So, here we are, a few days after actually finishing the book and Fifty and Otto are still taking up a lot of space in my head. Often that spot is reserved for tragic anti heroes, the ones who have been dealt the worst cards in the universe and who have been punched by life itself a time too many.
But none of that happened to Fifty nor Otto. Yes, they both had their struggles and the roads they navigated weren’t always paved with roses and sunshine - it hadn’t always been smooth sailing, but they were never the tragic characters that often stay with me the longest. And yet, here we are and I can’t stop thinking about them, about how much I loved them both, separately as well as together. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Fearne Hill is a genius. The way she, so seemingly effortlessly, writes this story, weaves it into something beautiful and unforgettable without creating unnecessary drama but something fun and clever and witty instead, is totally extraordinary. I’m a fan of her writing from the first time I read one of her books and I will read everything she writes in the future because she’s such a unique, extremely talented author. She creates characters that are real - insecure but confident too, funny and quirky, facing real life problems and dealing with them. She manages to make me laugh and cry, to warm me inside and make me swoon, pulling me in from that very first page, smiling like a fool from the very beginning and highlighting like crazy throughout the book. Not many authors manage to do that like the way she does.
So on to Fifty’s (which has got to be the very best nickname ever!) and Otto’s story. We met Fifty in the first book as Eggy’s best friend, secretly head over heels in love with him, though he’d hidden those feelings extra carefully after a disastrous attempt to kiss Eggy. He’s a sweet cinnamon roll, a surfer dude almost turning thirty, and longing for a special someone in his life, specially since Eggy found Clem. In contrast to Eggy’s active sex life before settling down with Clem, Fifty has never really fooled around that much, wasting years waiting for Eggy to love him back, something that wasn’t going to happen.
And even though that alone could have turned him into a bitter, unlovable figure, he happened to accept things went differently and he even loved Clem as his best friends boyfriend. But something is missing in his life, and that something might be someone like Otto, Eggy’s younger, 19-years old brother.
Otto suffers from epilepsy and due to his fragile health, all his Eggebraaten brothers have been overly protective and he’s kind of tired of it. He doesn’t want his epilepsy to define him and determine the rest of his life.
I loved how Fifty, without realising at first, opened up to Otto so easily. I loved how he even didn’t keep himself from being vulnerable in front of Otto and how Otto took charge of Fifty’s embarrassing secret in a way only innocently confident youth can do. I loved how Otto sometimes seemed the worldly, wiser man despite his age and overprotective upbringing. They bonded over FIFA and Otto’s need to escape from Eggy’s and Clem’s overactive sexdrive and the banter and dialogues between them was just absolute perfection.
Their friendship turns into something more, but it’s a slow burn and their first kiss is so all Otto, and everything that comes after that is so sweet and swoon worthy without it being too fluffy and overly sugary.
Eggy and Clem are a great part of this story as well, specially since Eggy is still the over protective older brother, driving Otto insane. And when he finds out that Otto and his best friend Fifty have been up to something more than being two friends who like to play FIFA, well, let’s say he doesn’t take it too well.
Writing this review, I notice how hard it is to really explain how much I loved this book and why. It was such a joyful experience, and maybe that’s because all I really need from a book is to touch my heart, whether it’s with an angsty story and a hard fought for happy ever after, or with a sweet and beautiful one that makes me smile all the way. Where the extraordinary writing is a huge part of that experience, because it’s the words that eventually find their way to my heart. This story is told from Fifty’s pov only, but I loved being inside his head and Otto is such a transparant, present guy that you don’t miss his pov.
I can hardly wait to see what Fearne comes up with next. I have come to the conclusion that I need story’s like the ones she writes on a regular basis. The humour is real, and so are the characters, and those are part of the reasons she manages to capture my heart time and time again. Despite the fact she’s fairly new to writing mm romance, she has fully deserved a spot on top of the list with this genres best authors. I can only hope there will be a lot more story’s she wants to share because I will always look forward to them.
I was kindly given an ARC from the author and this is my voluntary, honest review