From Feeling Unwanted to Wanting to Feel. Trapped by the burden to be perfect

by Jeanette Raymond

Plagued by bouts of constipation, rectal bleeding and sinus infections, Ian feels doomed to a life of misery. Angry, fearful and sleep-deprived, he's tortured by a desperate need to be wanted and loved. As a child, Ian believed that if he pleased his loved ones, they would want to take care of him, but marriage has shattered that illusion. His wife chooses her parents and cat over him, and the fear that his children will steal what love remains has led to erectile dysfunction. Envy of his children destabilizes a rocky marriage and escalates Ian's stress and anxiety to the point where he can barely function. Terrified that he may lose his wife to his kids and his kids to his wife, Ian must find a way to accept himself before he can accept love from others.
Dr. Jeanette Raymond holds nothing back as she takes readers along for the tumultuous ride that is Ian's therapy, sharing the trust and emotional intimacy between them and offering a rare glimpse into the visceral experience of the therapeutic relationship. Ian's twelve-year journey to be the dad he never had, let go of perfectionism, overcome hopelessness, and learn to trust love will inspire anyone seeking the courage to turn their life around.

292 pages, Paperback

Published February 1, 2022

About the author

Dr. Jeanette Raymond is a psychologist and psychotherapist with a private practice in Los Angeles California. Born in Calcutta, India, she was educated in Great Britain, getting her M.Ed before beginning her career as a child and educational psychologist.

After settling in America Dr. Raymond obtained her Ph.D. in clinical psychology and switched her focus to helping adults establish more secure relationships. She has a certificate in psychoanalytic psychotherapy informing her deep and transformational work with relationally traumatized people.

She contributes to training courses for psychotherapists and offers insight and relationship advice on a regular basis via her blogs and videos.