Spoilers ahead and trigger warning (discussion of sex crime/victim blaming).
TL;DR:
To sum up, this book is missing a consistent conflict to let the story flow naturally and instead jumps from one random event to the next, the main characters are unlikable and it is difficult to connect with the journey. There is some problematic slut-shaming content in this book. If you consider yourself a feminist, I don’t think this book is for you.
Despite these shortcomings, the sex scenes were well done and the author may have a promising future in erotica. If you are interested in reverse harem smut, you may enjoy this book. Full review below:
Storyline critiques:
This book is missing a sense of long lasting conflict. I think it would be more engaging if the main characters had some overall arching goal that they were aiming towards throughout the book. As I was reading I found myself wondering “when will I be introduced to the major point of the story?”. We get a few teasers that perhaps a motorcycle gang will supply some much needed conflict, but this never seems to go anywhere. We do get some exciting minor conflicts, but, said conflicts are resolved within a chapter or two, and often in an unrealistic and hard to believe way (ex: committing two murders but deciding to send the ambulance to the house near by so there is time to dispose of the bodies and clean). In a context with a bunch of troubled teens having a 5 way relationship and ties to a motorcycle gang, there is PLENTY of opportunity for lasting conflict throughout the book. For example, perhaps one of the members of the relationship consistently doubts the ability of Emmy to share herself among 4 people. Perhaps one of the teachers finds out about their 5 way relationship and consistently tries to sabotage them. Perhaps the main characters need to find a way to expose and take down the morally corrupt teachers so that they can thrive in their relationship. We just need some goal in this book that takes the characters along a journey. Without any goal or stakes, the plot is driven by seemingly random high school happenings (e.g. lets go to the mall.. lets go camping.. talent show…Shakespeare in English class…). It is hard to become invested in the main character’s journey.
With that being said, the book is not boring. I commend the author for maintaining a sense of excitement throughout. Further, the sex scenes are decent and LGBTQ+ inclusive. This author clearly has potential to write erotica. Further, this book is well written in terms of readability ESPECIALLY for an author’s first ever book. The author was also clearly careful to look out for typos.
There is a substantial amount of cursing in this book. Cursing can really enhance a point in a book and portray intense emotion, but when the entire book is f this and f that, cursing comes off as an awkward attempt to connect with teen characters. Similarly, it is often difficult to believe some of the dialogue is coming from 18 year olds. The book also somehow dates itself, despite being written in 2020, with the use of songs being played that were popular in the early/late 2000s. I found myself often saying “18 year olds don’t talk or behave like this these days..”. I would say the book seems a little out of touch with modern day teens.
The main characters seem to be inconsistent in their feelings and dialogue (e.g. Oliver saying repeatedly that Emmy is “his”, acting super territorial, but then he quickly complies with his closest friends dating her while he dates her). The characters all blend together as they all seem to have the same “everything is fine and we love each other, we are so good at communicating and Emmy is our world” attitudes and dialogue. Charlie may be one of the only characters who seems to have a consistent separate personality.
Problematic content:
My major issue with this book is how unintentionally offensive it is (given today’s political climate), and how unfortunately unlikeable all the main characters are. For some reason, 4 separate characters are hopelessly in love with Emmy, and the reader is given little reason to understand why. What the reader sees is an extremely judgmental person. Here is why:
Emmy is quick to judge others and call others mean names (both explicitly and in internal monologue). Emmy talks down about other women for seemingly no reason. For example, referring to other nameless characters as “skanks” for being near one of her lovers, or having sex with strangers freely. Or, saying “women in Canada wear almost nothing even though its cold here. I’m not like that. (Paraphrasing)”. For a book that seems to be attempting to be sexually liberating, it is at times the furthest thing from. Women are shamed in this book for being sexual (another example: shaming Britney for what she wears in gym class. Whether Britney is or isn’t a bad character, what she wears in gym class does not make her any less deserving of respect, nor does it mean Britney has “no respect for herself”). Another example, one of the male characters states the reason he loves Emmy so much is because she didn’t how herself at him, like other girls do. The “I’m-not-like-other-girls” narrative is not endearing, it is mean. Whats so bad about the majority of “other girls”? this book seems to paint the narrative that women are less deserving of respect if they express their sexuality and sexual wants freely. There is almost no judgement on the men in this book who express their sexuality freely.
Finally, the main characters in this book commit a completely disgusting and tasteless crime against antagonist Britney. A video leaks of Britney having sex with the school counsellor and gym teacher during a counselling session. The main characters take it upon themselves to play the video in front of the entire school at a talent show in an attempt to “ruin” Britney. The scene is described in graphic detail and even the main character Emmy admits that the way the two men treat Britney is disrespectful. Britney is a victim of a crime here, and what the main characters did is downright disgusting. Firstly, as a student, a guidance counsellor having sex with her during a counselling session is a legally nonconsensual situation. The teachers are at fault here, NOT Britney. Next, playing this video in front of others without Britney’s consent is a serious crime. The response to this scene by the other characters is horrifying. Britney’s father calls her a family disgrace, and Britney gets expelled from the school. The main character refers to this as “karma”. Somehow Britney is punished but no punishment is given to the characters who played this video in front of the entire school. Although Britney has done horrible things to the main characters, two wrongs do not make a right. After reading this, I completely turned on the main characters. If this was the author's intention, it was done remarkably well. But, unfortunately, I don’t think it was the authors intention.