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Apocalypse Blockers #13
Witchetty-Woo
Bruce thinks he is helping mankind and playing his part in saving the planet when he develops his serum for speeding up the development of lab-grown cultured meat.
What Bruce has actually done is send us to the bottom of the food chain; well not all the way to the bottom. we are still above Ducks. Nobody gets eaten by a Duck.
What Bruce has actually done is send us to the bottom of the food chain; well not all the way to the bottom. we are still above Ducks. Nobody gets eaten by a Duck.
222 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 26, 2022
2 people are currently reading
9 people want to read
About the author
Simon Carr
39 books151 followersSimon carr is, well he is me, hello. I write comedy Sci-fi and horror books. I started writing in 2018. I am severely dyslexic, on the very high end of the scale. So, writing a book was just me being defiant really, doing something I ought never to have been capable of doing.
I really enjoyed writing my first book, Space And Stuff, so I carried on writing. That makes it sound a lot simpler than it was, but after a lot of learning and editing; so much editing! And going through proofreaders at a rate of knotts, I got my books to a standard that only made a few grammar Nazis heads explode; so it will have to do.
I am from Blackburn in the UK, born in the summer of 1976. I have actually won three awards for my books, I know! I was as surprised as you are. If perfect grammar is your thing then you might want to give them a miss, but if you like satire and goofy scenarios I might be what you have been looking for.
I really enjoyed writing my first book, Space And Stuff, so I carried on writing. That makes it sound a lot simpler than it was, but after a lot of learning and editing; so much editing! And going through proofreaders at a rate of knotts, I got my books to a standard that only made a few grammar Nazis heads explode; so it will have to do.
I am from Blackburn in the UK, born in the summer of 1976. I have actually won three awards for my books, I know! I was as surprised as you are. If perfect grammar is your thing then you might want to give them a miss, but if you like satire and goofy scenarios I might be what you have been looking for.
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
July 12, 2022
Awesome
Summon Carr, is a genius. I don't know what else to say. Witchetty-woo is kind of gross, but hilarious at the same time. I would recommend it to most of my friends who like horror/comedy.
It's awesome.
Summon Carr, is a genius. I don't know what else to say. Witchetty-woo is kind of gross, but hilarious at the same time. I would recommend it to most of my friends who like horror/comedy.
It's awesome.
June 22, 2022
This is first horror/monster story I’ve read or watched as a movie that is set in Australia. Perhaps I’ve led a sheltered life and missed them. This book reads like a monster movie in my mind. The story used many of the quintessential elements of the 40s and 50s monster films and I love those films. We are presented with multiple monsters slowly picking off the lesser characters in a predictable fashion. The plot slowly makes it’s way and eventually finds each character being eaten in an appropriate order by the monsters one by one. It may seem I’m dropping spoilers but never fear you will never quite figure out what comes around the corner on the next few pages. Take all of that and wrap it in several layers of hilarity. This story is a great satire sending up those monster movies I grew up with. This is an adult book with adult humor……
but for us adults, ENJOY!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
but for us adults, ENJOY!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
December 11, 2023
I love Simon Carr's ideas, and I love the Apocalypse Blockers. This one was, on the whole, a great book. It was fast-paced, full of Carr's ridiculously hilarious total disregard for the PC/woke crowd, and just plain silly in places. It was Carr at his best. However, I struggled with it, and I dreaded reading it some days because the copy I received was just not edited, and that's not something I'm used to. Small editing issues I don't think about or much notice, but when words are repeated throughout the book, it becomes distracting and difficult to read. It seemed in a few places that at least one of the character's names had changed mid-story. I decided it didn't matter enough in the whole scheme of things to go all the way back to the beginning and figure it out, cuz I was confused enough by the rest of what I was reading. I'm thinking it could have been a classic Carr moment, too! Overall, it's still good and warrants a 4-star rating. If not for the confusing elements, I'd have given a 5-star rating!
November 28, 2022
There is good news and bad news. Overwhelmingly good, but let me get the bad out of the way first, and the reason I gave this book four stars instead of five. The grammar in Simon Carr’s WITCHETTY-WOO needs some work, and there are some possible typos. I say possible typos because maybe things like having Bolshevik remain a major, living character after being killed and eaten were intentional. If so it would fit with some of the other subtle (and often far from subtle) jabs at giant monster movies in the book. If you’re a fan of such movies you can often tell which ones Carr is making fun of at different points in WITCHETTY-WOO. Carr might have missed a few bits of silliness such movies are notorious for, but not many. Irrelevant characters only put in so they can be killed, check. Creatures growing to biologically and physically impossible sizes, check. Said creatures reaching those sizes without enough food to reach one one hundredth of the mass they achieve, check. Reaching those sizes in impossibly short times, check. Some totally absurd way of killing said monsters being found, check. I could go on, but you get the idea. One thing Carr is big on, which some but not all giant monster movies include, is humor. Constant humor, occasionally with a much deserved stab at some social issue. I much prefer a good story to perfect grammar, and this was a very good story. It was a constant grin and an occasional outright laugh. If you like giant monster stories, and enjoy laughing at the ridiculous things in them, you will love WITCHETTY-WOO by Simon Carr.
October 15, 2022
Yet another winner from Simon Carr. Not his funniest book but his best so far and the narrator is perfect. Think tremors meets Eight legged freaks with a touch of Mothra thrown in all set in a forgotten outback town. The usual idiotic heroes, a psychotic kangaroo, zombie rabbit and pineapple of leadership, with a science gone wrong plot and gruesome deaths what's not to love. Simon makes fun of all the monster movies you have ever seen but with great style. Minor characters are routinely used as creature fodder, heroes pose with flames in the background, and It is all science and big businesses fault. Loved it. Brilliant fun. Geoffrey Boyes does a superb job and is perfect. Keep it up I love these books
June 23, 2023
We’re you a bootlegger before this
This was ok and slightly funny for someone people I guess but the chacthers all seemed abit to simple in the head to be realistic personality types.
The above part wasn’t even why I gave this a low review score it’s how the story feels like a parody bootlegger edition of Tremors. Like some read the synopsis for the first movie an lay at it they where watching the movie ‘eight legged freaks’ and mixed an match things from they”s two to create a story that’d be confused in if they stole the ideas from there. I hoped story would be somewhat different ending but really I couldn’t even stand it lay some we’ll probably enjoy this does who saw the too above movies not so mugh.
This was ok and slightly funny for someone people I guess but the chacthers all seemed abit to simple in the head to be realistic personality types.
The above part wasn’t even why I gave this a low review score it’s how the story feels like a parody bootlegger edition of Tremors. Like some read the synopsis for the first movie an lay at it they where watching the movie ‘eight legged freaks’ and mixed an match things from they”s two to create a story that’d be confused in if they stole the ideas from there. I hoped story would be somewhat different ending but really I couldn’t even stand it lay some we’ll probably enjoy this does who saw the too above movies not so mugh.
October 13, 2022
I found this story entertaining. Simon Carr wrote a tale in which his main protagonist, Bruce, planned to help mankind when things went wrong. The story was amusing and horrifying at the same time, but also thought-provoking as it pointed to the possible danger posed by science experimentation. Geoffrey Boyes' narration was great, and his performance added to the story's entertainment. I was given a free copy of the audiobook, and I have voluntarily posted this review.
October 29, 2022
Witchetty-Woo (Apocalypse blockers Book 13) by Simon Carr is a hilariously funny monster horror story! Simon Carr never disappoints!
I received a free copy of this book through StoryOrigin and am voluntarily leaving a review.
I received a free copy of this book through StoryOrigin and am voluntarily leaving a review.
July 4, 2023
Prepare for a wild ride as Simon Carr's "Witchetty-Woo" takes you on a twisted adventure filled with unexpected consequences and a dash of dark humor. Carr's writing is sharp and witty, keeping you hooked from start to finish, while Geoffrey Boyes brings the characters to life with his captivating narration. Don't miss this delightfully bizarre tale that will leave you questioning your next meal... and hoping to avoid any encounters with ducks.
April 10, 2022
Bruce is a genius. He has developed a way of increasing the growth rate of meat cultured in the laboratory in order to eradicate famine, global warming and that overpowering stench you get in the countryside.
However, Bruce didn’t fully test his invention and it has a completely unwanted and very dangerous effect on shellfish and insects.
Despite destroying all of his research, one of the vials of Bruce’s formula finds its way into the food chain in a small town in the Australian Outback and that’s where the fun begins
Yet another completely balmy gigglefest from the author, featuring a cast of memorable characters and a plot that involves giant witchetty grubs, enormous huntsman’s spiders and a massive moth reminiscent of the old Godzilla movies.
If you haven’t read anything by Simon Carr then this is a good introduction to his very readable style.
However, Bruce didn’t fully test his invention and it has a completely unwanted and very dangerous effect on shellfish and insects.
Despite destroying all of his research, one of the vials of Bruce’s formula finds its way into the food chain in a small town in the Australian Outback and that’s where the fun begins
Yet another completely balmy gigglefest from the author, featuring a cast of memorable characters and a plot that involves giant witchetty grubs, enormous huntsman’s spiders and a massive moth reminiscent of the old Godzilla movies.
If you haven’t read anything by Simon Carr then this is a good introduction to his very readable style.
June 22, 2022
A Witchetty is a type of wood moth native to Australia.. Normally, it's grub is about an inch long and as a moth it is about moth sized. This is the story of a small industrial food additive spill that results in a fifty feet tall grub.
Simon Carr's horror novel is filled with his less than subtle humor and mayhem. Snarky asides and speculation run amok like in all his books. Very good story and interesting characters.
This novel is written in Carr's more recently adopted traditional form of storytelling. He does a very good job of it. I do miss his more stream of consciousness and rambling style used in his Space/Time Fantasy series of books. That may be why this got a four instead of five stars.
Respect the Pineapple!
Simon Carr's horror novel is filled with his less than subtle humor and mayhem. Snarky asides and speculation run amok like in all his books. Very good story and interesting characters.
This novel is written in Carr's more recently adopted traditional form of storytelling. He does a very good job of it. I do miss his more stream of consciousness and rambling style used in his Space/Time Fantasy series of books. That may be why this got a four instead of five stars.
Respect the Pineapple!
October 1, 2022
Simon has nailed it yet again!! The narrator knocked it out of the park as well. This is such a great adventure. It’s like a bit of tremors mixed with crocodile Dundee and a dash of tmnt secret ooze mutations. I would love to see choggy in real life just to see his eyebrows in action. The many descriptions of these are great. I love the secret plan of getting the signatures from the residents whilst feeling zero guilt. I’ve learnt a couple of things as well, if it smells funky, you need antibiotics and if you want to be crowned as the mayor, you’ll need a pineapple
April 8, 2022
This book is really weird, funny, cheesy and stupid rolled into a good story! Lol Really though, the story itself is really cool and the characters are pretty dang good. Some of what was kinda cute/funny in the beginning gets old though and too much of it. I think it would have been better if some of the idiosyncrasies had been left out! I give it a 3 1/2 stars, if you aren't as quickly irratated by three stooges type of humor you'll like it even more.
April 15, 2022
Bugs, bugs, bugs and Simon Carr...what a mixture. If you are looking for a serious book, keep scrolling. If you are looking to waste a bit of time in a fantasy bug world with no rhyme or reason, you have found it. As usual Simon has stretched the illusion of normalcy further and further. These bugs will send you scrambling for the raid while shaking your head wondering where the heck he manages to come up with these books.
March 29, 2022
Simon Carr has hit another milestone with his latest horror story of mankind accidentally becoming a part of the food chain! You have to read it to believe it. If you enjoy and are waiting for an unusual take on the horror theme this novel is for you! I received this novel from StoryOrigin. This is my true and honest review.
October 28, 2022
Witchetty-Woo (Apocalypse blockers Book 13) by Simon Carr is a hilariously funny monster horror story! Simon Carr never disappoints! I received a free copy of this book through StoryOrigin and am voluntarily leaving a review.
November 6, 2022
Funny. Scary. Strange characters. Qwerty events. Silly. Gross. Even violent. Eaten by insects. Yes, very gross. You'll love it!
I received an Audible version of this book from the author through Story Origin. The narrator was outstanding. 5 stars for him.
I received an Audible version of this book from the author through Story Origin. The narrator was outstanding. 5 stars for him.
April 2, 2022
This is a bit of a bizarre tongue in cheek slap stick, lightly amusing comedy! If you like the monte python daft humour, then this is for you!
November 4, 2022
never expected it when i decided to read it, a couple stories coming together as one, talk about monsters of your dreams. If like bugs and such you gotta read this.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews