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Small Habits for a Big Life
Change is not about grand statements and sweeping gestures. It is about chipping away, a bit at a time, at the habits that hold us back.
Dr Rebecca Ray knows about the power of small habits to make big changes. By introducing small changes into her own life, she transformed her career as a clinical psychologist to become one of Australia's most effective communicators on matters of the mind. Rebecca has helped many members of her large online community and her clients do the same.
In Small Habits for a Big Life, Dr Rebecca Ray breaks down the process for her reader. She explains how we can override the part of the brain that seeks pleasure and comfort (ice cream and wine) and activate the parts that tolerate some discomfort for the sake of long-term goals (an hour of study instead of an hour of TV).
Small Habits for a Big Life clears the way for readers to embark on their own path to change and provides exactly the right amount of support along the way.
Dr Rebecca Ray knows about the power of small habits to make big changes. By introducing small changes into her own life, she transformed her career as a clinical psychologist to become one of Australia's most effective communicators on matters of the mind. Rebecca has helped many members of her large online community and her clients do the same.
In Small Habits for a Big Life, Dr Rebecca Ray breaks down the process for her reader. She explains how we can override the part of the brain that seeks pleasure and comfort (ice cream and wine) and activate the parts that tolerate some discomfort for the sake of long-term goals (an hour of study instead of an hour of TV).
Small Habits for a Big Life clears the way for readers to embark on their own path to change and provides exactly the right amount of support along the way.
- GenresSelf HelpNonfiction
224 pages, Paperback
Published September 12, 2023
33 people are currently reading
250 people want to read
About the author
Rebecca Ray
7 books44 followersDr Rebecca Ray is a clinical psychologist, author and speaker who helps big-picture-thinking people master their psychology. Over the course of two decades of consultations, speaking events, books, and audio, she has encouraged thousands of humans making an impact on the world to live a life that's fulfilling, unapologetic, and free.
Beck’s expertise as a professional zig-zagger sets her apart as one of Australia’s most in-demand and authoritative voices in the personal development space. Her science-backed, hard and heart truth approach is uniquely informed by her pivots from pilot to psychologist, from dating men to marrying a woman, and from being burnt out to bestselling author.
Beck is the author of six books, including Be Happy, The Art of Self-Kindness, The Universe Listens to Brave, Setting Boundaries, Small Habits for a Big Life, and Difficult People (released in May 2023).
She lives in the soul-fed hills of the Sunshine Coast in Queensland with the great loves of her life: her wife Nyssa, son Bennett, two rescue Irish Setters and one gangly Weimaraner.
Beck’s expertise as a professional zig-zagger sets her apart as one of Australia’s most in-demand and authoritative voices in the personal development space. Her science-backed, hard and heart truth approach is uniquely informed by her pivots from pilot to psychologist, from dating men to marrying a woman, and from being burnt out to bestselling author.
Beck is the author of six books, including Be Happy, The Art of Self-Kindness, The Universe Listens to Brave, Setting Boundaries, Small Habits for a Big Life, and Difficult People (released in May 2023).
She lives in the soul-fed hills of the Sunshine Coast in Queensland with the great loves of her life: her wife Nyssa, son Bennett, two rescue Irish Setters and one gangly Weimaraner.
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
July 26, 2022
An excellent, simple guide to making lasting changes.
This is the kind of book I'll keep close and refer back to often. It's full of wisdom, motivation and practical ideas.
Some self-help books can come off preachy but this is absolutely not the case here. The author backs every statement with evidence and provides case studies, including some of her own experiences. This includes some of the negative habits we all experience, and it helps us to connect to the author and really value the lessons she's giving here.
The book is set out in a manner that makes it easy to read, and there's plenty of space to use it as a workbook. If you're serious about changing your habits, I recommend keeping pen and paper handy. I stopped a few times when the book requested something be pondered, and it was quite fascinating just to see real examples from my own life. I enjoyed setting some SMART goals based on my own values, and exploring who I'd consider to be my 'accountability person' and my 'encouragement person'. Some parts I wasn't quite ready to think on, so I'll go back to those later. This is absolutely the kind of book you can work through at your own pace - pick up sporadically, read through first and then go back and do the work, read certain parts when you're ready to face certain tasks, etc.
This is an encouraging book that I'd highly recommend to anyone looking to make lasting changes towards a more fulfilling life. It details the hurdles and how to overcome them, and provides evidence of these things in action. It gives you permission to do things at your own pace, and it allows for the simple fact that we are all human, and imperfect.
Loved it.
With thanks to Macmillan for a copy
This is the kind of book I'll keep close and refer back to often. It's full of wisdom, motivation and practical ideas.
Some self-help books can come off preachy but this is absolutely not the case here. The author backs every statement with evidence and provides case studies, including some of her own experiences. This includes some of the negative habits we all experience, and it helps us to connect to the author and really value the lessons she's giving here.
The book is set out in a manner that makes it easy to read, and there's plenty of space to use it as a workbook. If you're serious about changing your habits, I recommend keeping pen and paper handy. I stopped a few times when the book requested something be pondered, and it was quite fascinating just to see real examples from my own life. I enjoyed setting some SMART goals based on my own values, and exploring who I'd consider to be my 'accountability person' and my 'encouragement person'. Some parts I wasn't quite ready to think on, so I'll go back to those later. This is absolutely the kind of book you can work through at your own pace - pick up sporadically, read through first and then go back and do the work, read certain parts when you're ready to face certain tasks, etc.
This is an encouraging book that I'd highly recommend to anyone looking to make lasting changes towards a more fulfilling life. It details the hurdles and how to overcome them, and provides evidence of these things in action. It gives you permission to do things at your own pace, and it allows for the simple fact that we are all human, and imperfect.
Loved it.
With thanks to Macmillan for a copy
June 28, 2022
I read and reviewed Rebecca’s, Setting Boundaries, and found it really worth my while. Once more she has provided a balance of solid theory and practice towards regaining your equilibrium and establishing wellbeing as a central focus. This time the focus is on understanding the steps of positive habit formation.
‘Values are the language of our authentic self, and they are foundational in habit change because they remind us that helpful habits shape and create a life that we are proud to live, and are worth the time and effort to create.’
Once again this is a practical book, backed with science and easy to follow journal questions for reflection. Rebecca provides you with the tools, case studies and strategies that can help you make small steps towards a better life. It is all about making changes that are more in alignment with your values and what is important to you. We continue doing what we do because that is comfortable but sometimes benefits come from stepping out of that comfort zone.
‘Goals are important because life without them can pass by unchecked all too easily. When we don’t stop to reflect on whether or not we are on track to living the way we want to live, then we run the risk of living a ‘some day’ life, spending our time focused on the things we plan to do . . . some day.’
Rebecca is authentic and realistic and knows this is not an easy process - we are not programmed for this necessarily as humans. Progress is rarely in a straight line and daily living does not often accommodate such changes. Yet discomfort is part of life and of this we must be accepting. Understand that although challenging, life will be more of what you seek in the long term.
‘It means that we focus on the process, the daily efforts towards something meaningful, the satisfaction of overcoming small problems and challenges as they occur along the way, and the little wins that bring us closer to a larger goal. This is the kind of motivation that is about daily action in line with values.’
The stars probably will not align for you to begin. However, change begins the moment you do something differently. Start small. Be imperfect. But most importantly …. start now.
This review is based on a complimentary copy from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. The quoted material may have changed in the final release.
‘Values are the language of our authentic self, and they are foundational in habit change because they remind us that helpful habits shape and create a life that we are proud to live, and are worth the time and effort to create.’
Once again this is a practical book, backed with science and easy to follow journal questions for reflection. Rebecca provides you with the tools, case studies and strategies that can help you make small steps towards a better life. It is all about making changes that are more in alignment with your values and what is important to you. We continue doing what we do because that is comfortable but sometimes benefits come from stepping out of that comfort zone.
‘Goals are important because life without them can pass by unchecked all too easily. When we don’t stop to reflect on whether or not we are on track to living the way we want to live, then we run the risk of living a ‘some day’ life, spending our time focused on the things we plan to do . . . some day.’
Rebecca is authentic and realistic and knows this is not an easy process - we are not programmed for this necessarily as humans. Progress is rarely in a straight line and daily living does not often accommodate such changes. Yet discomfort is part of life and of this we must be accepting. Understand that although challenging, life will be more of what you seek in the long term.
‘It means that we focus on the process, the daily efforts towards something meaningful, the satisfaction of overcoming small problems and challenges as they occur along the way, and the little wins that bring us closer to a larger goal. This is the kind of motivation that is about daily action in line with values.’
The stars probably will not align for you to begin. However, change begins the moment you do something differently. Start small. Be imperfect. But most importantly …. start now.
This review is based on a complimentary copy from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. The quoted material may have changed in the final release.
July 24, 2022
- thanks to @macmillanaus for my #gifted copy
A was a big fan of Dr Ray’s previous book, Setting Boundaries, so I was very excited to give Small Habits for a Big Life a go and hopefully learn about self-sabotage because, who does not need a little bit of help in that regard? Fortunately, Dr Ray knows how to create impact theoretically and practically.
Personally, my biggest gain from this book is the reassurance that biologically, brains tend to stick to habits, regardless of how good or bad they are for us, or how badly we want to change them. Knowing that changing a habit is hard because brains are programmed to resist change was utterly helpful and encouraging. I thoroughly enjoyed reading and learning about why changes are hard, and why it is also possible to create new habits to replace those we want to change.
The book is full of case scenarios and easy-to-follow, real-life (and relatable!) examples that portray people and their journeys to modify habits and ultimately, change their lives for the better. These examples helped me to understand that the more specific the goal, the bigger the chances to make a real change and impact routines and habits. It is pretty easy to desire generic and unspecific things that lead us continually to failure, so learning about concentrating on very specific things was undoubtedly useful.
Because I read Dr Ray’s previous book not long ago, I was able to identify some examples in this book that she used in her previous one, which led me to believe that she might have not had enough time to work on this book as she would have wished. This book is also significantly shorter than the previous one, so I naturally ended up wanting more of Dr Ray’s wisdom.
Overall, Small Habits for a Big Life is an insightful, easy-to-follow and practical guide on how to overcome self-sabotage and achieve long-term goals. It is full of practical and reassuring advice on how to accept discomfort and failure as part of the process without letting discouragement win. I would recommend it to readers looking to learn about self-development.
A was a big fan of Dr Ray’s previous book, Setting Boundaries, so I was very excited to give Small Habits for a Big Life a go and hopefully learn about self-sabotage because, who does not need a little bit of help in that regard? Fortunately, Dr Ray knows how to create impact theoretically and practically.
Personally, my biggest gain from this book is the reassurance that biologically, brains tend to stick to habits, regardless of how good or bad they are for us, or how badly we want to change them. Knowing that changing a habit is hard because brains are programmed to resist change was utterly helpful and encouraging. I thoroughly enjoyed reading and learning about why changes are hard, and why it is also possible to create new habits to replace those we want to change.
The book is full of case scenarios and easy-to-follow, real-life (and relatable!) examples that portray people and their journeys to modify habits and ultimately, change their lives for the better. These examples helped me to understand that the more specific the goal, the bigger the chances to make a real change and impact routines and habits. It is pretty easy to desire generic and unspecific things that lead us continually to failure, so learning about concentrating on very specific things was undoubtedly useful.
Because I read Dr Ray’s previous book not long ago, I was able to identify some examples in this book that she used in her previous one, which led me to believe that she might have not had enough time to work on this book as she would have wished. This book is also significantly shorter than the previous one, so I naturally ended up wanting more of Dr Ray’s wisdom.
Overall, Small Habits for a Big Life is an insightful, easy-to-follow and practical guide on how to overcome self-sabotage and achieve long-term goals. It is full of practical and reassuring advice on how to accept discomfort and failure as part of the process without letting discouragement win. I would recommend it to readers looking to learn about self-development.
July 19, 2022
I found this more accessible and helpful than James Clear’s Atomic habits. A good combination of theory, practical methods, and real examples of how small habits, chipping away, working towards your values, and self-compassion can work towards positive change in your life. I liked the handy paperback size, and the worksheets/exercises to fill in to get you in the right track for meaningful change.
August 9, 2022
Do you have intentional habits or routines that you follow? Are there things that you’d love to start doing but just can’t seem to make a new habit stick? This could be the book for you 🤗
I was feeling a bit unanchored when I picked this book up and thought I could use some help getting into a new rhythm. The key habits I was trying to embed were a daily meditation practice and less screen time on devices.
It was a bit of a mental slog to begin with and like a lot of self help books, this wasn’t a book that was easy to pick up over a captivating fiction read.
However I liked the second half! I found the book to be practical and although the idea of value-driven actions (characteristic of CBT) was familiar to me, it did motivate me to try and start a few new habits.
My favourite sections of the book covered the management of uncomfortable feelings and emotional awareness. Things that are key to understanding and overcoming self sabotage behaviour as well as getting back up after failing.
The ease with which our brains fall into habits with a complete disregard for whether they are taking us closer to or further away from where we want to be, is in some ways scary and in other ways comforting. It gives unintentional actions the ability to harm us while also giving us the confidence and power to make changes to our lives.
Rating this book got me thinking about how I rate my books. To what extent is the rating about the reading experience, about enjoyment and about the writing itself?
I landed on a 3 stars but I will note that most informative/self help books will be ranked lower than super enjoyable fiction reads unless they completely change my life in some way.
Also I haven’t read atomic habits so I’m not sure how it compares or how similar it is?
Thank you Macmillan Australia for the gifted copy!
I was feeling a bit unanchored when I picked this book up and thought I could use some help getting into a new rhythm. The key habits I was trying to embed were a daily meditation practice and less screen time on devices.
It was a bit of a mental slog to begin with and like a lot of self help books, this wasn’t a book that was easy to pick up over a captivating fiction read.
However I liked the second half! I found the book to be practical and although the idea of value-driven actions (characteristic of CBT) was familiar to me, it did motivate me to try and start a few new habits.
My favourite sections of the book covered the management of uncomfortable feelings and emotional awareness. Things that are key to understanding and overcoming self sabotage behaviour as well as getting back up after failing.
The ease with which our brains fall into habits with a complete disregard for whether they are taking us closer to or further away from where we want to be, is in some ways scary and in other ways comforting. It gives unintentional actions the ability to harm us while also giving us the confidence and power to make changes to our lives.
Rating this book got me thinking about how I rate my books. To what extent is the rating about the reading experience, about enjoyment and about the writing itself?
I landed on a 3 stars but I will note that most informative/self help books will be ranked lower than super enjoyable fiction reads unless they completely change my life in some way.
Also I haven’t read atomic habits so I’m not sure how it compares or how similar it is?
Thank you Macmillan Australia for the gifted copy!
December 26, 2024
I can't believe I finished this in one sitting. I felt deeply connected to the message(s) being conveyed through the book and found the progression of the chapters elevated and cemented the content covered in the previous ones. The practical exercises provided in each chapter gave me the space I needed to practice more empathy and self compassion towards myself - especially in relation to the milestones and goals I have personally set for myself at this stage in my life. The ending of the book felt like a full circle moment that I can only describe as a warm hug from my future self after struggling with the chaos and tug of war sensation I have been having with my own inner voice for quite some time. There were many important bite-sized and easy to digest information scattered across the ten chapters of this book that I am certain will be applicable to anyone who chooses to pick this book up with the intention of wanting to change their life.
February 2, 2025
Another take at how to make positive changes in your life. The author had some great insight and advice on how to implement small but consistent change so that you can live your best life. Though there was nothing particularly earth shattering or new in this book, it reaffirmed that being kind to yourself and incorporating self-care rituals are important in the process. I particularly liked her thoughts on our willpower being attached to our level of self care. This was a fast read and would suit people who need/want some quick advice to get them started on the journey.
December 31, 2022
A lot of this is also mentioned in her other works, but it is still good advice. And absolutely worth a read.
Follow her on Instagram where she also has lots of videos. Some days I think I need to hear things so many times… before it sinks in.
4 stars
So far this year, my library saved me A$3719.57
Follow her on Instagram where she also has lots of videos. Some days I think I need to hear things so many times… before it sinks in.
4 stars
So far this year, my library saved me A$3719.57
March 31, 2023
A really easy to understand book about making changes and the challenges people face when trying new things. I really enjoyed the simplicity of this book and having the opportunity to work through some activities to relate things to my own experience.
June 5, 2023
MAKES SENSE
I’ve read 2 books by Dr Rebecca Ray. I like her writing style. She explains things but not to much. The questions to ask yourself are not complicated and are very helpful. She speaks about having compassion on yourself if you relapse.
I’ve read 2 books by Dr Rebecca Ray. I like her writing style. She explains things but not to much. The questions to ask yourself are not complicated and are very helpful. She speaks about having compassion on yourself if you relapse.
Read
June 22, 2024The books talks about how to develop habits and how persistent efforts without listening to the detractors can lead us to our goals and the need for a plan with regularity to achieve your dreams. Talks about procrastination and also about the need of thinking beyond perfectionism
November 26, 2024
Really punchy and motivating guide on the how and why of creating a life that feels meaningful to you. Great reflective activities and examples - really helpful as I review my year and look to the next.
October 1, 2022
Nothing groundbreaking here but I find Ray agreeably readable and her presentation and metaphors are still worth your time.
October 12, 2022
Amazing. I felt seen for once. Why I avoid and do mg self sabotaging habits and then how to Come back in line with who I really am. Wow. I love this book.
November 1, 2022
Boring read
November 5, 2022
Simple exercises as a reminder to help make changes in life. Buying a copy so I can refer back when needed.
January 4, 2023
Read it because someone gave it to me as a gift but it was really good actually
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 25, 2023
Great example. Good concept with a positive and empowering tone. Repetitive at times. 3.5.
March 7, 2023
loved it so much!
dnf
March 27, 2023it simply wasn't the right time for me to read this. I am far too burnt out and brain-foggy to get any use out of this right now. I hopefully will come back to it another time!
June 15, 2023
This took me a while as the messages in this book resonated with me and going through it, I wanted to capture and extract as much as I could.
January 14, 2024
Interesting
Read
August 6, 2024One of the best books i have read in a long time. Makes you really see whats going on inside & makes you address it
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews