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The Asperkid's (Secret) Book of Social Rules, 10th Anniversary Edition
Being a teen or tween is tough for anyone. And if you're on the Autism Spectrum, life can feel like a game you're playing without knowing the rules. Jennifer Cook knows - she's been there! Her internationally bestselling handbook is the key to unlocking those unwritten, often confusing, not-so-obvious social guidelines and bolstering confidence, all at once.
Finally, teens can play the game of life with instructions. The 10th Anniversary Edition of The (Secret) Book of Social Rules reveals the essential secrets behind the baffling social codes surrounding making and keeping friends, dating, and catastrophic conversation pitfalls, with all-new content on social media and talking about neurodiversity. It's no wonder Jennifer's is the navigation tool tens of thousands of fans have come to love! Full of brand-new funny illustrations, take-it-from-me explanations, and comic strip examples, this Book of the Year award winner is real, positive, and speaks from the heart (without ever sounding like your mother's guide to manners). It's confidence, humor, and smarts. For the Human Spectrum.
Finally, teens can play the game of life with instructions. The 10th Anniversary Edition of The (Secret) Book of Social Rules reveals the essential secrets behind the baffling social codes surrounding making and keeping friends, dating, and catastrophic conversation pitfalls, with all-new content on social media and talking about neurodiversity. It's no wonder Jennifer's is the navigation tool tens of thousands of fans have come to love! Full of brand-new funny illustrations, take-it-from-me explanations, and comic strip examples, this Book of the Year award winner is real, positive, and speaks from the heart (without ever sounding like your mother's guide to manners). It's confidence, humor, and smarts. For the Human Spectrum.
304 pages, Paperback
Published June 21, 2022
10 people are currently reading
57 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
April 2, 2024
Read a section every night with our 12 year old recently diagnosed son. We all loved it. Sparked some great conversations and was fascinating to see which things he struggled with most. Highly recommended.
May 21, 2022
I would like to thank NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for providing a free e-ARC of The Asperkids’s (Secret) Book of Social Rules, 10th Anniversary Edition, in exchange for a fair and honest review.
When I first heard about this book, I was intrigued and excited about it. As an autistic person, I never really got a whole lot of #ActuallyAutistic representation in the books I read growing up. I also never knew that there were books like this growing up and I felt inclined to read this book as I wanted to see what her perspective was as an #ActuallyAutistic author.
That being said, I definitely feel that this book is worth the read for anyone on the Spectrum. While the main target audience for this book is for teenagers, I feel that there is something to be learned among autistic adults after reading this book. I know that I have found some really good advice after reading. Additionally, I like how Cook makes an effort to address the diversity and vastness of the spectrum in the advice she gives during the book.
Personally, I really like this book because of how relatable Cook is. Even though she wasn’t diagnosed until later on as an adult, I feel that the best part about this book is how she ties in her own experiences as an Autistic woman with each chapter of the book.
Overall, this is a must-read for autistic people as well as anyone else who identifies as neurodivergent. This was a quick and easy to read book that you will want to keep as a reference guide in the future.
When I first heard about this book, I was intrigued and excited about it. As an autistic person, I never really got a whole lot of #ActuallyAutistic representation in the books I read growing up. I also never knew that there were books like this growing up and I felt inclined to read this book as I wanted to see what her perspective was as an #ActuallyAutistic author.
That being said, I definitely feel that this book is worth the read for anyone on the Spectrum. While the main target audience for this book is for teenagers, I feel that there is something to be learned among autistic adults after reading this book. I know that I have found some really good advice after reading. Additionally, I like how Cook makes an effort to address the diversity and vastness of the spectrum in the advice she gives during the book.
Personally, I really like this book because of how relatable Cook is. Even though she wasn’t diagnosed until later on as an adult, I feel that the best part about this book is how she ties in her own experiences as an Autistic woman with each chapter of the book.
Overall, this is a must-read for autistic people as well as anyone else who identifies as neurodivergent. This was a quick and easy to read book that you will want to keep as a reference guide in the future.
June 20, 2022
This is definitely a fantastic concept. As a person who is neurotypical, I don't feel qualified to evaluate the effectiveness of the guidance and advice provided, but I have confidence in the author as an Own Voices writer. I can say that all of the rules described made sense and seemed accurate to me and it was interesting to have someone put the "why" into words for things I've just always accepted as norms.
This would be appropriate for anyone reading at an approximately 5th grade level or above and would make a great addition to school and community libraries as well as the bookshelves of school psychologists and other support workers.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!
This would be appropriate for anyone reading at an approximately 5th grade level or above and would make a great addition to school and community libraries as well as the bookshelves of school psychologists and other support workers.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!
June 18, 2023
I got this book because one of my kids was recently diagnosed, but as I read it…I realized either I was a hypochondriac (definitely possible) or I have always had Aspberger’s too (??!?) Some chapters were definitely more helpful than others, and I love how it incorporates quotes from “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” but it had enough golden nuggets to make it quite valuable to my understanding of not only Aspberger’s, but the world.
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September 8, 2022I'm an autistic adult rather than a kid, but there was still a lot to be gained from this book, and as someone who was late-diagnosed, I wish I'd had this book years ago! HIghly recommended to those on the spectrum, and those who care for them or work with them.
September 28, 2022
I’m going to start this review by saying that I’m actually an adult, rather than a teenager. Additionally, I have not been officially diagnosed with Autism. Instead I have had two professionals who are not qualified to give Autism diagnoses in my province (a doctor and a counsellor) tell me that I am most likely Autistic. While I wish that I had been properly evaluated as a child, as it makes it much easier to get a diagnosis, that was not the case. As such, I went through my whole life just being weird and making social blunders without even realizing it. Correcting adults as a child (I honestly didn’t know that was wrong until now, I mean, they were incorrect… ), squeezing past people without a word (which I thought was fine unless you didn’t touch them!), and asking substitute teachers why everyone was sitting by their friends instead of in their assigned seats (which is apparently tattling?). I’ve learned by doing and making errors, which did not earn me friends. Even if I had learned that I was (maybe) Autistic, I was not sure how to learn these implicit social rules, except through trial and error, which is honestly a harsh way to learn for a kid. I wish I’d had a resource like this back when I needed it.
As an adult, I think this book helped me a bit, but some of the rules were rather obvious to me because I had already learned them or perhaps not struggled with a few in the first place. Actually, some of them struck me as so alien that I questioned their validity, which maybe speaks to how inept I am socially. I mean, shouldn’t you “tell” on someone if they are breaking the rules? I’ve learned that it unfortunately doesn’t make you friends, but my moral compass is very rigid. Which I guess is the author’s point! Also, making friends is way more difficult than the author makes it out to be, although she did sound a bit like a social butterfly. I must say that I liked the informal tone she used. It was informative without being condescending.
I do have a few proper critiques though. First of all, the hygiene chapter. I understand the author was likely being general to avoid confusion, but people with curly hair should not brush or comb it unless it is wet, and certainly not make a point of doing it every day. My hair turns into a poofy disaster if I brush it, and I’m sure it’s even worse for people with curlier hair. She also says the answer to how often you should wash your hair is debatable, but still settles on washing your hair every day or every other day. Again, this advice will work well for some people but not for others. She also has a whole paragraph on makeup without mentioning that’s it up to you whether you would like to wear it or not. I know some people believe it’s necessary, but Autism comes with sensory difficulties. I don’t think it’s right to force teenagers to wear makeup if it makes them uncomfortable. Again, this could just be me, but I don’t think it’s necessary to wear makeup. Maybe my personal hygiene just sucks, but I think this chapter in particular could use a little bit of work. Additionally, in the “Sticky Notes” section, the tip about not waking up someone who is sleeping was repeated.
Anyway, to sum up, I found this book somewhat useful as an adult, but also slightly flawed and subject to interpretation. I do think it would be incredibly useful for the actual age group it was intended for though. 4/5 September 27 2022
As an adult, I think this book helped me a bit, but some of the rules were rather obvious to me because I had already learned them or perhaps not struggled with a few in the first place. Actually, some of them struck me as so alien that I questioned their validity, which maybe speaks to how inept I am socially. I mean, shouldn’t you “tell” on someone if they are breaking the rules? I’ve learned that it unfortunately doesn’t make you friends, but my moral compass is very rigid. Which I guess is the author’s point! Also, making friends is way more difficult than the author makes it out to be, although she did sound a bit like a social butterfly. I must say that I liked the informal tone she used. It was informative without being condescending.
I do have a few proper critiques though. First of all, the hygiene chapter. I understand the author was likely being general to avoid confusion, but people with curly hair should not brush or comb it unless it is wet, and certainly not make a point of doing it every day. My hair turns into a poofy disaster if I brush it, and I’m sure it’s even worse for people with curlier hair. She also says the answer to how often you should wash your hair is debatable, but still settles on washing your hair every day or every other day. Again, this advice will work well for some people but not for others. She also has a whole paragraph on makeup without mentioning that’s it up to you whether you would like to wear it or not. I know some people believe it’s necessary, but Autism comes with sensory difficulties. I don’t think it’s right to force teenagers to wear makeup if it makes them uncomfortable. Again, this could just be me, but I don’t think it’s necessary to wear makeup. Maybe my personal hygiene just sucks, but I think this chapter in particular could use a little bit of work. Additionally, in the “Sticky Notes” section, the tip about not waking up someone who is sleeping was repeated.
Anyway, to sum up, I found this book somewhat useful as an adult, but also slightly flawed and subject to interpretation. I do think it would be incredibly useful for the actual age group it was intended for though. 4/5 September 27 2022
May 16, 2022
This book should have been called How to be Human 101 & everyone should get a copy!!
This instructional-like book could be helpful to ALL young adults and especially neurodivergent young adults. Whatever type of neurodivergence, diagnosed or not, this guide will be source of information you likely will not find in another book. As others have reviewed, I wish that I had this book as a younger adult or teen. I also think this would be a great reference tool for therapists and counselors to work with young adults to talk through and discuss issues from everyday hygiene to complicated social skills told in a blunt yet clear and caring way.
The illustrations help keep the topics fun and lighthearted and help to continue to keep the readers interested.
Grateful to have received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley & Jessica Kingsley Publishers
This instructional-like book could be helpful to ALL young adults and especially neurodivergent young adults. Whatever type of neurodivergence, diagnosed or not, this guide will be source of information you likely will not find in another book. As others have reviewed, I wish that I had this book as a younger adult or teen. I also think this would be a great reference tool for therapists and counselors to work with young adults to talk through and discuss issues from everyday hygiene to complicated social skills told in a blunt yet clear and caring way.
The illustrations help keep the topics fun and lighthearted and help to continue to keep the readers interested.
Grateful to have received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley & Jessica Kingsley Publishers
June 21, 2022
I struggled to love this book, but not because it wasn't amazing. I struggled to love this book because I am jealous this book exists for children and teens, while it didn't exist for my brothers or I when we were younger. As an autistic person, surrouded by autistic family members, this book would have been invaluable for us as we navigated high school life, social situations, and so much more. I am grateful that this book is written by an "actually autistic" person, as so often books about autism are written by doctors, people who have parented autistic children, or other such well-minded folks who have no idea what it's like to have our brains. I would love to add this book to my classroom library, so other autistic kiddos can have it like I wish I'd had it when I was their age!
October 30, 2022
This book provides helpful information for anyone with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Although, it is titled as being for teens/tweens, it can be used for any age. It is written in a simple, rules based style, which may be relatable to individuals with Autism. The topics selected were those that are relevant and that many kids will struggle with. This book can assist with how to navigate social exchanges, how to engage in reciprocal conversations, when to use politeness markers, and many other social skills necessary in everyday life. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advance review copy in exchange for my honest review.
May 17, 2022
I can only review this theoretically as a mother who had an Asperkid living in our neighborhood when my kids were growing up. This pre-teen was a friend of my son, and really could have used the kind of help found in this book. He wasn't diagnosed until he was an adult, so we just thought he was sort of a weird young man with dysfunctional parents. I don't want to say more except that he was at our house often and we had our ups and downs with his behavior.
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March 18, 2023
This was nice!
June 27, 2025
This book was ok.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews