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Single Shouldn't Suck: Let Go of Finding “The One” & Love The Life in Front of You
What if searching for “the one” is getting in the way of your journey of self-discovery? What if singlehood wasn’t just a stepping stone to marriage?
As a single twenty-something in search of answers to these questions, author and entrepreneur Esther Marie leans into self-discovery and finds a life of boundless adventure. Living in the tension of uncertainty about the future, Esther chronicles eight years of her life including awkward dating stories, solo travels, deconstructed beliefs, refueled faith, a near-death encounter with a bear, and way too many camping trips. In the end, she makes peace with the mystery of unanswerable questions and finds herself in a story far bigger than she could have ever imagined.
Thought-provoking, hilarious, and relatable, Single Shouldn’t Suck offers a different perspective on singleness than your pastor who met his wife in high school. Esther invites you on a journey to liberating contentment by encouraging you to indulge in the life in front of you and let go of trying to control your story’s ending. You don’t need to wait for “the one” to start pursuing your purpose. You don’t need to waste your Friday nights feeling alone. Throw tradition to the wind, ditch the cheesy clichés, and start loving the life in front of you because being single shouldn’t suck!
“Single Shouldn’t Suck is an invitation into an adventure of bold bravery that encourages
singles to break free from the constraints of societal pressures and write your own wild and
wonderful story.” - Lisa Bevere, NYT Bestselling Author
As a single twenty-something in search of answers to these questions, author and entrepreneur Esther Marie leans into self-discovery and finds a life of boundless adventure. Living in the tension of uncertainty about the future, Esther chronicles eight years of her life including awkward dating stories, solo travels, deconstructed beliefs, refueled faith, a near-death encounter with a bear, and way too many camping trips. In the end, she makes peace with the mystery of unanswerable questions and finds herself in a story far bigger than she could have ever imagined.
Thought-provoking, hilarious, and relatable, Single Shouldn’t Suck offers a different perspective on singleness than your pastor who met his wife in high school. Esther invites you on a journey to liberating contentment by encouraging you to indulge in the life in front of you and let go of trying to control your story’s ending. You don’t need to wait for “the one” to start pursuing your purpose. You don’t need to waste your Friday nights feeling alone. Throw tradition to the wind, ditch the cheesy clichés, and start loving the life in front of you because being single shouldn’t suck!
“Single Shouldn’t Suck is an invitation into an adventure of bold bravery that encourages
singles to break free from the constraints of societal pressures and write your own wild and
wonderful story.” - Lisa Bevere, NYT Bestselling Author
- GenresNonfiction
276 pages, Kindle Edition
Published February 14, 2022
41 people are currently reading
166 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
July 29, 2022
Seeing as how this is the first review on this book, I will make sure to be as thorough as possible. <3
I pretty much had no expectations for this book. I've followed Esther for a hot minute on TikTok, and I saw that she had published this, and immediately went to purchase without another thought. Call it fate...destiny... (A horse? Little Tangled reference for you.) but something (probably the Holy Spirit cause He be like that) prompted me to buy it.
I don't regret it one bit!
It scratches that "travel memoir/ journey of discovery and a full life" kind of itch that I have had for the last few months, AND Esther unpacks many of the harmful lies and half-truths about singleness, marriage, and God's will along the way. She has a unique, fun-loving voice, and a way of writing that makes you want to be her best friend. I am sad that I don't have my own Bungalow Babes group to have adventures with!!
One of the things that stood out to me, particularly, was how accepting and even encouraging she is in allowing you to have whatever feelings you're going to have. My own experience with the tail-end of Purity Culture communicated the idea that "lust= having any sort of attracted feelings" and "guarding your heart= Never have any sort of excitement about a boy EVER because you might not marry them"... So I've had to do a LOT of hard work around being okay with flirting a little, and letting myself be excited when a guy shows interest in me. And Esther echoes this self-permission in a kind and genuine way.
Another thing I really enjoyed was being able to see her WHOLE journey, in the form of her actual diary entries over the years. It's made even sweeter by the knowledge that she IS dating a wonderful guy (gained a'la TikTok), so it makes the reader root for her even more in her ups and downs in her dating life and beyond. There were so many segments that felt like something from MY life, and seeing it through Esther's eyes gave me more perspective than I could have conjured on my own!
Overall, an easy and fun read that brings a little bit of sparkle-eyed joy and wonder to this whole singleness journey! Thank you for sharing in vulnerability and telling it like it is, Esther!
I pretty much had no expectations for this book. I've followed Esther for a hot minute on TikTok, and I saw that she had published this, and immediately went to purchase without another thought. Call it fate...destiny... (A horse? Little Tangled reference for you.) but something (probably the Holy Spirit cause He be like that) prompted me to buy it.
I don't regret it one bit!
It scratches that "travel memoir/ journey of discovery and a full life" kind of itch that I have had for the last few months, AND Esther unpacks many of the harmful lies and half-truths about singleness, marriage, and God's will along the way. She has a unique, fun-loving voice, and a way of writing that makes you want to be her best friend. I am sad that I don't have my own Bungalow Babes group to have adventures with!!
One of the things that stood out to me, particularly, was how accepting and even encouraging she is in allowing you to have whatever feelings you're going to have. My own experience with the tail-end of Purity Culture communicated the idea that "lust= having any sort of attracted feelings" and "guarding your heart= Never have any sort of excitement about a boy EVER because you might not marry them"... So I've had to do a LOT of hard work around being okay with flirting a little, and letting myself be excited when a guy shows interest in me. And Esther echoes this self-permission in a kind and genuine way.
Another thing I really enjoyed was being able to see her WHOLE journey, in the form of her actual diary entries over the years. It's made even sweeter by the knowledge that she IS dating a wonderful guy (gained a'la TikTok), so it makes the reader root for her even more in her ups and downs in her dating life and beyond. There were so many segments that felt like something from MY life, and seeing it through Esther's eyes gave me more perspective than I could have conjured on my own!
Overall, an easy and fun read that brings a little bit of sparkle-eyed joy and wonder to this whole singleness journey! Thank you for sharing in vulnerability and telling it like it is, Esther!
September 20, 2024
I’m sure that Esther and I aren’t aligned on everything theologically, and I’m not about to say that everything in this book was something that I 100% agreed with. However it gets 5 stars because it spoke to my soul in a way that no other book on singleness ever has. It was filled with messages I really needed to hear. I felt my heart ache in many of the same ways. I felt like I could have written half of these pages.
Sometimes I think that we look at singleness as a disease where if we can just find the cure it will all be better. It leaves those who are single wondering what we are doing wrong. However, maybe it’s less about the destination and the specific milestones in life and the steps we need to take to get there. Maybe it’s more about learning to daily love the life God has given us here and now (whatever that looks like) while being intentional about pursuing personal growth. Maybe that’s where we find true joy, even in the midst of the deepest heartbreaks.
Here’s to remembering that I can’t mess up God’s plan for my life! He’s with me each step of the way, and he’ll gently drag me back if I wander. I don’t have to make each decision of my life in fear that I’m going to mess up (as if I were powerful enough to mess up the plans of almighty God). I can live my life in confidence knowing he will always love me, simply because I’m his child. I’ll make mistakes along the way…but somehow, I’m far less afraid of them. I’m far less afraid of my singleness as well.
Wonderful book. I highly recommend it to any other longing single souls out there wondering where you may have took a wrong turn in life
Sometimes I think that we look at singleness as a disease where if we can just find the cure it will all be better. It leaves those who are single wondering what we are doing wrong. However, maybe it’s less about the destination and the specific milestones in life and the steps we need to take to get there. Maybe it’s more about learning to daily love the life God has given us here and now (whatever that looks like) while being intentional about pursuing personal growth. Maybe that’s where we find true joy, even in the midst of the deepest heartbreaks.
Here’s to remembering that I can’t mess up God’s plan for my life! He’s with me each step of the way, and he’ll gently drag me back if I wander. I don’t have to make each decision of my life in fear that I’m going to mess up (as if I were powerful enough to mess up the plans of almighty God). I can live my life in confidence knowing he will always love me, simply because I’m his child. I’ll make mistakes along the way…but somehow, I’m far less afraid of them. I’m far less afraid of my singleness as well.
Wonderful book. I highly recommend it to any other longing single souls out there wondering where you may have took a wrong turn in life
August 27, 2022
i thought this was going to be a biblically based book about singleness but it was more of her singleness journal/diary and her advice, what she’s learned, what God’s been teaching her :)
not mad at that at all! just thought it was gonna be something different
i love how carefree she is and her vulnerability throughout the book
it’s nice to read about people going through the same situations and thoughts you are
not mad at that at all! just thought it was gonna be something different
i love how carefree she is and her vulnerability throughout the book
it’s nice to read about people going through the same situations and thoughts you are
April 14, 2024
In Single Shouldn’t Suck, Esther Marie documents her experience as a single Christian girl from the ages of 22 to 30. During that time, she does A LOT: she lives in a tiny bungalow in California with her two best friends, travels for her work as a nanny, becomes a surf instructor, starts a ministry, goes camping, snowboards, goes to Australia, dates boys and figures out what she is looking for in a man who loves God, and goes back to school. Overall, she encourages readers to use singleness as a time to learn more about themselves and God, go on adventures, and chase their dreams. This book is inspiring. If you are a single Christian girl, you should check it out!
July 4, 2024
I didn't really enjoy the book but I also don't like to read stories about love..I thought this book would be about something else. Quotes I enjoyed are below:
"We long for a companion, physical connection, and a spiritual partner. These are beautiful, God-given longings that should never be ignored, suppressed, or downplayed. If God created the desire, we can most certainly trust Him to guide us along the path of longing and instruct us to navigate healthy choices to find fulfillment."
" Jesus longs to be intimate with us. He longs for access to our hearts and the areas we think He's incapable of filling."
"We long for a companion, physical connection, and a spiritual partner. These are beautiful, God-given longings that should never be ignored, suppressed, or downplayed. If God created the desire, we can most certainly trust Him to guide us along the path of longing and instruct us to navigate healthy choices to find fulfillment."
" Jesus longs to be intimate with us. He longs for access to our hearts and the areas we think He's incapable of filling."
February 2, 2025
This book is not written for me. I’m not a naive 20 something trusting God to help find love in my life. I’m a 40 something divorced single mom that is complete cynical about love and feel that God has way more important matters than worrying about my poor choices in the ways of love. Is she full of hope, yes. Did I hate that and want to pop that balloon for her, also yes.
February 14, 2025
Felt appropriate to finish this book on Valentines Day. 😂
Book has a lot of great content about enjoying the life you have, while balancing the desire for the life you want which I definitely appreciated!
Book has a lot of great content about enjoying the life you have, while balancing the desire for the life you want which I definitely appreciated!
July 31, 2025
read it
If you’ve been question sheathed or not you want to read this book or it’s been in your tbr for a while, take this as a sign to read this book. I’m not going to tell you about it because different people should glean different things from it. Just read it babes.
If you’ve been question sheathed or not you want to read this book or it’s been in your tbr for a while, take this as a sign to read this book. I’m not going to tell you about it because different people should glean different things from it. Just read it babes.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews