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How to Talk to a Man and Feel Heard: 9 Mistakes Women Need To Avoid
Want better communication? Discover fresh insight and simple changes that can help sustain a loving, satisfying relationship.
Do you simply try to share about your day, and he gets frustrated and accuses you of being all over the place?
Do casual conversations with your partner turn into arguments, and you have no idea how you got there?
Do you feel a disconnect in your relationship because you don't feel heard?
Don't worry - you're not the only one going through this. According to John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, and Women Are from Venus, "The number one complaint women have in relationships is: I don't feel heard."
Communication is one of the most common relationship problems that couples experience, and it can lead to much unnecessary conflict.
No matter how much you and your husband or boyfriend love each other, sometimes what you say (or don't say) and how you say it can get in the way.
This book will show you what could be wrong with your conversations that you aren't even aware of and offer helpful tips and strategies to break old patterns and change the dynamics of how you communicate and connect as a couple.
In How to Talk to a Man and Feel Heard: 9 Mistakes Women Need to Avoid, you will discover:
● The worst mistake you can make on a first date - this may be why he never called back!
● The root cause of most communication issues you two face - why it feels like you and the man you love are speaking two different languages
● An enlightened way to approach communication as a couple - how to truly understand where each of you is coming from
● How you can set your conversations up for success with this simple adjustment
● 13 sincere compliments you can say to make him feel valued and appreciated
● How you may be unknowingly undermining and insulting him, despite intending to do the opposite
● Romantic date ideas beyond dinner and a movie that will strengthen your bond and make you feel more connected to each other
● Why he just can't seem to follow your instructions, and how you can make errands easier for both of you
● Two small words with a damaging footprint - using these words may put him on the defense and destroy your chances of being heard
Communicating with the opposite sex can be confusing and frustrating, especially when you're in an intimate relationship... but it doesn't have to be.
Whether you're just starting a new relationship, you've been married for decades, or you want tips for your next relationship, you can find techniques to fix the things in your conversation that aren't working and enhance those that are right now.
While it's impossible to magically transform your relationship overnight, with time, practice, and a deliberate intent to break the old patterns, you may achieve a closeness you never imagined possible.
If you want to improve your communication skills and feel heard and understood in your relationship - grab your copy today!
Do you simply try to share about your day, and he gets frustrated and accuses you of being all over the place?
Do casual conversations with your partner turn into arguments, and you have no idea how you got there?
Do you feel a disconnect in your relationship because you don't feel heard?
Don't worry - you're not the only one going through this. According to John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, and Women Are from Venus, "The number one complaint women have in relationships is: I don't feel heard."
Communication is one of the most common relationship problems that couples experience, and it can lead to much unnecessary conflict.
No matter how much you and your husband or boyfriend love each other, sometimes what you say (or don't say) and how you say it can get in the way.
This book will show you what could be wrong with your conversations that you aren't even aware of and offer helpful tips and strategies to break old patterns and change the dynamics of how you communicate and connect as a couple.
In How to Talk to a Man and Feel Heard: 9 Mistakes Women Need to Avoid, you will discover:
● The worst mistake you can make on a first date - this may be why he never called back!
● The root cause of most communication issues you two face - why it feels like you and the man you love are speaking two different languages
● An enlightened way to approach communication as a couple - how to truly understand where each of you is coming from
● How you can set your conversations up for success with this simple adjustment
● 13 sincere compliments you can say to make him feel valued and appreciated
● How you may be unknowingly undermining and insulting him, despite intending to do the opposite
● Romantic date ideas beyond dinner and a movie that will strengthen your bond and make you feel more connected to each other
● Why he just can't seem to follow your instructions, and how you can make errands easier for both of you
● Two small words with a damaging footprint - using these words may put him on the defense and destroy your chances of being heard
Communicating with the opposite sex can be confusing and frustrating, especially when you're in an intimate relationship... but it doesn't have to be.
Whether you're just starting a new relationship, you've been married for decades, or you want tips for your next relationship, you can find techniques to fix the things in your conversation that aren't working and enhance those that are right now.
While it's impossible to magically transform your relationship overnight, with time, practice, and a deliberate intent to break the old patterns, you may achieve a closeness you never imagined possible.
If you want to improve your communication skills and feel heard and understood in your relationship - grab your copy today!
- GenresAudiobookNonfiction
191 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 8, 2022
144 people are currently reading
80 people want to read
About the author
Sue Shepard
1 bookSue Shepard is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and the author of How to Talk to a Man and Feel Heard: 9 Mistakes Women Need to Avoid.
Sue has been working with both couples and individuals for over 20 years and is passionate about helping people improve their relationships. Her first book focuses on communication issues, aiming to guide women towards better understanding in their relationships, and giving them the tools they need to not only communicate effectively with their partners, but also to feel confident that they’re truly being heard.
Driving her writing is the culmination of years of experience and witnessing the relationship transformations triggered by simple changes. Sue sees the same communication issues arising for couples time and time again, and she knows that they can often be avoided by side-stepping common mistakes. By sharing this information in the form of a book, she hopes to positively impact as many relationships as possible.
Sue has a four-legged assistant: her beloved rescue dog, Izzi, who clients claim has a deeply calming effect on them. In her spare time, Sue loves walking with Izzi on the beach, where she delights in collecting heart-shaped rocks. She also has a strong creative streak and finds joy in doing Alphabet Photography, blending this skill with design to create beautiful greetings cards.
Sue is passionate about her work as a therapist and transitioned from a business career at IBM over two decades ago. She has a postgraduate degree in Clinical Psychology and currently sees clients in her private practice located in Orange County, California. Having personally benefited from therapy, Sue is of the firm belief that psychotherapy is a powerful tool for human growth, healing, and self-acceptance.
Sue has been working with both couples and individuals for over 20 years and is passionate about helping people improve their relationships. Her first book focuses on communication issues, aiming to guide women towards better understanding in their relationships, and giving them the tools they need to not only communicate effectively with their partners, but also to feel confident that they’re truly being heard.
Driving her writing is the culmination of years of experience and witnessing the relationship transformations triggered by simple changes. Sue sees the same communication issues arising for couples time and time again, and she knows that they can often be avoided by side-stepping common mistakes. By sharing this information in the form of a book, she hopes to positively impact as many relationships as possible.
Sue has a four-legged assistant: her beloved rescue dog, Izzi, who clients claim has a deeply calming effect on them. In her spare time, Sue loves walking with Izzi on the beach, where she delights in collecting heart-shaped rocks. She also has a strong creative streak and finds joy in doing Alphabet Photography, blending this skill with design to create beautiful greetings cards.
Sue is passionate about her work as a therapist and transitioned from a business career at IBM over two decades ago. She has a postgraduate degree in Clinical Psychology and currently sees clients in her private practice located in Orange County, California. Having personally benefited from therapy, Sue is of the firm belief that psychotherapy is a powerful tool for human growth, healing, and self-acceptance.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
July 22, 2022
This book provides a guide based on gender differences. All the way through, though, it felt to me as if we women need to wear "kid gloves" too often in talking with men. There's no admission of onus on them to do work to improve the coupledom. Nor is there explanation about what to do next, should each piece of advice not work. Rather, it's presented as if everything will work on the first try. As a woman who's finally with a good man, having divorced an abusive one years ago, and as a mental health therapist, I want to tell women that if you have to keep working very hard to have simple, daily conversations, he's toxic. It'll never work, and it's not your fault.
January 14, 2023
Useful book for Improving Communication
This book contains 9 typical problems that can appear in any relationship. The author explained communication styles between men and women really well, and reading it helped me find out why my partner behaves in a certain way when solving daily problems.
I tried advice for improving my communication with my partner, and it really worked!
Also, the way this book is written and organized is very convenient. When I re-read this book, I found it useful to get back to the key take outs placed at the end of each chapter.
I would recommend this book to women who desire to create a strong bond with their life partners.
This book contains 9 typical problems that can appear in any relationship. The author explained communication styles between men and women really well, and reading it helped me find out why my partner behaves in a certain way when solving daily problems.
I tried advice for improving my communication with my partner, and it really worked!
Also, the way this book is written and organized is very convenient. When I re-read this book, I found it useful to get back to the key take outs placed at the end of each chapter.
I would recommend this book to women who desire to create a strong bond with their life partners.
October 25, 2022
Ok ok ok hear me out...
The title sounds really bad but it's a really good book on communication. Honestly, it is a bit stereotypical but judgements aside there are some really good points that can save you a lot of unnecessary conflict.
For example, the author suggests changing "could you" to "would you" and honestly I never realized how much I use can/could instead of would. This is really a lesson on direct communication!
10/10
The title sounds really bad but it's a really good book on communication. Honestly, it is a bit stereotypical but judgements aside there are some really good points that can save you a lot of unnecessary conflict.
For example, the author suggests changing "could you" to "would you" and honestly I never realized how much I use can/could instead of would. This is really a lesson on direct communication!
10/10
April 12, 2022
I was pleasantly surprised by how many new ideas I got from this book. I have a good relationship with my husband, but I learned things I can do differently that will make it even better. The book is well-written, and the author uses everyday examples that were easy to relate to and apply to my relationship. I also liked that there were Takeaway Tips at the end of each chapter - they summed up the concepts in each chapter very nicely. I highly recommend this book!
February 13, 2023
Wasn’t for me
This book just wasn’t for me, and I completely understand that others will feel differently I just really didn’t like the over stigmatizing of gender roles. I was truly looking for something different than what I have read in the past.
This book just wasn’t for me, and I completely understand that others will feel differently I just really didn’t like the over stigmatizing of gender roles. I was truly looking for something different than what I have read in the past.
April 21, 2022
Being married 37 years, I picked up this book because I was curious to learn about what Ms. Shepard thought the 9 mistakes , as woman we should avoid when communicating with Men. After reading the book, I was not surprised to find that many of my married life experiences were shared here. Situations that my husband and I spent time , attempting to find a communication style that supported a respectful dialog. In our experience, we thought after being married 37 years , this would be easy, but just the slight differences in our communication style, could make something simple , or very difficult.
Ms. Shepard, explains how basic and simple changes, if used consistently can help and assist in building back the courtesy and easy going relationship, many of us are hoping to share once again.
I appreciated the end of chapter summaries, and I felt that using the suggestions would help me give and get more information to assist both of us to understand our needs. Learning about how men are wired and how it is different from how woman process information was so revealing. Especially how it comes into play in our communication styles.
I feel that reading this book was useful and I that all couples could benefit from the communication suggestions.
Thank you for the "Pearls of wisdom" It's not always easy to see this subject clearly, especially at times when you do not feel like your thoughts and statements are being cared about and or heard. I think this book can help woman and in turn couples find a more satisfying way to communicate.
Ms. Shepard, explains how basic and simple changes, if used consistently can help and assist in building back the courtesy and easy going relationship, many of us are hoping to share once again.
I appreciated the end of chapter summaries, and I felt that using the suggestions would help me give and get more information to assist both of us to understand our needs. Learning about how men are wired and how it is different from how woman process information was so revealing. Especially how it comes into play in our communication styles.
I feel that reading this book was useful and I that all couples could benefit from the communication suggestions.
Thank you for the "Pearls of wisdom" It's not always easy to see this subject clearly, especially at times when you do not feel like your thoughts and statements are being cared about and or heard. I think this book can help woman and in turn couples find a more satisfying way to communicate.
May 28, 2023
Great advice!
This is a must for women! Oftentimes women will place blame on a man for not being emotionally available or responsive, and not being able to communicate effectively. This book gives a lot of practical suggestions as to how the woman can change that, instead of blaming the man for who he is…not the woman’s girlfriend! The man’s mindset and the way he is prewired to communicate and respond is different from a woman’s, and when a woman talks to him and expects the response she would get if she were talking to her girlfriend, then she will always be disappointed. This book helps to avoid that. Thanks Dr. Shepard!
This is a must for women! Oftentimes women will place blame on a man for not being emotionally available or responsive, and not being able to communicate effectively. This book gives a lot of practical suggestions as to how the woman can change that, instead of blaming the man for who he is…not the woman’s girlfriend! The man’s mindset and the way he is prewired to communicate and respond is different from a woman’s, and when a woman talks to him and expects the response she would get if she were talking to her girlfriend, then she will always be disappointed. This book helps to avoid that. Thanks Dr. Shepard!
November 23, 2022
A Licensed Marriage Therapist Advice
Reading this book was not particularly insightful for me, as a man, struggling to understand ways to communicate with other men. I am not the author’s audience. Still the book was a great resource for women who find it difficult to talk to men in any serious fashion and feel like they are being heard. With 20 years of experience trying to help couples improve their relationships this book is a great guide for women. Nice to see how the other gender struggles to be understood and that it’s not always one or the other at fault.
Reading this book was not particularly insightful for me, as a man, struggling to understand ways to communicate with other men. I am not the author’s audience. Still the book was a great resource for women who find it difficult to talk to men in any serious fashion and feel like they are being heard. With 20 years of experience trying to help couples improve their relationships this book is a great guide for women. Nice to see how the other gender struggles to be understood and that it’s not always one or the other at fault.
November 5, 2022
This is an INCREDIBLE book! It's entertaining, and humorous and helps you peer into the male mind and understand what he's always complaining about! LOL. I realized that I'm making all 9 mistakes and now I understand how to easily fix some of the chronic communication breakdowns my husband and I continually seem to have. I'm going to be listening to this over and over. Great resource! Thanks Sue Shepard!!
October 13, 2022
This book has some really great information, and she says a lot of the same things that I say to my clients every day. I can imagine this would be helpful and eye-opening to many women. I very much dislike the title, because it sounds like she’s blaming women for all the problems in relationships, which she is not. She does address this in the introduction if this is something that bothers you.
September 5, 2023
Overall I liked the book just fine. I often felt like I was reading a 1950s handbook on how to be a "good wife" which irritated me. However, there were some really good takeaways that I think will be very helpful in my communications with the hubs (or other men for that matter). Worth the easy read for a few good nuggets!
May 17, 2022
Good info
I don't know about marriage because if you're a woman and you're having a difficult time with your husband that's abuse. So, I wouldn't recommend marriage until you're sure that your husband is a good listener and takes feelings into consideration.
I don't know about marriage because if you're a woman and you're having a difficult time with your husband that's abuse. So, I wouldn't recommend marriage until you're sure that your husband is a good listener and takes feelings into consideration.
September 2, 2025
very helpful!
I learned quite a bit from this book not only for relationships, but work relationships as well.
I highly recommend this book! This was definitely a game changer for me. Great read!
I learned quite a bit from this book not only for relationships, but work relationships as well.
I highly recommend this book! This was definitely a game changer for me. Great read!
September 21, 2022
Good tips, quick read
This book was easy to follow and has some good basic tips for men and women to understand their differences in communication.
This book was easy to follow and has some good basic tips for men and women to understand their differences in communication.
July 25, 2023
Recommend
It gave me a great sense of understanding how a man thinks w me as a woman. Choosing my words w/ o upset. Keep practicing every day. You can get there
It gave me a great sense of understanding how a man thinks w me as a woman. Choosing my words w/ o upset. Keep practicing every day. You can get there
August 13, 2022
Well-Written
A good reference guide and conversation starter to facilitate real communication in a relationship. I learned a lot from this.
A good reference guide and conversation starter to facilitate real communication in a relationship. I learned a lot from this.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews