you stupid slut

by Nat Raum

"you stupid slut" is a hybrid memoir that started as an ode to nat raum’s carefree early 20s and slowly turned into a reckoning with who the fuck they thought they were. diving deep into a pool of memories from (loosely) 2014-2019 that they had (almost entirely) tried to forget about, raum grapples with the role that their own reckless behavior played in the immense amount of harm this period of their life caused them. it's about reckoning with a loss of faith in love and humanity, but also so much about the ways they so desperately needed to prove they were lovable—as well as the gender confusion created by indulging in a pattern of self-destructive hypersexuality and substance abuse, both of which were born as coping mechanisms for unresolved emotional trauma. "you stupid slut" functions as almost an unrated version to raum’s previous work in "eventually i will learn to stop saying sorry," recollecting their destructively performative femininity through poetry, prose, form experiments, scraps of paper they probably shouldn’t have saved, and forgotten disposable camera snapshots.

100 pages, Paperback

Published July 15, 2022

About the author

nat raum (b. 1996) is a queer disabled artist and writer based on occupied Piscataway land in Baltimore, MD.

They graduated from the Maryland Institute College of Art in 2018 with a BFA in Photography and Book Arts and they are currently a second-year MFA candidate in Creative Writing & Publishing Arts at the University of Baltimore, where they have also served as managing editor of the school’s literary journal, Welter.

nat’s personal creative practice centers primarily upon their lived experience with loss and sexual trauma and subsequent C-PTSD diagnosis, often taking the form of small-edition image/text books and zines.

nat is the founder and editor-in-chief of fifth wheel press, a queer literature and art publishing space. nat's artwork has been exhibited at venues including the Museum of Human Achievement, ICA Baltimore, Blackrock Center for the Arts, and the Griffin Museum of Photography. Past publishers of their writing include Delicate Friend, ANMLY, and Corporeal Lit. Their recent published books include you stupid slut (dream boy book club, 2022), the abyss is staring back (Querencia Press, 2023), random access memory (Bullshit Lit, 2023), and several chapbooks and photography publications.

Reviews

[Romy Rhoads Ewing · Rating 5 out of 5]

holy shit

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

"the city of baltimore has plenty of buildings that don't remind you of things you with you could forget, but those aren't the ones you remember like you're still standing at the threshold" (64)

high-art zine-poetry-memoir - love love the blending of genre & storytelling while ripping your heart out (here's to all the pain of being an artist in their early 20s)

[Erika Gill · Rating 5 out of 5]

The mix of poetry, hybrid forms like wiki pages and material safety data sheets plus the photographic ephemera of a life in college make this book a nostalgic read of someone else’s life that feels very open, raw and honest.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is such tenderness towards their former selves in this inventive and at times heartbreaking work.

[stephanie]

i feel like i know too much about nat raum now and i don't know if i want to apologize for the intrusion or talk to someone about where i see old parts of myself in here too

[V.L. Parz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Raum reaches right through their ribcage and wrings their own heart out right in front of your eyes in you stupid slut. Authentic, captivating, and emotional, each word will keep you on the edge of your seat, feeling like you're right there with Raum as their mind unfolds before you.