimes means letting go. True love is what will always remain.
We witness parental sacrificial love. This requires us to put our children’s well-being and happiness above our own. Love goes the extra mile for those we love.
Within the book there are two marriages in trouble and a long-lasting one that has stood the test of life.
The action is set over twenty years, alternating between present day and times in the past, moving forwards to collide with present day. We see the action from alternating points of view.
All the characters are well drawn, likable and realistic. Even the dog springs to life under the masterful pen of Debbie Howells.
Two characters meet but keep missing their opportunity. Life keeps getting in the way of true love. Their love transcends space and time. It is a love that will never die. This is a bittersweet love. We keep willing them on.
The Girl I Used To Be is breathtakingly beautiful. It sank into my heart and soul as the love radiated from the pages. I adored it. I am missing my new found friends.
I received a free copy from Rachel’s Random Resources for a blog tour. A favourable review was not required. All opinions are my own.

[Corinne Rodrigues · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book description drew me in because I love second-chance romances. However, I wasn’t quite prepared for how the book panned out.

A very true to life story that could happen to any of us. Anna and Will are young sweethearts, separated because Will wasn’t able to cope with a devastating loss that Anna knew nothing of. They keep bumping in to each other, but it’s never quite the right time for their love to turn into a comitted relationship.

This time around Anna is contemplating leaving her husband and he’s not the man she thought he was. Will is in the process of getting a divorce too. So they seem ready to take their relationship forward, until Will’s family needs him. While mourning the loss of what might have been, her meeting with Will, gives Anna the impetus to get a divorce from James and truly follow her heart.

This beautifully told story moves between different timelines, locations and points of view. Anna and Will are lovely people, whose only fault might be that they are not confident enough about themselves. When the strength of their characters and love is severely tested, one wonders if they will ever be able to get together finally.

Great supporting characters, who in Anna’s case, are there for her at every turn, show how friends can be family when family isn’t.

I thoroughly enjoyed this engrossing read.

[Elaine - Splashes Into Books · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a second chance will they/won't they romance
Where fate keeps intervening to give them another chance.
They met as teens and fell in love back then
But then were torn apart again.

The story is told from both points of view
With flashback filling the past events in, too.
But both are married to other people at the start
And seem reluctant from their spouse to finally part.

Neither have managed to follow their teenage dreams
Both are unhappy with how their life now seems.
Can they take a chance on each other once more
Or will fate have them showing them the door?

A moving story dealing with issues galore
With children, partners, grief, cancer and more.
A story of daring to step away and part
In order to help you make a fresh start.

I'm never comfortable with adultery as a key
But this is so much more as readers will soon see.
There are plenty of problems as they set off to discover
That love brings happiness to one another.

You're never certain how things will work out in the end
But I really liked the support given by Anna's friend.
That ending had me feeling oh so sad
But overall it is positive and for that I'm glad.

For my complementary copy of this book I say thank you.
I very different read and this is my honest review.

[Pam Robertson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an emotional read in many ways which takes you along and makes you feel as though you really know the central character. You meet Anna at different times in her life and gradually become acquainted with her and the choices she makes. You also realise that Will is a thoroughly likeable character but that so often in their lives, the timing is not right for them and other things get in the way. The love he has for his daughter and the responsibility he feels for her causes him to put his own desires second.

Anna’s husband is one of those people who frustrates you with his self centred attitudes and lack of empathy. However he proves to have a redeeming side. I loved Anna’s relationship with her stepdaughter. Friendship is also important in giving people the space to take a risk. Anna faces some challenges but takes confidence from the people she knows. There are so many times that Anna and Will seem to miss their opportunity to be together but you always feel that their stories are linked. This is one of those books which lures you in and I was totally invested in their story. It would make a great film! 

In short: emotional but inspiring 
Thanks to the publisher for a copy of the book

[Valerie Brown · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC of this book. I have chosen to write this honest review voluntarily and it reflects my personal opinion.
I've read a few books by this author, she writes about human emotions very well. I thought this book was a slow meander through the relationship between Will and Anna as they meet at intervals over a period of several years after their early period in love as teenagers. I thought Anna's obsession with internet messages giving her insight at any particular time was a little weird, similar to someone believing a newspaper / magazine horoscope was just for them. I disliked Lucy's inappropriate language, this could have been omitted without losing anything from the story. That said I thought some of the characters' thoughts were illuminating, e.g. people who have cheated on their partners seem to think that owning up and promising it won't happen again without even apologising is sufficient to move forward from, and the inevitable 'staying together for the sake of the children' which invariably makes life worse, not better. Never quite certain how things were going to work out, I found this book clever and enjoyable, although the 'will they / won't they' question does make it a slow burner.

[Timepassreads · Rating 3 out of 5]

Anna lives with a husband she lost emotional connection with; a job that doesn't make her happy; and a life that is not what she dreamed of. 'The Girl I Used To Be' is the story of Anna who is on an adventure to discover the things that make her happy and alive.

One of the things that make her feel alive is Will. Anna and Will are teenage lovers who gets distanced due to various circumstances. But, over the years they crossed paths a few times. But this time it's different. Or is it?

I loved the plot overall. liked the first half of the story and it felt in-line with the story line. But, second half is very clumsy and confusing. The initial story is slow, and the events in second half went fast and scenes felt cut-off. I am not sure about writing - if I liked it or not. Sure, I liked a few lines and paragraphs. But, I believe there are some grammatical errors too.

One thing I did not get is that why is Anna's POV is in first person and Will's POV is in third person. I wonder if it is solely because it has to be Anna's story.

Also I thought she is dead and became sad. Later I am confused😶 I re-read the chapter to clarify it.

[Joy Corkery · Rating 3 out of 5]

Originally published here: https://joyfulantidotes.com/2022/10/2...

The Girl I Used To Be totally gave me One Day vibes so, if you liked that, this will be a hit for you. It does follow the well-used “will they won’t they” plot line but somehow the author hasn’t made it feel weary. I think it’s because both Will and Anna are very likeable and the obstacles thrown in their way aren’t the same as similar stories.

It also made a difference that we get both perspectives throughout the book. It meant getting to know Will and Anna a bit better and being able to see them as human, flaws and all. This aspect certainly helps you root for the characters a lot more.

I will say that The Girl I Used To Be is a slow burner. Certainly some chapters could have been removed and, at times, I wonder was their any need for so much back story for their relationship. I felt that some of the instances where it wasn’t the right time yet again felt too forced and unrealistic. What I will say was that the ending was emotional and down to the last chapter, I was still unsure how things would turn out. It wrapped up the book nicely for me.

[Sally Cowling · Rating 3 out of 5]

Anna and Will met as teenagers and instantly fell for each other. However when Will's mum passes away he realises he isnt in the right place for a relationship and the blossoming romance is put on hold.

Life happens: another family death for Will and serious illness for Anna means that, despite keeping in touch, their relationship doesn't develop. Eventually, they both find themselves in unhappy marriages with unsuitable partners, always wondering what could have been if life had dealt them diifferent cards....

With their marriages both on the rocks they bump  into ech other again. Is this finally their time?

I enjoyed this book but the characters were a bit frustrating at times!  Will was in love with Anna but ran away everytime he had a problem, so she was always second place to everyone else. He would then then expect her to just take him back at a later date (and she would without question! This is a turbulent story about the ups and downs of a relationship and how it is impacted by family, illness and tragic events.

[Janalyn, the blind reviewer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ana met Will as a teenager he was in a band and her best friend Lucy drug her to the show. They had an intense connection but later on drifted apart. When he comes back to sort out his deceased dad‘s home he keeps running into her Ana is married to James and has a nice home and loves her stepdaughter but after she sees Will again it seems James is snoring couldn’t be louder when they run into each other again they form a a tentative friendship, at least at first. There’s a reason why we don’t forget our first love and sometimes it’s because it was the real thing. I loved this book and at first I felt bad for James but after you hear the whole story you’re really root for their friendship to be so much more. I loved this book and have with many other books for this author. When I see Deborah howell’s name on the book you know it’s going to be good and this one did not disappoint. I received this book from NetGalley and the publisher but I am leaving this review voluntarily please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review.

[Colin Bell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anna and Will dated when they were younger, but split up. Many years later they bump into each other whilst at the same time their marriages are struggling. Could their romance be restarted? To be honest this is not really my type of book, it covers two failing marriages which from personal experience I know how painful that can be. On the more positive side it balances this with how enduring love can be and how unimportant possessions really are. The switch between first person for Anna and third for Will was initially confusing, but quickly I didn't notice this any more. I certainly felt for both Anna and Will stuck in a seemingly impossible position and had admiration for her ability to strike out on her own, something I'd never have the courage to do. In summary this is a book that l kept dipping in and out of, but had to read to its conclusion and hence isn't a light read, but certainly worthwhile for those who enjoy slightly "heavier" reads. I received an advance copy of this book from the publisher through Netgalley, however this did not influence my review of the book.

[Henriette · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars

Anna & Will... an epic love story or a story of missed chances and what could have been?

This story is told from dual point of view, by Anna in first person and about Will in third person. It is told both in present times and going back to when Anna and Will first met more than 20 years ago. The characters developed and became three dimensional, flaws and all. We hear about their ups and downs and their various encounters over the years and join them on their self discovery journeys. There were some very touching and heart-warming moments, but also some heartbreaking times. Anna and Will's connection so strong, even if the timing was often wrong. I loved Anna's best friend Lucy with her never ending support and Anna's bond with Millie was also really special. There was more sadness than I had expected. The story moved a bit too slow for my liking but the last 20% I was really living and feeling the story and not just reading it.

[Cassondra Perea · Rating 4 out of 5]

What an emotional rollercoaster!

The Girl I Used To Be by Debbie Howells perfectly articulates the idea that timing is everything when it comes to relationships. Sadly, two people who love each other deeply and are perfect for one another, are forced to deny their hearts out of brokenness, obligation, or protection.

I appreciated that Howells had Anna go off to Ibiza and find true happiness on her own. She cultivated a life there that was filled with friendship, purpose, and fulfillment. Too often authors reinforce the narrative that it is only with a man a woman can find her happily ever after.

Hot take- I wish the book would have ended differently! I am sure the majority of readers were happy with the ending. I just felt that this book was one of the most authentic takes on love. Changing the ending would have felt more realistic.

Special thanks to NetGalley.com and Boldwood Books for allowing me to read this book in exchange for my feedback.

[Katherine Hayward Pérez · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I was invited to the blog tour for The Girl I Used to Be, I found the synopsis really enticing and couldn't wait to get into this book. The plot is just as enticing as the synopsis and the pace is good, but then it tails off to be more "slow burn".

The novel is true-to-life which is what I really hoped it would be and I enjoyed the character development.

I like nevels with storylines such as this where the characters are in love, go about their lives and then meet again. I admit I was anxious to see when, where and how they would meet again and what would happen to them in the meantime.
This novel has it all. Love, real life, tragedy and everything in between.

Thanks to Debbie Howells, Boldwood Books and Rachel's Random Resources for my eARC in exchange for an honest and voluntary review.

4.5 stars.